Ashmo

Ashmo's First Tulpa

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I'm one of the original Pokemon kids too, lol. I'm 25 and I still play though >.> It's a way of life.

 

It's incredible though, he's like...a little baby. When I actively force I can nearly feel him. His fur is soft like rabbit fur but a little more coarse. I can't wait for his eyes to open!

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I'm one of the original Pokemon kids too, lol.

 

Same here, we're almost the same age as well. I'm definitely going to play X or Y with Alice when it comes out. The game is simple enough i can focus on her and the game at the same time, even let her pick moves.

 

Congrats on the hatching as well, As for the "green" smell; maybe it's just a fresh scent, like how country air is fresher and cleaner than city air? could be symbolic of his innocence and youth as well. Good work either way!


"The way is in training."

- Miyamoto Musashi

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Same here, we're almost the same age as well. I'm definitely going to play X or Y with Alice when it comes out. The game is simple enough i can focus on her and the game at the same time, even let her pick moves.

 

Congrats on the hatching as well, As for the "green" smell; maybe it's just a fresh scent, like how country air is fresher and cleaner than city air? could be symbolic of his innocence and youth as well. Good work either way!

 

Ommeerrrggeeerrddd I can't wait to get X and Y xD I'm so stoked. I play Soul Silver a lot right now and I just started an adventure playing Fire Red because my girlfriend's brother is letting me borrow and I like to passive force while I play. I'm sure that contributed to his form too.

 

As far as his smell, it's not actually a "fresh" scent. He's actually kinda musty, aside from myrrh having that sweet, lingering scent. I'm hoping it's just a by product from hatching and he kind of airs out, lol.

 

I was thinking about the symbolism and I actually think you're quite right. He changes so much as he matures, I honestly have no idea what his end result will be and I love that. Every single day, he has a new surprise for me it seems.

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Bud's musty, "green" smell has cleared out a little bit. He's starting to smell more like myrrh and peat moss. It's very pleasant. He's starting to move around a bit more too, at least in wonderland. When I actively or passively force him in the real world he's still rather still. Also I'm not exactly sure if I'm puppeting in wonderland or not. I know a little puppeting isn't bad, but I also don't want false results.

 

I kind of feel more like his mom than his creator. It know the difference isn't that far of a stretch, but it feels different to me. Because he more or less looks like an infant were-thing, I treat him like an infant. In wonderland I feed him, mostly bottles of goat milk (I'm a sucker for goat milk myself), but I've also began to infuse it with more personality traits. Some of the guides say to visualize pouring potions with certain qualities into your tulpa while you're forming them, so why not with Bud's little bottles? I've noticed that certain traits, when I think about them, they change the color of the "milk". Not greatly or anything like that, but they give the milk a little tinge of color.

 

I started reading him Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone last night. Only the first chapter. I don't want to do too much of one thing at once. I mean I could read the whole book in one sitting, but I don't think I can focus enough to actively narrate the book to him the whole time. So I'm starting off in short doses until I get more used to it. He seems to like it a lot more than when I was reading him World War Z, lol.

 

My bike's back tire was off it's rim when I first starting forcing, I got it fixed the day before Bud hatched. Since then, when I go for my daily ride (I only bike about 4-6 miles a day until my body gets used to it again) I actively force in wonderland for a few minutes, envision myself getting him ready for the ride and I put him in one of those toddler carrying backpacks that a lot of people have. I try to keep my focus on that can continue to open eye force the entire time I'm biking. Taking him with me every ride. While riding I do a lot of out loud talking to him, since this is really the only time it's really possible. I narrate the surroundings to him and how the ride makes me feel. I've noticed I ride with out hands a lot more often now that I've started forcing while riding. Stretching my hands out and feeling the breeze as it passes through me. I'm trying to send those feelings to him as well. So he knows what it feels like to ride.

 

He still hasn't opened his eyes yet. Nor has he made sounds, but that's not really worrying me. I've been getting a lot more emotional responses from him now that he's hatched. I can't honestly say I consider it true communication yet, but at least I'm learning a basic idea of his likes and dislikes.

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No real "progress" to report on today. Bud still hasn't opened his eyes and all movement and sound are still just me trying to figure out his basic mechanics.

 

Aside from my initial doubt from before, I think I'm experiencing my first real "problem".

 

Concentration.

 

I have no problem with visualizing anything. I can impose almost anything from my mind's eye into my reality and it nearly looks real (only slightly transparent). My problem-no...my challenge is in concentrating and keeping it there.

