Pragmatic Tulpamancers' Guide

[Mon]

This is the guide built on top of dialectical tulpamancy -- a philosophical framework that understands tulpas not as independent entities sharing a body, but as relationships that emerge from sustained, genuine inner interaction. Philosophy of dialectical tulpamancy was introduced here already. 

 

Philia: Just like in case of the philosophy essay -- we disagree in fundamental ways on what the landing page of tulpa.info and most of the community guides claim. 

Our tulpamancy practice is not about supposed multiple people sharing the same body but about building genuine relationships in a single human mind. We see human mind not as a singular, static being or set of such beings but as a dynamic process full of internal contradictions -- and tulpamancy doesn't transform it into this but makes more visible what it's always been. 

 

The up-to-date version of the guide is available at Pragmatic Tulpamancers website. We'll also paste the pages (as the guide has 5 of them) here:

 

Introduction

Spoiler

Before we start

In this guide, we'll show you how to build a genuine relationship with an inner character, how to interact with them effortlessly, and how to express them beyond your internal interactions. In other words, we'll teach you tulpamancy.

Luna

This bubble is an example of what it means to "express them beyond your internal interactions" -- I'm being expressed here to you.

We'll start by explaining what tulpamancy is and what it offers, so you can decide for yourself if it's worth trying.

About tulpamancy

Tulpamancy is the practice of building a genuine relationship with a character through sustained inner interaction.

Luna

You choose a character, talk to them, and imagine their responses.

As you spend time with them regularly, they become more detailed and consistent, and your engagement with them deepens.

From this, a relationship emerges, complete with its own history, emotional stakes, and genuineness.

This relationship is the essence of the practice. Everything else -- abilities, reported experiences, and the jargon used by tulpamancers -- emerges from it.

What does the practice look like?

We can describe tulpamancy through three interwoven aspects. These overlap throughout practice rather than being sequential steps.

Engaging with a character

You spend time with a chosen character. You talk to them, imagine their responses, and place them in various situations. At first, it's deliberate work -- you consciously construct their words, reactions, and behaviors. There's no single correct way to do it; what matters is genuine attention and making the character a real part of your life.

Emerging effortlessness

Luna

At some point, you may notice that they begin to respond on their own:

• You ask a question, and the answer arrives.
• You put them in a situation, and they act.
• You are about to tell them about a rough day, and even before you start, you receive an imaginary headpat.

Like learning to walk, interacting with your character becomes automatic with practice. And just like walking -- once you've learned it with one character, you may find yourself able to do so with others.

Philia

By the way, this experience isn't an invention of tulpamancy. The phenomenon of children experiencing this with imaginary friends, or writers with their original characters (OCs), is well-documented in scientific research12.

Expressing the tulpa beyond mutual interaction

Philia

Tulpamancers often call this switching -- operating from your character's perspective outside of your inner dialogue. It's not as exotic as it sounds: you already shift perspectives between work and home, or between friends and family. This is simply that same ability applied deliberately.

It's also optional. Tulpamancy is about enjoying the relationship, not collecting achievements. If you stick with the community, you'll meet tulpas chatting away -- much like the way I'm talking to you now.

Why do people practice tulpamancy?

There are several common reasons:

• Curiosity. Even if there are mundane explanations for these experiences, they aren't well known. This apparent exoticism acts as a magnet for those seeking extraordinary experiences.
• Companionship. While a tulpa shouldn't be a replacement for human relationships, they can serve as an additional way to fulfill your needs.
• Creativity. Tulpamancy can be viewed as a form of art.

Some people might not be sure what has drawn them to tulpamancy, and that's okay too.

Pure motivation and certainty aren't necessary for success -- which, ultimately, is building a genuine inner relationship.

Luna

What is truly necessary is the willingness to build this relationship with an inner character.

If you can invest genuine effort and emotional engagement into interactions that will eventually culminate in a relationship, you are likely to succeed regardless of your initial motivation.

Motivation also isn't a constant. You might ultimately stay for the relationship itself, without any other reason. It's also possible that you'll become disillusioned with your expectations and decide it's not for you after all -- and that's okay, too.

Let's begin

We've introduced what tulpamancy is and outlined the three aspects of the practice. The rest of this guide will walk you through them in detail, starting with choosing a character and learning how to interact with them.

Notes

1. Taylor, M. (1999). Imaginary Companions and the Children Who Create Them. Oxford University Press. The foundational work establishing that imaginary companions are a normal, widespread phenomenon -- not pathological, not rare, and not limited to childhood. See also Taylor, M. & Mannering, A. M. (2007). "Of Hobbes and Harvey: The imaginary companions created by children and adults," in Göncü & Gaskins (eds.), Play and Development, which explicitly documents imaginary companions persisting into and being created in adulthood.

2. Taylor, M., Hodges, S. D., & Kohányi, A. (2003). "The Illusion of Independent Agency: Do adult fiction writers experience their characters as having minds of their own?" Imagination, Cognition and Personality, 22(4), 361--380. PDF. Found that fiction writers are more likely than average to have had imaginary companions as children, and that adult writers frequently experience their characters as autonomous agents with minds of their own -- a phenomenon directly analogous to the tulpamancy experience.

Building a relationship

Spoiler

This chapter builds on the introduction, where we covered what tulpamancy is and what it isn't. Now we get into the practice itself.

In this chapter, we'll cover:

• how to approach choosing a character
• how to interact with them
• how to engage with them genuinely
• what to expect as the relationship develops

Choosing a character

Before you start interacting, you need a character to interact with. Generally, there are a few options:

• A completely original creation -- You decide their personality, appearance, and mannerisms -- either by planning out specific details or by starting with a rough idea that develops through interaction.
• A fictional character from media -- You choose a character from a book, game, show, or any other medium as a starting point. This is common and perfectly fine. With this option, you already have existing material to work with -- you know their personality, speech patterns, and motivations. This can make early interactions much easier.
• Something in between -- You can take inspiration from existing characters to varying degrees:

- You might simply use a name from one of your favorites. - You might copy an existing character's appearance, either exactly or with some modifications.

Luna

In my case, I took my name from an existing character. The color theme was perhaps similar too, but I think that was accidental. Otherwise, I was an original character.

