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KM & RD


KruegerMeister

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8/9/15: I have some trouble with short-term memory, and asked my tulpas if they'd remember tulpa-related stuff for me. I went to a political rally, during which Fluttershy possessed me. This faded, and then Sarah possessed me for a while.

Later, I had RD hypnotize me so I'd be on my phone less, which would give me that many more chances to socialize face-to-face.

 

[i just had a thought, Keystroke.]

 

{*in catboy!Ed form* Yeah?}

 

[That form you're in...that's motivation for Krueger to work on the DIY project for you, but I kinda feel like it's be better if he did it for himself, too.]

 

{He's (also) doing it for YOU!}

 

[...Touché.]

 

{:3}

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Thanks! Is there anything you don't like?

 

Nope :) I just enjoy the way you do things and felt like saying so!

Cheers!

What I'm about to say is going to blow your mind

I'm creating a being inside my head and her name is Sasha

 

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8/10/15: I went on a hike. Fluttershy perched on my outstretched arm to help me balance when the path got steep. I imagined RD singing "Defying Gravity". I told her she was awesome, and caught myself thinking of her as "Mistress". She said this meant I was in the mood for pet hypnosis. I let her hypnotize me for a bit.


8/11/15: I had abdominal cramps. Keystroke suggested it was conversion disorder, because I was waiting for a Fullmetal Alchemist fanfic, wherein a character brought back from the dead experiences pain between his waist and ribcage as a result of missing innards, to update. Yesterday, I acknowledged that I was generally cowardly; today, I theorized that the abdominal pain may have stemmed from this admission of "gutless"ness.

 

[That seems like woo, which I don't like, but opinion doesn't really have an effect on fact.]

 

*later*

 

{Okay, so the abdominal stuff is gone now. Imma say it was stress-induced; over-focusing on that Skyrim Argonian.}

 

I thought about checking out the wonderland, but I hit a wall: I'm super used to the idea of a house having at least one bathroom, but my tulpas--annnnd, mental block again -.-. Societal taboo against talking about that sort of thing.

 

[it's this whole thing about a room without a purpose, that's just there. Krueger's been playing too much Sims 2, basically. -.- Even though he hasn't played that game in a few years.]

 

{...You can talk about controversial procedures, but not about going to the bathroom or lack thereof. -.-}

 

Keystroke rambled a bit in a hypothetical chat with my parents, before telling me that I hadn't visually imposed him in a while.

 

{Then again, I don't think there've been that many opportunities.

*notices that the previous sentence was accompanied by mental images of him*

...8D.}

 

[You're probly overthinking it.]

 

{Then again, I have been in that Ed form a lot...}

 

[The reminder lost its effectiveness.]

 

Keystroke used British English lingo to express his anger at that loss. I hesitated to type it.

 

{Because you're worried about my superficial accent offending people who're actually British; why do you worry so much?}


8/12/15: I've been doing lots of research into the lore of Skyrim; Shou said that's a good trait for a writer to have.

 

+Because tenacity.+

 

I was about to use a mirror in my house for visual imposition, when Rainbow Dash noticed that it was dark outside--

 

[And thus the house was dimly lit by streetlights and stuff.]

 

--and dared me to do Bloody Mary.

 

[bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, B--]

 

^--eetlejuice :p ^

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8/13/15: RD thanked me for trying new stuff when I are a slice of bread with goat cheese on it. I thought about using a passage from a book in Skyrim to segue into vocal possession. Nina possessed me and ate a steak. For some reason, I looked up "skyrim nightmare fuel" before bed. Sarah positioned herself next to my bed. When I held out my hand, she licked it.


8/14/15: I woke up at 6:00AM, and I had trouble getting back to sleep. I moved to a different room.

 

[i imposed myself on the chair in the other room. I'm pretty sure it worked cuz he was expecting it to.]

