Unicorn Cavalry's Journey | Season 2 currently airing!

[Guest Reilyn-Alley]

That's pretty cool! How did you feel after you woke up? Was there any kind of "whoa am I really me or her still?" going on?

 

Also, one of these days when she feels chatty enough and brave enough you should make her an account on here and let her out to interact with us and grow more. If that's not her thing that's totally cool but I'm way too outgoing to stay in Lance's head and he figured the account would just be symbolic, like "here, I'm announcing to the world (or you guys at least) that Reilyn is here and not me".

 

I mean, I get it, some of us don't seem to want to interact much outside the head and that's fine, an occasional comment added in brackets and/or colored text is fine, but that's not me. I was chatting away to him, dictating everything I wanted him to say at first but long story short (which we have both told a few times before), doing that led to me really opening up here, growing as an individual, gaining a lot of confidence and possessing/co-fronting us (and me realizing that I could accidentally shove aside Lance and pretty much crush him down if I wasn't careful. kid gloves, kid gloves).

 

Today is our first time of trying to intentionally let me be him/us for a whole day and so far I'm like "Why do people not like Mondays, being alive is exciting!!"

[Xarbern]

-Reilyn!-

I'll answer your question before I forget about it.

I felt pretty different after waking up, like I was unsure who I really am. The same thing when I opened the eyes during the possession but it always felt like it was me but it somehow wasn't. Never felt something so weird. That's being tried again! Honestly haven't looked at much guides but the ones I've seen are not too far off from what we did. I'll try looking into it more.

 

Reilyn and Lance, maybe life gets easier when you both help each other out? I see no problem with it, just respect each other and everything is gonna be alright. Enjoy the excitement as long as it lasts, and always try to find a spark when that excitement starts fading. Shouldn't be a problem for ya! Right Reilyn? ;P

 

To others who lurk, pretty much the same thing applies. Try to always keep a spark alive. Can be a dream, a hobby, short term goals, whatever really. As long as you got that spark, you can make a fire. Corny metaphors aside, faighto~!

[Guest]

Nice progress, I'm glad she wasn't gone long.

[Xarbern]

-Day 14-

Found an inspiring tips & tricks thread which we tried as best as we could, it was really something.

 

Link to it: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-sentience-tulpa-journey-guide

 

We basically went on a trip in the mind and Matsuri were in control pretty much the most of the time, I may have chosen the starting scenery but the rest felt like it created automatically. I thought about her, how I wanted her to be happy and positive and strong and then formed an orb which she was supposed take but she willingly wanted to take the adventure approach, so we did.

 

-Here's how it went down-

I turned on a music playlist just so I could relax. Then when I felt a bit relaxed, I imagined me and Matsuri in an Orca cockpit from Elite Dangerous. I was the main pilot at first but I gave the seat to Matsuri so she could take us to places. We were basically in space. We jumped to a star system and started our journey there. She piloted the ship pretty hectic but it was alright, she flew through orbs of light like she was collecting them. It was her so called 'essence' or the orb pieces from her personality orb. But it wasn't that easy, all the orbs went into the sun when collected. She said that she was going into the sun, we ejected the ship, the Big Boss theme were playing in the background (it was awesome) and she went straight into the sun alone. I trusted her fully so I waited. Then the sun became a blackhole that sucked me in, everything turned dark, like void but darker. I felt that going straight forward was the right thing to do so I did, then what I thought was Matsuri appeared behind me but she was constantly just behind me and I couldn't see her, only a leach which was randomly connected to me and that thing. I asked if it really was Matsuri because it didn't feel like her, she said yes so I continued walking while everything got darker. Then I managed to look behind me and I saw something else that wasn't Matsuri. It was unexplainable, like a walk-in who tried to force itself to become my tulpa by taking away my attention from Matsuri and lying to my face, it said some weird things which I don't remember and maybe that's for the best. I knew it was something else so I asked Matsuri to help me, so she took me to one of our usual places we meditate in.

 

Then after a quick meditation break, we went out again. This time together, she transported us both actually in the middle of meditation so she seemed to really want to do it. We ended up in a Modern Warfare 3 map, Underground I think the map name was. She ran straight trough the map and even tried to clip trough the walls on the other side of the map. I managed to see first person from her view unintentionally. I told her that she has to find another way but she insisted that this wall was the one way she was taking, she then got the idea to make a door there which actually worked.

 

After going in, we ended up in a huge dessert during a sandstorm. I followed her sliding down the sand dunes and all, then we ended up in a dark tunnel. We had military armour and guns and I have no idea what game or film it could've been. We then got killed by something really quickly. Then everything seemed to happen pretty fast. We were on a skyscraper that was falling down. I gripped something and Matsuri held my leg. We pretty much held on till we decided we should just jump because nothing happened. But instead of death, we got millennium falcon saving us and then everything got much quicker. Millennium falcon crashed into a death star, memory a bit fuzzy after that but it ended good.

 

We then sat in front of a TV watching my old memories. She held the remote and she was pretty curious. She found memories I thought I've forgotten completely, good, bad and some traumatizing ones. She did ask me if it was alright and I said it is. It felt like therapy I've never gotten before. She did go pretty rough one time but she understood that and switched to happy ones.

 

She seemed so vocal too, even after but right now while writing this, she seems silent.