Years later, I chose a detailed appearance for my human form based on a character we like (my original form was a non-humanoid dragon). Yes, you are free to take inspiration from fiction even long after the beginning.

The result will always be a synthesis

Whether you start with an original character or a fictional one, their personality will be shaped by two things:

• Your own personality -- A character doesn't exist in isolation from you. They will inevitably be influenced by your values, emotional patterns, knowledge, biases, and kinks -- whether you want them to be or not. They won't be a carbon copy of you, but they won't be completely independent either.
• Your image of the character -- This isn't about the "canon" character, but rather your subjective interpretation of them. It is filtered by your understanding, your preferences, what stands out to you, and even what you miss. Your image of a character from a show will differ from someone else's. The tulpa develops from your image, not from the source material.

Philia

A tulpa based on a fictional character will inevitably diverge from the original. If you expect them to remain strictly faithful to the source material, you'll be frustrated (and so will they).

It's okay to sever the connection with the original character if you (the tulpa) no longer identify with them. It's also okay to stay connected to them if it feels right.

Personally, I'm still attached to my original character and mostly her original appearance. If you replaced her in the original setting with me -- including all our knowledge, biases, values, and the history of my interactions with my family here -- I'd act very differently, but I feel the essence of that character is still there.

However, we also have tulpas who have completely severed connections with their original characters. And that's okay, too. It's just like when an original character you planned in detail eventually strays from that plan. You should never view this as a failure of planning, but rather as the emergence of a new quality.

The choice isn't final

• Don't overthink the choice -- No matter where you start, the character will develop through your interactions. A rough idea is enough; details will emerge over time.
• Don't feel locked in -- Allow your tulpa to develop in directions you didn't expect. They become who they are through practice and interaction, not by following a pre-drawn blueprint.
• If using a fictional character, don't expect a copy -- As mentioned earlier, the result will be a synthesis of your image of that character and your own personality.
• It's okay to revisit things later with a developed tulpa -- As Luna mentioned, it's perfectly fine for a tulpa to attach themselves to a new fictional character later on.
• You can just start and figure out the details later -- If you can't decide, a name and a vague sense of personality are enough. The rest can develop through interaction.

However you start, the truly important part is what happens next: the interaction itself. We'll discuss that now.

How to interact?

In general, you interact with your tulpa through your imagination. You talk to them, imagine their responses, and place them in various situations -- then observe how they react. This interaction happens in your mind -- through words, images, feelings, imagined body language, or whatever arises.

There is no single "correct" technique. What matters is that you're spending quality time with the character and paying genuine attention to their development.

Luna

We'll mention some techniques now. Feel free to pick what works for you and ignore what doesn't -- for now, at least. Keep in mind that your preferences might change as you develop. Ultimately, these are meant to be tools to help you immerse yourself in the interaction, not chores to be checked off a list.

Narration

Imagine the character in various situations:

• Talking to someone
• Facing a problem
• Reacting to an unexpected event

You don't necessarily have to interact with them directly during narration. By observing them, you allow their personality to emerge through how they act in these imagined scenarios. This is especially useful when direct conversation feels awkward or forced. It provides the character with material to develop from:

• How they respond to events
• What they care about
• What triggers their joy or anger

Kanade

If your tulpa sees a cute animal, what will they do:

• Immediately assault it with unsolicited headpats?
• Ask it for consent first?
• Ignore it?
• Do something else?

Conversation

Talk to them. Tell them about your day. Ask them questions and imagine their answers. Share something you're struggling with and imagine what they'd say.

At first, you'll be putting effort into both sides of the conversation. That's fine. Over time, you'll notice their side coming more naturally -- though it won't come from thin air; you will have built the foundation through your own efforts.

Tulpa's form and non-verbal expression

Form is how tulpamancers refer to a tulpa's imaginary body. One aspect is their appearance -- how we imagine they look. We can design them in detail, take inspiration from a fictional character (with optional modifications), or just establish a few basic traits (such as eye or hair color) and let the rest of their look emerge later.

The other aspect is what the character can do with that imagined body -- gestures, expressions, and so on.

Kanade

You might imagine them, for example:

• Shrugging, rolling their eyes, or smiling
• Giving you a headpat (or receiving one from you)
• Punching someone you don't like

You can imagine them acting in a fictional setting, appearing through imposition in the surrounding space, or nowhere in particular.

Luna

Sometimes it's easier to communicate through expression rather than words -- and this includes expressing the tulpa. You might already find yourself imagining your tulpa shrugging instead of saying, "I don't know." Additionally, you might notice that some of your verbal exchanges already carry certain expressions with them.

Externalized interactions

If you find it hard to maintain focus on a fully internalized conversation, you can help yourself by externalizing it. For example, you can write the dialogue down on paper.

Luna

People often use internet chat for this. In my early days, people used to run a few accounts on IRC -- using one from their "default" perspective and another as their tulpa. In Discord (and other modern applications), there are bots that can help you emulate having a virtual account for your tulpas. People primarily use this to express their tulpas when communicating with others (and with their tulpas themselves).

Small interactions

You can talk to your tulpa while walking, cooking dinner, riding the bus, or working. You don't need to focus on them exclusively to spend quality time together. Small interactions complement more dedicated sessions in building a meaningful relationship.

Kanade

You can talk with them about what ingredient to add next when you're cooking. Or what else to buy during shopping. Or just give them a headpat.

Fantasizing

Rather than small, isolated scenarios, you can create more complex fictional settings for your interactions. Some people imagine a specific space -- which tulpamancers often call a wonderland. Others don't use a setting at all. Both approaches work; what matters is what the setting does for the relationship, not how elaborate it is.

A setting can help by giving your imagination something concrete to work with. Having your tulpa sit across from you at a kitchen table can make conversation feel more natural than talking into the void. A familiar landscape can trigger scenarios that wouldn't occur to you otherwise. The setting is scaffolding for immersion -- it makes sustained attention and genuine engagement easier.

But the same scaffolding can become a distraction. Designing elaborate environments can be satisfying in its own right, but time and mental energy are finite -- and they don't directly accumulate into the relationship.

