Adverse effects attributed to tulpaforcing

[Pedonymous]

The pain I've felt is more like a mental pain than a physical one.

[Guest]

The pain I've felt is more like a mental pain than a physical one.

 

>tfw 86 hours and no talking yet

[NesterBones]

problems before learning about tulpas:

sporadic memory loss - anywhere from long term to short. short term more common.

deja vu - almost constantly

mild insomnia - self-diagnosis

mild add - self-diagnosis

 

problems after starting espeon:

pressure - only in the beginning before i could pick up emotional responses. same for kass. occurred mainly at the base of the skull but also happened in the sinuses.

common confusion - theoretically from forcing constantly

rare bursts of paranoia - stemming from personal fears to doubts to the fear of losing control during meditation. im also pretty wary of sleep paralysis and potential horrific hallucinations.

 

noteworthy changes since i began:

rarer occurrences of deja vu - it's been a while since i've had it

more sleep gotten - either because of the relaxation of my dream-state meditation or from just wanting to sleep in the wonderland.

increased feeling of masculinity - after kass came about

expansion of mental abilities - mind over matter and such. i made a regular cigarette affect me like pot the other day. doors were opened.

 

in the end there has been both good and bad effects this has all had on me.

[WhiiteRussian]

sometimes wen i touch my weener bone, weird goo comes out

 

does this mean i tulpaforced too hard?

[MuonMax]

Actually, it means you tulpaforced while hard.

[Virgil]

>seeing sparks in your field of vision isn't normal

>mfw I have no face

Yeah, neither are headaches. I thought the qualification that it should be of unusual intensity, frequency, coincidence, or, well, unusual in general was unnecessary. Apparently, one should always be overly specific on the internet. Well, lesson learned. But don't expect me to follow it, as I'm really lazy and unmindful.

By the way, you do have a face— a rather fitting one at that.

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I guess I should now peruse the replies and add the new symptoms and move the unconfirmed ones, but as I said, I'm too lazy. I'll do it tomorrow.

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Oh and, Knapp, Taco Wizard, and Sands, holy… I don't know how often you experience those effects and how strong they are, but there are so many and some are quite weird. If I were you, I'd probably freak out and go see a doctor or something. Let's hope they're harmless.

[Sands]

Hello doctor?

 

Yes, I have this problem that every time I talk to this sapient creature in my head I- doctor, what is wrong? Who are you calling, doctor? Doc?

[Virgil]

I realise the following thoughts and ideas are a stretch, but if you're interested in very amateur neuroscience or neuropsychology, read on, but I advise you to use critical thinking.

 

A couple of years ago, I heard or read somewhere that somatosensory information, namely nociception, thermoception, and a certain kind of mechanoception (I don't remember which) originating in the head, especially cranium, and upper portion of the back around the spine, is all processed by a specific area in the somatosensory cortex or several adjacent subareas, that is, virtually by a single structure. Another very close areas are those that receive sensory signals from the lower jaw and the thoraic cavity. This could also partially account for the ear and jaw pain. Unfortunately, I can't find any sources confirming this speculation, so don't regard it as factual. However, let's assume it's valid to some extent for the sake of the following surmise.

Headaches and pressure are the most consistently reported symptoms. Furthermore, the onset usually occurs fairly early in the process. I don't know why that is, but this information indicates there's something going on in the somatosensory cortex or that the mentioned structure is more susceptible to the effects of the process. Well, this is all mere conjecture, and it's only going to get worse. I think some kinds of rogue neural signals are being either generated within these areas or sent into them from elsewhere. But why this particular region of the brain? I suggest you draw your own hypotheses, because I don't want to get deeper into this. However, I'm almost certain the somatosensory cortex is not the source of a tulpa's sentience.

Of course, as the structures and mechanisms that make up a tulpa develop, they eventually interconnect, or, if the process is more centralised, the central mechanism gains access to and influence over the most areas of the cerebral cortex: those that process or manage memory, perception, whatever the frontal lobes do (consciousness? sapience?), and even motor control, which is corroborated by multiple reports of possession/fronting, and others.

Damn, I'm getting well beyond the scope of what I intended to type, so I'll stop here.

I'd like to address the symptoms mentioned in this thread. All of the sensations obviously originate in the cerebral cortex, and therefore have no "physical" cause. I'd particularly like to point out the mentioned auras *, which are caused by electrical storms in the brain usually limited to the cerebral cortex. I'll call them seizures for simplicity. Examples of their causes are epilepsy and migraines.

I should note here that headaches caused by migraine are different from tulpaforcing headaches, because they probably originate elsewhere and are much more intense. Migraines are greatly exacerbated by external stimuli, for example ones produced by vigorously shaking the head, while tulpaforcing headaches should be mostly unaffected by it. I'm of the opinion that the latter is not a true sensation of pain, but merely a sensation of pain intensity— whatever it means. It'd be interesting to see whether analgesics would affect these kinds of pain differently.

