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I wanted to ask a question, it might sound like a beginner since in close to 3months trying really hard to feel and connect to my tulpa
I was able to, like two times, but only touches, no voice, not many thoughts at all only 1 time i felt her thought in my mind.

how hard was it to connect to ur first tulpa??
i tried so many approaches but it seems like hearing her vocalization is the hardest of them all.
was it really hard to get into your host's mind the first times?

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I do think that's the hardest part of tulpamancy. Some people somehow just accomplish vocality pretty quick and go from there, but they're very lucky. Even in our case, after spending months of focusing on Reisen and really feeling like she was there, she still couldn't really talk. My first tulpa to talk was either Flandre or Tewi (I don't remember this time in my life super well), and that was only because I had already set the precedent in my mind for another person to exist with Reisen - but she still couldn't talk yet, and it was one of the other two who just kind of appeared that talked first. Later on, they told me it was me stopping her from talking, because I was too scared she wouldn't be "perfect" if she talked in a way other than mindvoice/feelings. Weird quirk, but the point is, like basically everyone else struggling with vocality, it was pretty much my fault as the host for not accepting my tulpa being able to talk, out of fear of it not being real enough.

 

Unless you're one of the lucky ones, first-vocality is by far the hardest part of the tulpamancy process. That's because your brain hasn't learned how to have a tulpa yet, and your tulpa is (most likely) not going to sound exactly like themselves, fully separate and obviously different from your own thoughts. At the start, they'll sound similar to you, and that's why host doubt is so crippling to the process. Your tulpa needs practice talking, being treated and accepted as being themselves actually saying things, in order for your brain to start building upon that. Then they start to gain skill with vocality, develop their own voice over time, and eventually (the timespan varies immensely by person of course) their voice is so obviously theirs and separate from yours, you could wonder how you ever doubted them.

 

But I think people tend to forget how hard it can be, right at the start. Looking back, one might think, just let your tulpa talk! Stop doubting them! But, that's because they're used to their tulpa having an obvious, separate mindvoice from their own. That's often not how it is. Your tulpa may well start out sounding very similar to your own thoughts or voice, and it may feel like you're speaking for them if you try to accredit that speaking to them.

 

But I assure you, this is how the process has to start. Your brain needs a basis for "Your tulpa's voice/speaking" - once it has a basis for what to even focus on, and what the goal is, then it can start creating the (mind)voice of another person. You tell it, "That's not me, that's my tulpa, trying to talk to me" - and your brain starts forming this new experience. Eventually, their vocality is fully developed - and creating another tulpa is often significantly easier now that your brain understands the concepts already - and it'll never even cross your mind to doubt "if it was them" speaking. But unfortunately, to get there many people will have to go through that very doubtful phase. Just keep in mind your goal, and your desired outcome, when interacting. You want to hear your tulpa, you want your brain to clearly present the two of you as totally separate people. It might not know how at first, but allowing it practice while keeping your desired outcome in mind should be enough to shape the experience into existence.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.

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