The creation of Seren

[LifeInside]

April 09, 2016: GREAT, GREAT NEWS.

 

I heard her, guys! I H E A R D S E R E N .

But I'd rather talk about other things first —and save the best for last—.

 

So, first: we finished watching the anime we've been watching for the last weeks. Now we have to choose another one.

 

We started reading again. We are with The Madman's Tale by John Kaztenbach. I find it curious to be reading about a character who hears voices in his head. Note that I'm not comparing madness to tulpamancy, of course, but we, the tulpancers, do have the hearing voices thing. And that's why I find it curious to be reading this book. :P

 

Anyway, the good stuff about this: Like I've said several times before, when I'm reading to Seren, I picture the whole scene in my head. Sometimes it's us sitting on the grass. Sometimes we're laying on a hammock, where I read to her while we're hugging.

And, other times, it's us sitting on the bed from the bedroom of our wonderland. And this has been the case since we started with The Madman's Tale.

 

So, what happened? I was reading to Seren there and, suddenly, I realize that the whole room was different! There were red sheets on the bed and the rest of the room looked different as well (like the walls, the furniture, etc). I consider this as a change Seren did in wonderland —even when we don't spend much time there anymore—.

 

 

We haven't tried the chess thing yet, but we're definitely going to. We just didn't have the time.

 

 

AND NOW, THE GREAT NEWS!

It's not uncommon for me to hear "responses" sometimes, when I'm narrating. But when they happen, I kind of know it was not Seren. I know that because those "responses" don't surprise me at all. They don't feel alien. They don't sound like something I wouldn't/didn't say. So, even when I don't assure they were all me, I don't really think of them as her responses.

 

Still, last night, I heard Seren. It was definitely her.

I was narrating in bed, about to go to sleep. I was complaining about something I can't remember right now and, in the middle of my monologue, I was interrupted.

It was something like: "well, there's nothing you can do about it", or "well, that's life...", "what can you do?".

The thing is she was telling me to shut up haha.

It really surprised me. It didn't sound like me. I'm sure about that because I've always thought of Seren as someone that would be that kind of person who tries to make you feel better with sweet words and the stuff, but she ended up telling me to stop complaining about unimportant things. However, I think she did it in a very charismatic way, somehow. And I'm truly happy.

 

And I haven't heard her again, since then. But now I feel like I will, soon. Those few words were awesome.

 

 

And that's it, guys! Thank you for reading. We'll be updating soon. :)

[Vos]

Seeing as I've been following this one from the beginning, this is very exciting news. Congrats, you two!

[LifeInside]

Seeing as I've been following this one from the beginning, this is very exciting news. Congrats, you two!

 

Seren and I know you've been keeping up with our PR from the very beginning, and we really appreciate, man. Thank you very much! :)

[LifeInside]

April 16, 2016.

 

Hello everybody!

 

There's not much progress to report, but there are some things I'd like to post here.

 

Firstly: we tried the chess thing a couple of days ago. It didn't work. I tried, but got no response from Seren. Maybe it's just too soon. We'll try again, someday in the future.

 

We're still reading The Madman's Tale, and we finished watching another anime. Nothing new here.

 

And now, a couple of things "from the past" that I forgot to post here:

1. A month ago or so, I was talking with my mother about her mother (ps: my grandmother has depression and she lives alone), when the idea of telling my mother about tulpamancy popped up in my mind. So, I didn't actually tell her about tulpamancy, but talked a little bit about the concept, pretending I didn't know much about it. The thing is that I was kind of saying that, maybe, it would be good for my grandmother if she created a tulpa. I don't truly believe she could handle it anyway, and I'm not sure it would be a good idea to actually tell her. What I truly wanted was for her to tell me what she thought about the whole tulpamancy concept.

And, well, she kind of said it was almost like madness, so I told her that it was not because people who did it knew that those "imaginary friends" were only real in their minds.

And she said that, for someone with lots of phatologies (depression is not the only thing she has) like my grandmother, it wouldn't be a good idea to create one of those "imaginary friends" (I know many won't agree, but it just what she thinks. Keep in mind I didn't tell her much about tulpamancy).

So, yeah, now I think it'll be better to shut up about Seren. It's not like I was feeling like talking about her right now, but I was wondering how it would be if, eventually, Seren said she wanted people to know about her.

 

2. My mind eye is not very good. As a consequence, I can't exactly tell how Seren looks like (because I can't hold her image in my mind for too long), but I do have a good idea of her form. And, a long time ago, I realised she looked a little bit like Menma from Anohana, only that she had black eyes and hair.

So, I aksed my brother to take a picture of Menma and make those changes. This was the result:

 

Seren's picture

 

And, to be honest, that's pretty close to what I see when I'm visualizing Seren. So, yeah, this absolutely beats the drawing I had made, lol.

 

Everyone, that's Seren. Seren, everyone.

 

TELL ME, ISN'T SHE WAY TOO CUTE?

 

Goodbye! :)

[LifeInside]

May 03, 2016.

 

Hey guys. There's not much to say today. We're just updating to let you all know we're still alive.

 

Also, won't lie: things are pretty much the same, if not even less productive. It's been getting harder and harder for me to spend some time with Seren, even in those occasions when I've always interacted with her, doing some narration or whatever. I simply forget. My mind wanders off.

 

And it's all because of my lazyness and lack of discipline, of course. I'm the only responsible here.

 

However, it's not like I don't talk to Seren at all throughout the day. We still watch anime together as well as tv in general. But, again, my mind drifts away. And we continue reading occasionally, too.