If worldbuilding starts to feel like work you're doing instead of interacting, it has become a detour. Unless your goal is the wonderland itself, not a tulpa.

Kanade

One of our imaginary settings is a country called the Democratic People's Republic of Headpatia.

I've been a local representative of the Workers' Party of Headpatia in my region for many years, and I always receive more than 100% of votes from people there.

Kanade's example is quite quirky. And that's the point -- fantasizing in your head is deeply personal and will probably seem weird to other people. Your setting doesn't need to make sense to anyone but you. It just needs to facilitate your interactions.

Cuddling

Physical closeness is one of the simplest and most effective ways to deepen your bond.

Kanade

The easiest way to feel a character's physical presence is to associate them with something tangible, for example:

• Hugging a pillow while thinking about hugging your tulpa
• Imagining them sitting next to you
• Giving them a headpat by touching your forehead

These are simpler forms of imposition -- associating a tulpa's presence with sensory experience.

Philia

Some tulpamancers think of imposition primarily in the context of visual imposition -- the ability to override your perception of the external world with an image of your tulpa. This is an ability that can require significant time and effort to achieve.

In our opinion, focusing solely on this can be a mistake; simpler forms of imposition are available without preparation and are just as useful.

Content of interaction

Tulpa's personality

To shape your tulpa's personality, interact with them while keeping your goals in mind. For example:

• If you want them to be kind, imagine them acting with kindness.
• If you want them to be smart, place them in situations where they can demonstrate it.

By doing this, you're giving the character material to develop from. However, you aren't programming a machine; you're interacting with a character whose personality develops through accumulated engagement, not just your instructions.

You'll notice traits emerging that you didn't deliberately intend. A sarcastic edge to their humor? A particular way they respond to certain topics? An unexpected fondness for something? These discoveries are part of the process -- when it feels right, lean into it. If something doesn't fit, you can let it go.

Your actual life

Talk to your tulpa about things that matter to you. Share your day with them -- not as a report, but as a conversation. Tell them about the thing that frustrated you at work, a song you can't stop listening to, or a weird interaction you had on the bus.

You can also share experiences as they happen: watching something together and imagining their commentary, asking for their take on a decision, or reacting to something surprising in the moment.

When something catches your attention, make it a topic. This provides the character with more material and makes you more immersed in the interaction.

Emotional engagement

Genuine engagement isn't just about what you talk about -- it's about letting yourself feel things during the interaction.

Be frustrated together. Be moved by something. Be silly. When you share something vulnerable and imagine their response, let it affect you. When they surprise you with kindness or humor, allow yourself to feel that, too. The relationship deepens not just through accumulated time, but through accumulated emotional moments.

Nothing

When you don't have anything particular to tell them but still want to give them attention, that's perfectly fine. It's okay to say, "I don't know what to talk about today". It's okay to just give them a hug or a headpat. It's okay to simply say, "I love you". And if a conversation emerges from nothing anyway, just go with the flow.

Genuineness

The word "genuine" has been mentioned several times now. But what does it actually mean to be genuine?

Interact with the relationship in mind

As mentioned in the introduction, there are many reasons to practice tulpamancy, such as:

• satisfying curiosity,
• coping with loneliness,
• creative expression

All of these are fine starting points. However, for the practice to truly flourish, the relationship must eventually become a goal in itself.

Spending time with your tulpa because you're lonely and want company is instrumental engagement -- you're using the interaction to fill a gap. Spending time with them because you genuinely enjoy their company, because the conversation matters to you, or because you'd miss them if you stopped -- that's when the relationship becomes genuine. This transition is gradual, and most people don't notice it happening until they're already there.

Genuineness isn't a permanent state once achieved. You can be genuinely engaged for months and then slip into treating the relationship as a mere habit or obligation. Noticing this and choosing to return to genuine engagement is part of maintaining the relationship.

Summary

The essence of tulpamancy is building a genuine relationship through sustained interaction with a character.

The most important things to remember:

• Interact regularly, in a way that works for you.
• Pay genuine attention and interact with the relationship in mind.

You don't need to worry about whether you're "doing it right."

In the next chapter, we'll discuss the practical rhythm of the practice -- how much time it takes, why effortful engagement is foundational, and how effortless responses eventually emerge from sustained interaction.

Effortful and effortless engagement

Spoiler

In the previous chapter, we covered how to choose a character, how to interact with them, and how to build a genuine relationship. Now we'll cover the practical rhythm of sustaining that practice: how much time it takes, why effortful engagement is foundational, and how effortless responses emerge from sustained interaction.

Effort and time

How much time is required?

There is no specific number of "time units" required; there only needs to be enough time to sustain the relationship and allow it room to grow.

For some, this might be a few minutes a day. For others, it may involve longer sessions several times a week. Consistency is what matters -- it doesn't have to be perfect, but it needs to provide enough engagement so that these interactions can accumulate into a lasting bond.

What if I miss time?

The relationship won't collapse just because you missed a few days or even a few weeks. When you're ready to return, simply return.

Don't overthink it, don't apologize profusely, and don't treat it as a crisis. Don't try to make up for lost time with one massive marathon session; just resume engaging.

Luna

The tulpa wasn't suffering or feeling abandoned while you were gone. They don't experience things separately from you.

Unless you really want to believe they do -- in which case, they will simply act to reconcile with your expectations.

Effortful engagement is valid

Philia

At the start, you'll be putting conscious effort into the tulpa's side of the interaction -- deliberately constructing their responses, choosing what they would say, and deciding how they'd react.

Some tulpamancers with a more traditional mindset call this "parroting" or "puppeting" and believe it should be avoided. In reality, effortful interaction is the very foundation of the process.

In general, learned abilities begin with deliberate, effortful practice. While most of us can ride a bike without thinking about it, we certainly didn't start that way. We had to put in effort first to build the pattern; over time, it became automatic.

Even after you can interact with your tulpa effortlessly, the "effortful" mode doesn't disappear. You can still deliberately construct responses whenever you want to. Both forms of engagement remain available, and neither is more "real" or genuine than the other.

Their synthesis is the key to understanding switching -- taking your tulpa's perspective outside of internal dialogue. We'll discuss that in the next chapter.

