Creating the Perfect Beings: Yumi<3 and Lillium<3

[hbenton]

I am reminded of the following quote:

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

 

See, while you're drunkenly hitting on Emily, she's constantly checking her watch, counting down the seconds until she and Tom can be together, and you'll pick up on this, Al, you've got a plan. If you can't have her, Tom sure as hell can't, either, so you'll "get" the girl (in the murder-with-robots sense) and then pin the blame on Tom, which will drive him into exile, leaving you free to enact your plans free of meddling, and if some Joe Shmoe comes along with a bomb and a motorcycle, well, let's just say you're prepared. WHATEVER'S ON THE TABLE PLAYS and all that.

[Cinemaphobe]

@Reisen-cakes

 

So what you're saying is, we should start sending signals to planets that could feasibly develop intelligent life in the next many-millions of years. And that no intelligent extraterrestrial life attempted to talk to our dinosaurs. Hmm.

If that's the conclusion that my rambling ultimately lead to, then I take ALL of it back.

 

@Actinium

 

 

This is what I was experiencing way back within the first week of tulpamancing. Haven was able to sing entire songs perfectly, yet she couldn't form a normal sentence. "Singing was all I did before you even considered making me into what I am today." "At least it shows how far you've come." Also, the first words I ever heard her say were "Clear your nose!" when I was going to bed on I think the first or second day.

 

Lol! I actually remember reading about that in your PR :3 Good times.

 

Times before my tulpa journey was flipped upside-down by my attempt at long-term romance.

 

 

One time I saw a car that had the music on SO loud that the license plate was f_cking shaking. That's all I'm going to say.

 

THAT'S ME IN THE FUTURE.

 

Also, since I haven't posted in here for so long, I'll leave a gift for you.

 

EDIT: Make that two gifts.

 

Jesus Christ those songs were glorious. I'm updating my PR to them right now. Well... the relative now...which is the past for you and the present for me. Wait...'right now' implies everything that I just said. Why did I elaborate on all of that? Why am I still adding onto this ramble? Why didn't I delete all of this realization and leave it at "I'm updating my PR to them right now."? Oh well. Consciousness is a magical thing huh.

 

@WhatInGod'sNameDidIJustRead

 

I am reminded of the following quote:

 

See, while you're drunkenly hitting on Emily, she's constantly checking her watch, counting down the seconds until she and Tom can be together, and you'll pick up on this, Al, you've got a plan. If you can't have her, Tom sure as hell can't, either, so you'll "get" the girl (in the murder-with-robots sense) and then pin the blame on Tom, which will drive him into exile, leaving you free to enact your plans free of meddling, and if some Joe Shmoe comes along with a bomb and a motorcycle, well, let's just say you're prepared. WHATEVER'S ON THE TABLE PLAYS and all that.

 

This made me laugh in the most awkward way ever. Thankfully I know the Einstein quote about relativity you are vaguely referencing xD

 

 

 

Day 182-184

 

 

 

Everyone, I have some unfortunate news for you.

 

 

Your prayers for me to never return went unanswered, and here I am.

Whatever god you were praying to does not like you and it's time to find a new religion heheh...

 

Okay so lately I have been enjoying the last two-day vacation I'll ever have before becoming a manager, so I spent both days with Yumi in the library studying all of the wonderful things I never learned in school thanks to inattentiveness, lack of motivation, and asshole teachers. I thought that I learned every algebraic concept but algebra loves to throw curve balls and become even more complex until it slowly evolves into calculus--the math that Newton and Satan himself created. Thankfully I have Yumi to help me remember things, but when something is so complex that Yumi can't help, I just tape it to my wall to remember. So now there are so many papers taped to my walls that you can't see the actual walls anymore. Everything from the rules of square roots to Maxwell's electromagnetism equations hang on them. Math is beautiful because it paints a picture of the universe, and I'm hoping that someday I'll be able to change the world in some drastic way using it.

