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And with such passion as to chronicle one little mirror of myself in Vast

Am I truly wrong for wanting to keep her form like that?  

49 members have voted

  1. 1. Am I truly wrong for wanting to keep her form like that?

    • No, you're fine.
      33
    • No, but...I hope it's censored.
      6
    • Yes, but...I suppose desires can't be helped.
      7
    • Yes, it's wrong.
      3


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What is this, a document for ants? >.> If you're going to link to an offsite text dump, I'd suggest using Pastebin as that's all plain text and looks pretty much the same for everyone.

 

As for the mature content, we don't usually moderate progress reports unless it's specifically requested by the author. Take a look at mine, I have some pretty sexual stuff on there and none of the other mods complain about it.


"Science isn't about why, science is about why not?" -Cave Johnson

Tulpae: Luna, Elise, Naomi

My progress report

 

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...Huh. Alright, then I guess I'll post it here.

 

 


For the backstory, there’s a bit of a backtrack for that. It all started when I had Ves ‘fight’ my inner frustration and tendencies gravitating towards sex and the like. In the beginning, her terms were that she would do it, but that I had to agree to rid myself of all pornographic materials and so on. I would clear out everything, stop seeding whatever I had left, clean up the hidden folders, and shine it all up until my computer was pretty much synonymous with a simple gaming laptop. I did this.

 

However, I….I am a boy with desires. I deleted what I had, but I still search up pictures and videos. I don’t save them, as stated in the agreement, but I still look them up. Ves was kind enough to allow me to continue, but did get a little irked whenever I went off on a session. She proceeded to bark at me for a few moments, then decided she would get this fabulous idea:

 

I would dress her, considering that she’d just a girl with metal arms and slippers on, a large tuft of fur at her crotch.

 

I was taken aback quite a bit, but I decided if she was set on it, I wouldn’t deny her. It wasn’t something I wasn’t used to doing already, and I figured this would be an excellent tie in to remind me of what she did to free me from the chains I kept throwing on myself with every successive view of gratuitous breast and ass.

 

Thus began the search! I went for conservative clothing at first, at least in mind. I hadn’t gotten through even thinking up one outfit before

 

Hey, no. I want the things they got all dressed up in.

“B-but….I can’t dress you in lingerie. That’s wrong, and pretty much a violation of the agreement.”

How?

“I said I would never save an image again. You wearing something is like the ultimate permanent save.”

No, I said image. Digital image and such. You can’t touch me, you can’t hold me, you can’t do me. You don’t have to worry. Besides, pants and sleeves would hinder me. I would ask for a body suit, but I’m no Samus.

“Vessssss…..no. Come on, be reasonable. I am not going to have you fighting monsters for me, dressed in some skimpy teddy or garter belt. You’re better than that.”

I

want

lingerie

 

Now, you can either pick it, or I can just cycle through until I find something from whatever you just looked at.

 

Most of the women in the pictures before were nude. I thought it would all be okay, but then a picture of an advertisement for bondage suits popped into my head, completely out of my control. That’s pretty weird, right? You don’t like bondage, right?

 

PICK.

Pick. Easy for the model to say.

 

I went over to some lingerie sites and surfed around until I found this little violet number and some leggings to fit.

 

20 minutes in; You’re enjoying this, aren’t you? I know you are~

I was. It felt pretty exhilarating to try and coordinate an outfit for a fighter from skimpy clothing. I felt like the character costume designers for Soulcalibur, and I wasn’t about to give up.

 

I found a thong that was all too perfect and a nice shawl to go over the shoulders, in case it gets chilly. I was almost possessed to finish this up, when she spoke again.

 

You are such a pervert, you know that? *laughing*

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were against clothing now. Should I stop?”

No, no! You’re doing such a fantastic job, you know!

 

I finally finished off with a good note, with a nice peacock flavored hairclip and leaving it at that.

As of now, she stood before me, decked in lingerie that was stitched together into one outfit, which I had no idea how she would remove. She then promptly stepped out of it, twirled, and stepped back in to show me just how it was done. As I looked on, I noticed fabrics shift and rustle, colors shifting here and there- it was pretty enchanting until she finished, and I noticed her petalscales along her arms had this V going down them, like a good sliver was taken out. She then flared them, and they flashed; something had happened. Her shawl was torn and went to the shoulders in tatters, the breast section of the teddy/apron torn away to reveal pasties emblazoned with little crimson stars. Her thong had turned into something crotchless, and a few curls of hair marked one momentous occurrence for me: Vespera had formed genitalia. The hair curled like wet fur, and the outside became a little more form fitting and trimmed, the hair going from coarse fur to what seemed to be fur not unlike the belly of a cat.

 

Ves filled out a little, and then smirked. I don’t know why yet.

