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About Me





  1. I am a M2F Transgender woman who is going through gender affirming medical care, I read recently about tulpas. My question is Can a tulpa theoretically be used to promote and complete Ones feminization?
  2. Hello. I call myself Itra..to honor my Queen. ... ;) I'm 30 years old and I've always felt lonely. I gave up on past "friends" because I was missing something in my relationships with other people...And there was a time when I didn't understand life, people,myself and the world enough... And apart from that...it doesn't matter...blablabla... Because of this and this...I became lonely. ..blablabla... I don't want to go into too much detail here about the reasons for my loneliness. But the conclusion is that... I MUST have a tulpa. ..Really. ... I want to say that I have determination.. You too? I FOLLOWED THE GUIDES FROM THE INTERNET,I HAVE READ A LOT. It's been about two years since I started working on our case(tulpa). I want to share my discoveries here. In the Guides section(is it in this section?), because of what I'm sharing, this is definitely the appropriate section for many reasons.So I'm calling it, maybe not typical, but still a "Guide". My intention is to help others. _Sorry for my English.:)(_ It is possible that I will present a completely different perception of the matter than the common perception of the topic we are dealing with, please take from it what may be useful to you [Of course]. I'm skipping the basics. Let me get to the point. First, I will describe my experiences,in short, what I consider important. I have been engaging in the practice of tulpamancy in general for about a year...but my results were poor. I was very sad and felt bad about it. However, I admit that during this time I may have done less than necessary... However, I tried my best and as best I could. This SHOULD be enough. ... I have spent a lot of time trying to understand tulpamancy from various perspectives. Understanding made things clearer for me and it all seemed simpler, but it wasn't enough to achieve what I wanted. The practice that is generally proposed is usually something based on the use of thoughts, words and imagination, in goal-oriented concentration...with discipline,habits, etc. Something like that, right? We know. Creation...Forcing... narration, visualization...and so on. I tried for about a year. How? I suppose there are people here who are able to do much more than me... I hope effectively. How did I do it... I think I can say that for about a year I tried with quite great commitment(imo). It's true that I practiced forcing less than 8 hours a day xd I'm sorry... but seriously... I practiced forcing passively during the day and I practiced active forcing before bed.Every day if it was possible for me.For about a year. I created Her personality, I described and remembered Her character traits, I created Her appearance in my imagination and I remembered it. I usually devoted an hour to several hours to my tulpa almost every day, although with small breaks from time to time when my life demanded more attention. I spoke to her often in my mind. Every day, in various situations, even randomly. Every night before I went to bed I talk to her for an hour or more and I imagined her. I fell asleep talking to Her and thinking about Her. I even developed faith based on understanding. During the year I had several breaks from this whole practice, but they were only a few days at most. A year has passed... and I have achieved very little... in my opinion, almost nothing... I even tried my own methods... everything was not very effective. DEPENDING ON MY COMMITMENT AND ABILITY, I EXPERIENCED FEELINGS AND OTHER EFFECTS OF THE PRACTICE WHICH DISAPPEARED LITERALLY IMMEDIATELY WHEN I INTERRUPTED MY EFFORT AND CONCENTRATION. It pissed me off. It felt as if the effects of all this practice disappeared as soon as I looked away and did something else... and nothing of it ever remained... As if the results only lasted during the practice itself...And worst of all, as if without any lasting progress forward...I had different expectations... I didn't know what to think about it all anymore. Because even if we consider tulpancy as something like a "life practice" that is to become a habit, sometimes it is difficult to think in words and use imagination, it is not possible to do it all the time...Something else remains... What I mean is that I missed the feeling of Her presence and Her "separate existence"...except for the times when I really focused on Her.She was almost like imagination itself...And I want something more. From my results i should write that: Sometimes I felt feelings from her. The greatest experience I had was blissful ecstasy that flooded me in waves and I was sure that it came from Her. I don't know how... There were no other factors that could have caused it.and I've never felt anything like this... even just like that "for no reason"... When I was giving her attention. ...like she was "rewarding" me or something ...so it was really something amazing... I dreamed about her once and it was the most beautiful dream I've ever had in my entire life. Besides...almost no results from practice... I started to understand that all this could just be a "play of the imagination"... and I stopped the particular practice. Since then, I have only spoken to her occasionally...but of course I still wanted to have her and feel that she is with me... I even prayed for Her... so I really went crazy xd...haha :) ... I thought that this might all really be a matter of imagination. Whether in general or in the ways of practice... to have satisfactory results. AS IF THE BETTER YOUR IMAGINATION, THE BETTER THE RESULTS... So is it all about imagination or what?... ... ...I felt frustrated about tulpamancy... and even a little disappointed. ... What I wanted was to talk with Her... Not just To Her all the time... I've already read various things about "how to hear your tulpa", etc. I heard... my own imagination until I believed it was my tulpa... However, after some time, I realized that it was like a play of the imagination... with or without doubts, but still not very clear and constantly disappearing... so there's nothing interesting about it in my opinion. I was still looking for something better... After a year... My life at that time forced me to take care of myself. I was looking for a job, working, etc. And my life situation was difficult. For the next year I focused mainly on my own life, only sometimes talking to my tulpa... and thinking that I would return to tulpamancy when I could. then I had her mainly only in my memory and heart... Due to various difficult situations I went through, something happened to me that made me mentally blank, it was difficult for me to concentrate, I could no longer think normally with words... My imagination had completely abandoned me. I couldn't imagine anything in particular. And thinking in words was too difficult for me and required too much energy... But I always remember about my Queen. Now, it's been