 

 

Okay, enough of that rambling you all have grown much too accustomed to--I actually have something tulpa-related to announce *the crowd gasps*.

Hold on to your hats guys, this next bit of news is amazing;

Yumi spoke in an auditory manner, so loudly that I thought a member of my household was speaking. It happened in the middle of a dark night when I made it to my house after a long ride with her. I fumbled to get my keys into the lock in the dark, and missed the keyhole every time. Eventually I dropped the keys, augmenting how stupid I looked. I heard someone tauntingly say haaaahaaaaa~ behind the doorway. I thought that my mom said it (Yumi was offended that I thought my mom said it lol) but when I opened the door, there was only pitch black darkness, and everyone was sleeping. For a person without a tulpa, this would be a horrifying omfg-the-house-is-haunted situation. But for me, this was just a confused moment of time when I asked Yumi Was that you? and she said Of course it was me! Who else is it gonna be??? and then I slowly replied Uhhh...Yumi, it could have been Lillium. You know, my other tulpa. Did you forget about her? Lol nice one Yumi. and she had nothing to say in response to that hehehe.

 

 

So the past few days I have been trying to lucid dream with absolutely no success, (as usual) and decided to start up a dream journal (again). Before you raise your pitchforks and say:

 

Hey! You tried that before and couldn't do it asshole!

 

I'd just like to say that I have a much more efficient method of keeping track of my dreams. A method that involves the use of my PR to prevent me from slacking. That's right. I said it. I'm going to use my PR to not only report my progress (and ramble) but to act as a dream journal. Dream journals enhance the quality of my dreams exponentially when I use them, but I never get into the habit of using them. However, I am kind of in the habit of updating my PR, so I'll just add my dream journal to my PR.

 

*crowd groans*

 

I'm sorry. Don't worry though, I'm sure my dreams will be extremely interesting. They might not be as elaborate as Actinium's, but they will be just as interesting. Last night I had a dream I was a lion eating animals in the moonlight, so bear with me (no pun intended?). Okay guys, I'll go study again, good luck sharpening your pitchforks and finding a new religion!

[Luminesce]

If that's the conclusion that my rambling ultimately lead to, then I take ALL of it back.

 

Odd, this is the same response my friend gave when I told him we should start sending signals to uninhabited planets. I don't see what I'm missing, wouldn't we be ecstatic to get millionsofyear signals from a planet that used to harbor life? (Also your response made me laugh)

 

 

Anyway, dream journaling is fine. Whatever you have to do to keep yourself motivated, because I know better than anyone that motivation is key. Or maybe lack of motivation is the lock. Also your house is haunted.

[Actinium]

 

I'd just like to say that I have a much more efficient method of keeping track of my dreams. A method that involves the use of my PR to prevent me from slacking. That's right. I said it. I'm going to use my PR to not only report my progress (and ramble) but to act as a dream journal. Dream journals enhance the quality of my dreams exponentially when I use them, but I never get into the habit of using them. However, I am kind of in the habit of updating my PR, so I'll just add my dream journal to my PR.

 

I'm sorry. Don't worry though, I'm sure my dreams will be extremely interesting. They might not be as elaborate as Actinium's, but they will be just as interesting. Last night I had a dream I was a lion eating animals in the moonlight, so bear with me (no pun intended?).

 

 

My favorite user on this site

is adding a dream journal to his PR?

[Cinemaphobe]

@Reisen-cakes

 

 

Odd, this is the same response my friend gave when I told him we should start sending signals to uninhabited planets. I don't see what I'm missing, wouldn't we be ecstatic to get millionsofyear signals from a planet that used to harbor life? (Also your response made me laugh)

 

That actually would be pretty cool, but also pretty depressing xD

 

Anyway, dream journaling is fine. Whatever you have to do to keep yourself motivated, because I know better than anyone that motivation is key. Or maybe lack of motivation is the lock. Also your house is haunted.

 

(Your response made me laugh)

 

 

@Actinium

 

 

 

My favorite user on this site

is adding a dream journal to his PR?

