ohItsMatt April 18, 2021 Share April 18, 2021 (edited) The following discussion was split from a thread discussing intrusive thoughts. If you would like to see that thread, please go here. -Ranger I don't remember much from "'the good ole days" (although I have many screen and logs stored) but all I can tell you is that the community has changed a fair bit. Back in 2013/2014 I was young, very young, naive and inexperienced. Cheryl was super young as well and the community kinda had its own set of ideas and beliefs that were tried and tested (like counting hours, the orange juice thing and more) and being new at this my whole idea was to "listen and see what happens" on pretty much everything. So when the whole drama debacle happened where Link was having a suicidal breakdown every 12 hours or so I was honestly intrigued by it although I had no idea about what to do or how to help. That led to some interesting situations. 8 years later (wow) the community is changed. A LOT. I'd like to think "for worse" because now plurals, did, tulpas and schizos are essentially the same thing, the community (especially on reddit) is a mishmash of broken and abstract concepts and the "veteran 'mancers" are long gone (except a very select few, secluded in an irc channel that has 2 messages per hour at best) It's safe to say now that I have experience now, I have been with my tulpa for over 8 years (approaching 9, as she likes to remind me from time to time) and I tend to agree with you, but on a broader scale. Nowadays walk ins are considered as tulpas. Intrusive thoughts can be easily mistaken for new "brain demons" and generally, everyone is super flexible and relaxed on the terminology. The concept of possession and switching as we knew it is long gone, there's "fronting" now (which is a plurals thing, it's larping meets proxying essentially), now if you have a tulpa you're a "system" and the whole part of the journey that required self-discovery and passion is frowned upon. The community has become the parody of itself. I remember in 2014 asking (back when I had my own tumblr blog as well) what was the difference between did and tulpas - I was put at stake and burned like a heretic and a madman for even bringing up the discussion. They were two very separate things, and now its just a mix of everything. So this is what I mean when I say that I agree with you on a broader spectrum. Intrusive thoughts are not tulpas. Plurals are not tulpas. Imaginary friends are not tulpas. If I work on a club for 12 hours straight listening to edm at unsafe volumes and when I come home and I close my eyes I still hear Bangarang it does NOT mean that I have just created a walk-in tulpa of Skrillex. (True story) Cheryl wouldn't let that happen anyways :P Much like when I see those going "oh uhh I had this imaginary friend when I was 8 and he spoke so ummm.. tulpa????" I kinda groan and wish they knew better, but sadly now I am in the minority. I get downvoted to oblivion and generally hated on because I bring concepts and ideas that feel prehistoric. Why would you even want to learn to meditate, study the method of loci, learn how the brain works and experiment with the limits of the mind with a strong companion when you can just front with your cute 2 day old tulpa that is already "fully sentient" (lol)? Idk, its a lot of rambly stuff from a boomer host at 5AM Send me a private message on here if you wanna reconnect (maybe on discord idk), would be fun to chat a bit. EDIT: ALSO I rambled so much that I compeltely forgot to write what I wanted to say about the main topic. After many years I've learned that pretty much all of the things related to the mind are symbolic. I even wrote a guide about it (which you can find on my profile) which greatly boils down and simplifies everything there is to know about tulpas into one concept: everything is symbolic. Doubt and Intrusive Thoughts are a diabolic combo - trust me, I've been there. I don't really feel going into much details in public but for a couple years I didn't trust Cheryl, at all. I thought it was all me, that I was roleplaying. I didn't trust a word she said and the fact that I had people with apparent success in front of me constantly (back when I was on IRC) was even worse. The thing that made me change my mind was this: (Again, I'll omit most of the details for reasons), For a while I was heavily invested into a certain concept. A trope, if you will - kinda like the "big bad" or the "plot armor" in movies, tv shows, anime and books. This trope that I really liked in a way helped me feel better on a mental level, and it was all good and dandy until one day, while randomly thinking about stuff, an IDEA came to my head: "What if this trope attacked Cheryl?" And this happened on the worst timing possible, because I had just done some heavy research into it and I had a pretty solid grasp of what and how it could happen. So that same day after I had this idea I had a sugar crash while doing the groceries at the supermarked, and being the hyperactive adhd fuck that I am I IMMEDIATELY attributed it to the "idea" I just came up with. It was a disaster. For months I had this "intrusive idea" floating in my head about this trope attacking my tulpa, whereas nothing really was happening. I had panic attacks, I couldn't sleep at night sometimes - I think I came this close from developing real, hurtful schizophrenia. From her perspective, everything was normal. She says that in those situations she saw me panicking and being terrorized over something that wasn't really happening. A tulpamancer with 5 years of experience was being brought down to its knees by an intrusive idea. Eventually she tooks matters into her own hand and at night she would "calm me down" by doing what I think is literal psychiatric therapy. She took me to the wonderland and by talking and explaining and cross referencing with many things of the past she would usually "dismantle" this idea, that would calm me down for the night until I fell asleep. That's when I learned that she is very real. She would calmly address the situation and explain things to me at times where I had nowhere the mental state to even think about pretending to be her. Over the years she developed this "analytical nature" which she still uses from time to time to help me get over certain situations. She kinda saved me from mental breakdowns a couple times, and she regularly saves me from car crashes by calling me a "somaro" when I use the phone or distract myself while driving. The concept of tulpas (the real ones) is a beautiful thing, and I wish we could go back to what it once was. Edited April 30, 2021 by Ranger Forgot a piece -Matt; Added link for context -Ranger This is why I'm not posting anymore, freedom of speech is a lie. Get in line or get shot. Join my Discord server , old-style tulpamancing / lucid dreaming / meta, newcomers welcome! (and discussion encouraged) -------------------------------------------------------------------- [My Guide] | [Useful #1] [Useful #2] |  Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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