I gotta believe!

[Punch]

Well I've been lurking around here long enough that I figure it's time to finally start for reals on the whole tulpa thing, so here I am. This isn't actually my first rodeo, but last time I screwed up pretty badly due to my own lack of discipline and general doubt/apathy/lameness, so I'm starting from scratch. My primary goal this time around will be to not suck so much. Also possibly to make a tulpa.

 

For form, I'm going with Coco Pommel. Yeah, I know, a pony tulpa. How original. I was actually going to go with Toriel from Undertale, but I'm ridiculously attached to the character, and didn't want my tulpa to be burdened with that. I decided that I needed a form that:

 

1. I didn't expect to act any particular way (i.e. "You look like Pinkie Pie, you should be crazy and hyper.")
   
2. I liked enough to live with forever, and
   
3. I wasn't so attached to that I'd be upset if my tupper decides to change it.
   

 

As far as technique, I know myself well enough to know that I'm not disciplined enough to do hour counts and whatever, but I want to give this a little more effort than I did last time. I've been working on visualization, picking specific body parts and getting her to make faces and respond to various scenarios. I've also been narrating over video games and talking to her throughout the day, while trying to imagine her responses. I'm also looking into meditation and some of Fede's methods like "belief implanting" as well.

 

So, anyway. Here goes nothing. Until next time, Derpy and Coco signing off.

[NoneFromHell]

I know myself well enough to know that I'm not disciplined enough to do hour counts and whatever

 

Hour counts are obsolete anyway nowadays. Just develop in your own pace and spend as much time as you can spare, but this as regularly as possible.

 

Good luck with this!

[Vos]

Hey, tulpa ponies are starting to become pretty rare around here, so I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Keep in mind that the form isn't concrete, so if you two ever want to swap to a different form, go for it.

[Punch]

I need to learn to stop reading threads in the GD; it always puts me in a bad mood and saps my desire to write updates. Bleh.

 

Anyway. Visuals are a bitch. I'm using JD's guide, and I'm at the point that I can visualize any part of her by itself, but attempting to pull back and see her as a whole results in a blurry mess. As much as I enjoy the closeness

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

, it does make conversation kind of awkward. I did find some nice art of her with shading, which makes 3D visuals a little easier, so that's progress-ish. Kinda.

 

Personality forcing is going a little better. I'm not doing a list of traits or anything, but I'm doing little roleplay stories with her in my head to kind of flesh her out as a character. I know that counts as parroting/puppeting or whatever, but since the general consensus on this kind of thing is that there isn't a consensus and you should just tupper by the seat of your pants, that's exactly what I'm gonna do.

 

Which sounds like a good title for this PR, come to think of it.

 

Derpy and Coco out.

[Punch]

I haven't updated in a while, but I've been tuppering pretty much every day, with very little progress to speak of.

 

I keep getting hung up on visuals. Like, I know that the whole ultra-structured way of forcing is old and dumb and wrong and nobody does that anymore because, COME ON, IT'S 2016! Still, I start talking to her and then I get obsessed with how her head should look from a certain angle and then I tense up and get distracted and end up daydreaming about something totally unrelated, and no progress is made. It sucks.

 

One decision I made fairly early on is that FiM ponies are impossible to visualize in a 3D space without resorting to using the SFM models, which lose about 80% of the charm and expressiveness of their 2D variants. I'd love to say that that my motivations for tuppering had nothing to do with having a pony waifu, but that's not entirely true. Nonetheless, having a pony waifu is less important than having a awesome brain companion, so in light of that I decided some time ago to change her to her current form which is Lt. Judy Hopps:

 

 

For the record, I've never even seen Zootopia, but as forms go, it's cute and expressive and I can visualize her in 3D without giving myself a stroke, so that's what I'm going with. I've actually attempted to change her form a couple of times since then, but got a strong feeling of discomfort/annoyance/some unidentifiable negative emotion, so I decided to assume it was her and that she likes the form, or at least is comfortable with it. I don't want to call her Judy, and Coco doesn't seem to fit anymore, but I haven't come up with anything better, so suggestions are welcome, I guess.