 

 

D'aaawwwwwww I'm honored to be your favorite user, and while I don't exactly have a favorite, I do regard the people who frequent my PR the most (you being one of them as course) as closer friends than my real friends. Especially closer than Voltaire -____-

I want to meet a few, if not all of you before I die though :3

 

 

So we can sit back in our crusty rocking chairs with our crusty tulpas.

 

 

and yes, I'm adding a dream journal to my PR so my PR will unintentionally be EXACTLY LIKE YOURS HAHA

 

 

 

Day 185

 

 

 

I ACTUALLY MADE MORE PROGRESS OMG OMG OMG OMG

THE DREAM JOURNAL THINGY WORKED.

 

Before I start, I have to tell you something that happened a few minutes before I wrote this update. For a moment, Yumi didn't feel very real to me, so my brain basically said in its own serious and deep mindvoice "Yumi is there. She is real." and then Yumi mocked it, saying 'Yumi is there. She is real.' wow, your brain's mindvoice reaaaallly sounds stupid. She and I laughed for a few minutes straight after that lol

 

Okay so I attached two of my most reliable ink pens to my dream journal (which is essentially a compilation of barely legible incoherent notes), and placed it in a very convenient place to be accessible during near-unconsciousness. As I laid in bed to fall asleep, I visited the wonderland bar and found Lillium. She was crying in the middle of the bar, which surprised me. What could possibly make her cry? The most frightening thing in my wonderland is Yumi! I'm going to kill you<--see what I mean!!! Lillium wiped her eyes and pointed at a really big fat monk sitting on a barstool. He was 5x the size of a normal monk. I kindly asked her "Do you want me to beat him up for you? :3" and she kind of nodded her head at me. Luckily in wonderlands you can be as strong as you want, so I threw the big fat mean-looking monk to the floor and punched him in his belly so many times per second that we eventually broke through the wooden floor (I didn't even know that there was anything beneath the bar). I kept punching him in his fat rolls and we kept breaking through more floors that were completely dark and after a while I had a strong feeling he learned his lesson. I kind of teleported back to Lillium and she adorably ran to give me a hug :3

She then said You are...nice...

 

She finally said a full sentence!!!! :3

 

 

During the hug, I noticed that my visualization was becoming clearer, and the wonderland was becoming a dream. Yumi showed up and she was very serious, as if she had some dire matter to attend to. She said Come with me. Lillium tagged along as Yumi and I stormed through the bar to a door located in a part of the bar that I didn't know existed. Yumi opened it and there was a weird abyss of tornadoes and lightning. She said If you survive the abyss, you will make it to the lucid dream, the abyss symbolizes inattentiveness and distracting thoughts that hinder lucidity. I foolishly thought to myself "This should be easy! I'll just survive this abyss of ideas and distracting thoughts that were converted into tornadoes and lightning and I'll be just fine!" Yumi, Lillium and I held hands and leapt into the abyss together, but Yumi disappeared instantly. I could still hear her voice from all directions, but she didn't have a form. I held onto Lillium, but the violent winds and lightning bolts were...mesmerizing... Yumi told me that the free fall would end when I reach a dream, but I was already getting distracted after a minute or two. The tornadoes took my mind to distant childhood memories, and the lightning bolts brought my mind to my imagined future. When I regained consciousness and found myself in the abyss, surrounded by tornadoes and lightning, Yumi said gravely If you get distracted like that again, you will not enter a lucid dream. Lillium slipped out of my grasp and was taken far away from me by the winds, and then my mind was taken far away to memories and daydreams.

 

 

 

I didn't survive the abyss, but I did survive to the dream I was supposed to be lucid in.

