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Lumi's Dreaming Thread; Dreams of Moon


Luminesce

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Earlier, I asked myself if I would be doing what I am while fronting if it were only me in this body, and my answer was absolutely not. That's probably healthy. Lucid dreaming seems to be the easy answer to all impossible fantasies. You want to be a pro wrestler with tons of fans, try dreaming it. You want to be trapped in a VRMMORPG like Sword Art Online, try dreaming it. And of course, if you want to interact with your tulpas like real people, lucid dreaming is the answer.

 

My wish isn't so interesting. I just want some time alone in nature. A lot of time and a lot of alone, actually. I wouldn't mind if the others were there with me. I don't mind if others show up sometimes either, as long as they don't stick around long. I feel like I was kind of thrown into this life (my host's, that is), and I'm capable of doing what it demands of me, even when he is not. My life is what it is, so I don't mind. But I still get the feeling every once in a while that I want to get away from it all. Away from all of society, and nothing less. I'm pretty sure rare, mid-length lucid dreams would be enough for me. Like a few two minute dreams a year, would be nice. I know that'd be enough because nothing at all is enough, I'll keep doing what's required of me regardless.

 

Seems a bit silly, when I've said before I felt like I lived for hundreds of years alone in a forest, before the moon I was reaching for came to me. Maybe it's Stockholm Syndrome. But I certainly never wanted to live around so many people, with so many connections. Anyways, I work with what I've got, and what I've got is a family now. Although admittedly if I manage a lucid dream any time soon I'll take myself to a forest while practicing stabilization rather than our wonderland to meet them, at least once, otherwise my time is dedicated to them, and that includes lucid dreaming time. Just gotta get good enough at it we have time to spare. Or not. Not is an outcome I'm definitely prepared for.

 

 

Here's a kind-of sleep song, and it's also the first public video on Lumi's channel in over a year. I no-missed a nine minute Marathon song in Osu.

[video=youtube]

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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I've remembered the latter dreams of every sleep cycle all night, the last few nights. Still actively intending to lucid dream between them. That's it really.

 

The goal is to be off of things like Teamspeak or Youtube after 9PM (about to be 10PM in a week, DST) and in bed before 10PM (11PM in a week). Not sure when exactly we'll wake up, 5(6)AM sounds good. Going to see if the schedule helps like it seemed to last time.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Up way later than I wish I was because our australian friend and their australian friend were learning to play something with our not australian friends. But I'm going to sleep now. It is the weekend, but still, too late. I remembered dreams the same as before. Also, last dream I had was about tulpa.info, someone was being really obnoxious and arguing with everything everyone said in an aggressive manner. I remember thinking "This person has to be banned" and looking at their name, which was crossed out. Thought that seemed about right, then I woke up and was happy there was no actual drama going on.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Slept for.. 7 hours? So we're still good. I'm good anyways, I have no idea why I can keep the schedule just fine but the others struggle so much. No particular willpower here, I just went to sleep at midnight and woke up at 7 AM. As in at that point I didn't feel like I could go back to sleep very easily, obviously woke up plenty throughout the night. Speaking of, I appreciate the fact that I can say that and it not be a bad thing. Waking up briefly, periodically through the night is preferable, for me. Less like I'm just knocked out for ~9 hours and more like I'm, you know, resting. Also helps with everything this thread is about.

 

Going to sleep within the next half hour.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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It's your discipline. I find it quite impressive. You win the mind over matter award.

 

Actually, given your large differences, I frequently wonder why you favour the one mind, different personalities model over the one head, different minds model for tulpas.

Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.

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Our "model" is just how it actually is. Your understanding (and our explanation) of "our model" on the other hand, is probably off. We may reference ourselves as "personalities" sometimes, but we also add ", patterns of thinking, mannerisms and everything else that makes you "you"." We're completely independent, wholesome people. What you're referring to has nothing to do with our identities, but the way our mind works. Our style of thinking - multiple minds or one mind - is how we say it is. I can tell you for a fact I don't have my own "working-mind" when not switched. I can think normally just fine, but I can't visualize things or do advanced calculations - without sharing the same part of the mind whoever is fronting normally has control of. To that extent I can actually think just fine, it's not hard to direct the working-mind even when not switched. However, there's only one. Parallel processing, if we could do it, would only be some form of using that mind in multiple ways at once, not separate minds. Maybe you could hypothetically split up the parallel-processing-mind into "separate minds", but that's nothing like what most tulpas who say they can think independent of their hosts have. First, it would be impossible to not know on some level what the others were thinking, though you could suspension-of-disbelief/convince yourself to act and think as if you can't. Pretending this was something anyone's capable of doing. Second, I know the majority of tulpas don't work like this because even the "parallel processors" struggle to do non-basic math independent of the host's thinking. Just becoming proficient at those calculations proves nothing, as the goal is to utilize conscious, creative thinking, not to perform a specific task you've learned to do without effort.