I do admit, I intended for her to be sexual because I wanted her to embody my sins, once again. Instead, she became the thing that slays them, but...is this really how it has to be?

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Guest Riy

Dat thong tho...

-anyways-

 

Red, as long as you present your ideas and experiences in a mature and adult manner you can rest assured no ones going to grab torches and pitchforks over a sexual post of this nature. Besides, it's your PR. We're all just visitors!

 

This does bring up a few points though.

 

Pornography is something males are bombarded with almost 24/7. If women are taught to meet the standards of beauty then men are taught to meet the standards of sexual 'wantability'. When I was younger (say ~18) I would hide my porn in 3 times imbedded files, put that inside a hidden file, and stash it away in some deep program file that no one would ever go to.

 

Now I have a folder on my desktop marked 'Porn' and it's more organized than my filing cabinet beneath my desk. You can see how the attitude can change. If you're comfortable with Ves being the, ah, 'focal point' for your desires, then run with it. She sounds like she knows what she wants (and may I venture to say what you want as well?) and maybe even have a bit of domin-x thrown in there to spice it up.

 

Besides, this seemed to be a pretty fun experience for the both of you and it's obvious you two can banter back and forth in good faith. Just keep having fun with it man, the whole idea is to enjoy your time spent with them. No matter what the context.

 

Cheers mate!

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Now I have a folder on my desktop marked 'Porn' and it's more organized than my filing cabinet beneath my desk. You can see how the attitude can change. If you're comfortable with Ves being the, ah, 'focal point' for your desires, then run with it.
Oh, I know what you mean. Years ago I would have had it in a program folder for an outdated tax software, 4 files deep so my dead man switch was that my computer tried to update it about every week and renew the files. Before I deleted it, I ended up having a folder in my downloads reaching 194gb of things I had never seen, but torrented just in case. A completely open folder dead center of my downloads, at the top of the list filtered by folder size. Juuuuust in case.

 

Thanks to you, Procron, and glitch, I'm actually becoming a bit more open with it. I haven't looked up any more lingerie, but she does just walk around doing nothing while dressed like the queenie and host of a brothel. I've tried giving her something else to fight, but methinks the clothing made her lazy. There are a few rips in the leggings, though, so maybe she's just going off to be a queen of the night while I sleep.

 

Also, she really likes jazz. In the beginning, I would listen to hop and the hip just to force her, because I wanted it a separate situation from my normal life and tastes, but she ended up loving jazz and alternative forms; forcing is way easier to people like

, like
. She's becoming more worldly to me. In the beginning, I forged a witch- she turned to a knight. After, I forged a fighter- she changed classes to a mage. She's got the arms, she's not changed, but her skills I've yet to see.

 

I have been moving away from the RPG themes, and I apologize for that, because that was the highlight of these journals for her and I- to showcase the raw pain and pleasure of rose gold arms as a weapon, and to give the readers an Idea of just what I mean when I say she fights for me. The true purpose, however, was for me to record everything she did in a form that would be easy enough for me to grasp on a whim, should I ever get too busy and end up ignoring the girl I had worked so hard to make. I wanted to leave something that I could read and she could commentate on.

 

Now, I suppose a revival of those ideals have come about again. I've given my wonderland a name; Cadáver de coloso. It started out Arabian, but some Spanish things leaked in, me being half mexican, and all. Skulls are everywhere now. Death is a constant thought, but...it's not as destructive as you'd expect. Ves is just the reaper. The entire island looks a bit like the corpse of a colossus floating belly up in the water, chained to the sands by links and a sword. The sands below we have yet to explore...and someday I want to get to those radio towers. Maybe it's time I cut the chain and took the island with me as I go. I'm going to make a sigil, as a way to chain her to every day. Then I can do better than now.

 

Also! I tried forging French. That is...both a failure and a success. Every now and then, she's got a normal American accent, every now and then, French. I've been listening to all sorts of French (Read- Podcasts of books read in french) and It started to leak into me, but I just can't seem to get it together. I think I still need to work on forming her completely first, before I step up my game. I'm going to get it at some point.

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I've given my wonderland a name; Cadáver de coloso.

I don't pretend to know foreign languages, but does that mean "Corpse of the colossus?"

 

Skulls are everywhere now. Death is a constant thought' date=' but...it's not as destructive as you'd expect. Ves is just the reaper. The entire island looks a bit like the corpse of a colossus floating belly up in the water, chained to the sands by links and a sword. The sands below we have yet to explore...and someday I want to get to those radio towers. [/quote']

That sounds...lovely.

 

Seriously though, don't be afraid to explore your wonderland, especially since you have a fierce warrior-mage tulpa. We are both curious as to what you'll find.

