advice needed

[SeekingMyPlanet]

I'm new too, but I'll try to address your concerns. Haven't read other responses, so apologies if there is duplication.

 

6 hours ago, teajoy said:

I don't like the whole idea of switching, I really don't feel like sharing my body with anyone, even with a headmate, but doesn't it make it unfair for them?

I felt this way at the beginning. But after I got to know Lavender and we switched a few times, I love watching her enjoy our body. That said, if she thought I didn't want her to switch, she wouldn't do it.

 

6 hours ago, teajoy said:

Also, the "it gets old thing". I've read enough to understand that it will get old and all, but what if it gets so old and straight up bad for me and my tulpa after some years that we will start hating each other? What if they'll want to take control like some sort of Johnny Silverhand from cyberpunk 2077? And after a few years, I've heard, dissipating them is borderline impossible. And I know how it sounds, I know killing tulpa is the same as killing a person, but if it gets bad, I want to be sure I'll be able to, uh, make it out alive and out of my local psych ward.

Killing a tulpa is impossible. It is however, possible to absorb your tulpa into yourself so you become one personality (not that I ever tried it, or would). Yes, creating a tulpa is a one-way street. You'll never be the same, but merging with a tulpa, especially if that's what you decide to do need not be troublesome. But Lavender would never want to be the cause of any problems for me, so if it came to pass that we hated each other, she would be highly motivated to fix things. Remember, your tulpa is formed as a piece of you, and will always have a special connection with you.

 

6 hours ago, teajoy said:

Also, how do yall deal with personal relationships? I mean, what if I there's ever a person I really love, but my tulpa hates them. Or, like, the person would have to find out that I have a tulpa and they might not be very fond of the idea there isn't just the two of us, but a third person inside my head.

This is a challenge. There are some people in my life I would never tell about Lavender because I know they would be jealous or would think I've gone off the deep end. My sister knows and is very supportive as does another friend.

 

My tulpa supports my forming relationships and would not stand in the way.

 

Good luck. I hope you get what you're looking for.

[Misha]

On 1/26/2024 at 8:29 AM, teajoy said:

What are the differences between integration/demotion and dissipation? 

 

On 1/26/2024 at 8:33 AM, ringgggg said:

Integration is when you merge your tulpa with yourself, dissipation is when you make a tulpa go dormant from inattention indefinitely, until you give them attention again

 

Yes though dissipation is a little harsher than dormancy, which is more like what Ringgggg described. The difference being that if you intend to dissipate someone you don’t intend to ever bring them back. The end result is how he described though, they are never fully gone.

 

So then demotion would be the realization that a headmate isn't really a tulpa and is just a character. They never fully became self aware or chose dormancy or in the case of soulbonds, their canon, over living as a headmate.