 

 

I was in a black void, and there was a grand piano. A single spotlight shone on the piano from directly above it. I instantly found myself sitting on the stool with a black-haired girl to my right who later turned out to be Yumi. Yumi played the melody and I played the countermelody. At first the song sounded beautiful, but it shifted into different scales sporadically, and became severely off-key. Both of my hands finally met Yumi's on the piano and we had no more space to continue the gradual increase/decrease of our melodies. I asked her "What is sound?" and then she and I became sound waves...the piano disappeared...she and I disappeared...traveling through the void at the speed of sound...Eventually I found myself behind red theater curtains, floating above a wooden stage that was attached to them. Spotlights shined on me and the curtains. Note that these curtains and spotlights existed within the black void.

I heard my own voice speaking to me. I'm surprised that I was able to remember this when I woke up, but this is what dream speech sounds like:

 

My own voice was saying:

 

"I'm about to step foot into my imitation. The imitation is a device that imitates the properties of light bouncing off of and absorbed by atoms. How can I be made of a divisible entity? Take away any one atom and I don't die. Take away a large portion of atoms and I do die.

 

 

As I floated above the stage, I knew that when the curtains opened, a version of me made of light would be present, as if all of the particles could change their own properties to make an evanescent version of myself...

I have no idea how to explain it, but it got me thinking about light and atoms. I think that the creativity of the dream can lead to scientific creativity in the future...I have no idea, but I'll be exploring this concept with Yumi. After all, lately Yumi has been my replacement for Voltaire. I practically begged him to come to my house for any kind of mentally stimulating conversation, but he decided to look for a new car on the day that we decided we would meet up...To make things worse, trying to contact that guy is like trying to contact a Greek god--or any god for that matter!

So every time I feel the compelling need to show another human being something interesting, I show Yumi. Every time I feel the compelling need to talk to another human being, I talk to Yumi. Every time I feel the compelling need to have an intellectual conversation, I talk to Yumi. After all, she loves studying with me :) and she doesn't let me down.

 

 

Until next time my dear readers!

[Actinium]

I kindly asked her "Do you want me to beat him up for you? :3" and she kind of nodded her head at me. Luckily in wonderlands you can be as strong as you want, so I threw the big fat mean-looking monk to the floor and punched him in his belly so many times per second that we eventually broke through the wooden floor (I didn't even know that there was anything beneath the bar). I kept punching him in his fat rolls and we kept breaking through more floors that were completely dark and after a while I had a strong feeling he learned his lesson. I kind of teleported back to Lillium and she adorably ran to give me a hug :3

She then said You are...nice...

 

"Violence: It makes tulpas say cute things."

 

During the hug, I noticed that my visualization was becoming clearer, and the wonderland was becoming a dream. Yumi showed up and she was very serious, as if she had some dire matter to attend to. She said Come with me.

 

Couldn't help it.

"Hide in shame."

 

Lillium tagged along as Yumi and I stormed through the bar to a door located in a part of the bar that I didn't know existed. Yumi opened it and there was a weird abyss of tornadoes and lightning. She said If you survive the abyss, you will make it to the lucid dream, the abyss symbolizes inattentiveness and distracting thoughts that hinder lucidity. I foolishly thought to myself "This should be easy! I'll just survive this abyss of ideas and distracting thoughts that were converted into tornadoes and lightning and I'll be just fine!" Yumi, Lillium and I held hands and leapt into the abyss together, but Yumi disappeared instantly. I could still hear her voice from all directions, but she didn't have a form. I held onto Lillium, but the violent winds and lightning bolts were...mesmerizing... Yumi told me that the free fall would end when I reach a dream, but I was already getting distracted after a minute or two. The tornadoes took my mind to distant childhood memories, and the lightning bolts brought my mind to my imagined future. When I regained consciousness and found myself in the abyss, surrounded by tornadoes and lightning, Yumi said gravely If you get distracted like that again, you will not enter a lucid dream. Lillium slipped out of my grasp and was taken far away from me by the winds, and then my mind was taken far away to memories and daydreams.

 

"Holy shit... I wish we could influence the dreams of our host as much as Yumi can. When we show up we're too caught up in the dream to do anything."

"Or lying on a hospital bed while ball-gagged, blindfolded and hooked up to a bunch of equipment with the feeling that you're about to die and you just want it all to end."