 

I have been moving away from the RPG themes' date=' and I apologize for that[/quote']

It's your PR. Do whatever you want. Certainly, I'll follow it no matter what changes you decide to implement.

 

Keep going! We enjoy reading about your progress.


Niteo and Amber Take On the World

 

Amber speaks in italics right now.

 

Talk to Niteo on here or on discord

 

We share the body, we share a life. I'm not an accessory to his life...

 

 

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My girls tend to dress slightly more conservatively than that when we're out in public, in order to avoid awkward erections and the like, but whenever I'm at home Luna likes to lounge around in her pajamas (which don't leave a whole lot to the imagination).

 

And as for the thing Ves said about you not being able to interact with her in a physical kind of way, I'd say that's not entirely true. Having sex with your tulpa is quite possible, I should know. ;)


"Science isn't about why, science is about why not?" -Cave Johnson

Tulpae: Luna, Elise, Naomi

My progress report

 

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And as for the thing Ves said about you not being able to interact with her in a physical kind of way, I'd say that's not entirely true. Having sex with your tulpa is quite possible, I should know. Wink
Kekeke! Ves and I are at an understanding that I don't want sex from her. Moreover, I don't get awkward erections anymore. Becoming a connoisseur of flesh and exceedingly raunchy behavior leaves you...wanting in that department. I do get a fire in my heart, but nothing really comes of it.

 

We are both curious as to what you'll find.
Shit, you too? Since I've been on an imposition kick, I've been putting her into reality. I need to visit Losco Loso again and see what I missed; there are doors with emblems we haven't been in, walls begging to be torn down with her strength. I'm starting to believe I'm a little too impressionable, because I decided to watch Johnathan Joestar's Bizarro Adventura, and now all I can imagine is her rapid fire punching with an intensity I've never seen before.

 

 

I don't pretend to know foreign languages, but does that mean "Corpse of the colossus?"

Yes. You get a gold star!

 

Yeah, it's a corpse. I've taken to calling it Losco Loso. Los-Coloso.

I'm a funny bastardo.

 

The same things apply as before, with the architecture and the bi bim bap, but the sands are just teeming seas of gold and crimson, and I can't wait to see them. I've even interested in this sword tying down the island as a whole, like Sanctaphrax. Except more dead colossus shapey. Maybe it's something else she can use to get a new form on!

 

 

 

SPEAKING OF WHICH!

I have finally nailed down what caused the whole sexuality issue. It's the slippers. Yep...this is in no way my fault at all. ENTIRELY the fault of the slippers that were made from the corpse of my sexual frustrations. I can in no way incur blame for this. So...yeah.

The slippers she got do give her some amazing speed and skill, but it's leaked into her. I found a wonderful way to work with this, taking cues from Proctor himself- I took the slippers off and held them for a minute.

Or rather, I just took them off and wondered. The lingerie kinda fell off in ribbons and then there was just Vespera, flippant as ever. I had her put them back on, and then the clothes just sort of popped on. This gave me a genius idea.

 

Ves has to kill off the parts of me I don't like. She gets prizes for this.

The prizes and the slaying don't mark me being rid of them. They just prove that she earned the right to nag me to stop whenever I'm about to do it again.

If I use her prizes, more entertainment for killing other bosses. I do need a way to categorize them, however.

So I made a user interface, not unlike

. Instead of one axis, however, it rotates on two. One slot holds the slippers and lingerie outfit, and whatever prize she'll earn from killing off the new boss, a sloth that can hold off time and use it to revive/attack/position himself into better strategic locations. I don't know the prize yet.

The other axis contains slots for Demons, which is just her fancy way of using the outfits she gets. If she puts on Sleipnir's Outfit, denoted by a lowercase S, for example; Sexy outfit and slightly salacious Vespera. However, even within the outfit, there are alterations from different djinn I happen to catch onto. I use bare Vespera with her normal fighting style of finger blades and acrobatics, nVn. I use Sleipnir and a normal style, sVn. I use a soul from a djinn (Any of my redeeming qualities) and she gets sort of an inner boost to change the tides of war, if faced with insurmountable odds.

 

It's less like equipment, and more like

They are consumable, though, so they can run out, but...the longer they stay on, the stronger they get. The problem is that keeping them on requires focus, and getting hit has a chance of knocking her out of it that rises the longer she stays in it.

So far, I've got nothing on redeeming qualities. However, I've often been told that I'm really damn good at working with trash and making broken things into art or better, and that it shows a level of passion that I should put into everything else in my life. I don't know bout all that, but...the fire to go on, the drive and creativity I've been putting into this; I think I can safely say that's one. I've got no idea what to name it, though, and as every good tulpamancer knows, names are power.

 

Anybodygoddaclue?

