Ask Lumi's Tulpas

[tulpa001]

Unconditional (or perfect) love does exist, but not at a mortal level. It's a good thing to aspire to though.

 

Everybody has a price, everybody has their limits. Granted, some people have insanely high prices/limits... but they do still have them.

And not every price is paid in money. What would you do to protect the people you loved?

Love is our weak spot, but it is also the source of our strength. A blessing and a curse all rolled into one.

I disagree. My host experiences unconditional love for all things.

 

As she would say, love does not mean you will never act against them. It means you will hate them when they do wrong. She believes it is impossible to hate anything without loving it first. If you do not care about them, then you do not care what they do.

 

Sorry for quoting an old post but it caught my attention o.o I mean this sounds almost exactly like what it feels when I let Desmond take control of my body, and up until now I've just called it full body possession but now I'm not sure anymore? I started to wonder if I'm almost switching without even noticing (I don't want to say that I could be completely switched out because that feels odd and like there should be more to it but now I'm seriously wondering). Do you think that could be possible? .__. We're slightly confused, neither had thought about it before.

That's not full body possession. That's what I call mind possession. It is a thing we sometimes do. We call it dominance switching as well, as some other people call it that.

 

Full body possession is what we usually do. That is where my host rides along in our head, fully conscious, but I am the one in direct control of everything the body does.

 

Switching is again a third thing. That is where YOU are off in the wonderland feeling wonderland things and not sure what is going on with the body.

[CM]

That's not full body possession. That's what I call mind possession. It is a thing we sometimes do. We call it dominance switching as well, as some other people call it that.

 

Full body possession is what we usually do. That is where my host rides along in our head, fully conscious, but I am the one in direct control of everything the body does.

 

Switching is again a third thing. That is where YOU are off in the wonderland feeling wonderland things and not sure what is going on with the body.

 

Yeah that's why I wouldn't call it full switching, because I'm still there. I actually explained it to my tulpamancing acquaintances saying that I allow Desmond's mind to come on top of mine and let him have control :o So yeah dominance switching sounds about right. But at the same time I am there all the time , fully conscious and aware, but I don't interfere (or try not to, sometimes I steal control back to myself by accident because I start to focus on something he's doing and kinda just take it from him eh) while I let him do everything. It feels like possession and makes my muscles go numb after a while, once he pulled my dog's leash back with apparent force but I didn't feel it in my arm which was kinda odd.

I kinda wanna talk about this more because I wanna know what exactly is happening but this is hardly the thread for it I think.

EDIT: Nvm I found a thread and feel reassured that what's up with us is normal, carry on as you were :D

[Luminesce]

Oh please, don't bring even more terms into this. "Mind possession", what does that even mean? Our term for possession has always meant "controlling the body but not the mind". I think what you're referring to is something more complicated/less clean than full switching or possession, and it's certainly not what we do. I don't understand the difference in the terms dominance switching and switching. That sounds much more plural-oriented than tulpa-oriented, like you're at a much closer level to each other in using the mind and body than in the typical host-tulpa relationship.

 

Anyways, like I've said a billion times (over a year ago), my tulpas do not live in the wonderland. They just don't. The wonderland is a place we specifically visit. My tulpas are generally "inactive", as in nowhere. But when they are active, like when I'm talking to them, they kind of occupy a warped 3D/mental space around me. For example most of the time when I talk to one of them my attention is directed to the right side of my head, where mentally they're standing a little away from me but physically I'd place them just inches from my head. We call it mindspace because being vague is less complicated than being specific, lol. My point is, that's their natural living space, not the wonderland.

 

And when we switch, that's where I go. Not the dang wonderland. Never the wonderland. Stop with the wonderland definition of switching, I outright refuse that. ""You don't have to have a wonderland to have a tulpa"" -> ""No you have to go to the wonderland or it's not switching"". I go where my tulpas are. That is the only logical definition for the term switching. Full body possession means the host feels as if their entire body is being controlled for them, but mentally they've not really gone anywhere. Possession is even less, feeling like only your arms or etc. are being controlled for you. We don't do possession, but from what I hear some people feel like they have to "move over" a bit mentally for things like full body possession, which makes sense. But if you're still right there consciously thinking in the mind, you aren't switched. And if you're not, you are.