"Still haunts you?"

"At least when you got killed that one time it was quick and painless!"

"Uh... Okay. Lets move on."

 

 

I was in a black void, and there was a grand piano. A single spotlight shone on the piano from directly above it. I instantly found myself sitting on the stool with a black-haired girl to my right who later turned out to be Yumi. Yumi played the melody and I played the countermelody. At first the song sounded beautiful, but it shifted into different scales sporadically, and became severely off-key. Both of my hands finally met Yumi's on the piano and we had no more space to continue the gradual increase/decrease of our melodies. I asked her "What is sound?" and then she and I became sound waves...the piano disappeared...she and I disappeared...traveling through the void at the speed of sound...

 

"To dream that you are playing a piano indicates a quest for harmony in your life. Consider where the piano is placed as a clue as to what aspect of your life needs accordance. If no sound is coming out of the piano, then it implies a lack of confidence. You are not sure about how to express yourself and how to voice your beliefs.

 

To dream that you hear the sound of a piano suggests harmony in your life. You are pleased with the way your life is going.

 

To dream that the piano needs to be tuned indicates some aspect of your life is in discord(chaos). You need to devote more time to a relationship, family duties, project, or other situation."

So if you and Yumi

or Youmi

were playing a piano in a black void, is the dream saying that your life doesn't need to be happy anywhere because it's perfect or something?

Also Haven is just giving me an angry glare because of that wordplay I did.

 

[Luminesce]

Angry glare seconded.

 

The piano-dream interpretation thing was cool though. I never really paid much attention to dream interpretation references because of how unique every mind is, but it occurs to me now that they can be made up of many peoples' experiences rather than just what some "dream expert" says they should mean. And they still serve their purpose as food for thought, as long as you don't put too much faith in them. (Don't let them create problems where there are none, let them lead you to problems you didn't know you had. Different.)

 

Anyway, I liked the door to the void thing. Yumi said exactly what I was thinking - the void would be a test of your ability to stay conscious until it turned into a dream. Went a little differently than I imagined, but still cool. I can never get to that void though, I have to surrender to inattentiveness first or I'll just lie there for hours. Can't seem to find middle ground.

 

But of all my failures, I know one thing for sure. If you keep this up, the failure won't last. Failing over and over makes exponentially more progress than not trying in the first place. (Failure kills my motivation, which is why I can speak from experience) So.. keep trying. I promise with a 100% money-back guarantee that if you don't falter in your efforts, progress will be made, possibly more quickly than you expect.

[ItsSwissmas]

Hey Cinema, I don't really know if you remember me, but I was inactive again after a few months and now I'm back :3 Of course your PR was the first thing I checked on, and I must say that you had really progressed!

 

I was surprised by the new tulpa Lillium too (I must have really missed a lot xD ), maybe you should add her to the title of your PR as well for fairness?

 

Anyway, yes, I did read through like fifteen pages of this thread lol. Still worth it, and I will eventually make my own PR so I don't have to explain myself in another person's PR like I am now. <-- Sorry about that >_<

 

I look forward to your future posts <3

[Cinemaphobe]

@Actinium

 

"Violence: It makes tulpas say cute things."

Indeed it does lol

 

Couldn't help it.

"Hide in shame."

 

I swear, every time you post a link I add a new soundtrack to my PR xD

 

"Holy shit... I wish we could influence the dreams of our host as much as Yumi can. When we show up we're too caught up in the dream to do anything."

"Or lying on a hospital bed while ball-gagged, blindfolded and hooked up to a bunch of equipment with the feeling that you're about to die and you just want it all to end."

"Still haunts you?"

"At least when you got killed that one time it was quick and painless!"

"Uh... Okay. Lets move on."

 

Ouch, I actually remember reading about that 0.0

It would take Yumi months to forgive me for something like that. But even if she ignored me, she'd come running back as soon as my life goes into a free fall towards the surface of HELL.