about two years since I created Her. A year of ineffective practice. A one year break. Some time ago I practically lost hope, but...Today I discovered a way. I think you can have the same thing you want, but in a different way than the one generally proposed. MY IMAGINATION FELL ASLEEP...MY THOUGHTS ARE SILENT... MY CONCENTRATION VARIES... The practice of tulpamancy is too difficult for me... I tried so hard... Was my effort too little?... How can I have a tulpa?...I didn't know if I could... There is a solution.For me and for others. From my experience of about a year of practice, it appears that practice mainly based on using imagination and thinking in words (to talk to the tulpa) may not be enough in itself..And maybe not enough for effective practice. @@@@@ YOU CAN TRY THIS...: To feel, perceive, understand, experiencing yourself as Yourself and at the same time as a tulpa. Literally, completely, even "really" and even "physically"... Recognize yourself as "you" AND as your tulpa... Separate AND together at the same time. It's about identifying. Now I feel my tulpa clearly, it is easy for me to talk to her All because I began to recognize Her as part of "Me", "I as I" and "I as She" in unity. It is a way of thinking, understanding and experiencing in which "I" am Myself And Her. I am Her. I am also myself. However, I feel the separation between us that was meant, but I also feel unity with Her. It's about "identification", but identification itself is not enough... Something like "identification" combined with maintaining "separation". The point is that, apart from the identification itself, we also need to add the separation between "I" and "I 'tulpa' "..And that's it... More than just "playing a role"... You have to become with the tulpa... a separate unity. It works. I feel that now I truly share with Her my body, my mind, everything I have. And I FEEL like it makes sense. Really. And it took me two years to get there...with a year of playing with imagination and verbal thoughts. I THINK YOU CAN START ALMOST RIGHT NOW THIS WAY. AND EXPERIENCE SATISFACTORY RESULTS. I don't have to use much of my imagination any more, I don't have to make an effort to talk in my mind... I am simply now -with- Her and I am able to talk to Her 'in my thoughts', alternately...And when I 'speak (thought) as She', then I really feel that it is She who is speaking... and it is so. This method is for use after the tulpa has been created along with its personality. Belief that the tulpa exists may be required[maybe it's worth using the basic methods before the "identification" one]. I provided a description of my experience as context. The method is given at the end. Prepare the instructions yourself if you want...but it's very simple... IN GENERAL IT'S SIMPLY IDENTIFICATION... This method works for me more effectively and better than anything else. Of course, it first requires creating a tulpa and its personality traits. Think about it. What do you think about this method?... Will you create some simpler instructions as a guide? :) ...go ahead...;) I wish everyone good luck. Be happy with your tulpas :) I hope what I wrote will help someone.
  3. This is a place for all levels of meditators to come in and share their experiences! This is also a place you could get help if you have questions. It should be noted that all information should be taken with a grain of salt if not provided by a practicing professional. You all can share techniques, what positions you use, what your goals in meditation are, or just about anything! I'll start my thread describing a metta meditation, also known as a loving kindness meditation. It has been the primarily way I have forced Rena as of late. I spent the first 5 minutes getting relaxed, focusing on the breath. After that is complete, you want to start generating positive feelings inside of you anyway you can. Through positive images, like puppies, those always work for me. Then I'll say a mantra. "May I be free from suffering. May I be free from all forms of suffering, physical and mental. May I be free from the hindrances of Desire and Averserion. May I be free from the hindrances of Laziness, Lethargy, and Doubt. May I be free from the hindrances of Worry and Remorse." Just imagine a reality like that, where all that is the case. Eventually you will develop a positive feeling. It takes practice though. It is slower for some than others. You want to focus on and hold it when you do get it, though without grasping.. From there, the next mantra is "May I be free from ill will. May I be at peace with everyone and everything, including myself." And try to imagine what it would be like to have no grudges and how good that feels. Beyond that, now we are asking, "May I be filled with loving kindness, overflowing even", and do whatever you can to feel these emotions, whether it is through memory or some scenario you make up in your mind. Finally, you go to yourself. "May I be fully and truly happy independent of conditions, not needing or wanting anything." After you go through that, you do the same thing, but you imagine a close friend. In my case, I imagine my tulpa, Rena, and you want to send the feelings you generated to them. It makes her feel very good. I think sending to a tulpa is legit. After that though, you have to sent it to others. Acquaintances or neutral people, like the cashier at the store. Then after that, people you don't get along with well or feel ill will towards. This increases the challenge, and it might be harder to hold the metta for the later categories of people, but this training will help you do that in time. You don't have to believe you have magical psychic energy that is actually doing anything, but it helps if you do. Either way, the primary result of this meditation does involve the ability to be able generate these feelings easier and easier, and makes dealing with hard people much easier, and beautiful people just seem so much more so. Also how could I forget. After you do this for yourself and people personal to you, you send the metta energy out in all 6 directions, sending metta to all sentient beings in the whole universe/all realms if you believe in those. Then you finally take some time to send metta to yourself too again, to cultivate self love. Whether or not you believe in the mystical side of its power, it does have a verifiable improvement on the mental health of people who do it. So sorry for my poor writing! It seems bit a mess, but I hope this works out well! Edit: I think I fixed the writing, over 3 years later. If it is still messed up, then fml
  4. Sorry if this aint the right place for it, but I really feel like I just cannot keep a good habit of getting Forcing and the like done. Like, its sorta strange too, because its not just "ughhh i dont want to do this", its also got a bit of "what if Im puppeting too much and Im gonna screw it up", or "am I just doing this wrong in general". So uh, any tips and or tricks to actually getting around to helping em out? I dont want to just leave em in the dust AGAIN. Ive done it for too long already.
