Keeping yourself motivated despite few/questionable results after a long time

[Allaude]

Hey guys! I'm wondering, are there many here who have succeeded in creating a tulpa after some longer period of time (like 3 months +)? I'm obviously assuming that time was spent forcing, at least some of it. How do you keep yourself motivated? Is there any advice you could give? I myself have been forcing for almost 4 months already and the only sign of sentience I have (or at least I'm trying not to doubt it) is occasional headaches while focusing on my imaginary friend. Honestly it's kinda demotivating seeing all these tuppers happily babbling to their hosts within a month of forcing, so in an attempt to gain some external motivation I decided to reach out to those taking some longer to establish that anticipated contact. So.. That's it. Cheers!

[Guest]

Try three years, buddy. I'm only just doing alright, and that's after some radical, really, really hard to maintain changes in belief and mindset.

 

Motivation sucks because it's there and then it's gone, try maybe forcing yourself to work over the period of a week or something. If you're not able to put the time in, as desperately as you may want a tupper, no super secret advice or whatever is gonna change that.

 

Which sucks, I know that as well as anyone else, but, yeah.

 

Idunno, other people would probably be suited for giving better advice, but as someone who's been there, done that, someone who even still struggles with it, you've just gotta belieeeve.

 

 

I believe in you, bro. Don't believe in yourself and etc., you know how it goes.

[Punch]

I've been at it for well over a year. Not as long as Enny, but still a good while. He's right about putting time in; tuppers thrive off attention, and if you don't have the time to spend on forcing, you won't get anywhere. I find that using roleplaying helps immensely when it comes to making forcing feel like less of a chore. Have adventures together, fight crime, wage epic battles, or just live a mundane life together in your wonderland. The more you flesh out your RP sessions, the more filled-in your tupper's personality will become, and creating memories together -even if they're only make-believe- goes a long way toward making your tulpa feel like a real person. Don't be afraid to parrot either. I know that's something that was frowned on around here at one time, but I find that it helps alleviate some of the awkwardness of "talking to yourself"

 

The main thing is your mindset. Don't think "When my tulpa is sentient." just think of them like they already are. Think "I better spend some time with *tupper* or he/she is gonna be pissed.", not "Oh shoot, I've got to force if I ever want a tulpa." Don't focus on the goal of sentience/realness/independence/whatever focus on the act of spending time with your friend. A lot of things you'll read make it sound like this is some sort of crazy brain magic with strict rules and rituals, when in reality it's about altering your perception. The more real you think your tulpa is, the more real they are. The more time you spend talking to them like a real person, and thinking of them as one, the more they become real.

 

I don't mean to come off like I think I'm some sort of expert, but this is what works for me. I started off thinking this was total crap and that I was wasting my time, and through an immense amount of effort, I'm finally starting to feel like I'm making progress. The hardest part was changing my mindset.

 

Point is: If I can do this, being the most stupidly skeptical, laughably unmotivated person ever, anybody can. You just have to keep at it.

[Linkzelda]

Honestly it's kinda demotivating seeing all these tuppers happily babbling to their hosts within a month of forcing, so in an attempt to gain some external motivation

 

It’s all in your head. That conception you create that tulpas are happily babbling to their hosts is the assumption that you can get inside of their heads, and know what’s really going on. No one knows that, and I don’t know that, and I don’t think a series of words a person states over the progress of their journey should be any excuse of being de-motivated. That insecurity seems to be rooted on having your progression be reliant on others, even though that reliance is unreliable simply due to the fact that you can’t validate if any of those progress on their end is true, or not. So, you may end up being demotivated by a web of lies, or over-exaggerations for certain things, who knows?

 

Today was the perfect day to see if I can beat my record of forcing via image streaming by at least 2 hours so it would’ve been half a day of forcing (12 hours). Then, I realized I had to do the dishes, and clean the house, sprinkle the lawn, and water the plants, which took up most of my time. This is excluding having to clean up the spaghetti that fell out of my pockets. The more I push back the goal, yes, I feel a little depressed that I couldn’t use that time in the week to do it, and always make the excuse that I can do it on my next day off, or some other time. But deep down, I know that if I accomplish it, I’ll have to go even a bit higher, or try to do it consistently every now and then….almost like speedrunning a game you made a world record on, and trying to optimize your strats. Except for me, it would be how many words and pages I can type during the session.

