Avalanche September 2, 2012 September 2, 2012 Yeah all that forcing and visualising is training your brain to remember dreams better. I've had the same thing happen to me, I get at least 3 or 4 dreams each night. Not 100% sure what's going on but it's certainly something related to forcing. Missing out of a bunch of sessions is only bad if you feel bad. Of course feeling bad is a good thing in order to make you not miss out anymore, but it's only as harmful as you make it out to be. frt
Knapp September 2, 2012 Author September 2, 2012 I'm not gonna take a break for a while, I'd rather force. I don't believe Philip has been harmed in any way in result of me falling asleep, he's probably a lot stronger than I think. Searched last night, no sign of him still. I know he's somewhere, so I'll keep looking. I'm gonna give him until Wednesday when I will try to manually "drag" him back. I think that's plenty of time for him if there's something left he needs to do, plus it's been a whole week since I gave him access. We need to get somewhere, forcing and narrating is harder when I can't feel him. I "remade" the wonderland too, I took the mind-room portal and made it into a temporary heavy "energy" thing, ripped a piece of the wallpaper down (it was sort of electrical in there), it went to the "old" wonderland (the small white room with the TV) and I placed the mind-room portal in there. I removed all of the stuff outside the white room, it's all gone. But if Philip was out there, he wouldn't have been destroyed. So now my current wonderland is the "old" one, it is quite simple in design. The beanbag chair is now dark blue, and the veil in front of the portal has changed into two thin curtains. The TV doesn't work for some reason, gonna have to fix that. The view outside the window appears to be a sunny day, but it's hard to see clearly. I got some tinnitus in my right ear yesterday, it switched on and off rhythmically. He also cured another anxiety attack I had today, it felt sort of like a hug, very warm and reassuring. Name: Philip Age: (7 June, 2012) Form: Male teenage human, light brown hair, green eyes, jeans & hoodie Name: Amalia Age: (15 Dec, 2012) Form: Female teenage fairy, black hair, blue eyes, white dress
Lolimancer September 2, 2012 September 2, 2012 He also cured another anxiety attack I had today, it felt sort of like a hug, very warm and reassuring. Well shit, are you me? It happened the second time to me today, like just now. Pretty sudden, and fits your description too. Yay for tulpamagic.
Pronas September 2, 2012 September 2, 2012 Knapp you should hang out in IRC too, so we can make our circlejerk bigger.
Knapp September 2, 2012 Author September 2, 2012 Well shit, are you me? It happened the second time to me today, like just now. Pretty sudden, and fits your description too. Yay for tulpamagic. Tuppers are the best at comforting<3 Knapp you should hang out in IRC too, so we can make our circlejerk bigger. I would, but I've never used IRC before. It looks so complicated >_> Name: Philip Age: (7 June, 2012) Form: Male teenage human, light brown hair, green eyes, jeans & hoodie Name: Amalia Age: (15 Dec, 2012) Form: Female teenage fairy, black hair, blue eyes, white dress
Knapp September 5, 2012 Author September 5, 2012 The IRC hates me. What did I even do to it? ಠ_ಠ So, forcing and stuff. It's been mediocre I guess. I have been rather busy at school and I've been sick for the past week, so my narration has been a little scarce. Searching for Philip has been tedious, but I've been at it for every forcing session. I'm still crap at internal narration btw. Last night, a small breakthrough was made. I manned up, drank a shitton of OJ and took a cold shower. I had decided that I was gonna find Philip! I started out as normal, relaxing, breathing. I checked the wonderland-room, then inside the portal - he wasn't there. So then I imagined him, his form, his essence and stuff "teleporting" to a spot in front of me, it looked like a small tornado of black smoke. I've tried this before, but it hasn't really worked so great. This time, it sort of did. The smoke formed into Philip, the last known form he had. (No deviation) He seemed... tired? Unresponsive? Or maybe scared? Something along those lines, it was hard to tell. I gave him a hug to test if he was "real", (the other times, the form would deform/distort/disappear or change drastically) and he was. I didn't say much to him, I was just glad he was back. Then I went to bed, as it was a bit late. I've been talking to him since, about the future mostly, but other stuff as well. He is very "quiet", it's not really like him. His presence is there, but it's weaker, and I don't get much pressures/pain. Around the time I noticed that, I started to really ponder on what had happened to him. My conclusion is that maybe he's been lost, or something of the like. I think me falling asleep also may have been unsettling for him. But he's strong, I know this. I won't leave him as he needs me right now. I've also found a new place to be alone and narrate with him, that's good. Tl;dr Philip's back, but he's sad(traumatized?) Name: Philip Age: (7 June, 2012) Form: Male teenage human, light brown hair, green eyes, jeans & hoodie Name: Amalia Age: (15 Dec, 2012) Form: Female teenage fairy, black hair, blue eyes, white dress
Avalanche September 5, 2012 September 5, 2012 I would say he's just weak because you gave him space and accidentally didn't force with him for a while. He wasn't on a magical walkabout through your head, he was there and you just didn't spend time with him. Super duper make up sex is in order. Or make up forcing. Either one. Take pics. pls frt
Knapp September 5, 2012 Author September 5, 2012 Make up sex wouldn't work, he has no ponos. Yet. Name: Philip Age: (7 June, 2012) Form: Male teenage human, light brown hair, green eyes, jeans & hoodie Name: Amalia Age: (15 Dec, 2012) Form: Female teenage fairy, black hair, blue eyes, white dress
Pronas September 6, 2012 September 6, 2012 Keep talking to him and give hugs. He will get better after a while.
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