The Chronicle of Renault Novus

[AvengedSevenfold]

Had a rather interesting conversation with someone about Umbra. I guess we're screwing ourselves over "more than you know."

 

Renny and I have a system down where I have full control over the body during school and around family, and he gets control of the body everywhere else. He gets to control the body a lot more than you might think. Yes, that means that he is actually typing this up for me while I dictate to him what to say.

Wow, funny how that's reversed.

 

I would love to talk to someone about...stuff. I don't know, I'm just feeling a bit rough right now. Renny continues to be the sole reason for my existence.

[AvengedSevenfold]

Renny’s time in which he controls the body is slowly starting to increase. He’s even possessed during school, and had his first face-to-face conversation. I’ll admit, I was a bit worried because his control over the physical voice hasn’t been 100% in the past, but he did just fine. This person knew about Renny, and explained what he was doing.

 

Also, one evening, Renny was controlling the body as per usual. After awhile, I told him that I wanted to control the body again, and he was fine with it, but when I started to move it, it felt really heavy. I found that it was too uncomfortable, so I let him “pilot” again.

I haven’t really had anything like that happen since then. Maybe it was just a fluke, or the result of him possessing too long.

[AvengedSevenfold]

Hey guys! It's Renny.

 

It seems like I'll start to be the one posting instead of Artus, since I'm the one typing anyways.

Plus I'm a bit more friendly ;)

 

We'll see! I certainly hope so!

 

Possession is going great! I am so happy that I can do full-body! I enjoy the time I get. The more I practice, the longer I am able to control it. Maybe one day Artus will let me control it for a full day.

 

Artus' mood occasionally is poor for seemingly no reason, but if I remind him of Umbra, then he's able to kick it out of his mind and he feels better.

The trick is to remember that it's not him! I hope we get better at it. It will sometimes last for almost a full day before we remember, simply because he is thinking brooding thoughts rather than how to feel better.

I try my best. He tells me to always stay by his side, even if he says he wants to be left alone at that moment.

 

I think that will be all for now! Thanks for reading guys!

[AvengedSevenfold]

Hey guys! Renny again!

 

Some crazy stuff happened! I'll type for Artus, since he's always better at writing things than I am.

 

 

We sat in a room solely created for serious discussions, such as when we all met to decide what to do with Scythe. Funnily enough, instead of being the one under question, Semnos was the one leading the session.

 

We discussed Patrick and Calli's decision to merge. Semnos made me realize that Patrick actually had made me on purpose. I had always thought I was an accident, but he pointed out that he was certainly aware of the fact that he was making a new person.

I looked back into the memories and realized that he was right.

 

He also asserted that, if it was still a problem, that I had no choice in the matter, and that I had nothing to blame. I mean, I've been told that before, but it's something completely different to actually realize that. Also, he pointed out that I was quite a unique and wonderful person, and he reminded me of all my different strengths.

As Renny puts it: "He made you realize how awesome you are! :D"

 

Of course, our conversation lasted a long time, but I'm summing it up.

At this point, I was feeling much better about almost everything.

 

Then the strangest thing happened. The room we were in started to grow this long, glowing red cracks. They started getting wider and brighter until the whole room turned into a lake of lava, which we floated above.

 

Of course, I had no idea what was going on, but Renny told me that it was my subconscious. What was odd was that the lake cooled rapidly until it turned into stone.

 

Something else to note: since then, I haven't seen or felt Umbra's presence.

[AvengedSevenfold]

Heyo everyone! It's safe to assume that I (Renny) will be the one posting from here on!

 

We've decided to make our discussions with Artus a weekly thing to prevent his depression from coming back. It's so nice to see him in such a happy mood, I tell you what.

 

Artus acheived full dissociation from the body for a few seconds the other day. It's definitely a sign that we are starting to get somewhere.

 

We are plugging away at it. We will get this before the end of the year, I tell you!

 

Other than that, nothing much else to add. It's all becoming routine and stuff, you know how that goes.

[AvengedSevenfold]

Artus has been trying to defeat the lie that he has been telling himself, that is, that he is a burden on others.

It makes him extremely reluctant to talk to others except when he is the one helping them. Also, he will sometimes push people away "for their own good" because he does nothing but "bother them".

 

Went to the doctor for a checkup for depression. I tried to convince Artus to tell about how he has been feeling suicidal, but he says he couldn't make himself do it. There were several opportunities to say something, or at least ask for help, or SOMETHING. At least say that you have been feeling worse!

Not that I'm frustrated or anything.

[AvengedSevenfold]

Been working on possession. Right now, we’re working towards letting me have control for a full day, which I haven’t ever done. I mean, sure, I’ve done most of a day before, but never a complete day.

I suppose the eventual goal is to let me be in control almost all the time then get to a point where we can switch.

 

Artus has discovered some rather fascinating. I’m not quite sure how to describe it. It’s almost like a second personality or mindset. He acts a bit...silly? Nay, the best word to describe it is cute. Of course, he finds it embarrassing but it is so adorable! He becomes childish and just...damn adorable. I really don't know how to describe it.

