Devolping values for a Tulpa after creation

[Tirisilex]

In the past, I have read posts from people who complained about their Tulpa misbehaving. Sometimes their Tulpa would even threaten their host. I've read that some Hosts fear their Tulpa. I have come up with nine Guidelines to help develop a Tulpa and help it grow as a more compassionate being.

 

1 - When your Tulpa behaves well spend time with it and give it attention. Play a video game with it or Watch a Movie. Read a book or Graphic Novel. Do something that it enjoys. Ask it what it likes to do and do it. Send it feelings of Happiness or Joy.

 

2 - When a Tulpa Misbehaves you may need to Punish it to show that its behavior isn't acceptable. To punish it you could deprive it of a fun activity. Like not playing a Video game or watching a movie or reading a book. Explain to your Tulpa why you are punishing it and that the misbehavior is unacceptable.

 

3 - When doing household chores share yourself with your Tulpa as you do them. This will help develop self-importance.

 

4 - Take time to explain what Death is and the finality of it. How it is a bad thing and that if and when you die they will as well. It's a fact of life.

 

5 - Teach them about suffering and pleasure and how all beings do not want to suffer including your Tulpa. Therefore it should not want others to suffer if it does not want to suffer itself. Let them know they should have a positive attitude and not a negative one. Use examples of what suffering is. Ask them what it doesn't like and why. Let them know that that is suffering and it should not cause suffering to you or other systemmates because just as it doesn't want to suffer so do you and your systemmates. Ask it how it feels when you say "I hate you!" and explain that that causes its feelings to be hurt and that is suffering. So, therefore, it should not wish suffering on others.

 

6 - Act morally in your day to day relationships to show your Tulpa what a good relationship is. The more it see's you care for others the more it will learn to care as well.

 

7 - If you get upset with your Tulpa when it does nothing wrong. Maybe because you had a rough day and you're cranky. Apologize to it and show it that you care.

 

8 - When watching TV or reading a book or graphic novel praise good deeds that people do in the storyline. this helps make the Tulpa think that being good is cool

 

9 - If you are a praying type and like to pray. Pray that your higher power whatever that is will teach your Tulpa how to behave. I did this and it worked for me.

[Luminesce]

Putting things in cages will never, ever help anything. It's antithetical to being a living thing. As far as this advice goes (not that I approve or even think it's necessary), a "cage" could simply mean leaving them alone in the wonderland or some such, basically not spending time with them.

 

But I mean, you shouldn't do that in the first place..

 

But you are schizophrenic, yes? These seem like healthy rules for someone who needs to maintain a strong hold on their imagination and general goings-on in their mind, while still practicing tulpamancy. While the average host shouldn't need to punish their tulpa or anything like that, for those who may, I'd say this is a good guide. You've got my (officially, valueless) approval.

[Tirisilex]

Putting things in cages will never, ever help anything. It's antithetical to being a living thing. As far as this advice goes (not that I approve or even think it's necessary), a "cage" could simply mean leaving them alone in the wonderland or some such, basically not spending time with them.

 

But I mean, you shouldn't do that in the first place..

 

But you are schizophrenic, yes? These seem like healthy rules for someone who needs to maintain a strong hold on their imagination and general goings-on in their mind, while still practicing tulpamancy. While the average host shouldn't need to punish their tulpa or anything like that, for those who may, I'd say this is a good guide. You've got my (officially, valueless) approval.

 

When you were a child didn't your parents tell you to go to your room for punishment?? that's like putting you into a cage. Besides, it's only for a short time throughout the day it's not like you are leaving them in the cage for days or anything. However ignoring them while they are in the wonderland is just as good I guess.

[Luminesce]

There's still things to do in my room. Restricting freedom and restricting movement are kinda different things; cages are really bad for any living thing.

[GrayTheCat]

I like that this guide points out that the Host shouldn't be afraid to punish bad Tulpa behavior. I don't like the cage terminology... I get the concept, but a room and a cage have a different connotation. You would put an animal in a cage because the animal would hurt someone or a human in a cage (jail) for the same reason.

 

From our experience, having a Tulpa nap or be elsewhere is kind of like putting them on pause. I don't know if putting them in time out would be super effective for every situation, but it would give the Host a chance to sort things out by themselves or take a break until they are ready to handle the situation. I would assume chaining a Tulpa down would be a last straw measure to get things back under control because the Host is worried that their Tulpa would hurt them (in an extreme/emergency manner), but not as a lesson for bad manners.

 

I think some of these steps assume that a "Tulpa" can't read your mind. Again, this may vary between systems, so this assumption may be for the better, I don't know for sure. I believe I remember you mentioning you were studying a parenting guide as a reference, which is reasonable but it would explain why the perspective is a little out of place. To translate from a parental guide to Host guide, I would recommend something like "communicating more with your Tulpa" rather than "demonstrate what x means".

 

This may not be an issue for everybody, however the leaking of the Host's negative emotions can be mistaken for a Tulpa's bad behavior. For example, I used to get really freaked out when Ranger would do something mean or scary. For example, (WARNING: Graphic)

Ranger has threatened my life and I had visualizations of him stabbing me or ripping my guts out. Sometimes he would insist he's a demon or whatever crazy crap. The reality was I was anxious and he lost control of himself. Ranger is very sweet and he never meant to do any of the things I imagined at the time.

However, I knew that the scary stuff didn't define who he was. If I punished him for this, it may have made the situation way worse, especially since this issue was resolved by acknowledging the fact my anxiety can distort my ability to communicate with Ranger.

However if my issue included unacceptable possession/imposition, then the issue would need to be approached on a completely different level entirely. Seriously, if your Tulpa is possessing you without permission then that's a problem. If they are inflicting imposed pain, that's abuse. The cage idea may need to be considered if these issues are going on.