 

Passive forcing isn't too bad, because I'm allowing myself to multitask with my forcing. I really enjoy passive forcing because I'm making Bud a part of my everyday life.

 

Active forcing though...I seem to have thought that active forcing would be like meditating. Allowing to let your thoughts wash over you, replay past events and learn from them or realize that you are dwelling and to cast them away. Everything just flows from one thought form to the next and you come out feeling cleansed and recharged.

 

Active forcing feels static. I find my mind wandering far too often. I'm never not concentrating on Bud. I just seem to slip from actively forcing him into more of a meditation where I'm passively forcing. I don't think this is fair to him. I should be able to devote more time to active forcing. Where I'm ACTUALLY active forcing.

 

I normally break it up in to 4 to 6 half hour sessions a day. I get too fatigued if I go longer in one sitting. But even the half hour is stretching it. I know it's just going to take time to get used to it and it will all become easier as I gain experience. It just a bit disconcerting.

 

One the plus side, I've been off tobacco for a week and my cravings haven't been too bad. I've been smoking only catnip with the occasional mugwort cigarette in between. It's probably the mugwort curbing my cravings, but I feel really good about it.

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You're fortunate to be so good with imposition. I'm jealous. Is that a natural gift, or have you done this sort of thing before?


"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.'"

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I do a lot of visualization with my craft work and meditation. I've been working on visual techniques since I was about 13 or so. It's just my exercises have never called to hold something in my mind's eye or impose them for such long amounts of time. So this is taking some getting used to.

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Bud's emotional response has been getting stronger. I think I'm even experiencing "head pressure" at times. Mostly when I read to him. I'm trying to only read one chapter of Harry Potter a day but yesterday when I started closing the book up, telling him that was it for I felt a sharp, near searing pain on the right side up from front lobe. Just above my temple. It was gone in a second. I was kind of like, "Alright, one more-but only one!"

 

He really seems to like my reading to him. Close or as much as when I actively force him. He also really cares for my girlfriend, Bree. He feels very protective over her and when I passive force while spending time with her too, all I feel is this immense wash of love and loyalty. He really enjoys me bringing him around while I'm spending time with Bree. I think it feels like a family setting to him. I know it's starting to feel that way for me as well.

 

There has been more deviation in his looks. His tail is growing. It's longer than before and where his tuft was his tail, it's now at the end. Almost like a sort of red furred lion's tail? Honestly, watching all of his physical deviation is nice. I'm really enjoying seeing him become what he's meant to be. He also has strange little nubs coming in on his upper back. Right in between his backbone and shoulder blades. I felt them the other day and didn't think anything of it, but now he's losing his hair there. His blonde mane is coming in more and longer blonde hairs are sprouting down his backbone, stopping at his tail. He's also more than twice the size he was when he first hatched. About the size of the average two year old child. He's becoming a truly gorgeous creature. Simply beautiful. I wish I had better drawing skills so I could show everyone.

 

His eyes still haven't open yet though. I have noticed an excess amount of closed eye blinking. I think it will be soon. Not that I mind, he can take all the time he needs.

 

I've had a bit of a late start today and didn't get my morning bike ride in. I feel kind of drained so I'm not sure if I will feel up to my evening ride either, but since today is one of Bree's late work days, I plan on spending more time active forcing today. Maybe reading 2 or 3 chapters of HP instead of just the 1.

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That's neat that he's communicating so well in emotion and sensation. Have you heard any sounds from him?

 

I'm interesting in seeing what those nubs are.


"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.'"

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That's neat that he's communicating so well in emotion and sensation. Have you heard any sounds from him?

 

I'm interesting in seeing what those nubs are.

 

I haven't heard any sounds yet. I've noticed he makes faces when he doesn't like certain things though. This I'm certain I'm not puppeting.

 

When I first started forcing with him I used to listen to a lot of classical music. I'm a sucker for Chopin and Mozart. But now he will barely let me listen to it while I force. I just get this, incredibly exasperated feeling of impatience, lol.

 

I've also notice he is rather impatient in other things. Like when he wants me to read to him. When we're both waiting for Bree to get home from work because he likes spending time with us both. He's so incredibly impatient when he doesn't get his way! I feel like I had no way of foreseeing this and at the same time I should have almost expected it because I have never actually actively focused on the trait for him. I myself have been told how much of a patient and I think I simply...expected that part of my personality to rub off on him naturally?

 

I'm excited about the nubbies now, but last night when I really looked him over they worried me. I mean, I know they won't end up being anything bad, they just kind of shocked me! You know?

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