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Sock's Daydream Diary


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[align=center]Morning Tulpa session tunes:

 

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Just did a small, 20 minute morning session of meditation/forcing with Midori. I had very few intrusive thoughts during this one, and none of them strong enough to make me have to jump out early, and I'll be doing a bunch of narrating to her as I walk to the bus stop to an interview today. I'm going to do a longer session with her later on today, and I'll hopefully have some meatier news by that time, as well.

 

I think I'm finally getting into a groove with my post-personality tulpa sessions, making it a bit more organized so I don't just spend the entire session just looking at Midori blankly, or her just hugging/glomping/sexually harassing me, with your's truly just reacting with "Oh my! All this affection is making me so bashful! Tee hee~". Visuals, naturally, come first, and this usually happens in the void. I'll just have her appear, outlined in light to make her a bit easier to see, and reinforce some physical traits that I sometimes forget (like the fact that she has pointy ears). I've also been doing some more detailing on the hands, as they're currently just there due to assumptions rather than me actually focusing on them. The Polka dot dress seems to be her new default, though I'm not completely sure if it's because she herself likes it, or because I like it and I'm starting to just imagine it without really thinking about it. I also gave her a big straw hat today, because girls in big straw hats are adorable to me.

 

I didn't wish to neglect my garden completely, and I think doing some exploring is a nice way to bond a bit with my tulpa anyway, so we stepped out of the void room for a while, and she beckoned me to follow her past out of the garden, past the woods and valley where the large abandoned mansion was, and into another patch of woods. She showed me another rather rickety looking house, deep within the woods. I'm already noticing that after the first house that appeared in my wonderland, the rest of them had a very rustic, old, and run down look to them. Why is this? I'm guessing this is her reaction to me liking the look of old, warn out, abandoned places. I often visited sites with log about people visiting them, my desktop has them as a backdrop, I've narrated to her about how beautiful I think they are, and that I'd love to go explore one of them one day, etc. I guess it'd be pretty difficult not to pick on that, ha ha~!

 

After that we headed back to the void for more one-on-one, starting with some testing with the King's Prism. She smacked me after a bit, quickly confirming that I was not parroting and allowing me to discard much of my doubt. She's mainly been responding to my questions during forcing sessions with head nods and bodily gestures, which I stated above not to have spent much time on, so I wanted to be absolutely sure it wasn't just me rocking her around on accident. I went on to do some Voxxing with her, since I hadn't been doing that for a while. Nothing too extensive, just some reciting of the alphabet, basic greeting phrases, moving her lips to match mine, etc. I don't worry too much about hearing things, since I already know that her voice is unmistakable, since I can sorta hear it even though it's in my head. I then finished off with some narrating to her about what we were going to be doing today, as well as a high five.

 

You know, because she's cool like that!

Sock Cottonwell's

Sketchbook, Journal, and Ask thread.

Peace

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Go into tulpa creation purely for curiosity's sake. Much of the interest comes from the memory recall and the novelty of possibly seeing one of my characters projected in real space' date=' assuming it's not just a troll.[/size']

 

Oh goodness why is she so cute I love her so much all these new feelings hhhNNNNNNG!

 

Go into tulpa creation with pure and clean thoughts. Have a belief that adding sex to this experiment would make things wierd and awkward' date=' and making a thinking being just to have it give me mental orgasms whenever I want would be morally reprehensible. Make this clear to said tulpa, and often reinforce that I want her to be my friend rather than lover.[/size']

 

Tulpa tries to be as physically intimate as a thought form can possibly be' date=' often greeting me with tackles hugs and kisses. Is openly affectionate to an extreme degree, and may wish to engage in sexual intercourse.[/size']

 

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Be right back, forcing.[/align]

Sock Cottonwell's

Sketchbook, Journal, and Ask thread.

Peace

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Told you, it just happens. It's like tumbling down a slippery slope, and once you reach the bottom there's a nice comfy spot waiting for you. I never intended to have intercourse with Clair when she was made, and the mere thought disgusted me. Now look.

Orange juice helps with concentration headaches.

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Told you, it just happens. It's like tumbling down a slippery slope, and once you reach the bottom there's a nice comfy spot waiting for you. I never intended to have intercourse with Clair when she was made, and the mere thought disgusted me. Now look.

 

The fact that there's been multiple threads on this very forum that planted the idea in my head, as well as a post on a /jp/ tulpa thread I found in the archive, describing how mental-only orgasm works and that people on there have tried it...helps very very little as well. I still haven't been able to force because I needed to clear my head of all this filth. To think that I stopped watching porn/fapping because I didn't want Midori to see stuff like that weeks ago...

 

I'd rather not give in to the horny dog in the back of my head, so I'm going to be holding out as much as I can. Even if I do give in, I'm not going to be posting about it here. Nothing murders credibility and interest to normal folk than some guy talking about how he bumped uglies with his mental construct.

Sock Cottonwell's

Sketchbook, Journal, and Ask thread.

Peace

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Agreed. I wasn't going to tell anyone about me and Clair but it just sort of got out in IRC >_>

 

And yeah, try to hold out if it really bothers you. That's what I did. I pushed all of those thoughts and feelings away; it didn't seem to cause any harm.

Orange juice helps with concentration headaches.

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Really, I think the people talking about it on here is what's bothering me more than anything. Yeah, Midori's very touchy and likes to show her affection through action, but I rarely gave the idea that she'd want to do it until read about it and how it would work. Midori's still very much a good buddy rather than a waifu or anything of that sort, and I usually looked at her displays as platonic rather than directly sexual/romantic. Granted, there were some examples that pushed this a little, but she never went too far with it.

 

It is my mind, after all, thinking about sex all the time would probably do more to sway her to that idea, rather than anything she's done so far.

Sock Cottonwell's

Sketchbook, Journal, and Ask thread.

Peace

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Like it matters, all you sex monkeys can think about is sex. Literally. I bet you want to fuck this text so bad. You're so pathetic. Just do it. Get it over with. It's obviously inevitable.

Scarlet - anime, 8/15/2012

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