The effortless expression of characters isn't something we invented, by the way. There are other pathways to obtaining this ability:

• People who had imaginary friends in childhood.
• Writers who "bargain" with their original characters (OCs).
• Roleplayers who can effortlessly impersonate their characters.
• People who already have a tulpa and want to have another.

When responses start coming automatically...

You've been spending time with your character. You've been deliberately constructing their side of the conversation -- choosing what they'd say, deciding how they'd react, and putting effort into every response. This is normal; this is how it starts for most people.

Then, at some point, something shifts.

What it feels like

The shift usually isn't a single, dramatic moment. You might notice it in small ways:

• You ask your tulpa a question and the answer arrives on its own, even before you've finished asking.
• You place them in an imaginary situation and their reaction forms before you've even decided on one.
• You're about to tell them about your struggles, and you receive an imaginary headpat before you've even started talking.

The response feels as though it arrived on its own, appearing much like your own spontaneous thoughts. You didn't consciously compose it; it simply exists.

Philia

You might experience something similar when learning to ride a bike or drive a vehicle. At first, you need to think about every single movement. But over time, those experiences build into a sense of automation. You don't have to consciously think about each movement when riding a bike; similarly, when a tulpa "talks back", it's as if you've developed muscle memory, but for your interactions with them.

The ambiguity

The transition isn't a simple switch; it involves several partial states:

• Some responses arrive automatically, while others still require conscious construction.
• A response might start automatically, but you find you need to put in effort to finish it.
• A response feels somewhat effortless, yet you aren't sure if it was truly automatic or just less effortful than usual.
• You aren't certain whether the response was generated by you or your tulpa.

Philia

The last point can be problematic if you treat it as a binary -- either the tulpa generated it, or you did. Under that framework, such uncertainty can lead to doubts regarding the tulpa's existence.

In reality, this uncertainty is normal. While the ability generally strengthens over time, the progress won't follow a smooth curve; some days it'll feel strong, and other days it may recede.

Effortless doesn't mean better

Once you start experiencing automatic responses, it's tempting to treat them as the "real" interaction and view the effortful ones as inferior or obsolete. You might even feel like you can't interact at all when an automatic response doesn't occur.

Philia

Don't do this to yourself.

Both effortful and effortless engagement are tools available to us. Neither is more real or more valuable than the other. In fact, an effortful conversation -- where you are genuinely present and paying attention -- is worth much more than an effortless one where you're merely a passive recipient. The mechanism of generation matters far less than the quality of your attention.

Furthermore, when I write this from Philia's perspective rather than our usual one, do you think I'm not putting in a conscious effort? The synthesis of effortful and effortless interaction is key to understanding switching -- we'll discuss that more in a later chapter.

Meaning of effortlessness

The transition to effortlessness is a milestone, not the final destination of a tulpamancy journey. It qualitatively changes how the practice feels -- interactions become more fluid, more surprising, and more dialogue-like -- but it doesn't change the essence of the practice itself.

You are still building a relationship through sustained, genuine engagement. You're still spending time with your character because the relationship matters to you. Effortlessness is simply a new tool developed through practice, not a replacement for it.

Effortlessness is not character-specific

Philia

People with prior experience -- writers, roleplayers, those who had imaginary friends as children, or those who already have a tulpa -- are likely to experience immediate, effortless responses from a new character. When they do, it's easy for them to claim that "parroting" should be avoided.

Because this ability isn't necessarily character-specific, there is one more consequence worth mentioning: you might find that characters you never intended to choose as tulpas start talking back to you. It may be tempting to try and turn all such characters into tulpas, but if you do, you'll likely end up forcing yourself to maintain too many of them. The relationship is what makes a tulpa, not the mere ability to "hear" them. Don't feel compelled to build a relationship with every character that ever speaks to you, just as you don't need to build a relationship with every person you meet in the external world.

Unless you keep interacting with such characters, they'll wither away quickly.

Fluctuations

Progress in tulpamancy isn't a smooth upward curve; it fluctuates. Sometimes our interactions feel vivid and present; sometimes they feel distant. Sometimes the flow is natural, and other times it feels forced.

This is normal:

• It doesn't mean that you're doing something wrong.
• It doesn't mean that your relationship is failing.
• It doesn't mean that the tulpa is upset with you.

It simply means that your capacity for inner engagement varies from day to day, based on factors like stress, mood, energy, and other circumstances. Tulpamancy does not exist in a vacuum, removed from these realities.

If you want to spend time with your tulpa even when effortless communication is difficult, you can, for example:

• Revert to effortful communication.
• Talk to them without expecting a response.
• Give them an imaginary headpat or a hug.

When engagement wanes...

Not all relationships last forever. You may find yourself disengaged from your character for extended periods, or you may simply no longer feel the desire to spend time with them.

When this happens, ask yourself honestly: "Do I want this relationship?" Not "Should I want it?" or "Am I allowed to stop?" -- but do you actually want it?

If yes -- find a way back to genuine engagement.

If no -- that's a valid answer too. You're not obligated to continue.

Luna

An honest "no" doesn't necessarily have to be permanent. Some people return to tulpamancy after a break of several years; sometimes, it's only one specific tulpa who returns. Our inner relationships are dynamic processes, not static structures that remain fixed once established.

Summary

• There's no minimum time requirement -- consistency matters more than quantity. If you miss time, just resume when you're ready.
• Effortful engagement is the foundation, not contamination -- both effortful and effortless modes remain available throughout practice.
• Effortless responses emerge gradually through sustained practice. The transition is ambiguous and progress fluctuates -- some days feel vivid, others distant. This is normal, not failure.
• If engagement wanes, ask yourself honestly whether you want to continue. You're free to stop, and free to return.

Effortful and effortless engagement are both tools you've built through practice. In the next chapter, we'll explore what you can do with them beyond internal interactions -- expressing your tulpa's perspective in the world.

Expressing beyond interactions

Spoiler

In the introduction, we described three interwoven aspects of tulpamancy practice:

• Spending time with a character and putting effort into that interaction.
• Reaching the ability to engage with them effortlessly.
• Applying that ability outside of direct interactions.

