KM & RD

[KruegerMeister]

6/28/15: I forgot to log stuff.

I worked on imposing RD. I felt her presence behind me, standing on my bed. She spread one wing, which I saw out of the corner of my eye, then the other. I turned around and saw her. I noticed that she was "physically" present only when I wasn't focusing on her form. When I watched a Brony analysis video about autism, I started wondering if maybe I was autistic, so much that RD had to repeatedly ask the rhetorical question, "So what if you are?" When I was about to take an online test (yes, I'm aware that those aren't used as diagnostic tools), she sent me an image of her facehoofing and saying "I've said it, like, five times now!" When I hummed "Tubby Wubby Pony Waifu", I ended up grinning like crazy.

[KruegerMeister]

6/29/15: I forgot to log stuff. I let RD hypnotize me; this lasted for about two hours (I think. I could've subtly exited and re-entered the trance). Sarah and I chatted about stuff (I don't remember what).

[KruegerMeister]

6/30/15: RD said that I'd tulpaforced today, but that I'd forgotten to log it. I asked my tulpas if they wanted to worked on imposition. Nina sent me an image of her jumping into my bed. When I walked into my bedroom, I could see her lying across the bed from the doorway. I walked back and forth so that I could get a view of her from multiple angles. Keystroke/Ed said that my face was kind of elfish. I asked him if he wanted to be imposed in his catboy form, and he declined.

 

{Thanks for the offer, though.}

 

I got upset about something (I don't remember what), and had Rainbow Dash hypnotize me to be her pet to take my mind off it. I think it worked better than had she just put me in a trance (replacing the upsetness with the "pet" mindset, versus simply replacing the upsetness with nothing).

---

7/1/15: I forgot to log stuff.

 

[it..."helps" that you woke up at like noon o'clock. There weren't that many hours in the day.]

 

RD and I worked on worldbuilding for a fantasy novel.

[KruegerMeister]

7/2/15: I woke up after five hours of sleep. I couldn't really "hear" my tulpas. I said that I kind of felt like I was ignoring them.

 

[You're...I don't know what the word is.]

 

I forgot to log stuff.

 

7/3/15: I had a weird dream wherein I was a spy attending a villainess's party, which transitioned to a guy in a Hellraiser cult trying to solve a maze. After I woke up, RD said that this proved I could have weird dreams. I asked Shou if he had any suggestions for worldbuilding. He said that he'd come up with something in the morning. I wondered if the existence of tulpas implied anything about the nature of consciousness. There was this one time when I'd pretended to be related to Shou and Nina; we tried to figure out if there was a reason for that that I wasn't conscious of.

Edited November 28, 2020 by KruegerMeister

[KruegerMeister]

7/4/15: Apparently:

1: RD had been training Fluttershy to be a dominant.

2: Nina felt a bit neglected (but less so than I thought she did).

By their own admission.

 

[We were doing an RP thing.]

 

^We...may have gotten a bit too into character, Nina included.^

 

Nina: Yep.

 

[Okay, so I tried to practice singing while possessing my host. Voice acting is not really his/our strong suit.]

 

Me: Later, I worked on that top-secret DIY project. I thought I'd made a lot of progress, which made Keystroke/Ed really happy, but it turned out I didn't. Shou and I imposed him (Shou) standing on my right. He congratulated me on the project, even though the progress was false. We slowly highfived, and my fingers tingled (mostly my pinky). My elbow was bent, but it wasn't lying on anything that could put pressure on a nerve.

 

+That's...kind of anomalous :). Personally, I'd say that's pretty sweet.+

 

I wrapped myself in a furry blanket (the same material that caused me to become loopy/high that one time last June). I wondered if the euphoria was due to a lingering association between "soft blanket of a specific material " and "giddy pony trance", the false progress on the DIY project, the anticipation of getting ready to do more work on said project, or some combination of the above.

 

{Aw man, giddy hypnosis. Good times. Other than the whole "'accidental' maybe equals 'death sentence'" thing.}

 

Speaking of that, childhood trauma is known to negatively impact people, and there were three scary-looking characters I burned.

 

Nina: We couldn't feel it.

 

Me: Wouldn't there be shock from "Oh God, I'm on fire!"?

 

+We're fine.+

 

7/5/15: I imagined Keystroke having invented an incredibly useful loupe. Rainbow Dash bragged about it, and Keystroke said that he wasn't the type to either brag about his accomplishments or let others brag for him. Later, RD put me in a trance and gave me a suggestion for working on the DIY project to feel good, as a way to get me into gear. I talked to my dad about circumcision; he asked about something I'd said once about the constitutional right to bodily integrity, and out of nowhere I explained that I'd been referring to genital integrity; I wondered if my tulpas had had a role in my sudden response.