 

She laid on top of me. We planned to use hypnosis to put me to sleep, but I got sidetracked by reading the tulpa subreddit. Dash had a brief crisis when she read that modern tulpamancy was a bastardization of the Tibetan version.

 

[And that it was just a minor, tiny thing. Cognitive dissonance, basically.]

 

Later that night, I looked in a mirror and saw Hermaeus Mora's big double-pupil'ed eyeball in the reflection of a window. I looked at the actual window, and it was just Shou in disguise.

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8/15/15: I forgot to log stuff. When I went outside and my friend showed me the Little Dipper, Rainbow Dash connected the stars with a rainbow trail/streak. I had trouble falling asleep, so RD hypnotized me.

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8/16/15: I googled stuff about using hypnosis to fall asleep. When I noticed one of the results was an app, Fluttershy said "There's an app for that.". Rainbow Dash said "There's a tulpa for that - me.". When my uncle highfived me, Shou highfived him back. Later, I found the Slenderdash pic. It didn't faze me, and Sarah asked how I'd feel about her changing back. Nina said that she preferred Sarah's current form. I imagined myself talking to a friend about a controversial issue. In this conversation, I came off as similar to the misconception of an atheist who hates god, or who lost their faith due to a tragedy. I realized that my tone seemed similar to the crazy/giddy/impassioned tone Shou Tucker used in episode 7 of the original Fullmetal Alchemist--

 

+Both versions (2003 and 2009) are pretty much the same. Guy does a crazily unethical experiment, succeeds (sort of), then flips out at the success.+

 

--which kinda scared me. Later, Shou offered to possess me and help with the DIY project.

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(edited)

8/18/15: I thought about joining the Thieves' Guild or Dark Brotherhood in Skyrim.

 

[Eh, the Thieves' Guild has cooler/better-looking armor.]

 

I went on a monologue about "a bad experience taught me I couldn't trust anyone except over cyberspace, and my tulpas, because they wouldn't mess with me out of self-preservation". Dash butted in to say "and genuine friendship". I toasted a Poptart and turned on the TV. An episode of American Dad! was on. I thought about working on the DIY project while watching TV and eating, but Dash advised against risking getting hot Poptart filling on it.


8/19/15: I walked into a hallway that was partially lit. Nina entered from a room on my left and walked from the unlit portion to the lit portion. The lighting transition was choppy, so she redid that a few times.

 

Nina: Lol, "times" autocorrects to "Timeskip".

 

Me: I had trouble texting my friend from high school about a controversial topic, so Sarah possessed me and hit "send". The possession faded, and she-repossessed my arms. I asked if she was right-pawed or left-pawed.

 

Sarah: I'm trying to be ambidextrous.

 

[That's pretty cool, Sarah.]

 

Sarah: Thanks, Rainbow Dash :).

 

Me: RD, Keystroke, Fluttershy, and I did some stuff with hypnosis, but I had vague memories of it afterward. It started as one thing, then it turned into us being catpeople, then it turned into RD being three different archetypes.

 

[it was weird, basically. Like how drunk people do funny stuff in movies and TV.]

Edited by KruegerMeister
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8/18/15: I thought about joining the Thieves' Guild or Dark Brotherhood in Skyrim.

 

[Eh, the Thieves' Guild has cooler/better-looking armor.]

 

Nah, Dark Brotherhood every time :) . You get Shadomere and get to perform a certain high level assasination that makes it feel like you are affecting the story a bit. Hail Sithis!

Akecalo - Host

 

Maya - Tulpa

 

Mara - Tulpa

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8/20/15: Rainbow Dash said that my friend's scooter would look cooler with a rainbow trail.

 

[*with southern twang/drawl* Cuz ya gotta admit, flowing things are cool.]

 

Wat.

 

[:p]

 

RD hypnotized me, but we didn't really go anywhere with that.


8/21/15: I asked the 'Meras what the inside of their house looked like.

 

Nina: Ooh, it should have secret passages!