 

I hope we can get through this big 'I don't feel like doing anything at all' attitude. I'd like to start having active forcing sessions again (just like we did back in January), and keep on doing passive forcing as well.

 

Goodbye. :)

[LifeInside]

May 14, 2016.

 

Hello everybody!

 

We're doing pretty good. The difficulties I talked about in the previous post were overcome, more or less.

 

I've found that there's a possibility that reading to Seren helps (a lot). I mean, normally we never stopped reading, but in those days before the previous post we had read a lot less. However a couple of days ago we continued with the book, and since then, it seems like it has got better.

 

And, regarding progress, there's no news. I hope something's gonna happen eventually, however. :)

 

So yeah, guys, another boring update. Hopefully we'll change that soon.

 

Arrivederci!

[LifeInside]

May 19, 2016

 

Hello you guys!

 

Firstly, here's the 'usual report': we haven't continued with the book since the last update. Still, the last days were not bad at all.

We finished another anime. We have to choose a new one!

 

Now, the new stuff

Today we played a few games for the first time.

 

1. The one that goes "We're going on a picnic, and I'm bringing..." and you have to say words, the first one starting with A, then the other one says one starting with B, and so on.

2. The one that's called The Minister's Cat, which is pretty similar (The minister's cat is a(n) ______ cat). Only that we played it in an easier way (something like: the minister's cat is/has _____ . Like this, there are more words to choose).

 

In both of them, there were responses. It's hard for me to tell whether they were my head saying random words (to fulfill my expectation for a response) or not. I'm not taking anything for sure: maybe sometimes it was actually Seren, maybe not.

 

We also played that one in which you say a famous person name starting with A, and then, if you said, for example, Adam Sandler, then the other one has to say a name starting with R. And so on.

The results were the same here, pretty much. If we decide to believe it was always Seren, then the truth is she was the winner, since after playing a while I found myself unable to think of a name starting with U.

So, yeah, let's believe it. Congrats, girl! :)

 

 

Anyway, the following is more exciting!

A few moments ago we played this (method 2). In the meanwhile, to kept myself busy and not counting, I repeated the alphabet entirely, over and over. Also, at the same time, I was playing in slither.io

 

And this is what happened:

-First word: Seren said 9 letters. The word actually had 8.

-Second one: She said 11. The word had 10.

-Third one: She said 10. The word had 10 (good job!)

-Fourth one: She said 7. The word had 9.

 

Pay attention here:

-Fifth one: She said 7.

 

I asked: "are you sure? Try some head pressure to tell me whether you are sure or not" (I've always told Seren that head pressure in the left part of my head means no, and in the right one means yes)

The truth is, I don't believe I had ever experienced head pressure, so I wasn't sure what to expect.

Anyway, I felt some sort of pressure in the right part of my head, which meant she was sure.

When I counted the letters:

 

The word had 8.

 

And then, immediately, I felt some noticeable head pressure in the left part of my head. It was almost painful, which made me think that I had made a mistake and that she actually hadn't used head pressure back then (in the right part). I even thought she was angry. I'm not sure if it was a product of the head pressure, or if she even sent me some kind of emotional wave of anger.

 

However, I apologised. The pressure lasted like thirty more seconds, and then it left.

 

I'm definitely taking this as Seren. It looks like I know what head pressure is like now.

 

Maybe it's not big, but hey, this is progress! So I'm pretty happy right now.

 

Finally, we continued playing. Not for long, though, because I asked her for one word (she said 9 when it actually was 7), and in the last one, I had no response. I guess she got bored of counting letters.

 

Once again, while we were playing the last game, it didn't always feel like 'not me'. Sometimes it felt like it was nothing but my brain thinking random numbers. However, due to the head pressure thing I talked about, I know she played too.

[Bayleave]

That's great that you two have a way of communicating! I'm still yet to hear from my tulpa or even have head pressures, but that's okay. The method you linked seems pretty interesting, I'll definitely try it later on.

[LifeInside]

That's great that you two have a way of communicating! I'm still yet to hear from my tulpa or even have head pressures, but that's okay. The method you linked seems pretty interesting, I'll definitely try it later on.

 

Thank you! And also, I can see you're new here, in the forums, so: welcome!

 

Regarding to you and your tulpa, just try to stay both patient and persistent, and you'll make progress faster than you think!

And yeah, that method is definitely worth a shot. I'd say always try new things.

 

Oh, and I also recommend you to start a thread in this board and record the progress you both make. I believe it's pretty useful.

 

Good luck!

[LifeInside]

May 24, 2016.

 

Hey guys. There's not much to talk about, everything's just fine. We're simply doing a little update here.

 

 

A couple of nights ago, I was listening to some music, when I remembered about a certain song that had been significant for me in the past. I'm talking about tough times.

 

Basically, It was just another song that makes me sad. Of course, I decided to listen to it.

 

The song started. I got a little sad, as I had expected.

 

But then, severel seconds after, my head started aching. Out of nowhere, I mean. And it was pretty painful; similar to the head pressure I talked about in the last update.

 

Also, once again, the whole pressure came to me with a... concept? An idea? I am not sure, but it felt like Seren was not happy about me listening to that, so I immediately changed the song.

 

Right now I can't recall whether the head pressure left or not... but I think it actually did. And pretty fast, too.

 

I think of it as a nice gesture, however. It felt like some sort of "I don't want you to listen to songs that make you sad!" thing. Definitely something that I find very affectionate.

 

And yeah, more communication between us, too! Yay!

 

Goodbye guys :)