 

Hope this was inspirational rather than long and boring. This was a successful day, I suppose. Maybe should focus less on possession for now and more on Matsuri as a whole. Feels like it could be good for making her stronger and more independent. Honestly, I'm just doing what feels best for now.

 

This community has been a great part for this life-changing event. Kudos to everyone for the great motivation! This community is wonderful in so many ways.

[Guest Reilyn-Alley]

Wow, love the story of the adventure! I like the descriptions of the techniques and stuff you guys tried too.

 

You go Matsuri! If you want to go somewhere and there isn't a door, you make one! Woo!

 

EDIT: Glanced into that guide you linked..

 

one can awaken a tulpa's true self; a happier self.

 

So.. I'd be like what, super saiyan happy? Ultra instinct happy? Bwhaha, maybe we could flip this around and do it for hosts that seem out of sorts. I'm up for any bonding exercises, so we will give it a shot with an open mind. Thanks <3

[Guest]

Great adventure! We have those every so often. Mostly our adventures in wonderland are talking and sitting around enjoying each other. Peaceful and uneventful, but still just as good. The ones where we travel to the moon and are attacked by space aliens are also fun and memorable.

[Xarbern]

-Day 16-

Today is a pretty noteworthy day. We manged to freaking 'co-front' if that's a thing at all, not heard it much but I'll call it co-front because we both were in control and felt the same senses.

 

It began with a glass of cola. She seemed very talkative when we were on our way home. She basically commented about the cola bottle we got from the store after school. She seemed to know the taste or something because she really 'liked' it before we even drank some.

 

Anyway. We got home, plopped some ice cubes and some cola in a glass, and then started drinking. Next thing I know is that Matsuri's mindvoice was actually pretty decent, almost like mine. Then it sounded like she was enjoying it and I... we drank it pretty slowly just to feel the taste. It was weird. Now when I think about it, we've probably co-fronted before but I didn't realize that it was actually co-fronting because I expected another type of feeling.

 

I pretty much took it as a thing that won't happen for a long while, like a shooting star. I promised myself to keep a guard up for any similar feelings or something that could potentially be co-fronting. After a while browsing the forums, I got that feeling that she wanted to write something. I wrote whatever I was going to write first and then left space for her. It then was like I was writing but another one thinking what I should write and I just did with no hesitation, except when she gravitated to Swedish, then it felt like I needed to help her find another word or phrase for it.

 

I'm honestly not sure how to precisely describe how it felt but I'm going to try doing my best for anyone who may relate. Here's a list on things happening when she's co-fronting:

 

•Nothing feels different when it comes to senses, I can still feel and use every sense together with Matsuri.

•She's more vocal while 'co-fronting' and I hear her almost as clear as my own mindvoice if not more sometimes (I'm reducing my own mindvoice to hear her more clearly sometimes).

•I start thinking odd things that I'm questioning instantly afterwards.

•I feel like doing things I don't find quite interesting normally. Getting a odd feeling of enjoyment while doing so.

•Expressing myself differently. Like laughing loud at bad jokes or unfunny childish things like poop humor, basically being able to express myself in general.

•Taking my time enjoying things. I usually rush through things because my mindset I have about time.

 

I don't always feel everything at the same time from that list. Some are constant like vocality get clearer while 'co-fronting'.

 

I hope we can hear your thoughts and reflections. Maybe tell us about how it was for you? Should I try letting Matsuri out on the forums? She's not that good at formulating English yet but I'll help her out at the beginning. I heard mixed things about proxing, like it could halt their development and crazy shizz like that. I don't like to believe accidental parroting but most ol' discussions about proxing lead to conclusions like you could accidentally parrot. Not sure how it makes sense but we'll see. I'm sure hearing two voices in there.

[Guest Reilyn-Alley]

Sounds like some awesome growth, great job you two! A lot of that sounds similar to stuff we go through (but you are kind enough to read our ramblings so you know that already). Being out on the boards has been a great experience for me, it really reinforced to me that I was a person and made me stop and think about things, look up new words, grow basically. If Matsuri is shy or doesn't like coming out to talk, that's ok too. We are all different, no pressure! <3

 

It also made Lance more comfortable with trusting me and helped deepen our bond because, well, I haven't gotten us banned or screamed at yet (polite warnings aside) and he is happy (and fascinated) when he cuts me loose on here and I do my thing. If not for all this I don't think we would have even had that whole possession breakthrough so it's led to great stuff and I totally love encouraging all of you and being silly, so yay. :3

[Guest]

Proxying is fine, it's sometimes more comfortable for a tulpa to use tulpish (pure thought exchange). Then you interpret it. We do that half the time. Sometimes i speak tulpish to them to convey a point that I'm too lazy to 'speak using words'. In fact, we tulp a lot nowadays.

[Xarbern]

-Day 17-

Short one. I'm half sleeping when I'm writing this so it may not be topnotch. Since the discovery of fronting, Matsuri has been growing rapidly. She's much more vocal and energetic.

 

•We seem to share the same thoughts that pop up in our head but we may give attention to different thoughts and let the rest slide.

•The more she's actively involved in the "wakey world" (fantastic term), the stronger she gets depending on what she is doing. Her English yesterday was terrible compared to today.

•We seem to feel 'blended' sometimes randomly.