 

"To dream that you are playing a piano indicates a quest for harmony in your life. Consider where the piano is placed as a clue as to what aspect of your life needs accordance. If no sound is coming out of the piano, then it implies a lack of confidence. You are not sure about how to express yourself and how to voice your beliefs.

 

To dream that you hear the sound of a piano suggests harmony in your life. You are pleased with the way your life is going.

 

To dream that the piano needs to be tuned indicates some aspect of your life is in discord(chaos). You need to devote more time to a relationship, family duties, project, or other situation."

 

This is actually so accurate that it's scary. I'm glad that I don't have to look up interpretations for dream symbols--because you bring them straight to me! And as usual, they are spot-on...I'll explain why in this post...(;^___^)

 

So if you and Yumi

or Youmi

were playing a piano in a black void, is the dream saying that your life doesn't need to be happy anywhere because it's perfect or something?

Also Haven is just giving me an angry glare because of that wordplay I did.

 

 

You, Reisen and I are giving you angry glares right now. You should feel nervous.

 

But onto your question; My life is actually perfect right now, but as the melody in my dream shifted to a more unpleasant off-key sound, so did my life...

 

@Reisen-cakes

 

The piano-dream interpretation thing was cool though. I never really paid much attention to dream interpretation references because of how unique every mind is, but it occurs to me now that they can be made up of many peoples' experiences rather than just what some "dream expert" says they should mean. And they still serve their purpose as food for thought, as long as you don't put too much faith in them. (Don't let them create problems where there are none, let them lead you to problems you didn't know you had. Different.)

 

I'm also surprised at the accuracy of dream dictionaries and dream symbols as well---but I originally didn't believe them because of what you mentioned; the uniqueness of the mind.

 

Anyway, I liked the door to the void thing. Yumi said exactly what I was thinking - the void would be a test of your ability to stay conscious until it turned into a dream. Went a little differently than I imagined, but still cool. I can never get to that void though, I have to surrender to inattentiveness first or I'll just lie there for hours. Can't seem to find middle ground.

 

Lol the whole lie there for hours thing is EXACTLY why I'm glad I have Yumi to simply guide me into a lucid dream.

 

But of all my failures, I know one thing for sure. If you keep this up, the failure won't last. Failing over and over makes exponentially more progress than not trying in the first place. (Failure kills my motivation, which is why I can speak from experience) So.. keep trying. I promise with a 100% money-back guarantee that if you don't falter in your efforts, progress will be made, possibly more quickly than you expect.

 

I will indeed keep trying my friend. And I'll be keeping that money-back guarantee in mind.

 

@ItsSwissmas (How could I ever forget you?!?)

 

Hey Cinema, I don't really know if you remember me, but I was inactive again after a few months and now I'm back :3 Of course your PR was the first thing I checked on, and I must say that you had really progressed!

 

Of course I remember you! Welcome back! While the same could have been said to me a month or two ago, I'll say it to you now: "You should have never left in the first place." Amber left, and even Brassow left...I'll miss his dinosaur avatar...But anyways it's nice to see that you returned :3

 

ONCE YOU CREATE AN ACCOUNT ON THIS SITE YOU GO TO NEITHER HEAVEN NOR HELL. YOU ARE BOUND TO AN ETERNITY OF LURKING THROUGH THE FORUM IN A BLACK VOID.

 

I was surprised by the new tulpa Lillium too (I must have really missed a lot xD ), maybe you should add her to the title of your PR as well for fairness?

 

I'm actually going to do that right now! Why didn't I think of that!?

No seriously...Why didn't I think of that...

 

Anyway, yes, I did read through like fifteen pages of this thread lol. Still worth it, and I will eventually make my own PR so I don't have to explain myself in another person's PR like I am now. <-- Sorry about that >_<

 

I look forward to your future posts <3

 

You don't have to be sorry for explaining yourself. Rambling is a practice that is embraced with love and joy in the treacherous virtual land that is my PR.