 

 

Aside from all of that, I don't mind this guide. I know some Tulpamancers would like to have this resource. Just if the difference between a "naughty Tulpa" and "dangerous Tulpa" are clearly differentiated then this guide is pretty nice. Since Ranger was never super naughty, I can't speak too much for that stuff.

 

I know it's a small thing, but I would prefer if Tulpas were addressed as "he/she/they/them" instead of "it", I have the weird feeling "it" dehumanizes the subject. If I'm being weird and nitpicky you can ignore this last comment...

 

Rule #10: "I love you!"

[Apollo Fire]

This guide comes off as being written by someone with a very poor grasp on what a tulpa actually is. There is no need to teach your tulpa about death or morals, as they already share the same brain as you and will already understand those concepts the moment they are introduced to them. 

 

1- you should spend time with your tulpa as often as possible and not just as "reward" for good behavior. A tulpa isn't a pet that you give treats once they do a trick. They're a person who you signed up to care for and not train like an animal.

 

2 - That is DEFINITELY not the way to approach having a tulpa - thinking you should punish them for bad behavior and are justified in doing so. A host is in a position of total power, and using that to punish your tulpa like that would be just cruel, especially when a tulpa can't actually hurt anyone unless through possession (which YOU allow them to do and can take back control at any time). You'd be shaping a really damaged tulpa if you punished them like that, I can't even imagine how we'd turn out if our host had beeen so awful. Punishing a tulpa will just make the situation worse, as Cat pointed out. All you have to do is talk to a tulpa about why something they did is bad or how their behavior can improve.

 

3- You should share moments with your tulpa anyway, regardless of moral browbeating

 

4- Unnecessary - they share the same brain so they understand death

 

[align=justify]5- Unnecessary - they share the same brain so they understand suffering. It would be highly hypocritical of you to talk to them about suffering after forcing them into a symbolic cage anyway. 

[/align]

 

6- Unnecessary. A tulpa doesn't need to "learn" to care for others.

 

7- ...you should do that anyway?

 

8- Why should you need to do that at all? The tulpa shares the same brain as you and will already understand what makes a good character good or a bad character bad.

 

9 - what. This just makes the guide belong in the meta section.

 

Do you even know what a tulpa is? They are a second person in your brain that functiosn off of the same neural processes as you and have access to all of the information already stored there. They are not animals to be treated with rewards or punishments. They are people to be treated with love and respect - that is how they will turn out right. You don't need to reward or punish them, all you have to do is talk to them like a human being about what something they did was bad or how their behavior can improve. 99% of the time they will listen.

 

Tulpas don't turn out "bad" - they turn out immature or damaged. The only thing you have to do to an immature tulpa is talk to them and provide them with love, and they will turn out just fine. I guarantee all tulpas begin immature and eventually, through time and care, grow to be as mature as the host. And why wouldn't they? They live in the same brain as the host. 

 

The only way a tulpa would turn out damaged is if the host (or others outside the system) were cruel or mean to them - as your guide seems to be encouraging. If they are damaged, then the solution is love and care over time and talking to them about the issues like an actual human being. Then, they will heal.

 

This is absolutely misleading and unethical. Tulpas are not animals. All you have to do to make your tulpa turn out right is 1) love them and 2) talk to them. This guide is entirely dehumanizing - as shown by your use of the word "it." This almost makes me want to write a counter-guide. You fundamentally misunderstand tulpas and how to handle them.

 

Disapproved.

[Luminesce]

This guide comes off as being written by someone with a very poor grasp on what a tulpa actually is. There is no need to teach your tulpa about death or morals, as they already share the same brain as you and will already understand those concepts the moment they are introduced to them.

 

As I said, this is the type of thinking I often see with people who aren't in as much control of their mind. Especially people with schizophrenia and similar mental-discipline-impairing disorders, but also those with belief systems a little too out of their control. It is occasionally necessary to teach these things, in/to the systems who end up having tulpas do bad things/fall for invasive thoughts, if you know what I'm talking about. Though I guess you might not.

 

The guide won't be helpful for everyone, and of course things like this always have a chance of influencing people to cause their own problems in the first place. But still, for people like Tirisilex himself, this sort of guide is a good guide for those with little control over their thoughts to safely develop a tulpa.

 

I'm not GAT and I wouldn't necessarily argue this point even if I were, but I do want to point out that there is value in it. It's not universal, but at this point in time it seems like the slightly fringe guides are the only ones we're in need of, right? But maybe the aforementioned problems are too problematic. Not up to me.

[Dutch]

Why stop at caging your tulpa? Why not beat them or give them the belt?

 

I like the idea of praying to allah to let him smite them if they misbehave. Maybe you should write a guide about just that bit, I'm sure that'd be approved. The rest of this is pretty damn silly.

[GeorgePepper]

this is coming from my tulpa

claire: GET THIS OFF OF HERE. WE ARENT DOGS, YOU CAN TALK TO US IF WE FUCK UP, CAGES ARENT NECESSARY!

[Vos]

As others have clearly pointed out, most of this is either cruel (to the point where I'm unsure if you're serious or not), completely unnecessary, or just obvious. Disapproved.

[Tirisilex]

As others have clearly pointed out, most of this is either cruel (to the point where I'm unsure if you're serious or not), completely unnecessary, or just obvious. Disapproved.

 

I made this guide because there have been people who complained about their tulpa misbehaving. Like threatening their lives. Even I had to deal with my Tulpa because he had a strange idea of what reincarnation was and thought it was ok to threaten my life because I would just be reborn again and everything would be alright. And I didn't say for you to pray and smite your tulpa I said to teach it right from wrong. I don't see how most of this is cruel I took out the part about caging your tulpa.