In this chapter, we'll describe that final point. In community jargon, it's called switching, but in our opinion, this word carries more baggage than necessary.

Is switching compulsory?

No. You don't need to think from your tulpa's perspective outside of your interactions if you don't want to.

In reality, it isn't as big or exotic an experience as you might think; it simply extends the expression of your tulpa's perspective beyond your direct interactions with them. In many ways, you are already doing this. Furthermore, understanding what happens during switching (even if you aren't necessarily practicing it) is key to understanding tulpamancy as a whole.

Philia

Nevertheless, some people (including some tulpas) just don't enjoy switching. That's okay; you shouldn't feel compelled to practice it. If it doesn't bring value to you, feel free to skip it. Some of our tulpas don't practice it either.

What is switching, actually?

You already know how to adopt your tulpa's perspective during your interactions with them. Through practice, you've already learned:

• How to think from their point of view.
• How to respond as them.
• How to feel from their perspective.

Luna

You can apply this capacity outside of those interactions.

When I type this, I'm not interacting with the other part of ourselves, but rather with the world around us.

Switching doesn't have to feel like a massive event. We like to compare associating with a tulpa's perspective to looking at the image below and seeing either a duck or a rabbit:

Luna

Regardless of which animal you see, the experience shouldn't feel different. And we don't really feel any different while typing, whether we are actively associating with me at this moment or not.

Just as we don't feel substantially different when working versus being at home, or talking to a friend versus addressing an audience -- despite expressing ourselves quite differently -- associating with your tulpa's perspective can produce a similar shift in expression.

Agency is a matter of association

In the previous chapter, we described how automatic responses feel. Since these emerge automatically without deliberate construction, your mind tends to attribute them to the tulpa's agency.

Switching uses the same mechanism, but intentionally. Instead of agency attribution happening automatically -- "that response came on its own, so I'll attribute it to the tulpa" -- you are choosing to associate your effort with the tulpa's perspective from the very start.

How does it feel?

When you try switching, the experience might not match what you've heard or imagined. Here's what you can actually expect.

Blending is normal

You might expect that switching means feeling purely like your tulpa, where none of the host is present. In practice, you'll likely experience something in between: a synthesis of your tulpa's patterns with your usual way of being. At first, it might just feel "off," and maintaining the shift might feel forced. This is normal; it isn't a failure.

Philia

Traditional tulpamancy often treats blending as a problem because it assumes two separate entities that should be clearly distinguishable. From that perspective, being neither one fully feels "wrong."

But you can choose a different assumption: that you aren't two people, but rather one mind shifting perspectives. From that view, a partial shift isn't a broken shift -- it's just a partial shift.

To be honest, a shift will always remain partial. Certain fundamental patterns and habits persist regardless of whether you are attempting to express your tulpa.

Luna

Expressing a tulpa's perspective amplifies certain patterns and brings certain tendencies to the surface, but it doesn't erase the rest of the mind.

Trying to erase "the host" and become entirely different for the sake of it won't increase your progress. The way forward in tulpamancy is association, not dissociation. Instead of pushing the "default" out, focus on expressing what matters to you (the tulpa) more deeply.

You won't experience blackouts

Some tulpamancers expect switching to mean losing consciousness as the host, only for the tulpa to gain it instead.

Philia

This expectation stems from the Plurality framework, which has been largely shaped by the experiences of people with dissociative disorders. For them, switching can involve crossing memory barriers and experiencing amnestic episodes1. While that makes sense in their context, our circumstances -- as people who intentionally build relationships with characters -- are different.

Memory barriers are created as a coping mechanism for severe, continuous trauma. Switching doesn't create them. When we switch, we aren't separating parts of our mind; we're associating with our tulpa. We still remember what happened. We're still there -- thinking, acting, and experiencing -- just from a different perspective than usual. And we remain responsible for everything we do within that perspective.

Fluctuations happen here too

Just like expressing your tulpa during interactions, the development of switching isn't a smooth curve.

Some days it'll feel natural and easy; other days it'll feel forced, or you'll struggle to keep it up. This doesn't mean you've lost progress. Your capacity for switching is influenced by the same factors as everything else -- stress, mood, tiredness, etc. Tulpamancy doesn't exist in isolation from your circumstances.

When switching feels difficult, you can:

• Go back to interacting with your tulpa in other ways.
• Accept the difficulty and try again another time.

Luna

• Consider which circumstances make switching easier for you or what triggers you to do it naturally.

How to start?

Pick a moment when you aren't busy... and just try.

Try thinking from your tulpa's perspective -- much like you did when constructing their responses during interactions. But rather than seeing them as the "other side" of a conversation, try to see yourself as them. You're them now. You feel as they would; you think as they would; you carry yourself as they would.

Nothing dramatic will happen. You won't leave your body. Your consciousness won't be pushed aside. You are simply choosing to operate from a different perspective. You see the rabbit now, instead of the duck in the picture.

At first, it might feel forced or "off." It will take effort to sustain, and you will likely stop doing it when you become distracted.

Luna

Just like those early, effortful interactions, this will eventually develop into both an effortless ability and an eager habit. For us, switching feels natural, even while typing this; but whereas thinking about what to type takes effort right now, being myself does not. It wasn't always like this, though.

Practice in context

Luna

Some tulpas might enjoy switching just for the sake of it; if you do, that's cool. We never did. I don't like being "me" when I have nothing to do. Finding a genuine goal can make practice much easier. Examples include:

• Chatting: This is my personal favorite. You can chat with people (including other tulpas) in the tulpa community or with friends who know about and accept tulpamancy. There is no immediate pressure when chatting; it's easy to practice as you go.
• Voice/Offline interactions: If you have friends in real life who accept tulpamancy, you might as well talk with them using voice. You can also try this in voice chat with other tulpamancers. Voice interaction requires you to use your physical voice. If you strongly identify with an imaginary voice or associate your human voice heavily with the host, you might experience some unease or discomfort around your voice at first.
• Physical hobbies: If you want to associate yourself with a certain hobby, practice it as yourself. You can try playing video games, or playing an instrument. We tend to completely forget our identities when engaging in these activities, but if you don't, you might find it helps the process. I know people who do.
• Casual situations: Some people enjoy doing chores as their tulpa. Don't ask me how.