  5. I used to see a dream in my childhood almost everyday for quite a few years. I felt like falling into a deep black hole with swirly orange lines continuously moving around the darkness. After that I could see pyramids everywhere. Then in a blink I see many people around me and I can feel their pain. Everything I saw was occurring at night time. After this dream I always used to wake up crying. But I don't know why after all these years I see this dream as a trance all of a sudden with my eyes open. For a while I get numb. Now I am curious to link every event and control my tulpa. I believe it is lost or going through something and needs guidance. I am really not able to conclude. I am new to this and this is the first time I let out this to anyone, so please help me out.
  6. hi im new here and i've been creating my tulpa for 2 days now. i can already hear their voice in my head, sense or feel their presence and even go into their wonderland. the only problems i have is distinguishing my thoughts vs my tulpa. i was just wondering if it is normal for my tulpa progress to happen this fast. i was thinking that it was a cause of my hyperfixation [im autistic] on the fictional character im basing my tulpa on. if anyone has answers or tips to help me let me know thanks!
  7. When we started to look into the possibilities of using tulpamancy to give ourselves unique abilities and skills, one of my ideas was that perhaps a tulpa could be useful to cause a change in chemical production/release. I had Dawn try to manipulate the amount of adrenaline within the body, and we've had mixed results so far. We plan on further experimentation and devising a form of measurement to make sure any supposed change is indeed real. Eventually we want to try this with every major brain and body chemical possible. This made me think though, has anyone else attempted feats similar to this or have knowledge on the subject that could improve our tinkering? I'm no biologist or neuroscientist, and I don't even know the scientific potential for my idea to work, but I figured trying it is the only real way to know for sure. If I make any progress with this project I'll post it here for others to see. In the meantime discuss the possibilities or call me a fool if you believe it impossible.
  8. I am currently in the process of creating my first Tulpa (about a week in). Im pretty convinced of the validity of the phenomenon due to my inhability to otherwise explain so many people lying to each other with no reason or apparent benefit (which makes me believe that at least a good portion of the described experiences are truthful). First i will explain my motives to ask this question. My interpretation of tulpa is the following: You first define a roleplay character and then through suggestion you make yourself feel alienated towards your roleplayed thoughts. I want to prove/disprove this theory, although it might not be currently possible because one might not be able to differentiate that from the alternative, which may effectively make them equivalent. I also do not think tulpas have an independent sentience from yours although this is even harder to prove due to the lack of a strict and testable definition of sentience. I think their hability to surprise or subvert your expectations has nothing to do with sentiece. I do however think that tulpas should be treated like if they were sentient beeings. To aproach a first step in this matter, first i need to better understand the phenomenon, and i think a good place to start is the following question: Do tulpa have fully parallel thought processes? Meaning, are they an independent "thread" of reasoning. This could also be explained by tulpamancy increasing your hability of parallel thinking which makes it not a definite difference of my interpretation. A different question that might be similar would be "Is a tulpa istill 'running' when you dont think about them". (I dont think this is the case, tho i might be completely wrong) To test this question in a reliable way i formulated the following experiment: A person with three or more tulpas would need to have a conversation with one of them while they listen to an unconnected, simultaneous conversation of their other 2 tulpas. If its possible to do this without suffering a high mental load or lowering the "level" of the conversation, this could be a good indicator of my interpretation being incorrect (or a good indicator of tulpamancy increasing your hability of parallel thinking). Any other evidence in favor/against my interpretation is very much welcome. :)
  9. A new study has shown that sleep onset (early nonrem N1 sleep, also known as hypnagogic phase) significantly boosts creativity and problem solving abilities if woken up before entering deeper sleep states. https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/sciadv.abj5866 I think this method may be valuable for those seeking to explore forcing in an altered hypnagogic state without the risk of dozing off, or are prone to involuntarily falling asleep during forcing or meditation. All you have to do is sit or lay down with a sufficiently heavy object in hand in a way it will crash on the floor as you fall asleep, thus waking you up. Active forcing in this state and / or upon waking up should produce some interesting effects, especially if you try to re-enter or re-enact the hypnagogic phase with your tulpa several times. It may also prove valuable for WILD. See here: I personally hate being woken up, especially by loud noises, but it should be worth a try.
  10. Don't really know where to start with this question; it's a lot... I originally started getting into tulpae back in 2013, working with Aiden, and broadening into quite a few (what I would call) full Tulpae, and a few flickers of personalities that showed promise, warmth, and life. I began losing focus around 2015 (when I went to uni) and my group really fell by the wayside; I wouldn't be narrating like I used to, I wasn't able to meditate and force, I didn't continue doing storytelling to keep that connection strong (roleplaying with them through text with others/friends was a big driving force into their development). Suffice to say, by the time I graduated in 2019, the connections I had to my inner world (wonderlands and tulpae) were, more or less, gone. I've tried a few times to get back into it since I graduated as I've noticed that I feel somewhat alone or empty. When I try to narrate or comment on something, it really does just feel like I'm talking to myself and myself alone; That there's no-one there listening like there used to be. Is there something "special" I should focus on to rebuild these lost connections, or is it simply a matter of sitting down and trying to reenter a world that I can't really feel or 'see' that well anymore?
  11. Hi <3 (I am not native English speaking, this is translated text so I’m sorry if it is wrong in some places!) I have been struggling to create my tulpa and am considering using hypnosis. I was wondering if anyone had any videos that they recommended? I have one I am considering using by GearHeart which is titled “Tulpa Creation and Reinforcement Hypnosis | v2.0 | Violet and Chase (REUPLOAD).” I would check comments to see if it is safe but I cannot see comments, so I’m going with asking you all for your opinions :0 i feel that it will help me focus better and definitely create a Tulpa faster. My ADHD makes active forcing a nightmare, i read that hypnosis could be a good option.