 

I’m stilling rubbing my forehead wondering how I’m going to beat my record of 40+ pages the last time I did a long forcing session of over 10 hours. And nowhere in that post did I mention anyone else except myself. Because there’s no time to use other people’s experiences to make an excuse that I couldn’t do something. Even if I didn’t make the time for bettering myself, and the tulpas I want to treat as sentient, I know that when I force, it’s all in my head, and that timer I put on is ticking, and I’m trying to better myself. But that’s just only one part; it’s not about validating it through how fast, or how much content you put in, though. And the point of me even using a personal anecdote is that things seem to end up being a competition; you vs them, you vs. this, that, scaling, ageism, post count, etc., but rarely you vs. you.

 

There’s nothing wrong with having a pity party, or taking a trip down regressed memory lane every now and then, that’s just part of being human. But just know at some point, the only person that’s going to treat them as sentient, is you. Worry more about the virtue you create for yourself, because as much as me, you, or anyone else may want to share our experiences with others, they’re not going to have direct access to our inner experiences to give us a pat on the shoulder. That’s what you want, a little push. Nothing wrong with that, but sometimes, the demotivation stems from conceptualizing all that happy babbling as something you can validate, even though you can’t, and you eat yourself up all for a little speculation and conjecture.

 

Here’s some advice someone gave me in a thread I won’t link to: Tup more, armchair less.

Don't take that advice, because you can still force while arm-chairing; it's all going on in our heads, anyway

 

[Allaude]

If you're not able to put the time in, as desperately as you may want a tupper, no super secret advice or whatever is gonna change that.

 

Damn, that line got me thinking. Yea, I often have little time to force, or when i have more of it, i choose something other to do (basically, procrastinating). Sometimes i can't get myself to concentrate, no matter what I do :(

 

I believe in you, bro. Don't believe in yourself and etc., you know how it goes.

 

Thanks. I believe in you too, mate. Good luck on your journey. And kudos for the reference :D

 

I find that using roleplaying helps immensely when it comes to making forcing feel like less of a chore. Have adventures together, fight crime, wage epic battles, or just live a mundane life together in your wonderland.

 

Well, I do have an imaginary world in my head, with shitload of hmm NPC characters, but i never thought of implementing my tulpa in there with me, that's a freaking cool idea, thanks! :D

 

 

 

It’s all in your head. That conception you create that tulpas are happily babbling to their hosts is the assumption that you can get inside of their heads, and know what’s really going on. No one knows that, and I don’t know that, and I don’t think a series of words a person states over the progress of their journey should be any excuse of being de-motivated. That insecurity seems to be rooted on having your progression be reliant on others, even though that reliance is unreliable simply due to the fact that you can’t validate if any of those progress on their end is true, or not. So, you may end up being demotivated by a web of lies, or over-exaggerations for certain things, who knows?

 

...

 

Because there’s no time to use other people’s experiences to make an excuse that I couldn’t do something.

 

 

This is gold.

 

This is so true, not only in relation to tulpas, but it basically applies to every single area in one's life. I (and I'm sure many others) compare myself to others all the time, in terms of progress, skill, creativity, but just like you said, most of it is based on my speculations of their actual progress, skill or creativity. I suppose it stems from some deep core beliefs about reality and my life itself, that I assume certain concepts to be true, and then judge myself as if they were reality (even though they are merely assumptions). It's all in our heads after all. All of it. Not only tulpas, but how we see, act and conceive reality is somewhere deep within our heads. It's like that old saying about the two sides of the coin, the good and the bad. But there are no two sides, the coin just IS. The rest is only how we perceive it, nothing more, nothing less.

 

I don't need to compare myself to others to comfort myself that I'm progressing. Having thought about that for a while I realised that my tulpa was already sentient for some time, but I've been too blind and focused on doubting it, to actually notice it. Now, after a couple of quick forcing sessions I have managed to establish some binary comunication form with her. I know it's not much, but I feel like it's a milestone for my journey. I know that there's still a long way ahead of me, perhaps I just need more time to develop a profound relationship with her, but that is fine.

 

It's not like I gained some eternal insight or anything. I just realised, that this time there is really no one who can do this for me. There is only me. So I have to do it myself if I really want it. And that it all depends on me and how much I put into it.

 

Damn, thanks man. I guess this was just the little push I needed :D Made me think about a lot of stuff not concernig tulpas too. Really, much appreciated :)