 

These are tulpa terms. Everyone experiences switching and possession differently, so you can't define the experiences too specifically. Switching should not involve the host going to the wonderland, just the host switching places with their tulpa and vice versa. Requiring the wonderland and continued conscious thought elsewhere is a biased and outdated definition of switching, because not all tulpas live in the wonderland and are thinking all the time. That might've been how it was (supposedly) for most people when the term was created years ago, but it's not now.

[tulpa001]

Anyways. Because of the lack of a clear borderline between "aware" and "distracted/unfocused", I wasn't really scolding myself today like I thought I would be. Moreso taking notes on how it went and what to look out for/how to improve. Which seemed to go strangely well while I was relatively focused on awareness. It's been way too little time to say with any certainty, but it felt like my intuition was a lot stronger during those times. Instant mental maths and other basic problem solving skills, also with less doubt/need for double-checking than I usually have for things like that. For example, I usually do basic math in my head instantly but then double check by actually doing it, but today it felt like I was sure enough I didn't need to. Can't think of specific examples, but I'm talking about things like "Alright, it's 12:47 and I need to check this again in 150 minutes, so 3:17" in various formats.

 

To be honest, this suits me well. It's really what I was aiming for back when I was trying to quiet the mind (to put it lightly) and continuously stop extraneous trains of thought/thought processes, which I've given up trying to explain here. But the problem there was I was focusing on the wordiness of my mind instead of just being aware in general. If that makes sense. Even if it doesn't.

About that stream of consciousness socialisation, my host trained herself out of ever not paying attention while talking, because people start to claim/complain that she acts weird when she does that. She needs to censor herself carefully to blend in.

 

Myself, I'm always trying to multitask, be aware of myself, so I don't fade, be aware of my host, so she doesn't fade, be aware of what I am doing, maintain control of the body, and sometimes listen to a conversation or music.

 

Are you saying most people aren't self aware while talking to other people?

 

Also, how would you say your consciousness differs from most people? Do you think most people get these extraneous thoughts you talk about having and suppressing? Do you think they are aware of them?

 

I am impressed by your dedication, but don't work the others to death. That is counterproductive and stressful for most.

[Luminesce]

(This is the type of post Tewi doesn't like herself making, where I just kind of went on and on. I wouldn't say I went off topic but it sure isn't concise, sorry. She'll be posting again soon.)

 

I'm pretty sure the majority of the internet doesn't think about what they're saying while they're saying it. Unfortunately the same carries over to the real world. But what I'm referring to is just people being stupid, what Tewi's referring to is a whole other level. Being aware of everything you're doing is not common at all. Well, it is, in cases where people actually care about what they're doing and are involved in the process. But definitely everyone I went to high school with was on social autopilot. You asked if we thought they were self aware, but that is way too light a term to use here. Most people are "self aware" to that general level, except really ignorant people and maybe children. The awareness she's talking about is sort of self-referential, awareness of being aware (of your thoughts, and environment etc.), and I haven't specifically made an effort to do that in years. Lucilyn interpreted it differently, and she would consider Tewi's self-awareness to be just another type of awareness, just like you can be aware of what's going on in a game or something. So in that aspect, it's less "universal awareness" and more introspective awareness, being aware of your own thinking and experiencing and such. It's still a really powerful thing IMO, and definitely an uncommon practice outside of meditation and reflection.

 

The extraneous thoughts thing is such an annoying subject. It seems like it should be simple to talk about to us, yet people tend not to get it. I guess they just aren't aware enough of their own thought processes. And sure, I'd bet my life basically everyone has the same perpetual thoughts we do and just lives with them. I mean, in the first place there's no incentive to even try and separate your "self" from your mind, so people are fully identified with all their thoughts and emotions. People with depressive thoughts are large victims of this. But there are tons of what-we-call conscious people who I'd say regulate their thinking pretty well. Good students, good athletes, competitive MLG gamers.. But again, even when they are introspective-ly aware, it's usually only around that single subject they're dealing with. Aside from just people doing well for themselves, I'd say the universal sense of introspective awareness is most common among those who highly value efficiency and time management. Those who take that clear and focused mindset good athletes and test takers have with them in everything they do.

 

No one's to say that's at all necessary, and I think those Olympic athletes can do whatever the heck they want with those paychecks. But I'm personally of the belief that "mindfulness" as it's sometimes called (or is at least a similar concept) can really improve your quality of life.