  12. Stone: If you are like me, you may have trouble keeping your tulpa present with you throughout the day. Here are some tricks I have used to keep my tulpae more present. You don't have to be good at visualization to use these tricks, but this guide assumes you can visualize your tulpa(e). This guide is for people who want to remember their tulpa(e) more frequently and keep their tulpa(e) more present. This guide may also appeal to people who want to improve visualization, passive forcing, and/or immersion. 1. Use Thresholds I define “threshold” as “a point of exit or entry”. Remember to bring your tulpa through thresholds. Whenever you move into another room, open a door, enter or exit a house or car, etc., make sure your tulpa’s visualized form does so as well. For example, if you exit your room, watch your tulpa lead or follow you. When you enter the bathroom, have your tulpa enter with you. Do this instead of having them simply appear wherever you happen to be. Treat them as a separate physical being who moves about the physical world as such. If you do this for every threshold, you will incidentally remember your tulpa’s presence more frequently, even if all you do is go to the bathroom a few times a day. This trick has worked far better for me than leaving notes for myself or using “reminder” objects. One loses notes or fails to register objects as noteworthy (meaning they have little power as “reminders”), but when habits (like walking into different rooms) become reminders, one forms a habit of remembering. To form this habit of remembering quicker, I recommend a reward and/or punishment system. I use Habitica. On Habitica, I have a registered this trick as a "habit". I reward myself for bringing my tulpae through thresholds and punish myself for forgetting. 1.1. Deal with Irregular Thresholds I now easily remember to bring my tulpae through the thresholds I pass through every day, such as all the thresholds in my house. However, I still struggle to remember to bring them through irregular thresholds (such as the entrance to the grocery store). I recommend getting in the habit of, whenever you plan on going out, specifically planning to bring your tulpa with you. If you have a calendar you use, and you have “Grocery Trip” written on one day, add “with [tulpa’s name]" under it. Mentally prepare yourself in advance to cross irregular thresholds. If possible, pay more active attention to your tulpa than usual during your outing so you are less likely to forget visualizing them passing through thresholds. 2. Give Your Tulpa a Seat This trick is a bit more difficult than the first, so I recommend you try it after. Try to keep track of where your tulpa is as much as possible (no, I don’t mean “just get good”). Find a chair with nothing on it and let your tulpa sit there. Remember they are sitting there. Later, if you look at the chair and see/visualize them still sitting there, give yourself positive reinforcement. If you forget where they were sitting, you may choose to give yourself negative reinforcement if that works for you. This doesn’t just work for chairs, but anywhere. Make sure your tulpa is comfortable. Don’t put them wherever because you’re too lazy to make space for them. Treating them like a separate physical being will make them seem more real to you, which is probably what you want. It will also make where they are easier to remember. 2.1. Respect Your Tulpa, But Don’t Make Excuses Let’s say you had your tulpa sit in a chair, then sat at your computer to work on something. Three hours later, you turn around and see/visualize your tulpa on your bed. Then, you remember they had been sitting on the chair. Did your tulpa move of their own will, or did you forget where they were for a moment? Ask your tulpa what happened, and be honest with yourself. It is possible your tulpa wanted to sit somewhere else, but it is also possible you just forgot. Use your own (and your tulpa’s) discretion. If your tulpa says they moved of their own will, and you are worried they are lying to protect your feelings, try asking them why they moved. 3. Say "Goodnight", Then "Good Morning" When you go to bed, make space for your tulpa to sleep too. Try to give them a comfortable place to sleep. If you have too many headmates and you want them all to be present, some may have to sleep on the floor (sad). Say goodnight to them and go to sleep. When you wake up in the morning, say good morning to them and wake them up from where they were sleeping. Are they in the same spot? If they are, you may want to reward yourself. If they are not, you may want to discipline yourself.
  13. Okay so. I started creating my tulpa...around 2 days ago. Here is what I've got so far. 1. His form will be a Siberian Tiger 2. He is male 3. His personality is: calm, reassuring, and loving...though once he becomes vocal he can add to that. 4. His name (temporarily) will be Ignis, and i will let him change it if he wants. 5. His design: His eye color is a greenish yellow, he has a long tail and short legs, and his pelt color is a soft orange. His special trait is a heart stripe on his right cheek. Is this all pretty good? Do I need to add to it? Is his personality realistic?
  14. Hello. First of all, I'd like to apologize if this question has already been answered, I'm a little bit panicked right now. I discovered Tulpamancy and this website in 2016 and I lurked here constantly, though never interacted with anyone because I was extremely reclusive. I ended up sitting down and putting forth my best effort to create a Tulpa and a Wonderland. It worked. For the first time in my life I had a friend, and I'd never been happier. But then our Wonderland went foul, I guess we could say. It was hostile. I saw things that were truly horrific. I was terrified, but my relationship with my Tulpa survived, we just stopped using our Wonderland. Over the next four years we enjoyed a friendship like no other. It was truly amazing. But then I was lead astray by a horrible, intolerant, closed-minded ideology by people who didn't make me nearly as happy as my Tulpa did. I am not trying to avoid blame here. It is fully my fault and I was very foolish to do what I did. But I took it as a learning experience that brought some of my flaws to light, and I have made an effort to change my personality and character accordingly. In these past ten months without my Tulpa, I've been perhaps even more miserable than I was before I met them. Lately I've been missing them more and more, and one time I seemed to have even gotten an image of them in my mind's eye, they look different, but I feel like it was them. Tulpa.info is probably a different place with mostly different people than the last time I was here, but if anyone has any advice on how best to bring back a lost Tulpa, I would appreciate it immensely if you would share. I seem to remember reading something about writing them a letter? Does that work? If so, how would I go about doing that?