 

Aside from that, I keep getting distracted when I try to narrate, because I have the attention span of a ferret with a meth habit. This leads me to believe that I need to set aside actual forcing time, and try some pink noise, and maybe some kind of stimulant (legal, because I'm a pussy) since I've seen those things recommended here recently. I also need to get into the habit of posting every day, rather than waiting several months and then dropping a text wall on y'all.

 

Anyway, that's my "progress" thus far.

 

Derpy and [Nameless Tulpa] out.

[Luminesce]

Heh, I was wondering how long it'd take to see a Judy tulpa, in form at least. Since you haven't seen the movie, I highly approve. Good visual personality and cute. She's otherwise annoyingly popular though.

 

As a fellow get-distracted-and-spend-no-time-with-tulpas-ever-er, I would recommend setting aside time, yeah. Passive narration is not as good as sitting down and just talking to them. And although I like to talk to mine when I'm going to sleep (they're 7 years old, we aren't exactly forcing), I do tend to get distracted and eventually fall asleep. I mean, even if I don't fall asleep, my thoughts go to stupid things. So definitely make some time.

[Vos]

I'm pretty surprised that I haven't seen more Zootopia forms in the community at this point. Judy is pretty cute and I'd imagine that the size would make visualization a bit easier, so that's a good choice on your part. Those pony forms can be pretty difficult (mostly for the walk cycles, it seems) and I think I've seen a few threads where people complained about it, but we don't see those too often with that fandom dying out.

[Punch]

Yeah, the fandom is dying out and that's part of my motivation for wanting my tulpa to have a pony form. It's something that was a big part of my life for a while, and even though I'm not as into it now, the characters meant a lot to me, and I guess that factored into my desire for a pony tulpa. Which is a terrible reason to pick a form, so I'm glad it didn't work out because of that.

 

With her current form I have zero expectations for how she should act, so I'm hoping she doesn't feel burdened by the Ghost of Fandoms Past. I'm thinking I'll avoid watching Zootopia altogether, or at least avoid it until she's further along and I can be sure it's not going to effect her development.

[Punch]

So I suck at narration. I mean, I really, really suck. I have a terrible attention span and I try to direct thoughts at Judy, and then I get distracted and start thinking 90 miles a minute about something else. I always frame my internal monolog as a sort of one-sided conversation, but when I try to actually direct it at my tulpa, it becomes hard somehow. Partially it's because my attention span is crap, and partially it's because talking about mundane things to nobody in particular feels fine, but when I start thinking of it as talking to somebody else I feel awkard, and I imagine Judy getting bored and wishing I'd shut up.

 

So in light of that, I started sending her imaginary "text messages" during the day, rather than trying to narrate as a stream of thought. It's not perfect, but it feels less awkward, possibly because I interact mostly online or via text with friends and family, so it feels more natural. Still hoping to get a "text" back from her, but so far no luck.

 

Also, I'm sticking with "Judy" for right now, I'm not crazy about it, honestly, but it's better than calling her "Hey you." and I haven't thought of another name I like.

 

Derpy and Judy out.

[ArchdiAngelo]

So I suck at narration. I mean, I really, really suck. I have a terrible attention span and I try to direct thoughts at Judy, and then I get distracted and start thinking 90 miles a minute about something else. I always frame my internal monolog as a sort of one-sided conversation, but when I try to actually direct it at my tulpa, it becomes hard somehow. Partially it's because my attention span is crap, and partially it's because talking about mundane things to nobody in particular feels fine, but when I start thinking of it as talking to somebody else I feel awkard, and I imagine Judy getting bored and wishing I'd shut up.

 

I hear you on that. Narration isn't my strongest suit either. But a way I get around it is that I don't direct each and every thought of narration towards my tulpae, I just direct a thought towards them to get their attention, and then just read whatever I'm narrating to them as if they're listening. It helps me with the narration itself, though jury's still out on whether it affects the quality of the narration in regards to the process. You could try that if you think it'll do anything. Just a suggestion, good luck with everything!