 

 

As such, I decided Vespera's ultimate goal- She will kill off all the sins I hold, free all the secrets I keep, and find all the shining parts of me. When she can get her final outfit together, and she can gather the pieces of the best quality of me, then I'll gift her the last name I can- Vesperasura.

Until then, she'll be sticking with the name I gave her tonight, after realizing she was the best piece of work I'd ever made and will continue to work on- Vesperarc Enciel.

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Intredasting. I augmented Luna and Saria several years ago, now their bodies are pumping out nanomachines and they can lift heavy weapons and treat them like paper. They also both have a sort of enhanced AR/heads-up display/servitor that I created and subsequently imposed on my vision as well. I call it Enigma, and I designed it to synthesize various types of information from the environment and from my mind/body and use it in different features (i.e. motion radar, energy and glucose/glycogen levels, day planner, and more). I also fell off of my bike this summer and cut my chin open, ended up having to go to the hospital and get 8 stitches. Saria told me later the reason that I wasn't hurt worse than that is because she added a system she calls Automatic Damage Reduction (or ADR for short) that automatically mitigates any impending bodily harm I'm about to experience (like, say, faceplanting into the pavement).

 

Enigma has proven surprisingly modular in this build (which I consider to be the third and by far the most successful) and I think you could potentially benefit from a HUD servitor, given your apparent proclivity for skateboarding accidents. You should check out my servitor workshop thread sometime if you get bored, it can be found in the Guides section.

 

Never mind, apparently the Guides section doesn't exist anymore. I didn't back my servitor workshop thingy up anywhere either. >_> Oh well, maybe I'll just post some of this stuff to my PR.


"Science isn't about why, science is about why not?" -Cave Johnson

Tulpae: Luna, Elise, Naomi

My progress report

 

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I just have a few things to add.

 

I don't know bout all that, but...the fire to go on, the drive and creativity I've been putting into this; I think I can safely say that's one. I've got no idea what to name it, though, and as every good tulpamancer knows, names are power.

 

I myself lack eloquence with words. However, I think you found the right term and didn't even know it.

 

it shows a level of passion

 

Is "passion" the word you're looking for?

 

The slippers she got do give her some amazing speed and skill, but it's leaked into her. I found a wonderful way to work with this, taking cues from Proctor himself- I took the slippers off and held them for a minute.

Or rather, I just took them off and wondered. The lingerie kinda fell off in ribbons and then there was just Vespera, flippant as ever. I had her put them back on, and then the clothes just sort of popped on. This gave me a genius idea.

 

Don't you even give me credit for that. You forget that you gave me that idea. Don't you remember?

 

As such' date=' I decided Vespera's ultimate goal- She will kill off all the sins I hold, free all the secrets I keep, and find all the shining parts of me. [/quote']

 

And a damn fine goal at that. I should take more hints from you.


Niteo and Amber Take On the World

 

Amber speaks in italics right now.

 

Talk to Niteo on here or on discord

 

We share the body, we share a life. I'm not an accessory to his life...

 

 

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I just have a few things to add.

 

 

I myself lack eloquence with words. However, I think you found the right term and didn't even know it.

 

 

Is "passion" the word you're looking for?

 

 

Don't you even give me credit for that. You forget that you gave me that idea. Don't you remember?

 

 

And a damn fine goal at that. I should take more hints from you.

 

1. No. I tend to give names, something that correlates in more ways than one. If I just used passion...I don't think I'd be happy. Things like Ifrit, Belial, Mars- Names that are the fire of the world.

 

2. I gave you a suggestion. You had the heart and cunning to apply it in a way that didn't hurt Caeden, was fairly peaceful, and didn't tear up any bonds in the process. I know it's the norm to be careful and keep things at a good pace, but you still handled yourself well even considering your confusion and my vague directions.

 

3. I'm surprised she wants to do it. I think it's just the monster designs that she's after.

 

Intredasting. I augmented Luna and Saria several years ago, now their bodies are pumping out nanomachines and they can lift heavy weapons and treat them like paper. They also both have a sort of enhanced AR/heads-up display/servitor that I created and subsequently imposed on my vision as well. I call it Enigma, and I designed it to synthesize various types of information from the environment and from my mind/body and use it in different features (i.e. motion radar, energy and glucose/glycogen levels, day planner, and more). I also fell off of my bike this summer and cut my chin open, ended up having to go to the hospital and get 8 stitches. Saria told me later the reason that I wasn't hurt worse than that is because she added a system she calls Automatic Damage Reduction (or ADR for short) that automatically mitigates any impending bodily harm I'm about to experience (like, say, faceplanting into the pavement).
Woo! Augmentation!

She doesn't cover me physically, yet. I'm keeping this all in my head until I've got imposition down.

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