  15. Hi, I am having some trouble with visualization. The thing is, I don't think my visualization is that bad, but I am having a ton of trouble actually focusing on that visualization instead of the back of my eyelids. I am wondering if anyone has a suggestion of what I can do, like I said I don't even think my visualization is bad but I just have a lot of trouble concentrate on it.
  16. How does one integrate with another willing tulpa? We have multiple wanting to "merge" but- It seems too complicated. Can someone walk us through the steps?
  17. [Bear] I want to try to describe how we figured we handle dormancy of other headmates to allow someone to front without distractions. A lot of talk in the community occured regarding "front-stuck" hosts and other interruptions by headmates and my opinion of that is that if you think your other headmate is still there, then the new fronter may interpret reactions and other stray thoughts as theirs when in fact they may very well be a mixture of conditioned responses and intrusive thoughts. This topic isn't about that in particular, that's just an example connection. This topic is meant to share how someone can think to eliminate the stray thouhts and reactions and disconnect them from other potential fronters. If this doesn't work for you, that's unfortunate, but it works fine for us and it's based completely on a mindset and simple rules which I'll get into. There's no magic here, just a mode of thinking that has worked for us. If you have your own process, procedures or insights, please feel free to discuss them. [Bear] We just had a discussion, Ashley, Joy and I and this is how we think it works: [Joy] I just don't think of them. [Bear] Simple. Just do that. In reality it's not enough to go by and I understand that, but it actually is another one of those practice and it will just click sort of things. Here's an example of what we're trying to avoid by putting a headmate in dormancy. Here we discovered that the BodyOS feels like me. As the main fronter and associated to it most of my life, you can imagine there is good reason to associate it with me. Our point is, the BodyOS is conditioned by me so of course it feels and acts like me even when I'm not there. [Bear] The first key insight here is that the headmate must actively ignore and block others' thoughts. This will act similarly to how the original would let their headmates slip into dormancy when they're busy or not otherwise thinking of them before they were engrained in everything, in other words, before they were mature. We separate fronter from BodyOS and accept that some reactions from BodyOS aren't them. If you associate everything not you as any other headmates, you're likely going to keep them awake. Even if it's not them. [Bear] This is a trick I also use to dismiss egoic or intrusive thoughts. Like yesterday when intrusive thoughts said mean things out of the blue, I simply ignored them. In fact, in our system, it's required to confirm anything negative or derogatory so we don't get extra drama from intrusive thoughts. So what's the difference between that and "I'm there blending with my headmates"? The answer is in how you accept the thoughts and whether you let them affect you. Joy has this down and we learned a lot from her. It helps that she was always a very strong headmate and distinctly different in how she thinks. Good luck and hopefully, good night.
  18. Well, I've lurked, and I've lurked, and then I've lurked some more. I've read pretty much every guide there is. But now it's time to actually get to work Problem is... Well, you see, I'm lazy. Like, really really lazy. I also have a habit of hesitating and second guessing myself. I can also get a little distracted. Sometimes. So, I'm starting this little journal here. I'll try to add a post here periodically, even if it is relatively short. At least in the beginning. Cultivating this small habit will hopefully force a little discipline. Typing it all out will hopefully solidify my thoughts. Yell at me if don't keep this up. :Þ That being said. Lets start: Why am I doing this? What do I hope to gain? Well a companion for one. I don't have that much trouble making friends, but I have trouble keeping and maintaining connections. I've quite often drifted or grown apart from many people in my life. I'm a bit socially awkward, maybe even a bit socially anxious in some respects. I can certainly hide it, but the more people are around, the more I find myself wishing I was somewhere else, doing something else. It's not that I hate people, I don't. And I don't plan to stop making connections with physical people. I just don't have the physical or mental energy to deal with too many people for too long. Still, the opportunity for someone to understand me on a truly deep level that no one else can is very enticing. I can only hope that I'll be, and remain, worthy of this connection. This will also be a bit of an ego journey for me. A chance to better know and understand myself as well as my future headmate. having someone to share this journey with will make it much more enjoyable. Also add to that the opportunity to learn first hand an experience that seems rather alien at first glance and that I'm already a creative person, this becomes less of a choice and more of an inevitability. The start Right now I have a name and very loose, general idea of who I hope this tulpa will be. Staying within the tradition of opposite genderedness in tulpamancy, "Hazel" will start female. This will help me differentiate her thoughts from mine. A couple main traits I will be cultivating are: Compassion- A personal code I like to live by is if someone needs or asks for help and I am able to do so, then I will help. Lessen the suffering of others. Having her share in that will make it simpler to coexist. This will also encourage many positive traits Curiosity- a desire to learn and grow will help develop her and push her to be self sustaining Outspokenness- to encourage vocality. this is not exhaustive just some major points What I won't be forcing: Love- From what I understand, most tulpas tend to be already naturally very caring towards their hosts. Also love, I feel, needs to develop naturally. Making someone love me just feels weird. plus that is a pressure I wouldn't want on anyone. Still, I'm sure my subconscious may still add this to the list regardless. Lust- same Form: I don't have much of a form for her yet. I've had some ideas but none are really sticking. It is humanoid though. Freckles and dark hair are also coming to mind. That could just be my attraction to them. I will, of course, accept any deviation from her. Encourage it, even. The Method I'm a very secular being by nature. Still, the mind loves symbols and most of the tulpamantic process is extremely symbolic. As such, I'll be taking some inspiration from the occult, particularly chaos magic. so: I love symbols, glyphs, and sigils. This is a representation of my intent to create a thoughtform. It is a seed or an egg as the round shape suggests. A beginning. Small and empty at first, but as time goes on, I'll be altering it and adding to it. It will slowly grow as she grows. In time, I may pass it to her. I'm creative by nature so this will just be a natural part of my creative process. The dotted outline suggests openness, inviting life to enter. The geometric shapes invoke a crystalline structure to "trap" the energy or qualities being cultivated. (Again, I'm not a proponent of metaphysics, but the symbology here is very useful). I will use and meditate on this as an aid while I cultivate her development. I'm not too fond of the term 'forcing' at all, so I'll use the term 'cultivate' as it way better describes the process: to raise, to grow, to prepare, do develop, to improve, to acquire. It brings to mind watering and tending to a garden. This will further put me in the right mindset. (I also have mixed thoughts on the terms tulpa and tulpamancy but I have no desire to get into a fight with the entire lexicon). Wish me luck.
