Lolimancer August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 I don't have quite that bad a problem with visualization, but indeed weird shit tends to naturally happen whenever i visualize. A couple of time my tulpa's eyes turned evil or something. Sometimes i imagined her making a fucking bloodshed, or otherwise acting violent towards me. At those times i asked her if it was actually her doing, and headpressure answered "no". I then continued visualizing as if nothing had happened. Apart from that, i have a lot of problems holding my visualization "still", which means everytime i close my eyes i'm inevitably going to "adventure" rather than "visualize". The thing is, i don't really treat it as an issue or anything, as her form gets to be defined nonetheless - somehow. I don't see any reason to hold your tulpa still at least, since *that* would count as puppeting. Actually, i have a theory: these thoughts are not going to affect your tulpa, since the images you're getting do not involve him personally, but a "copy" your mind has created to temporarily replace him (and making him act off-character in various ways). Even if not true, rationalizing it in this way could probably help i think. Actually, i'd try to act as if he were sentient already if i were you, regardless of the intrusive images and whatnot. Basically, i don't think not having control over visualization is wrong per-se. Maybe try to "visually" make the intrusive thoughts disappear, like throwing shit inside an abyss or whatever floats your boat, and leave it at that. In general, try not to fear what your subconscious could end up showing you. This is just a half-assed suggestion from a newbie, but you never know, it might help or something.
Kiahdaj August 25, 2012 Author August 25, 2012 I see what you mean about it not actually being the tulpa, and being more of a copy. I guess the only real worry left is that he somehow thought that's what I wanted of him, as ridiculous as that sounds. I mean, I'm sure he realizes it's not, and I mention that occasionally. My mind seems to be my enemy. When, even for a second, the thought of the image distorting enters my mind; whether it be my attempt to keep it from happening, or just a stray thought, my mind makes it happen. And if it makes him distort out of nowhere, preventing distortion is now on my mind, and my mind distorts more. It's pretty annoying. Another annoyance I have is that... Some people have found that asking their tulpa to, say, walk around is one way they've seen them preform their first movement. Well, if I ever make a suggestion like that, my mind makes him do what I asked, no matter what it is. So I honestly can't prevent puppeting, at this point. My mind is in primary control over what I visualize. And then there's the worry that if I try too hard, I'll be forcing him to stay still, against his will.. This whole visualization thing is very frustrating for me... "If this can be avoided, it should. If it can't, then it would be better if it could be. If it happened and you're thinking back to it, try and think back further. Try not to avoid it with your mind. If any of this is possible, it may be helpful. If not, it won't be."
GAD August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 When I used to visualize for long periods of time, I ended up getting more and more intruding thoughts all the time. Right now I've cut down a bit on how long we're forcing. Whenever I get intruding thoughts, or weird shit happening, I just open my eyes, forget about the forcing, just for a second or two, and then go back. It seems to completely get rid of the intruding thoughts (especially the unpleasant ones) and lets you get back to forcing more quickly, instead of trying to fight the intruding thoughts off.
Oguigi August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 it would be very helpful if we can get sands input of this pix: Link Diary: http://ponystasha.tumblr.com Koomer.
Virgil August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 Try visualising with the eyes open. It could work by keeping a part of your mind distracted by a sensory input. If that fails, which it probably will, since your case seems especially severe, try this: Pick your favourite relaxation method; I suggest one of the many meditation techniques that don't require one to visualise anything. Visualise simple objects, initially just one, and gradually increase their complexity and number. If anything funny starts happening to them, disregard them and imagine another set of identical objects overlying the affected ones or clear your field of vision if you can and visualise them again. If you have no problem visualising most objects, but it's people that get distorted, try this technique with visualising people instead. But if that's the case, you'll probably not have much luck. It's important to remain calm and avert frustration. If that fails as well, improvise. Actively seek new ways to improve the techniques. Occasionally, try to visualise your tulpa during your forcing sessions and see whether it's getting better. It may take a couple of weeks before you notice some results. If even that doesn't ameliorate the problem, consider this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OCD#Management Bayesian inference
NED August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 It seems everyone in the main visualisation stage gets intrusive thoughts that can be screamer/scary, even me. I hated them. They simply go away after you perfect your concentration. Just ignore them. if they happen just open your eyes and stop forcing for a few seconds and remain calm. Name - Silver Form - Harpy Sentience - fully sentient Personality - Playful, cheerful, enthusiastic, chilled Smell - Baileys Stage - Narration and imposition
Charles August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 In my experience, intrusive thoughts are nothing more than distractions and the tulpa does not experience them. Avoid trying to push them out of your head, but also don't give them any attention. Try to focus on controlling your body in wonderland (first-person, of course), which deepens concentration and makes visualization more stable and vivid. Don't give up on visualizing, as it'll be about as difficult as it is now if you choose to start later. And keep in mind that the various steps of tulpaforcing often have a synergistic effect, that is to say the combination is greater than the sum of its parts*. Neglecting any one component (with the potential exception of personality) can slow progress quite a bit. *This is virtually impossible to test properly, so take my statement with a grain of salt.
Kiahdaj August 25, 2012 Author August 25, 2012 Thank you all for the responses. Virgil, I haven't taken a great amount of time, but it appears that open-eye visualization yields almost no distortions, from what I can tell. Looking back, I don't think I've had the problem with open-eye, and I tried it just now for a few seconds, and it seemed extremely stable. I think I will try this out. "If this can be avoided, it should. If it can't, then it would be better if it could be. If it happened and you're thinking back to it, try and think back further. Try not to avoid it with your mind. If any of this is possible, it may be helpful. If not, it won't be."
Starsaver August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 Oh, so it's not so uncommon. Do they get stronger if you concentrate much? What happens, if you just imagine your tulpa near, daydreaming? I found it's often happens then i overconcentrate, or then i'm "overclocked", like rised heartrate and fast thinking about new and new things. But if i let tulpa's representation just be in daydream state, she calmy idling for herself, and seems fine. But even in this state, but realy rarely, some unwanted happens. I just rewind time and undo these things so they stop exist, and no harm was made. Yet, i scrapped meditative forcing too, just trying to establish reliable contact, we always can polish the form later together. Also, i say it's usefull to think that representation is only a model, designed to be controlled by your tulpa, but sometimes other crap steals it controls - it can't translate actual harm to tulpa, nor perfectly represent personality, so you just learn to stop worry about it, and know that only ideal outcome will be the true one. You can fix everything, only conscious willed actions counts in affecting something, try this. I also suggest to try taking a break for few minutes and just think about something other, that will draw all your attention, so you completely replace your current RAM with other thoughts, and continue then you feel refreshed.
Pashoo August 25, 2012 August 25, 2012 Most errant thoughts happened for me when I first started, and I didn't have a good idea of what I was visualizing and the images were all sorts of messed up. It eventually went away, with practice, and at this point I can tell the difference between what is possibly a deviation, and what is my mind screwing with me. Usually, the deviations are just subtle changes, and they sometimes change back to what they originally were, but when my mind's eye refuses to cooperate, I can tell because what I visualize starts feeling uncomfortable rather than coming easily. When stuff like that happens, I just do what GAD. does, just break the visualization for a moment, then get right back to it. An abstract, all-encompassing love is still a love, nonetheless.
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