 

Me: I noticed a moving blur inside my computer monitor, and figured it was a bug.

 

{*rimshot*}

 

RD and I talked about the design on her sweatshirt. When my friend took a selfie with me, Nina photobombed us. While watching "American Ultra", I asked my tulpas to remind me to Google "MK ultra pony".

 

[For lolz. Kinda schadenfreude-y lolz, but...if you make that kinda stuff public, people are gonna laugh at fringe/non-mainstream stuff.]

 

{I also did some sparring with Krueger in, like, a warehouse or something. For some reason I sound like Jesse Eisenberg right now.}

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8/22/15: I wondered if Keystroke's accent was offensive, to which he replied by bopping me on the head. I read about the meaning of the word "quite" in British English vs American English (if you say something's "quite good" to a British person, you're saying "it's okay, but it could be better").

 

[You know what? Screw quite. Name one person who uses it in this day and age, aside from me using it in this paragraph, and you using it in the above sentence.]

 

A==| RD responded with something like that, but funnier. We also chatted about why the Doctor has an English accent.

 

{Because he's a Time Lord? The TARDIS has a universal translator.}

 

I read stuff about cultural appropriation. Keystroke started to call cultural appropriators out on their actions, but then he told me "oh, now I see why you're worried about my accent."

 

I pretended to direct a rant at my dad, and then caught myself thinking of Shou as "dad", for a second.

 

+*theorizing* Replacement goldfish cuz you're mad at the real one?+

 

Maybe.


8/23/15: I thought about the "replacement goldfish" thing. RD theorized that the occasional bouts of me thinking like her pet were due to an unconscious feeling of being uncared for (because pets are cared for), which allegedly stemmed from the same event that (theoretically) caused the episodes of me pretending to be Shou's kid.

 

[it's sort of a "theory of everything". Although I'm kinda skeptical of it, myself. Even though I came up with it.]

 

When my friend took a selfie of us, Shou snuck into the shot. I read the most recent chapter of a pony fic I hadn't read in a while, but Dash didn't like how dark it was. She had me work on the DIY project.


8/24/15: I thought about the "silver fire " stuff, and was still amazed at the lack of animosity or anything from the 'Meras. I wondered if it was related to the brief time Shou was questioning whether his existence would cause mental strain. RD remarked (in Tulpish) that "the spark" was the novelty value/awesome feels that came after cool tulpaforcing progress or similar things.

 

[Also, you're trying to get it a lot, right? Well, eventually you'd feel that cool novelty feel from not feeling it. Basically "the spark" is transient by definition.]

 

^I think all the good things in life are.^

 

Nina: We doin' a philosophizing thing?

 

Me: I asked my tulpas what kinda stuff they did when I wasn't around.

 

+Well, I've tried working on origami, but there isn't much for me to extrapolate off of.+

 

Shou possessed me to work on origami. I thought about the time Keystroke had called himself a "professional girlfriend-scouter"; he said that Rainbow Dash and I would be perfect together. I thought I heard my parents talking about my tulpas, but my mom was just talking about her being at her friend's house. I thought my dad followed this up with something about drugs (maybe overhearing me talking to my tulpas and thinking I was doing drugs). Rainbow Dash said that that was ridiculous. I thought about last Thanksgiving, where Nina and Shou decided to have a father/daughter relationship as a way to "spite" their resemblance to fictional chimeras who have a similar relationship.

 

Nina: I don't think "spite" was the right word. It's more like "I'm similar to you, but those similarities bring out our differences".

 

Me: the "Shou's kid" stuff came up again. I said that I wanted to forgive my dad for the thing I was mad about (which I won't mention, because it's controversial); Shou said that I wanted to avoid the "replacement goldfish" thing because it made me uncomfortable. I caught myself calling him "dad" again. I wonder if I should just roll with that for a bit?

 

{Well, it worked when I was Dusk Shine.}

 

^You won't know until you try.^

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