 

Anyways, just talking "probably"s with all that, we don't tend to claim anyone else's minds work a certain way. Can't know that. But it's not how ours works, that's for sure. We might be able to learn very slight parallel processing with a lot of practice, but I feel like we'd be overall less efficient when thinking that way, and we're a fairly open system with thoughts and feelings so we wouldn't impose a veil between the processes to pretend we didn't know what the others were thinking. Also, no way would we ever be able to have more than two thought processes going at the same time, and if we (or anyone at all) could it would likely severely impact the efficiency of them all. Without some monk-on-a-mountaintop training anyway.

 

We don't have a concept of "minds". The "personalities" you mentioned collectively refer to everything that makes us us. Better to call them identities though, as personality is only one of the factors to them. Ways of thinking is an important one. That's why we seem so different when switched, because we literally are. Within reasonable limits of a single human brain, we think very differently from each other, to a very basic level I've found. Unconscious, ~instinctual reactions (that we observed consciously afterward) have completely differed between us, which would be proof if it weren't still "take our word for it".

 

Point is, we each think in a normal sense on our own, but the "working mind" as we call it that handles complicated and creative thinking is shared between us, defaulting to control by the one fronting. But after seven years it's not hard for those not fronting to "direct" it too. I say direct because we aren't arresting control, it's just our input making it do/imagine/process things instead of the one fronting's, et cetera.

 


 

Slept 9 hours, woke up at 6:45 AM. Going to sleep at a normal (or early, by our standards) time basically removes the urge to sleep in when we wake up. Going to sleep at 10PM or 1AM makes the difference in being able to sleep for 9 hours or 12 hours. I think I only made it a few days in last time before switching with Lucilyn, who was immediately unable to keep it up. She might have just stayed up too late, I'm not sure, but the assumption was that the body was tired of not sleeping as much as it wanted by that point and tried to make up hours. However, we only would've said that if we weren't getting 9 hours a night, I think it was more around 6-7 consistently. So I'm interested in seeing if anything like that happens this time, or if as long as I keep going to sleep between 9 and 10 I keep waking up around 6:45 (specifically, apparently) without hassle.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Woke up around 6:33, but went back to sleep until 7:30 ish after like 10 minutes of teetering on wanting to get up/wanting to sleep more. It's about to be 11PM, but Right-Now-Me doesn't really care what Morning-Me feels, I'm getting up at 7AM or within 20 minutes less of that time regardless.

 

Don't know what to say about dreams, been distracted by sleep timing honestly. Active dream recall and waking up early? Well, why not. Let's play a "This time" card and do it because I said so hm? Just because it doesn't work forever doesn't mean I can't still do it.

[video=youtube]

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Slept 7 1/2 hours. One of my dreams was "deleted from memory" within three seconds of me waking up. For some reason I've been waking up very quickly recently, to the point where I go from dream to being aware that I'm opening my eyes and waking up. And one of my dreams became impossible to recall within a moment of that happening. Others more reasonably not so and I could remember the things that had literally just happened. Don't know what to say about waking up, I woke up after implying in a dream that it was like 2AM and a dream character said "No way, it's so much later than that." But as I lay there with my eyes more closed than open trying to wake up mentally if not physically, I fell back ~asleep for like ten minutes, same as yesterday. I don't feel like it's wrong to want to do that, though I need to do something physically that doesn't require getting out of bed to at least anchor my mind. Not sure what that could be. Music maybe, though headphones aren't terribly comfortable while lying down.

 

I'm intending for the body to actually be tired at 9PM like it's supposed to be by waking up after 7 hours of sleep, but I don't know if it cares. Yet. Our body's big on "making up sleep", which was apparently proven to officially be a thing when done within a few days, because of Lumi's past of staying up late to avoid having to wake up years ago. So I'm still waiting to see if it's going to decide it's time to sleep for real or not. Unfortunately, that sleep won't come the morning after, but the night before going to sleep again. That's how you keep a schedule I suppose.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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After spending like two hours being awake wait asleep no awake wait I just had a dream, I realized how I can keep myself from falling back asleep without immediately getting out of bed. Just have to lie on my back. So stupidly simple I didn't even think of it until I was getting up. Can't really fall asleep lying on our back, and even if we did it wouldn't be deep sleep.

 

Dreams are fairly hit or miss for some reason, throughout the night. I remember some sometimes in the first two hours of sleep (even in the first hour), then I won't remember them like four to five hours in, then I will again after six. I don't know why. As I said before, I literally witnessed a dream being deleted from my memory the moment I woke up. Other times it just doesn't happen, and I'm not sure yet what makes the difference.

 

If anything, I think I'm more interested in studying the nature of our dream recall than specifically improving it right now. Dream recall will always be a temporary thing eventually interrupted by changing environment or circumstances. Gaining it back however is something we might be able to improve on.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Going to sleep a little late but not waking up too late either. Lying on my back works more or less, but I still need to want to get up in the first place. Actually more concerned with dream recall though, I forgot basically all of them last night. Let's not do that again.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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