These seizures or migraines may be asymptomatic, even without any auras present, but that's irrelevant. What's important is that auras comprise many of these phantom sensations, but they are understandably more intense and diverse than tulpaforcing symptoms (see the list of symptoms the word aura, which can be regarded as their hypernym, encompasses). I think an apparent connection can be seen here. It's far from confirmed, though, yet my flawed reasoning relies on it. Ah, never mind.

So, to summarise it, what seem to be the obvious cause of the mentioned effects are disorganised, albeit still more directed than in seizures, electrical impulses. I also think they are very different in that they have a distinct source or sources, a point of origin. To answer the questions where they originate, why, and many more requires more research. We can surmise in this amateurish fashion all day, but unless there's a genius with some knowledge of neuroscience and willingness to take this up, we can't develop more profound hypotheses without proper research and fMRI or at least EEG scans (yeah, but they're considerably cheaper) and someone versed in this field. Hell, I would love to see fMRI results of the brain while it's experiencing these illusory sensations.

So, back to the topic at hand. All of the symptoms are clearly unwanted; well, as long as you don't view them as indicators of progress (questionable at best, imo), but nevertheless, their effects are still undesired, as they hardly contribute to the main objective — they should be absent in a person with a fully developed tulpa. In short, the developing tulpa, or the unconscious executive functions, or whatever is managing and guiding the creation process is not doing a very good job if it produces such collateral, incidental effects.

I've made a simple, as yet unconfirmed observation over the past month, whose truth I'm not sure of: People who relatively effortlessly and quickly manage to create a mature tulpa usually exhibit fewer of the listed undesired effects, which tend to be less intense, too. That, along with the aura parallel, hints at the possible progress-hindering discord, randomness, or incoherence they are signs of. Perhaps the process should be more refined and systematic in order for a tulpa to become sapient, coherent, and being able to properly access all of the necessary subconscious mechanisms and reach the host's conscious mind. I'd better not get into how differently structured the brain and cerebral cortex can be in various individuals.

The twitches are particularly interesting, because people say they can be limited to fairly small groups of fascicles. Before I encountered this symptom, I'd thought that movements on such a small scale can be actuated only by the peripheral nervous system, or rather a malfunction thereof, but it turns out the cerebral cortex itself can control movements of smaller muscle portions. Perhaps tulpas can learn how to perform such movements. A useless but interesting task. Perhaps there are even people who can do this consciously. Another interesting fact is that this is the only effect that can produce efferent signals. Then again, there aren't many other conscious efferent actions.

Okay, I think I'm done prating. Someone knowledgeable should, perhaps at their leisure, develop some working neuropsychologic theories and post them in the research board, so others can stea— uh, I mean draw from and expound them. I admit, it kind of bothers me, this lack of anything more solid to grasp on, the lack progress in research, and the seeming general disinterest to conduct open research, which this community could have access to. There surely won't be anything interesting happening any time soon regarding science, so let's go back to wild, vague, and probably wrong hypotheses. Well, we got to start somewhere.

 

* I don't know where this one came from, but I think I saw it once in the IRC chat when I still lurked in there

[Knapp]

Now that is a wall of text if I ever saw one.

 

Also, most the effects I have experienced are less "strong" and/or are less frequent now. Or they don't really bother me so much. And they didn't all emerge at the same time, they come and go. It's like someone is poking on shit in my brain and things happen. (strangely fitting lol)

[Sands]

Brotip: when you write and press enter, press it twice in your case for better readability! /brotip

 

Haha that's a lot of text. I too can report that all the symptoms mostly happened in the beginning and that's when they were the strongest. The oh-shit-I-am-in-such-pain-I-must-stop-now-or-else-I'll-throw-up-on-myself pain was only like my... second day or something silly like that. Now they don't bother me much, even though I feel them, they're not very strong. I do still feel something in my head every time I have a session, but it's not what I felt in the beginning. Same spots, though.

 

It might be a bit silly to call them headaches, I guess, it has the same kind of feeling but it doesn't have as much pain and suffering behind it. I'm not sure if they are quite unwanted, in the beginning the feeling gave me something that I can talk to and helped in that matter. Now headaches and other pressure in my head is a good way to communicate with a tulpa who I can't hear or whose writing I can't read, as I can't quite make feelings like he can so there's no fear of puppeting. Also when it comes to normal headaches, while I can usually pretty easily say where the pain comes from, my whole head seems to be in pain more or less. Tulpa-headaches only have one area, sometimes two, which I can point out where it happens when it's happening.

 

Also asking a tulpa to move a headache from one side to the another is interesting. For me, it felt like the pain/feeling crawling through my head, I could feel it inside and in the middle parts of my head before it settled on the other side. Freakiest feeling inside my head 2012.

 

But please, do tell us more about the squishy thing inside our head, if you have something you wish to tell us.