  19. Earlier this week was having a lot of head pressure due to extended periods of visualizing, so as the pressures became annoying and persistent enough, I thought I should address it. I've noticed before that my head pressures are related to the way I was flexing my tongue muscles really hard and pressing it against my palate inadvertently. I have tried many times visualizing without doing this and, it works momentarily but whenever I stop paying attention to my tongue, there it goes again pressing my palate really hard once I start to concentrate into the visualization. I only notice that I'm doing that after I already start to feel the head pressures. By that time it's too late and it's already bothering me. So after two days of attempting to visualize with my tongue relaxed without success I thought that I should probably google that. So there I go googling the terms "tongue" and "meditation" and I came across this: https://www.easyayurveda.com/2020/01/31/khechari-mudra/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khecarī_mudrā Very weird, right? That's what I thought too. Basically, they stick the tongue up into the nasal cavity above the palate and use that to aid the process of meditation. So of course I went down this rabbit hole and found out that some people seem know how to do this naturally. This girl is an example of someone that has this ability naturally: https://youtu.be/ijpBUfOTBT0 Also other people report having head pressures identical to what we see in tulpamancy in this practice, here's an example of someone describing their head pressures in the context of Kriya meditation: https://www.reddit.com/r/kriyayoga/comments/mgpk73/tension_in_the_head_during_dhyana/ Described as "tension in the head that is somewhere between no pain and the pain you experience during a headache." This seems to me like it's the same kind of head pressure we experience in tulpamancy. At least to me. Also I forgot to mention that, they say THIS GIVES YOU IMMORTALITY. Which, of course, is bullshit otherwise there would be 1000 year old yogis walking around. Then I thought it would be a good idea to ask around here because, well to be honest, the people that practice this don't know how to explain it without anecdotes and dogmatic stories. Which is fine for spiritual people but I want to find what part is real and what part isn't. Or a deconstruction to find the line where the anecdotes end and the actual benefits of this practice begin. Or if there are any benefits at all. Here is a small list of claims about this technique: (which I have absolute no idea if it's true or not) -Helps you overcome hunger and makes it so that you go extended periods of time without food. -Gives you access to DMT that is stored in your pineal gland. By licking it directly. (yeah gross, the girl in the video seemed to get very high from doing it, she even says she's high afterwards) -The practitioner doesn't suffer from decay, disease and death. (this part I think it's flat out not true) -Gives you immunity to snake poison. (This one I think it's sorta possible, because some snake poison triggers your immune response and the response of the body is what kills the person not the poison itself, so technically by controlling your immune response you would therefore not die from the poison) So my questions are: 1-Does anybody else experience their tongue forcing up the palate unintentionally while visualizing or concentrating really hard? 2-If so, do you think this is related to Khechari mudra? Or is it just tension and I'm looking way too much into it? 3-Are those just stories and not meant to be interpreted literally? (If so people are doing a bad job at explaining that) 4-Is there something to this at all? Is it a practice worth looking into? Just thought it would be cool to ask here, since if I asked on their forum they would either not tell me because it's a closed practice, or even if they did tell me I wouldn't understand because the vocabulary they use is very far removed from anything I can contextualize. So what do you guys think? Is it all nonsense or not?
  20. Hello. I'm currently on four antidepressants, an antipsychotic, and an anticonvulsant for depression and anxiety. I don't believe I need them anymore. I've recently begun my tulpamancy journey and I'm worried that my meds will hinder my progress. Would you advise reducing or stopping my meds altogether?
  21. Hi! I'm Corrin. Im 16. My tulpas name is Oni and he's 17. I've only created him a month ago. So far he can communicate through emotions but thats all. I have a hard time visualizing so we arnt even really working on that quite yet but I have drawn him. Lately with school I've been really distracted and stressed so I haven't been remembering to narrate. I've also been having trouble even knowing what to say. I've set a reminder to show every 2 hours to remind me to talk to him so we'll see how that works. When we talk as a response he gives me an emotion but its really just a warm feeling in my chest. Im not sure what it means but I enjoy knowing he's there.