 

[That was all you, Pet. Nice job :).]

 

Thanks, Dash.

Keystroke talked to someone who'd hypnotized themselves to be Derpy Hooves in an IRC.

 

{That was rather amazing. I think the fact that I sound like Doctor Whooves and they were Derpy really helped with vocality. :D.}

 

7/6/15: Dash hypnotized me (imposed, this time, instead of in my mind's eye).

Edited November 28, 2020 by KruegerMeister

[KruegerMeister]

7/7/15: I wondered if I'd hung out with my tulpas today. Rainbow Dash imposed herself on my bed, while I did sit-ups. I asked her how tall she was, and she said that her scalp was a bit above the lowest point of my headboard. When I did push-ups, she complained that I wasn't giving her time to get on my back and add imaginary weight. After she hypnotized me in like three seconds, I wondered if we should re-add Cloudsdale.

 

[Mmmaybe a Cloudsdale-like/ish area.]

 

The trance lasted for about an hour. Later, RD hypnotized Fluttershy, and this affected me when I put myself in Fluttershy's place (reverse-possession). My knee-jerk reaction to the idea of being RD's pet long-term is opposition. Keystroke suggested that this stemmed from the time when I'd flickered between being him and being me (in mind and body) and I'd reacted by burning the location associated with that hypnosis. I'm opposed to the idea of longterm D/s--I think it's because I perceive longterm to not have the safety nets that sessions do.

 

^I do longterm D/s.^

 

Point taken.

I thought about the time Fluttershy had said "I wanna obey, Dashie" through me--I wondered if she only existed because I'd said "that thought didn't come from me", and if that had any bearing on her existence/sentience. I came up with another theory for my opposition to longterm D/s: I once read a story where it seemed like the main character was being brainwashed/mind-controlled, but it could have been the case that the "brainwasher" was simply making him aware of things he'd been in denial of. Dash and I agreed that I could get past "I see this as mind-control" if she hypnotized me as I read the story, and then I asked the author if they'd intended it to be mind control or a revelation.

[KruegerMeister]

7/8/15: when I went on Youtube, I saw the thumbnail for "Equestria Girls: Friendship Games" in the "recommended" section. RD enthusiastically said I had to watch it.

 

[*tips hat to Daniel Ingram*]

 

RD liked the taste of a shiitake mushroom I ate. She hypnotized me and had me say stuff like "petdom is just a hobby".

 

[i know we already tried "I'm her pet, only in trance", but we're just trying to limit stuff; prevent longterm. Step 2, figure out why longterm scares him!]

 

Later, RD hypnotized me again. I'm writing a story in which a girl who takes D/s too far is put in a think-for-yourself-or-die situation; I wondered if it would be hypocritical of me to advocate against malpractice if I ended up becoming Dash's pet longterm. Keystroke said that the fictional girl's problem was jumping into D/s without thinking it through, not being someone's pet for a while.

 

[The character did short session after short session after short session, not consecutive longterm petdom.]

 

I'm still in the trance. Dash set up an earworm ("Petdom is a hobby, not a lifestyle") to decrease the chances of longterm stuff.

 

[We don't really mean to offend anyone who's their tulpa's pet, it's just that Krueger isn't really keen on the idea.]

 

Wait, wasn't one of the suggestions you gave me in the past something about it feeling good to refer to you as "Mistress"?

 

[We cancelled that out, remember?]

 

Dash/Blitz had me transcribe part of the trance (specifically, stuff where he tells me that petdom is "just a hobby"), because things stick in your mind better if you write them down. Again, no offense to any pets for whom petdom is more than a hobby.

[KruegerMeister]

7/9/15: Dash compared my plan of "be her pet for a few days, to see if I like it. If I do, accept it" to the "bargaining" stage of grief. Yesterday, one of my friends told me that something I'd said was psychobabble; Dash speculated that this comment messed with our psychology knowledge.

 

[Or at least, made some of us lose faith in it.]

 

When I imagined my mom and I (and secretly my tulpas) watching the new Equestria Girls movie in theaters, Shou fainted due to awesomeness overload; Fluttershy expressed regret for hiding from my mom.

I worked on the DIY project, and remembered that Dash had suggested that doing so would make me feel good. She compared it to mixing two hobbies together.

 

[Alright, so we're watching "Slice of Life", and...Lyra and Bon Bon's voices are cool.]