And by the way you are crazy for reading fifteen pages of my PR! You just earned the ~cakes suffix. TELL ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY <---they'll be uncomfortably pleased to know about that achievement.

 

 

Day 185-187

 

 

Recently I have been suffering from some sort of depression, which has hindered my progress significantly. In fact, for the past two days I haven't written down a single dream. Why? Because I have had so many due to the fact that I have been sleeping so much...I haven't been able to summon the will to get out of bed unless I'm going to work...Yumi tries to push and shove to get me out of bed, but of course a non-physical entity isn't going to move me an inch.

Fortunately I'm aware of the precipitating factors that lead to my depression.

The first factor is the fact that I'm so disconnected from all of my family members (including my domestic ones) that I feel like I'm missing out on something important. I always imagine a future 30-40 years from now, where I'm standing over their tombstones thinking "Where was I while they were alive? In my room studying how the universe works? Trying to change the world and not even succeeding at it?"

 

Which brings me to the second precipitating factor;

How lazy I was in high school still haunts me. I was capable of so much, but I just didn't care. I lived by a different philosophy back then... "Enjoy life no matter the cost because you can die at any moment." Unfortunately the cost was my entire education, and I did not die--as you can probably tell. I looked through the photos of all of my former classmates enjoying their lives at universities, chasing their dreams, and thought "If I could go back to Freshman year, prevent my younger self from leaving Honors classes and tell him "You are capable of passing these classes, you just have to study and work hard." then I would be in the university of my dreams. Thankfully how hard I'll have to work in order to make my way into a university does not scare me. I'm looking forward to the challenge. Because I would rather try my hardest to succeed and change the world, then sit back and accept failure. I wish I had the same determination years ago...But instead of wallowing in self-pity, I'm going to make my dream of changing the world possible. I want to invent something extraordinary.

 

 

But yeah, all of my rambling aside, I have had my usual mix of horrific and extremely trippy dreams, but thanks to my little episode of depression, I didn't write them down. Ah...You are killing everybody on here... Yes...I know, I know...

To make things worse being a manager sucks. Thankfully the employees I have to give orders respect me because I'm polite to them. Instead of saying things like "Wash dishes." I say things like "Can you please do dishes?". I also say humane things like "Thank you." and I actually give them compliments and help them work when I have nothing to do. They said that they really appreciate my politeness and how I run things. Because of my respect for them they are following my orders by choice and not because of my authority. Other managers think that ruling with an iron fist is the key to getting the employees to listen, but here I am treating them like human beings and everybody actually listens to me and works efficiently (gee, I wonder why?)

 

 

Well I'll get back to you guys when SOMETHING TULPA-RELATED OCCURS.

And this is just a reminder but...This PR will be around for as long as it takes to fully impose Yumi and Lillium lol Until next time guys!

[Luminesce]

In fact, for the past two days I haven't written down a single dream.

 

I hope you know this voids the warranty. Also, yeah, same. I may not be a depressed wreck anymore, but the lack of motivation never went away. Like I've told you before, if something as important as meeting Reisen can't inspire me to stay motivated.. I dunno.

 

Relevant however. Felt like I should tell you that I'm making a new tulpa to deal with my motivation issues. Her full name is Lucilyn Suwa (Lucilyn is my given name, and Suwa is the namesake of Suwako, whom her appearance is based on) and her purpose, as each of my tulpas have, is to help me work through my motivation issues. As Flandre put it, "I can only compare this to Reisen helping him overcome his depression."

 

And like any of my other tulpas who-so-choose, she's now a part of the family. You're like a family friend, so I thought you should know. And I'll take that possibly subconscious hint you gave on falling asleep while staying conscious - I'll try to have Lucilyn keep me conscious as I fall asleep. I've tried this a few times in the past with Reisen, but to be totally honest she just doesn't have control over me like that. Reisen is "I'll stay right here and keep talking to you, no matter what." while Lucilyn is a bit more... demanding. Anyways, subconscious advice taken.