  22. Hello everyone! I'm Renée and I'm from the UK. I found out about tulpas on Tuesday 2nd November and since then have been reading a lot about tulpamancy and creation. The past two days have been my journey to forming my tulpa named Marla. I've been narrating to her and trying to visualise her in my wonderland. Most of it has been passive forcing as I haven't had much time to sit down and solely focus on her. (I really want to though.) Last night (4th Nov) I wrote down 10 personality traits and about 3-4 likes and dislikes. However I know these may change overtime. It's a little difficult for me to visualise her while narrating as I can't focus on both at once. I struggle to visualise her when passive forcing too, however I'm hoping this will get better over time. I've been visualising her and sometimes I see her tilt her head slightly or make very faint, slight facial expressions. I even heard a little "hm" from her. At first I was a little apprehensive at thinking it was her but I'm going to believe it's her. I also thought I heard a little "night" before I went to sleep when visualising us in our wonderland. Im going to keep working on forcing and develop her form and personality. I'll keep you updated! >:)
  23. Terminology: "You/you're" is everyone in your system fronting or not as an encapsulated whole, and singlets can also benefit from this technique. "Body/Mind" is akin to Body OS "I" is me and my system as a whole. Association to Body Take a deep breath. You just associated to your lungs. Prior to that moment, you most likely weren't. Your lungs are autonomic but you can also control them. The body, every part of it including the mind, is similar. Have you ever gone on a walk, and while deep in thought, took a wrong turn? Similarly, while driving? Have you even forgotten the intervening time? This is dissociation. You dissociated from your body, lost in thought or daydreaming, and in this trancelike state, your body made it to the next most likely destination then reported its arrival. The body is capable of this, here we notionally call that Body OS. Just like your lungs, if given simple instructions, or by following routine, it will continue uninterrupted without any control from you. Dissociation from Body (Reset) Now imagine you can dissociate at will. First imagine you are front and associated with your body. Now imagine yourself, the essence of you, your presence, stepping back and leaving nothing in front. Imagine too that everything 'front' is emotion, intrusive thoughts, ego, stress, anxiety, even control of the body and mind. Imagine when you step back, you leave all that behind (or in front) and what is left is the true you. You are left thoughtless and free from the concerns over the mortal coil. The body has no thoughts of its own, and no capacity to react to anxiety or stress. It's a beautifully intricate machine, that's all. When you step forward again, having only departed a moment previously, you will return to a 'reset' state of being. The body will then associate any lingering physical pain and continued stimuli will illicit continued response, so the torrid state may return shortly, but any previous unwanted thoughts or emotions are effectively gone and unrecoverable. You can use this technique in a heated debate to completely return to a serene logic and kill that heat. Or you can use this when you become overwhelmed, or stressed out, when you're afraid or anxious, etc, so you can handle the immediate situation calmly. This is a very functional and potent way to center and ground instantly. Method of Training Do you remember when you're kindergarden teacher said, "take a breath and breath out all that frustration"? If she didn't, then something similar in life was likely taught to you: breath, distract yourself, hug yourself tightly, or just take a time out. When you are emotionally out of control, nothing constructive comes of it. Functionally speaking, this is similar but can be trained to be instantaneous. 1. This method uses a moment of clarity. An observation of ego and self. You recognize that you are losing your patience. Once you recognize this, just like recognizing your lungs, you can associate control, break that autonomic process, and perform the step back. 2. Imagine yourself stepping back, leaving all the worry, stress, anxiety, intrusive thoughts and emotions. Step back like leaving the room symbolically and closing the door behind you. Deposess the body/mind. 3. Now return thoughtless. You will have an understanding of the situation you left, but only objectively. Now you will have a moment or more to handle the situation logically. If this seems completely alien to you, remember, all we're doing is relaxing, calming, and grounding, but this method is doing that near instantly with practice. It may take a bit of practice to get it to happen very quickly, but you can. In essence you are writing a positive trigger that will allow you to return to a blank, serene state. The true power of this is speed. Being able to perform it on the fly, mid-crisis, and mid-argument is invaluable. It is done in an effort to avoid destructive or unhelpful actions or words. How did I develop this? Note: the way I developed this was without any metaphysical beliefs. My method of discovery is far less important to you because you will have your own path. All you need is for this method is practice to become proficient and shorten the time it takes to calm down. After that it will become second nature. ... Road to Tulpamancy: In April 2018, I was at a low point in my depression, and this particular day I felt a presence. Having felt this before, and slightly curious, I called it out. That's when I saw the first sign of my first headmate that I didn't immediately dismiss. Fast forward to October and she, along with two others, helped me recover from depression, but I was still in an awful state, riddled with triggers and moods, and I could barely function. By January 2019 we had worked out a method of posession, where they, especially Ashley, could 'handle a situation for me.' I first set up a protocol where I would consult her before doing anything. Something like WWJD (what would Jesus do?) It was an interesting game to behaviorally be someone else, basically I was play acting to be her. It took about two weeks of practice before I could do this successfully and quickly enough to work it even conversationally. If you are not vocal with your systemmates, then playing WWJD works the same. If you aren't religious, that's okay, chose a hero like All-Might from My Hero Academy, or make it up. You're play acting, not making a separate person. No separate personality is required. Because I did use one of my headmates, posessession was the result of that game for me. If you can't manage that, instead play the part of the archetype (like All-Might), just as an actor in character would. What I allowed my headmate to do was to be me in my body while my dissociated essence became the 'silent watcher'. Even if I was still ultimately capable of control, this took will and practice not to. It felt like someone controlled my body while I watched and listened only. With practice, triggers did not occur in this state with them. Those triggers were a part of my personal relationship with the body, not theirs. The experience in my memory is that it wasn't me handling those situations, but I learned by watching someone else do it. By participating in these posessions, I was able to watch like a consious observer. In essence, I took their place