In order for it to take hold, though, he has to let it in. I wish he would totally just post something while he’s like that to demonstrate it, but he is hesitant.

Did I mention that it embarrasses him? xD

I mean, this is really something to note, but I am terrible with words and I can't describe it. Comments are welcome, as always.

 

It certainly makes me wonder how something like this came about. Not sure if it's from his creation or emotional issues or what.

 

Oh, I feel the need to clarify. He's not really suicidal anymore, I promise. He just feels alienated, and that no one understands. Just generally miserable, I suppose. I mean, it's definitely better than before, but it still needs work. Who knows? Maybe it will continue to improve.

 

Nothing much to mention with the others. Semnos and Kari have started meditating together, and Andy is still doing his adviser and guardian thing.

[AvengedSevenfold]

It's us again. Honestly, I can't even try to recount all the events of the past...however long it's been since I've posted.

 

Basically, we decided that it's time to come clean. This will probably appear sudden, but I swear that it's all the truth. We've been thinking about this for a long time. I honestly don't even know how to gently tell this, so I'm just going to throw it all out there.

 

Firstly, Artus is female. Her real name is Artemis, but I've taken to calling her by the nickname "Missy." She is extremely mistrustful and didn't trust people to be cool with it, but she's tired of misguiding everyone.

Andy's real name is Auri. She is female.

Kari's real name is Kat.

Artemis and I worked together to make a new tulpa who is named Liam. We felt it necessary because Auri was lonely, and we noticed that none of us are particularly good with words. Liam serves as the poet/scribe of the group, and uses formalities such as "Sir" and "Ma'am" when he talks.

 

The past few days have been particularly rough. It got to the point where Artemis started to go numb from emotion overload. This lasted until last night, where I had to forcibly possess (and yes, I can do that despite everyone saying that I'm not supposed to be able to) the body and prevent her from hurting it and herself. With the help of someone else who I shan't name unless they want me to (you know exactly who you are), we managed to talk her out of it.

 

Afterwards, she felt extremely "raw and exposed" but grateful for both I and the other person. The other person warned her not to let herself become numb again, so we've been working hard not to let it happen.

 

There's that. I hope it's not a bit much. I'm not too great with words, so I hope it all makes sense.

[AvengedSevenfold]

It seems that our early work with emotions has actually had some use. Artemis has found that, in Wonderland, she can make a drug to simulate the aftereffects of the emotional overload; that is, she can make herself become emotionally numb. Although it may seem weird that it is purely imaginary, the effects are all of the mind, so its effects are actually quite real and last up to 24 hours. She has promised to avoid using it in fear that it isn't healthy for her emotional well-being in the long run. After all, running from your feelings is a temporary solution and they come back even worse.

 

Also, last night, I went into her subconscious and affected her ability to remember who she was (with her permission, of course). We found that she had difficulty forming complete thoughts on her own and she couldn't recall any detailed memories, although she had vague ideas of where she came from and how she got to where she was. However, she knew exactly who I was, and trusted me to tell her who she was. This was our goal, and I took the time to boost her self-confidence. I told her about her strengths, how beautiful she was, and how strong she was as an individual. I should add that I had to control the body while she was in that state.

Today, she can hardly remember what happened last night. She does seem extremely tired, though. I am not completely sure if it was useful at all, but I hope it has some effect on how she views herself.

 

I still am unable to possess for a whole day. I try but I tire out. Sure, I can do the better part of the day, but doing a full, complete day still escapes me.

[Abvieon]

It's us again. Honestly, I can't even try to recount all the events of the past...however long it's been since I've posted.

 

Basically, we decided that it's time to come clean. This will probably appear sudden, but I swear that it's all the truth. We've been thinking about this for a long time. I honestly don't even know how to gently tell this, so I'm just going to throw it all out there.

 

Firstly, Artus is female. Her real name is Artemis, but I've taken to calling her by the nickname "Missy." She is extremely mistrustful and didn't trust people to be cool with it, but she's tired of misguiding everyone.

Andy's real name is Auri. She is female.

Kari's real name is Kat.

Artemis and I worked together to make a new tulpa who is named Liam. We felt it necessary because Auri was lonely, and we noticed that none of us are particularly good with words. Liam serves as the poet/scribe of the group, and uses formalities such as "Sir" and "Ma'am" when he talks.

 

The past few days have been particularly rough. It got to the point where Artemis started to go numb from emotion overload. This lasted until last night, where I had to forcibly possess (and yes, I can do that despite everyone saying that I'm not supposed to be able to) the body and prevent her from hurting it and herself. With the help of someone else who I shan't name unless they want me to (you know exactly who you are), we managed to talk her out of it.

 

Afterwards, she felt extremely "raw and exposed" but grateful for both I and the other person. The other person warned her not to let herself become numb again, so we've been working hard not to let it happen.

 

There's that. I hope it's not a bit much. I'm not too great with words, so I hope it all makes sense.

 

I apologize if I had missed something you've said before relating to this, as I haven't read your entire progress report, but why exactly had you been untruthful about the names and genders of some of your fellow tulpae and host?