2 smokes

[corytrevor]

Had one day towards the beginning of week where everything seemed to be going to really well. I have no idea what made it any different and every other day has been like normal.

 

Hour of forcing each day except

 

One day we only forced for half hour for the first time since may. I over slept by two hours and forty minutes and only got up when someone called looking for me. I need one of those tulpa alarms that everybody raves about

[TulpaCouple]

Hahaha, I need one of those tulpa alarms too. Too bad our tulpae don't seem to have that function. Luke isn't too good at keeping time and Jaden oversleeps more than I do!

 

Glad you had such a good day. I say keep it up. Have you ever tried passive forcing? It might help keep you going and get a lot of progress done throughout the day.

[corytrevor]

Have you ever tried passive forcing? It might help keep you going and get a lot of progress done throughout the day.

I tried doing this:

Im trying to start treating narration more like forcing sessions, only my eyes happen to be open and I just happen to be doing other things at the same time.

Im not sure if thats passive forcing or not.

 

But we're done anyway I decided to quit forcing today

Im crying too much to type this out so maybe later just thanks to everyone who offered help and encouragement

I can pull my shit together Im going to have to for work anyway

Thanks to Kate, Sands and Roswell, GraffnTrix, TOG, Fede, Mongoose, Raetin, Fourfiction, Sock, Bluesleeve, Virgil, Chupi, Mercurial, Mercurial, Sheep LI and everyone else here

[Sock]

This...is sad. I'm not quite sure what to say to comfort you, or if comforting you is actually a good idea at all. I'm not going to chew you out and grind you into the mud, since I don't think that'll help you any at all. All I can do in this situation, is urge you to come back to it when you're in better mind, and tell you some things I did, and give you a few suggestion based on what I've read:

 

First thing's first, I do see you comparing your progress to other's. Don't do this. It's literally nothing but tulpa poison. This brings me to my next point: I was outrageously lax with the process. I stopped counting hours early, mainly because I didn't see much point in them. In fact, I spent much MUCH more time idling chit chatting at Midori about random things than I did actually sitting down and forcing. From my own experience, the most important part of creation isn't sitting down, meditating, assigning traits, and counting how long you've done it, it's just treating the form as a person. Even if Midori didn't move, I kept chatting with her like she was a new friend I was telling about myself. Even when I didn't get a response, I kept teaching her about what was around me. And the responses I did get? When I was first getting them, they were the most insignificant things you could think of. I didn't get any emotional responses, and the ones I did I didn't recognize. But whenever I felt even the faintest twinge in my head, I focused on that. Not that she wasn't moving, not that she wasn't speaking, just that pressure I always got, because that was the most certain guarantee that she was there. Even when it was small, I'd take it as a positive, and eventually, it got stronger and stronger.

 

I wasted little to no time wondering why my tulpa wasn't progressing that fast (Midori did take a fair amount of time compared to others, as well), why she wasn't talking like other's were (I still can't externally hear her, btw), or why I couldn't tell when she was moving, or when I was puppeting her, I just kept going until she finally got it. In a way, I was like a lighthouse to her, continuously showing her the way until she was able to grasp it.

 

Essentially, the only thing I did was not give up. This may be because I'm incredibly lax about things, and I have faith to spare, but all I really did was keep going. I rarely questioned her, I rarely compared to others, I just kept talking to her like she was my buddy.

 

I'm not sure if you're mentally fit to try again, or if you even want to. I can urge you all I want, but in the end it's all up to you. If there's one thing I learned from this process, it's that it's not this big, complex thing: It's just imagining something and talking to the thing you imagine until it responds. Contrary to popular belief, it doesn't take years of spiritual mastery to imagine something. I say this to let you know that you can start up where you left off at any time. Take some time, regather yourself, and if you really want it, go at it again. That's all I can really tell you. Good luck in whatever path you choose.