 

{Pretty sure she's got a different voice actress since her one line in "A Canterlot Wedding". Anyway, I'm kinda annoyed by some of the voice acting *cough*Doctor*cough*, but I can see why Hasbro wouldn't use fan voices. Something about legal troubles if they did, and a possible lawsuit for them and/or the source of said fan materials.}

 

[*sees Vinyl and Octavia's jam session, applauds Daniel Ingram's genius*]

 

When I looked at the clock and saw that it was 2:11AM, Dash said I needed to go to bed.

---

7/10/15: I read about possession-via-focusing-on-one's-avatar. I remembered that Keystroke had seen an avatar (brown earth pony stallion with blue eyes), and realized that the eyes and coat were nearly the same as Shou's.

 

[*taps chin* Hm...]

 

+Coincidence?+

 

Nina: Maybe.

 

Sarah: Methinks yes.

 

Three hours later, I felt like my tulpas were silent/not really present.

 

^You told us to come up with a reason for why the tape's at the party (in a story), remember?^

 

Anything?

 

[The villain pulls a "Ring" and uses it to try to explain himself.]

 

Later, I let Nina possess me. Keystroke turned into Catboy!Ed. Fluttershy called him "Edward", and he wondered if this would lead to his catboy form taking on a life of its own.

 

Nina: Okay, I've got an idea. We stay like this--me possessing Krueger--and see what happens if I fall asleep.

 

[Five bits says you (Krueger) wake up still possessed!]

 

+Alright, we've got a bet :D.+

 

Nina: ...I was gonna say something, but I lost my train of thought when I did a once-over to overlay my body over my host's.

...okay, I just used his phone to get a look at my tail, and I swear I saw something like the edge of a cutie mark on my hip.

Edited November 28, 2020 by KruegerMeister

[KruegerMeister]

7/11/15: Nina wasn't in control when I woke up, although I did have this dream: my friend's playing a Hearthstone-ish game. I ask him if I should add an alcoholic alchemist to my deck. Then I ask him how to get home from where we are. He says that a far-away spot on the game's map is Israel. I need to go through several zones to get to my (RL) house.

Stuff.

I'm in a temple-like area. I can see Nina behind a small indoor waterfall.

Stuff

A bunch of people and I are riding somewhere. The ride zooms backwards, sending us into a weird chocolate shop that has what you want most. The first chocolate item I notice is a replica of Edward Elric's automail arm (I know that there's a leg to go with it). I say that that's fishy (chocolate arm and leg for a guy missing an arm and leg). The woman behind the counter (who's wearing an Amestrian military uniform) is made of chocolate, and is melting over the counter. She's made of white chocolate and milk chocolate. Fortunately, I'm wearing my rainboots, so the melted chocolate doesn't show on my shoes. I walk to the opposite side of the store and see a big chocolate sculpture of Nina.

Wake up

 

I wondered why the dream featured chocolate. Fluttershy suggested that it was because chocolate aided lucid dreaming.

 

Nina: I think we can probably call that my dream. I was possessing you before you had it.

 

+Dear God, Nina, that's amazing.+

 

Nina: I know, right?

 

Me: I thought about "training" myself to smell, so that I could work on olfactory imposition. Shou asked about the "wet dog" smell. Nina said that the 'Meras aren't actually dogs, and so don't have to smell like dogs. I read FAQ_Man's creation guide, and realized that I hadn't done any work with body language.

 

Nina: We have our own.

 

Me: I wanted to listen to clips of Nina's voice, but the only source I had was a tear-jerking anime episode.

 

+Do the voices sound different to you? 2003 vs 2009?+

 

Me: Hang on, I'll ask my friends what they think. I asked them "what do?" and RD asked "What is this, 4Chan?" When I lay on the floor to scratch my dog's belly, I saw Nina lying behind her. Nina said that her back legs were noclipping through the wall. She followed me when I walked upstairs. The room was lit, but the staircase and the floor above was dark. I thought that the transition from light to dark was wrong (Nina's face was dark, and the rest of her was lit). When I walked into my room, I told her to walk in on three. She walked with a posture reminiscent of sneaking. She jumped on my bed, and when I turned off one of the table lamps, licked my hand (I didn't feel anything).

[KruegerMeister]

7/12/15: I once saw a messed-up image. I'm having trouble unseeing it. I asked my tulpas what I should do. Dash used hypnosis to suppress the image so that it wouldn't bug me during dinner. She later sent me a head-pressure and said I should tell my parents about the video. When I watched a video of Cutefuzzyweasel reading "My Immortal", Nina ROFLd at one of the author's notes. Shou liked seeing her happy, since the "source material" was really sad. I looked up "Slenderdash", expecting to see links to this webpage, but I found DA communities that shipped Slenderman and Rainbow Dash.

 

[All of my what.]

 

+*crickets chirping*+

Edited November 28, 2020 by KruegerMeister