= Oguigi 内儀 & Koomer - The Diary =

[Semi-Nomadic]

Um, do you mean that you decided to give up, stop fighting and surrender your life over to the hostile entities?

[Oguigi]

Um, do you mean that you decided to give up, stop fighting and surrender your life over to the hostile entities?

 

No, And am glad to see that you're still here. You're one of my earliest subscribers =)

 

This isn't surrendering, It's not nearly as bad as it was six months ago. what am doing is going about it a different way, since the way i was going before was not very effective.

[Oguigi]

- Day 569 -

Back to Self.

 

 

 

Hey guys, Am still around.

 

I have been very hard at work, restoring myself to a state of balance.

 

I’ve been fighting for months, And i’ve became stronger and wiser for it. The war is not quite over yet, But the end is now with in sight.

 

The time I’ve been able to use and control my own Body has been increasing, Am able to do more things. Am able to resist the negative influences.

 

Sometimes They still get the best of me, But I try to learn from it. and fight longer and harder the next time.

 

Oguigi is STILL around, And I can still talk to her. We did a test, to see if see can still possess me, she can’t. Mostly due to me than her. This is actually good news, because possession is one thing am trying to undo with myself.

 

 

Oh yeah, Update on Day 531, the "give peace get peace" stuff didn't work out. Am fighting for 100% control all the time, Am no longer settling for anything less.

 

 

Until next time.

[Bin]

This may sound insensitive but do you think you're having so much trouble with these entities because you're taking this a little too seriously?

I mean, the only reason those entities can do anything is because you're the one who gives them power. Seeing them as a threat makes them a threat.

I think the best way to "undo" your ability to be possessed is to just pass it off as being crazy or something and being done with it. Devalue it.

[Oguigi]

- Day 579 -

Finding myself again

 

"Koomer" is not really me, it may sound a bit strange but just hang in there.

 

I think what “Koomer” is, is just one part of me. I think the person am really am is actually a mixture of everything, Both the good and the bad.

 

Koomer, is like my “Good” Self, Every since the first or Second week doing tulpamancy I’ve identified my Consciousness as him.

 

The problem is that my “bad” self, can no longer be expressed. And Pressure starts to build. My Good self trys to fight back, under the illusion that it had to protect itself from the “Bad” self, and before you know it am at war with myself. The good self cannot hold on control forever, eventually feelings and emotions floods over. And before you know it. am doing drugs and such.

 

This week i’ve tried something new, I relaxed. I stopped worrying about the good and the bad. and i just try to go back to my natural state.

 

Am quite aware that i screwed up badly with tulpamancy, My main problems came with possession. I lost my identity, That’s the main reason why i could not stop it, Because i forgot what my true self was, the whole situation was like quicksand. But now I think am closer to returning to my true self then ever before, wish me luck, and pray that am not wrong.

[Oguigi]

- Day 613 -

One step onwards

 

 

 

Alright, another update.

 

I have gained a good amount of weight, am back to normal. Now i need to slow down on my diet and focus of healthier foods, I’ve also tried to exercise some, it’s not quite a habit yet but I’ve been doing it more often then ever.

 

I also been experimenting with some supplements to treat depression/anxiety (also been drinking tons of orange juice and eating chocolate). They seem to improve my overall mood in the day, I feel closer to my old self then ever before.Their might be some risk by taking supplements, I don’t want to be depended on them.

 

The control i have over my body has been increasing, which is great news. But being too lazy will have me lose control of myself, so staying outdoors and active is key.

 

My Tulpa has been in a dormant state, her influence fades. I feel like Oguigi is reversing back to an idea, a thought, and not an actual entity. But i can still talk to her, it’s kinda hard now, and when i do i can literally feel blood pumping to a certain area of my brain as if to resurrect something. If i wanted to i could have her back in a few days. but i no longer have the desire nor interest to do that.

 

until next time.

[Brassow]

It appears we are soon going to lose another tulpamancer. *plays taps*

[Semi-Nomadic]

Better to lose a tulpa than to lose your sanity.

[KruegerMeister]

Sorry if any of this is offensive/insensitive.

I thought you were "that guy who permanently switched with his tulpa" and came here to ask why. I read the most recent posts, and now I feel bad for thinking that.

The most my tulpa and I are doing now is possession, because I didn't want to go down the road to switching, permanent switching, possible host death/"egocide", etc.. Do you have any thoughts on this?

[Oguigi]

Sorry if any of this is offensive/insensitive.

I thought you were "that guy who permanently switched with his tulpa" and came here to ask why. I read the most recent posts, and now I feel bad for thinking that.

The most my tulpa and I are doing now is possession, because I didn't want to go down the road to switching, permanent switching, possible host death/"egocide", etc.. Do you have any thoughts on this?

 

Yeah, I would not go down the road to switching. If you go down that path you can lose yourself and your identity (i was half way there and i suffered). Switching can kinda cloud your judgment and lead you to do some relatively destructive things to your mind just so you can achieve this ultimate goal. If you really want to experience things that are out of this world, try training with lucid dreaming and astra projection. tulpamancy kinda interferes with your waking physical life, and am very sure that most people don't need this. Deep inside you already know everything you need to do, you don't need a second, third or any voice to tell you that.

 

Oh yeah, and try not to lose control over your whole body and such, otherwise your gonna have a bad time. hope i answered your question.