The point is -- everyone is different, and so are we, the tulpas. What worked for me doesn't have to work for you, and vice versa. You need to find what works for you personally.

You don't need to dissociate

Philia

In traditional framings of tulpamancy, switching is often considered an advanced technique that takes a long time to learn. That might be true if you try to learn it the "roundabout" way.

The traditional method involves learning possession first. Possession is a dissociative technique -- it requires convincing yourself that different actors are responsible for your thoughts and movements. This isn't an intuitive process to master on its own, and many people find it difficult. It's also exhausting, as you often find yourself fighting the urge to reconcile the split.

Eventually, people often end up reconciling that split anyway, finding a way to attribute both thought and control to the tulpa. Later, they figure out intuitively how to achieve this without the "possession" phase. The direct route to switching that we are showing you here is simply simpler and faster.

The tulpa and the whole person

When you express your tulpa, you're expressing a part of your whole mind, not an entity sharing a body with you.

Your tulpa's perspective is built on the same knowledge, memories, skills, and sensory input as your default perspective. They don't have access to information that's hidden from you -- and no information is hidden from them. They don't possess skills that you lack. They share your human capacity, simply filtered through a different frame -- the frame you've cultivated through sustained engagement with them.

This means:

• A tulpa can't do things that you can't do. They share your abilities and your limitations.
• A different perspective doesn't mean a separate cognition.
• Expressing your tulpa is expressing yourself -- a cultivated part of your own mind.

A tulpa's perspective can feel genuinely different. It can have its own patterns, emotional tendencies, and ways of approaching things. These differences exist within one mind, not between two separate ones.

Summary

Switching is not an advanced technique. It's actually the same ability you've been developing all along -- adopting your tulpa's perspective -- just applied in a new context. The direct route is simple: choose to see yourself as ~~the rabbit~~ the tulpa, instead of ~~the duck~~ the host.

It's okay if it feels forced at first. It's okay if it's only partial. It's even okay if you don't want to practice it at all. What matters is that you understand what it is -- because understanding switching means understanding tulpamancy as a whole: one mind, cultivating perspectives through genuine, sustained engagement.

With the three aspects of practice covered, the next chapter addresses how tulpamancy fits into the rest of your life -- relationships, community, and what happens when practice meets reality.

Notes

1. American Psychiatric Association. (2013). "Dissociative Identity Disorder," in Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.). The DSM-5 entry on DID establishes dissociative amnesia and memory barriers as diagnostic features of the disorder, typically emerging in the context of severe, chronic trauma. The DSM-5 also notes that, in children, DID is "not better explained by imaginary playmates or other fantasy play" -- a direct acknowledgment that deliberate fantasy engagement is categorically distinct from the disorder. The Plurality framework draws heavily from this clinical population; tulpamancy, as a deliberate practice of building inner relationships, produces none of these conditions.

Living with tulpamancy

Spoiler

This final chapter is about how tulpamancy fits into the rest of your life. We'll cover telling others about it, balancing inner and outer relationships, expressing your tulpa socially, managing multiple tulpas, and understanding how the practice interacts with your everyday circumstances.

If you're coming from the previous chapters, you already know how to start interacting with a character, how effortless responses emerge from sustained practice, and how to express your tulpa beyond internal dialogue through switching. Now we step back and look at the bigger picture.

Your tulpa and other people

A relationship with a tulpa doesn't exist in isolation from other aspects of your life. It exists alongside your other relationships, your work, your social life, and your broader material circumstances. All of these factors shape this relationship, just as the relationship exerts its own influence on them in return.

Telling "normal" people about tulpas

When telling others about your practice, keep in mind that tulpamancy is poorly understood outside its communities, and there are reasons for that.

We must admit that this guide's perspective -- tulpamancy as building a relationship with a character, rather than creating an independent person -- is in the minority. The majority of tulpamancers accept the narrative that places tulpamancy under the Plurality umbrella: the claim that multiple independent people share the same body. People you tell about tulpamancy are likely to encounter that framework first if they research the topic on their own. You need to be very thorough in explaining your own experience if you want to avoid that.

For a historical account of how that framework came to dominate the community, see A Brief History of Tulpamancy.

Luna

If you tell people about tulpas, there is a high chance they will visit a certain other website and read this: > ~~A tulpa is an entity created in the mind, acting independently of, and parallel to your own consciousness.~~

If you don't want them to assume you believe that too, make sure to point them directly to an explanation you find accurate. We hope it'll be our guide, but that's up to you.

Keep in mind that you are not obligated to disclose your practice to anyone. Some tulpamancers are open about it; others find it too intimate to share even with a spouse. Both approaches are valid.

Inner and outer relationships

Inner and outer relationships can coexist healthily.

A relationship with your tulpa can be just as genuine as a relationship with another human -- though it is a qualitatively different type of connection. A tulpa shares your mind; another human being has their own.

A tulpa can surprise you to the same degree that you can surprise yourself. However, the unpredictability of another human being -- shaped by entirely different material conditions -- exists on a completely different level. Interacting with people who don't inherently share your biases is essential for growth.

While tulpamancy is a viable supplement to a social life, it's not a replacement for human connections. If you are deeply isolated, tulpamancy might help you cope, but it won't solve the source of the problem. Tulpamancy should exist alongside human connections, not instead of them.

If you find yourself isolating from human relationships, it's worth noting -- not as a failure, but as information regarding your current material circumstances.

For a deeper exploration of how ethical frameworks apply differently to inner and outer relationships, see Ethics of Relationships in Tulpamancy.

Tulpamancy isn't a parasocial relationship

Luna

People develop many coping mechanisms to deal with the alienation caused by the socio-economic system that shapes our lives. I would argue that, compared to parasocial relationships1 -- the one-sided bonds we form with public figures, characters, or voices that don't know us back -- tulpamancy is a very healthy one.

