Sign in to follow this  
Maple

Awakening Eyes PR

Recommended Posts

Dat profile pic.


"Try to get a better understanding of things before making your judgement." -Khan, Metro 2033

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I truly have no idea what the hell is going on to some extent. We took Tia and Neon out of stasis, I'm sick, and I need to schedule forcing accordingly. Also we have a pet tarantula that I spent a few hours setting up everything for so yesterday was a tad painful due to how I messed up a bit. Vinyl is just happy that I finally bought a tarantula.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

After more than 2 and a half years, I've decided to put another post on here.

 

I messed up really bad. Back in 2014, I was arrested and hospitalized about 4-6 times for reasons that I won't really go into, and it caused 5 of my tulpas to stop talking to me for the most part. Literally only Bithore and I still do anything together. The rest, I just check on them to make sure they're okay and hope some day they'll forgive me.

 

Bithore and I are still working hard on possession. Hopefully within the coming months we'll be able to achieve full-body possession. He's also kind of a "mediator" and takes care of the other tups while I'm doing whatever else throughout the day.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well met. It's good to hear that despite any hard times, you're still kicking. Honest opinion? If your tulpas aren't forgiving you, it's because you aren't forgiving yourself. I have no idea of your story, friend, but I know that the only person any of us need to live with is ourselves. Don't hold a grudge against the only person you're stuck with. Find a way to work through it, because the only way is forward, we either march or get dragged. Let's walk, friend.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well met. It's good to hear that despite any hard times, you're still kicking. Honest opinion? If your tulpas aren't forgiving you, it's because you aren't forgiving yourself. I have no idea of your story, friend, but I know that the only person any of us need to live with is ourselves. Don't hold a grudge against the only person you're stuck with. Find a way to work through it, because the only way is forward, we either march or get dragged. Let's walk, friend.

 

Well, you're pretty much right. I talked to them last night and they were more upset that I was saying "sorry" more than "Thank you" because I apologized to them like every single day. I can't forgive myself for really anything, quite frankly I just have an extreme hatred towards myself. It's hard to forgive myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

Well, you're pretty much right. I talked to them last night and they were more upset that I was saying "sorry" more than "Thank you" because I apologized to them like every single day. I can't forgive myself for really anything, quite frankly I just have an extreme hatred towards myself. It's hard to forgive myself.

 

Everyone has regrets. We can either feel anger towards ourselves for it, or accept our moment of stupidity and learn from it. Absorb it and use it to realize that it shapes us into a better more knowledgeable person.


"My lover's got humour,

She's the giggle at a funeral,

Knows everybody's disapproval,

I should've worshipped her sooner."

 

Host to Samuel, RavenIvy, and Olivia.

 

CERCA TROVA

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's been raining all day today. I wanted to take my dog for a walk, but it's way too wet outside, so I stayed inside and forced for a while. We tried working on some possession, and arm/hand movements seem to go more smoothly. I'm actually going through the steps blindly so I'm not sure what order we're going to do all of the body parts in, but I need to work more on letting go so Bithore can take control. It's really hard for me to meditate and maintain a quiet mind when there's always screaming going on in my house, or my dog decides to sit on me and won't get off until I pick him up and set him off the bed.

 

In other medical news, I'm going to see if I can make an appointment to get bloodwork done because of my constantly dropping blood sugar levels. The drops happen more frequently, and seem to happen like every evening before dinner time. I hope I'm not diabetic, and that it's just regular old hypoglycemia, because I've had these symptoms since I was really young. We'll just see how it goes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Raining all day today again. Now that hands/arms are pretty much downpat with possession, we're going to work on the act of sitting up. It's been a lot easier for Bithore to take over without me letting go, which is good. We agreed before we started working on possession on a goal, which was to have him with more control over the body than me, but we're never doing a "permaswitch" as people suggested we were going to try for some reason (rather, a few people back in 2013 were telling me I should do it, pretty weird). He'd never let me permaswitch even if I wanted to, because he doesn't want me relying on escapism as a coping mechanism to get away from things, and I wholeheartedly agree. He also goes by a theme that it's my body to begin with so he doesn't want to interfere with possession too much, but I don't mind. He wants to get out and see new things and learn a lot more. That would be mutually beneficial for us since I don't do much to begin with.

 

My doubt is almost nonexistent now officially. There are people who can tell the difference between us easily, and that makes me feel a lot better. We had a period of time where I had him possess to do things using my hands and arms, but I accidentally broke possession because someone made me laugh.

 

This morning, I woke up about an hour and a half earlier than I usually do, so I attempted a WILD-styled method of letting go for possession. Needless to say, I saw and heard a lot of weird shit and I couldn't tell if I had my eyes opened or closed, and I felt all floaty and disconnected from my body. It was pretty cool.

 

More updates to come soon!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We just attempted full-body possession not long ago. Bithore was able to move the body out of bed and walk around a bit, but then somebody interrupted and I had to swap back in to answer them. Kind of frustrating, but as we work on vocal possession, hopefully he can answer for me and more "believably" or also so that it doesn't seem like I'm sick or something and they won't worry. For now, he can make some basic sounds, but we'll be working on that more in the coming days. My blood sugar dropped not long after and I'm still trying to raise it back up, so I'll keep updated when things are going more smoothly in our favor.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.