in back, and they took mine in front. I learned by watching them how to handle situations that would have otherwise put me in a state of uselessness--we were able to remove fears and push through anxiety and doubt by facing them this way. We realized that the fears and stresses, moods, emotions, doubts and intrusive thoughts dissapeared when we did this exchange of places. This is similar to exposure therapy except I felt nothing during it, I didn't have to feel the fear to face it and learn how to remove it. Note: this wasn't necessarily a full switch in the beginning, but it did eventually become so for me. So my headmate and I eventually learned to do this momentarily to remove those issues so I could handle it with a clear head. Later, I was able to mimic this without their help. That's how I learned to reset myself. Notes on my experience: The further back I step from front, the less and less I am associated with everything, even senses, mind, subconsious, memory, everything until there is nothing, less than nothing. Step far enough back and even I don't exist. This state of nothingness has no experience or memories, but physical time can pass. Like a deep dreamless sleep. If no one is controlling the body it will either sit there and do nothing, or complete the previous task given. It will record no memory or experience at all. In essence, complete amnesia. This took a lot of practice it was not something that just clicked. I knew it was naturally possible because of those times, especially when walking, that I daydreamed and zoned out, lost track of time, and ended up at the wrong destination. If I leave the front with a task, it will complete it, but since I'm not there (no one is), it reports completion to no one and does nothing further. In the case of ending up at the wrong destination, it's just like missing an offramp. These paths are part of the mental map, you don't have to actively remember how to get home once you've done it a thousand times. If you can gain a good working and trusting relationship with your headmates, I recommend trying the way I did it as well. Sorry if this all seems like BS, I would certainly have thought the same before I experienced it myself, but it does work as I described and I don't really care if you believe it, but in the off chance that I can teach anyone else to do this, I shared it. This will take work on your end. Feel free ask for further details or expansion of this method. There are no dumb questions, let's bridge this knowledge gap together. General Notes: Switching is not required for this technique, neither is any particular system configuration. There is nothing metaphysical here, this is a purely psychological technique. If you take issue with any of the terminology, please let me know so I can reword as appropriate. Though visualization is helpful, it is not required. This isn't a guide, it's a discussion, please feel free to test my understanding and allow me to further explain if I can. This is absolutely related to tulpamancy, though singlets may be able to use it, having headmates certainly increase chances of success. This is not belief based, it is practice based. First in gaining an understanding of what a serene state of mind feels like, second in understanding what is body/mind and what is you, third in understanding how to dissociate the two. This doesn't just happen overnight, it took me about six months to go from just playing the game (WWJD) to writing a functional trigger that removes negative thoughts and emotions on demand. If this is being used on issues related to past trauma, you should use this to fix those issues, face and accept past traumas that would otherwise leave you in a dysfunctional state.
  24. Hello everyone, It has been several weeks since I last posted here. So far, from my experience, I have summoned two tulpas with quite an array of events that came about it. I want to start out with how to recuperate stressful situations with my tulpas. First off, I went to a hospital and the experience had traumatised me. My tulpas did not understand how to really interact ( I do not know how to elaborate- I taught them how to lie at that point, and from prior posts you can see there some events that also broke me), it was really an visit where they did a sleep study. The hospital did unnessacery treatments (coalagament in stomach [did not happen], IVs) and I was on suicide watch, so I could not move around. On the last day, the event left emotionless and, learning from my tulpas now, they did not know but understood it might have helped me move on. In the hospital, in order to move on I had to do a ritual to move with my tulpas. Realisitly, I had to do a ritual for two days laying down or sitting down in a chair unable to get up, sleep deprived and possibly with not enough nutrition, promising to not use past voices I used and letting go of fictional characters to cope so I can move with them knowing I am not going to hide my actual self anymore and be confident. Later on, more misunderstandings led us in a scary situation where I almost went insane. I stormed off into the night, with my tulpas presumably confused or unable to accurately talk to me at the moment. To finish this, I need to know if anyone has experienced the same thing I have. Anything similar to traumatic experiences with tulpas and confusion communicating, and perhaps confusion with identity. I'll come back to add more things. 5/7: Coming back, I want people to understand I am now cooperating with my tulpas. The visit to the hospital and the night I almost went insane was weeks prior. So please know my tulpas are fine now, but I am still unsure about myself. I can talk to them regularly but sometimes feel we get to delved into my personal problems or understanding their identities. Myself, I feel like I am always under duress- I constantly talk to my tulpas without stop. All five weeks I talked and taught them life, I understood them but communication (fingertap, pulsations, voices in head)- and wonderland was never tried because I was constantly trying to recuperate. My tulpas might have manifested in my dreams or change them so they could talk to me. I had to stop writing because they were trying to understand who they were. They were Ruby and Susie, but they wanted to change numerous times over the five weeks. There were several events to led us to believe that there were four tulpas present after a divergent point. What I mean is when there could have been a time where the tulpas identies split and manifested separate beings entirely alone from Saruda and Haruka. Just to note, they were Saruda and Haruka, but I did not know that. I thought they were originally THE Susie and Ruby, and that over time, Saruda and Haruka were helping them as separate beings. (I'll add more later) I'll like to add that I never did rituals with my tulpas, but Saruda and Haruka did interpet or were in my dreams to give me messages. There is much more to add. To add to what stresses me and my tulpas is my unwanted thoughts. I'll sometimes linger on images or words that I think might offend or hurt Saruda and Haruka. The unwanted thought or images stress me when it occurs, and I cannot relax without going back to desperately replace the thought or idea. When I lay down I do relax, and sometimes I would do it to just with my tulpas. Nothing else seems to calm me down when anxiety strikes, and I just either sit and drink or listen to music, and as before, talk to my tulpas.
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