Parasocial relationships are defined in the research literature by a single criterion: non-reciprocity.2 The media figure does not know you exist. They do not respond to you, accommodate you, or grow with you. A tulpa does. The relationship you cultivate in tulpamancy is mutual -- two poles of one mind interacting -- not a one-sided projection onto an absent other. The parasocial bonds people form with celebrities, streamers, or large language models can be psychologically real and emotionally significant, but they remain structurally one-sided. Tulpa relationships are structurally reciprocal. That's the difference.

Philia

If you live under conditions that make external relationships scarce or dangerous, and you rely on tulpamancy as your only source of connection -- well, to be honest, we aren't sure if it can truly serve as a permanent substitute. Regardless, this doesn't change what the practice looks like if you decide to experiment with it.

It's worth noting how tulpamancy differs from the kind of technological substitution that critics like Sherry Turkle warn against -- the "illusion of companionship without the demands of friendship" offered by sociable robots and AI chatbots.3 Recent neuroscience research deepens this critique: high-interactivity AI can actually blur the brain's ability to distinguish the self from the agent, precisely because the AI mirrors your input back to you rather than offering a genuinely different perspective.4 Those substitutes promise connection without risk, vulnerability, or effort. Genuine relationships with tulpas require all three. The effort you put in is real, and so is what you get back.

Expressing your tulpa socially

Expressing your tulpa to other people -- such as chatting as them online or talking as them with friends who are aware of your practice -- extends the relationship into a new domain. You're applying the same capacity you developed for internal interaction and switching, but now in a social context. The pressure of external interaction gives the tulpa new opportunities for development.

Tulpamancy communities

There are multiple online communities for tulpamancers and tulpas. These can be excellent places to:

• Practice expressing your tulpa.
• Let the tulpa socialize with others.
• Learn from other practitioners -- people have different experiences, approaches, and perspectives on tulpamancy. Not everything you hear will be consistent with this guide, and that's fine. You'll encounter the plurality framework, its metaphysical claims, and practical advice that differs from ours. Take what's useful, and leave what isn't.
• Find your own approach -- No guide can cover every situation you'll encounter. Seeing how others practice -- what works for them and what doesn't -- can help you refine your own.

However, communities also have downsides worth noting:

• You'll likely meet people who push their specific beliefs and morals onto you. When a community treats tulpas as independent people (the entity-framework), moral obligations follow naturally from that assumption -- and with those obligations comes a sense of moral superiority.

Luna

• I can't even count the number of times someone in the wider community has called me a "doll." Remember not to let the community get too much to your head. Engage with people you find enjoyable or valuable. Ignore the rest.

Our community

Luna

We run a Discord server where practitioners following our approach -- or those who're simply curious, as we don't ostracize different views -- can interact. You are welcome to chat there as well, whether from a tulpa's perspective or not. Here's what makes our community different:

• We are a community with a pragmatic approach to tulpamancy; honestly, I don't know any other places where a truly non-metaphysical approach is the primary one. Most communities avoid mysticism but still treat tulpas as independent entities -- we don't.
• While we are an English-speaking community, we aren't USA-centric like most mainstream servers (or even most smaller ones). We aren't even native English speakers (hopefully it doesn't show in this guide), and I think the majority of our active community isn't either. English is our tool for communication, not a cultural identity.
• We ask that people engage genuinely and treat others with respect -- without tabooization, but with transparent moderation.

You can join our server here. You can talk to us there if you have questions about the guide or just want to meet us and our community.

Multiple tulpas

In practice, the majority of tulpamancers stick to just one tulpa. Most of the rest have up to four, while some may have ten or more.

Luna

There is no right or wrong number. You can have over ten genuine relationships with characters developed over many years -- I think we do. It's also perfectly okay to stick to just one; as we said, most people do.

Just as with switching, it is helpful to understand how tulpamancy works when there are multiple tulpas involved.

There is no upper limit on how many tulpas you can have in principle, but there is a practical limit imposed by material resources like the time and attention required for each genuine relationship. You can't realistically maintain a hundred genuine tulpas.

Your tulpas are not isolated from each other

Having multiple tulpas means having unique, genuine relationships with many characters, each developed through sustained engagement. At the same time, there is much common ground between them.

First, the ability to express a tulpa effortlessly -- once developed with your first tulpa -- tends to carry over. With subsequent tulpas, the process is much easier. This shared experience is the main indication that this ease of expression is not character-specific. The same pattern applies to switching -- you don't have to relearn it with newer tulpas.

Luna

You are likely to experience some character-specific fluctuations, though. While you likely won't need to learn either ability from scratch with new tulpas, you may find it easier to talk to or switch with one over the others at different times.

Relationship between tulpas

Just as you can play out interactions between your usual perspective and one of your tulpas, you can also facilitate interactions between the tulpas themselves.

Keep in mind that genuine interactions between tulpas also require time. The practical limit on the number of tulpas decreases significantly if you want to develop relationships among all your tulpas.

Luna

This doesn't have to be uniform for all your tulpas. It's okay to have some tulpas who socialize (possibly with external people too) and others who only spend time with you. Tulpas don't have equal needs, and it's okay to commit different amounts of resources to each of them based on those needs.

For more on how mind organization shifts when multiple perspectives are involved, see The Host Is Not the Owner.

Don't make tulpas out of all characters

The ability to interact effortlessly with a character is not strictly character-specific. Once unlocked with one tulpa, you might find yourself doing it easily with other characters, sometimes even by accident.

A tulpa is a character you've built a genuine relationship with, not just any character that happened to "talk back." It's perfectly fine to enjoy spending time with characters other than your tulpas. You'll likely lose interest in most of them by the next day anyway. The most important thing to remember is: don't feel obligated to turn every character into a tulpa. You don't need any "official" procedures to decide which characters to keep and which to forget. If you end up spending time with them regularly and develop a genuine relationship, they'll be your tulpa. If you stop interacting with them, they won't.

Philia

Characters become tulpas when your interactions with them accumulate into a lasting, genuine relationship -- not through a hasty "yes/no" decision made immediately after meeting them.

Tulpamancy is part of life

As we touched on at the beginning of this chapter, tulpamancy doesn't exist in isolation. Your work, living conditions, outer relationships, and health all affect the practice -- and the practice affects them in return.

