Pronouns: Single or Plural?

[Drakaina]

I've been having a confusing problem I'm pretty sure that is no right answer for, but my mind locks up and doesn't know which way to go with it. So I thought I'd just ask the community.

 

When you talk about yourself or make comments to your tulpa about something you did using your body, do you refer to yourself as "I" or do you include your tulpa and say "we"?

 

For example, I got home from a night at my grandma's today and I made a comment to Isa, I said, "We're home." But then I did a kind of mental stutter/double take and thought, Isa didn't technically go anywhere, her home is the wonderland, which obviously goes where I do.

It also trips me up when talking about my body. I don't know whether to call it "my" body, or "our" body anymore.

 

So how do others here handle it? Do you say "my body" or "our body"? Do you refer to places you go and things you do as "we" or "I"? And why do you use what you do?

[SomethingDire]

I've read about tulpamancers who say that they and their tulpas have equal rights on the body, but I've also read about tulpamancers who don't associate their bodies with their tulpas at all. So it's up to you and Isa, really. Does she want to share the body with you? Would she like to be associated with it? Asking these questions would help you two to come to an agreement.

[Luminesce]

Changes based on context. If you specifically did something, then it was you. But if what you did could apply to your tulpas too, such as coming home, we works. Tewi said that she uses "I" while switched for events from while I was the one in control because "I have the memories and knowledge, so there's no reason to differentiate". But, contextually, she only does this in our own system and not in talking to others, or tries to. Similarly I say "I" when talking about something that only applies to me, and "we" or "us" when referring to collective experience, as in most discussions on tulpamancy. My tulpas will almost exclusively use we/us while switched.

[yenu]

We use "we" as in "We're home", but it isn't necessarily always connected to tulpamancy, I guess I would still say it sometimes even if I had no tulpas. It's a speech pattern.

 

That said, when I refer to me or my body I sometimes use "we" and "our", sometimes not... before I started writing this post I thought it was more clear, but actually, it seems to be pretty random. I refer to decision I make as "my" decision, but it's "us" that's enacting them, in a way, even if it's mostly me as host. Maybe I'm overthinking, maybe it is just a fact that the language we use didn't particularly evolve to convey things like tulpas.

[Guest Anonymous]

If I remember correctly, there was a thread exactly like this before.

In case I'm right, merging them might be a decent idea.

 

Also, I don't understand the question.

It's like with any other set of one, two or more people.

I say "I" when it's just about me, and "we" when it also involves Esterina.

Not exactly sure how the answer could logically be anything else but this.

 

 

Greets,

AG

[Drakaina]

@AG

I did a search but didn't see one, not with the keywords I used anyway. :P

 

It becomes confusing because with a tulpa your mind and (in the case of people who practice switching and possession) your body aren't just yours. Decisions I make may have an affect on my tulpa. If I decide to go to a movie, even if I made the decision and I run the body, my tulpa still comes along. A tulpa may not always have a say, or an opinion in what the host does, but still gets dragged along because of the nature of their existence. It's not like doing things with a physical person, a tulpa can check out and go do something else in your mind world, but they live in your brain, so at the same time they're still there too. :P

 

@Yenu

You just vocalised my exact problem. XD

My pronouns are inconsistent too, if I use "I" then I trip up and thing "Oh but, Isa's here too",because as a thought form she's always with me; but using "we" doesn't seem to feel quite right either.

[LifeInside]

Well, it depends on the person. I'd usually suggest doing what feels right, but it looks like you don't know what feels right, do you?

 

However, first, we have this:

 

So it's up to you and Isa, really. Does she want to share the body with you? Would she like to be associated with it? Asking these questions would help you two to come to an agreement.

 

Then, this:

 

Changes based on context. If you specifically did something, then it was you. But if what you did could apply to your tulpas too, such as coming home, we works.

 

AGGuy said something similar to Luminesce's post, so that too.

 

And, finally:

 

We use "we" as in "We're home", but it isn't necessarily always connected to tulpamancy, I guess I would still say it sometimes even if I had no tulpas. It's a speech pattern.

 

Yeah, sometimes it's a speech pattern; the way your mind thinks.

 

It becomes confusing because with a tulpa your mind and (in the case of people who practice switching and possession) your body aren't just yours. Decisions I make may have an affect on my tulpa. If I decide to go to a movie, even if I made the decision and I run the body, my tulpa still comes along. A tulpa may not always have a say, or an opinion in what the host does, but still gets dragged along because of the nature of their existence. It's not like doing things with a physical person, a tulpa can check out and go do something else in your mind world, but they live in your brain, so at the same time they're still there too. :P

 

I see your point here. You may be the one who makes the decisions, generally, so it's weird to include Isa when you're talking about it. Still, even if she didn't have a say, if you went somewhere, she went with you as well. And she probably experienced the same as you (saw, heard, etc, the same) too. So, why wouldn't you use "we" in cases like this?

Unless you knew for a fact that Isa was, for example, doing her stuff in wonderland, and she wasn't paying attention at all, then it'd make sense to say that it was only you.

 

Then, the body? Well, I'd probably quote SomethingDire again, here.

Seren's developing yet, so I can't talk about this with her, but yet, somehow, I don't really think we'll always be sharing the body (unless she wants it that way).

Still, when I'm narrating and, for example, describing how delicious was lunch, I usually talk about what we ate. However, that's probably because of the fact that I like having Seren taste food.

 

And then, you have those occasions when you're the only one who's doing something. For example, write a book in which your tulpa doesn't contribute at all.

 

But again, yeah, it's up to you. Everything I wrote is the way I see it.

And maybe, even after reading our feedback, you'll still feel unsure about this whole pronouns thing. I believe you'll eventually solve this/find what feels right for you two.

 

I'm not sure if this has helped you at all, but I do hope it did.

[Carpenter]

For now I use singular pronouns because Chell's communication is lacking and I don't want to speak for her. Even if it's something seemingly obvious like "I went to the movies" it feels wrong to say "we" when she has no say.