Niko's Tulpa Journals

[Nikodemos]

Well, no forcing was done yet during the creation of this entry, but we still have been making progress.

 

Yesterday, during my narration I asked if he'd like to eat food, where I got a yes answer. So, I sat down on the table, closed my eyes and created Dante's form, sitting on the table and taking bits of my food. He even seened to like it. But then another major thing happened last night. I asked my tulpa if he could wake me up at 6:30 am and not keep me up all night, which he seemed to agree. And surprisingly, I fell asleep quite fast, and woke up 6:50 am, still feeling tired as if I was woken up. We're both happy that we're making progress, and we're looking forward to do some more!

[Nikodemos]

I think something bad happened to Dante while I was asleep. When I tried talking to him, I didn't feel a response coming from him. Eventually he did reply, so I asked him if he saw my dream and was scared of it. He replied yes to both, and I apologized and comforted him for what happened.

 

Anyway, we did another forcing session with Dante, focusing on his form and a wonderland. We had some struggles first, but we eventually ended up on a simple design, a black void with a bunch of furniture. I also focused on his form, refining it and creating some gestures, how he smiles, looks sad, angry, disgusted etc.

 

This whole session lasted 30 minutes, added with feelings of spinning and head pressure, like my head was expanding from the inside.

2 hours 30 minutes of forcing now done in total.

[Nikodemos]

Well, no forcing again, but progress has been made.

 

We came into an agreement that the tingly spot in my ear is sort of like Dante's head, he can nod, shake his head, spin it etc. This should help clear up communication. Then two controversial things happened. First one being my wonderland. Since I didn't create Dante's form into the place I created yet, I decided to do so. But oddly, the instant I stopped his creation and focused on something else, he'd run off into the void. I could still control him and get him back to me, but the instant I lost focus he'd run off again. Eventually I just gave up, leaving the wonderland and Dante there running.

 

Then the other thing. I was just watching TV on my couch, when I got the tingling feel on my ear. I decided to ask if he wanted to go out, which he nodded as a response. I promised him we'd go out on the forest, even do some forcing. But there was a setback. When I finally got on my bike, cycled to the forest and sat down to force, I couldn't focus properly. I hate insects, and whenever one landed on me or flew past me, I'd instantly react and lose focus. I didn't last long, and I gave up and started cycling back home, apologizing Dante for my failure. For the following hours, I couldn't feel any kind of response from him, which got me worried. Eventually I got the feeling back, and I asked if he was mad at breaking my promise, which he nodded, he also stopped replying because of it. But then something odd happened, when I asked if he can forgive me. It wasn't a yes or no, I just felt his head going way down, not nodding nor shaking. We didn't talk for a while after that, I did get the tingly feeling every once in a while, until I replied to him during the creation of this entry. He is still mad at me, and he doesn't know if he can forgive me about it, but he can get over it, eventually.

 

So, that's it for now. I might do some more forcing later this day though.

[Nikodemos]

Alright, tonight's last forcing session, focusing more on visualizing as Dante seemed to want that. We mainly focused on several different facial expressions and body language. Also, I don't know how, but Dante's mask seems to have changed from the original one I thought about. Besides that nothing interesting happened, although Dante seemed to have changed from a tingle in the bottom of my ear to a pulsing in the middle of my ear during forcing. Plus my head feels like it's expanding from the inside again.

 

Another 30 minutes of forcing, adding a total of three hours.

[Nikodemos]

Holy Shit

 

That's the only two words I can use to describe what just happened. I was talking to tulpacouples in the chat, talking what had happened today(basically, I made up for breaking my promise by making extra effort to keep a new one). He seemed to appreciate it, so we were happy. But that isn't really important, what is more important is what happened when I did forcing. Tulpacouples suggested a puppet string technique, where I literally cut the puppet strings controlling Dante, to set him free, added with the prism technique.

 

That's when it happened, I was moving the plank on the prism, when I noticed Dante taking hold of the plank and stopping it. I had to actually struggle a bit to break it free from Dante's grip. Eventually I let him have it, and Dante actually broke it in half. That's when I noticed the strings, which I decided to cut. Then he just collapsed on the floor. I struggled to get him back up, and I eventually got him to a bed. I guess he was tired.

 

But anyway, I'm so excited about this, and I can't to wait to do more stuff with him!

[TulpaCouple]

Sounds like yet another tulpa who thinks the prism is stupid. But hey, can't argue with results right? Keep it up Niko, can't wait to 'meet' Dante when he's vocal!

[Nevermore]

Haha, I was thinking of using the prism but with all of these tulpae seeming to dislike it I wonder if I even should?

 

I recently cut the "puppet strings" on Arya as well, it seems like it helps to have that symbolic representation.

 

Good luck and keep it up! :)

[Nikodemos]

So, forcing hasn't really been done yet, just some narration, but I decided I'd share you this theory of mine.

 

For now, I haven't really heard of many people having to manage to get his tulpa to communicate with him, not to mention him actually moving in your wonderland in less than five hours of forcing, so I thought about it, my earlier years to be exact. You see, ever since I can remember, I've been talking to myself about my daily life, just as I would talk to Dante. So in theory I've been narrating to Dante for several years now, without even knowing about it. And then the second thing, my imagination. Whenever I'd see something cool, let it be a movie, a TV show or a toy set, I'd always lie down that day on my bed, and imagine I'd be living in those worlds, creating entire realms and people there, talking to them and generally living in them. Practice makes perfect in other words. If my theory can be proven correct, Dante might have been living in my subconcious as a fetus for several years now, and only now I could realize the potential he could become, that's why I've been progressing so fast.

 

But I can't really prove this correct until Dante can talk and ask what his first memory is, but in the other hand I can't wait for it!

 

Also, forgot to add the thirty minutes of forcing I did yesterday in wonderland, making a total of three hours thirty minutes.

[Nevermore]

I have to agree with your theory about talking to yourself before starting the tulpa-creating process. I know I used to do similar things, and then after starting to make a tulpa I realized I had been doing some similar things (like narrating sort of already), because I was bored or thinking aloud in my mind.

[Nikodemos]

More progress, yay!

 

I was chatting with a few of my friends in the IRC chat today, talking about our tulpas and theorizing stuff. Then I realized, Dante didn't have anything to communicate with me other than his body, so I decided to create a whiteboard(kudos for lemonlemon for the idea)in my wonderland, along with a box which Dante could use to spawn anything he wanted. But something weird happened.

 

When I entered my wonderland, there was already a whiteboard in it with a drawing I couldn't recognize. But still, I called Dante, showing the whiteboard and how it works by drawing a heart, a smiley and Mona Lisa in it. After that I created a white box which he could use to spawn anything he wanted. Again, I demonstrated this by pulling out a cat, another cat, a bunny and cubes from it.

 

After that, I looked back at the whiteboard, and I finally realized what the shape was, a fish. I asked if Dante wanted to go fishing, which he nodded. So, we went to some lake and sat down on a rowing boat. Unfortunately the boat would topple on Dante's weight(he's big), so I created an ocean cruiser and went to the sea. The experience was awesome, especially when we cooked the fish Dante caught in a campfire in the night. We talked a bit, and we both ate the fish with great appetite. I'm happy for Dante, especially when he now has a way to communicate with me.

 

And by this point, I think I am no longer tulpaforcing, as I am just spending time with Dante. That's why I stopped keeping track of the time. But anyway, we'll see how our situation evolves.