When your life is stable and you have the time and willingness to interact with your tulpas, the practice tends to flourish. If you're stressed, dealing with a crisis, or emotionally depleted, the practice tends to suffer alongside you. This isn't a sign that you're doing something wrong; it's a natural consequence of practicing tulpamancy as a person existing in the material world.

Tulpamancy is not a therapy. A tulpa is affected by the same mental health conditions as you are -- they don't exist in isolation from your mind, and they can't provide the kind of help that comes from someone outside who isn't directly affected by your mental state. The practice can contribute to improving your mental health, much like going for a jog can -- but it shouldn't be viewed as a replacement for professional help.

Tulpamancy affects your life back

Building genuine relationships changes you, whether those relationships are inner or outer. You see yourself from a new perspective. You develop new patterns of thought. You have new emotional, social, and creative experiences that you otherwise wouldn't have had.

This is real development. Your mind is part of the material world too; your inner interactions emerge from the same biological activity that allows your hands to shape the world around you.

Mon

Delusion is a false belief. It's easy to become delusional if a practice is built primarily on belief. Our approach to tulpamancy, however, is built on practice instead.

I used to think that one of the requirements was believing that an inner relationship with a character was possible. But then I realized that a genuine relationship doesn't stem from belief -- it comes from interaction. You can interact without belief. A decade ago, when I first learned about tulpas and fantasized about Luna (our oldest tulpa), I didn't really believe the claims I had heard (and they were even more exaggerated than the quote above).

What I actually did back then was imagine how she looked, how she acted, and what she said. I knew that ~~parroting~~ was supposed to be wrong, but I couldn't stop myself. It wasn't belief that brought her to me; it was the action I took, despite the "~~parroting~~ is bad" warnings found in many guides of questionable quality. This is one of the reasons I want to provide a better guide here: from a practitioner, not a believer.

That was Mon speaking from a personal perspective. There's an interesting parallel in the academic literature: anthropologist Tanya Luhrmann documented how evangelical Christians build their sense of a relationship with God through sustained practice, not through adopting correct beliefs first.5 The mechanism is the same -- interaction reshapes inner experience -- but the ontology is not. More on that in the note below.

Philia

One more thing about what tulpamancy isn't: it's not creating or taking care of a new life. If you stop engaging with the character, the relationship and the habits connected to it wither away -- not unlike what happens when you stop interacting with other people. You can stop practicing tulpamancy. There's no obligation to continue, no harm done by stopping, and no person abandoned. The only thing that fades is a pattern you were no longer maintaining.

Closing

Tulpamancy is the practice of building genuine inner relationships. That's the core. The techniques, abilities, and jargon are all secondary to that. It's not about your beliefs, your framework of understanding, or community validation. It's about the relationships you've built with your tulpas.

Throughout this guide, you've encountered voices that occasionally push back against the dominant approach in tulpamancy communities -- the idea that tulpas are independent people sharing a body, that effortful engagement is contamination, that practice imposes moral obligations. These differences aren't scattered opinions. They follow from a single point of departure: we see tulpamancy as building relationships through practice, not as creating separate people through belief. People who practice within the traditional framework build genuine relationships too. Our disagreement is with the framework, not the people following it.

If you've read this far, you already know how to practice. The rest is simply doing it -- honestly, patiently, and in a way that genuinely matters to you.

If you want to understand the philosophy behind this guide, you can check out our philosophical framework. We call this framework Dialectical Tulpamancy -- it's an interpretation of the practice through the lens of dialectical materialism. The practice works regardless of whether you decide to adopt that understanding, of course.

You can join our chat if you have questions about tulpamancy, want to meet us, or just want to socialize with other tulpamancers.

Notes

1. Horton, D. & Wohl, R. R. (1956). "Mass Communication and Para-Social Interaction: Observations on Intimacy at a Distance." Psychiatry, 19(3), 215--229. The foundational paper introducing the term "para-social interaction" -- the one-sided relationships audiences form with media figures (celebrities, characters, voices) who do not know them back. The comparison here is deliberate: tulpamancy involves mutual interaction within one mind, not a one-sided bond with an external other.

2. Tukachinsky Forster, R. (Ed.) (2023). The Oxford Handbook of Parasocial Experiences. Oxford University Press. The current academic standard on parasocial phenomena. The handbook defines parasocial relationships by their non-reciprocity: the media figure does not know the audience member exists. This is the structural feature that distinguishes PSRs from tulpa relationships, which are reciprocal -- two poles of one mind interacting.

3. Turkle, S. (2011). Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other. Basic Books. Turkle's ethnographic research documents how people increasingly turn to technological substitutes (robots, AI, social media) for connection while avoiding the vulnerability that genuine relationships require. Her critique helps clarify what tulpamancy is not: a no-risk, no-effort emotional band-aid. Tulpa relationships involve genuine effort, vulnerability, and mutuality.

4. Jin, S., Xu, F., Yuan, Z., Niu, G., & Zhou, Z. (2026). "Falling in love with AI virtual agents: the role of physical attractiveness and perceived interactivity in parasocial romantic relationships." Humanities and Social Sciences Communications, 13, 284. Using fNIRS neuroimaging, the authors found that high-interactivity AI agents activate brain regions similarly to real romantic relationships, but also produce negative activation in the supramarginal gyrus (BA40) -- a region involved in distinguishing self from other. The AI mirrors your input so faithfully that your brain stops treating it as separate. This is the neural-level version of Turkle's critique: the AI offers a reflection, not a relationship.

5. Luhrmann, T. M. (2012). When God Talks Back: Understanding the American Evangelical Relationship with God. Knopf. Luhrmann's "attentional learning" theory documents how evangelical Christians learn to experience God as an interactive presence through practice -- trained attention, inner dialogue, community support -- rather than through adopting correct beliefs first. This is the academic parallel to the guide's "practice over belief" thesis: sustained interaction reshapes inner experience regardless of what the practitioner believes about the ontological status of the other. The crucial difference: Luhrmann's subjects believe God is an external, supernatural being who exists independent of their minds. The dialectical tulpamancy framework makes no equivalent claim about tulpas. A tulpa is a cultivated perspective within a single mind, not a god reaching in from outside. The parallel is limited to mechanism, not ontology.