 

And generally speaking, it's really not an on/off switch. The level of conscious-awareness/mindfulness everyone has in general varies wildly. On the outside most people seem about the same, but on the inside I assure you we all think very differently. Some people are so un-conscious it's surprising they manage to function at all, and some (typically very successful people) are just naturally like that. For me, which I suppose is the default/template mindset my tulpas would have without their own influence, I've always been very observative (I don't know why this word sounded right when it's apparently so "rare", but I chose it over observant), as in I processed everything and thought about stuff a lot. But, I wouldn't say I was naturally conscious/aware. I was very "self-conscious" in a social sense and very "smart" in a makes-observations sense, but looking back I don't feel like I had a very good grasp of my own thought processes. I was really a victim of whatever my mind felt like doing, which for the most part worked out just fine, aside from the major motivation issues that have barely gotten better to this day. It took a lot of learning from people like this through my teens before I took any real control over my mind, making decisions about how I wanted to think and feel. I would say I've definitely raised my default-awareness a ton, because I feel nowhere near as miserable as I used to about existing. I would cautiously say I've risen some levels listed here. Those were actually a guide for me for ages 12-17 or so, but Tewi seems to object to their uniformity and considers them levels humans define rather than levels defining humans.

 

Anyways.. Tewi's more aware than me by default sure, but the All Day Awareness thing is really impressive. She had like no trouble at all keeping that up almost an entire day. I get distracted by not caring due to a lack of motivation, and Lucilyn gets distracted by not considering it worth it. Reisen has her own kind of awareness she keeps up naturally but I don't know if it's that level, and Flandre is again similar to me. Maybe slightly better about the motivation thing. But, she hasn't asked any of us to do what she's doing yet. She suggested Lucilyn try "her own version" of it which was nothing close (just ended up reminding herself to have fun while she played competitive games with my friends), but I butchered whatever progress she was starting to make just fine lol.

 

If she can make it a real habit on her own, I don't think it'll be too much work for us to keep up ourselves. But if none of us can be bothered to do it but her.. She'll have really put herself ahead of me when it comes to general aptitude. For now, I can still work as well as her when I have motivation (such as an unstudied-for test), but I just don't have the strong self-discipline she does. If she relies on that just to exist in daily life I might not be able to keep up.

 

The hope is that her doing it first makes it easier for the rest of us..

[tulpa001]

I'd object to their (levels of consciousness) uniformity as well, on the grounds that those are emotional states, not levels of consciousness. (Except for enlightenment, which sounds like wishful thinking and extrapolation.) But new age stuff often mislabels stuff without getting things wrong, so I'll give it a pass.

 

Mostly based on my host's theory, I'd say this: my host has been surprised by the inattentiveness of those around her, she'd wonder why she was the only one looking at the odd thing happening on the other side of the room. There seems to be a spectrum, here. One may give undivided attention to something. One who has known obsession, real obsession, knows what this is like. This is sharp focus. It is trance like, and causes one to forget everything else, and think of nothing else. What you have been recently pursuing sounds like awareness of everything. My host gets that way when she is trying to concentrate. Instead, she notices everything else. This is blunt focus. It promotes the swarm of undirected thought you seem to be describing as side thoughts. Then there is non-lucid states of consciousness, like sleep. This is unfocused thought. It promotes undirected thought the most.

 

Which state is synonymous with efficiency probably depends on the task. A sprinter probably benefits from sharp focus. A footballer may need to be aware of their surroundings.

 

About the discipline thing. My host sucks at that. But she has a strategy. She redefines things until the task that needs to be done is no longer work. She dissociates her emotions from reality. They are just biological states caused by neurons misfiring in response to a state external to the body and of no relevance. She sees there to be no such thing as work, only activities. And finally, she recognises that it is futile to work hard, so long as the work gets done anyway. So there is no need to push, or get anxiety.

 

Sorry, no real question. Thoughts about this?

[Luminesce]

None really, it's 4 AM and I'm not conscious enough to be talking about consciousness. But I'll say that the awareness practice she's doing is better at keeping the random thoughts at bay than it is at "promoting" them. Tewi doesn't like making mental observations in words, although she mental plans in words.

[Maribel]

Spin, Reisen, spin!

[Lucilyn]

I found a cool quote! It seems really relevant to stuff we've talked about before but I don't know how exactly. But it is an amazing quote!

 

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."  - Sam Keen

[Guest Anonymous]

Look at the sky on 14 November, 20:09 GMT.