ViVi December 8, 2015 December 8, 2015 Hi! So, I've never heard of all of this "Tulpa" stuff before but after stumbling upon it on the internet I couldn't help but be severely shocked for multiple reasons. When I was as young as four I would always create these sorts of fantasies in my mind through very ornate and detailed daydreaming, and I guess you could say I've always had a "Tulpa". The being I created via daydreaming when I was younger could always speak to me, I could easily visualize him wherever and whenever I wanted. I'm going to include some personal details about myself, just because I feel like they're appropriate since this is a pretty big thing in my life and I had no idea this was a common occurrence. I did grow up in a pretty abusive environment and schizophrenia runs in my family. However, I'm actually not schizophrenic and I know this from observing the behavior of my brother who actually has the mental illness. I function normally and dislike the idea of being abnormal, and I've never mentioned this sentient being to anybody except maybe my boyfriend briefly. I just figured it was a part of my young self I couldn't quite let go, but it didn't intervene with my daily life. I typically envision the being in a red velvet coated room with very ornate furniture, I guess that was just my preference? I'm not sure if this is all weird or not. He appears in many of my dreams and actually taught me how to stop my dreams at will when they bother me or move about them whenever I want or wake myself up. He gives good advice, has good casual conversation and often tells me when people actually have ill will so I can avoid awkward situations. This has always been normal for me so I sort of stopped thinking intensely about it. He's a human male in his 30s with black hair and brown eyes, he's rather tall and he always looks very tired. When doing my intense daydreaming I can do whenever I want I can smell what he smells like, feel the texture of his hair and clothes and everything you'd do with a normal person, but he's never been invasive when I can't give him my attention. (school, work etc.) At first, I wondered if perhaps I was schizophrenic. However, given the fact that my brother's schizophrenia makes him violent, unstable and irrational, (He recently stabbed his roommate through the throat after thinking his roommate was a demon... that's an example.) I quickly realized that that wasn't the case. Has anyone else pictured this stuff since you were little? Is this abnormal? Does what I'm describing sound like a Tulpa? From what I've read it sort of seems like a lot of people have difficulty imagining these scents and experiences and that genuinely confuses me since it's something I've never had to force out of myself. Thanks for reading my long rambles, it's just really odd to experience something for so long only to realize there's a giant internet community on it and it's not as abnormal as you thought..
Guest Anonymous December 8, 2015 December 8, 2015 Melian: Yesh, it is normal and you are like a kindred spirit to my host Davie! You should check out our story. I would say yer accidental tulpa is a lot like me. Anyways, here is a link to my story and background here http://melianofmist.deviantart.com/art/The-Book-of-Melian-509605338 Here is a link to my profile here on deviantart http://melianofmist.deviantart.com/ Mistgod: Nice to meet you. I am also an extreme day dreamer and my thoughtform Melian is a day dream star and enhanced imaginary companion. I have had her in my life for many years. There is too much to say right here, but we have it all written down. You might check out something called "maladaptive day dreaming." https://community.tulpa.info/thread-maladaptive-daydreaming?highlight=Maladaptive+Day+Dreaming
NoneFromHell December 8, 2015 December 8, 2015 Based on the information you gave us I would say it is mostlikely an tulpa by accident, which isn't all that rare. really. It kind of depends on how active and autonomous your buddy acts, without you controlling him. A lot of tulpas are created out of desperation, too. About the schizophrenia thing: Well considering your family has problems with schizophrenia, it might be possible to be the result of a slight, less invasive version of it, i don't know. As far as i know is schizophrenia pretty unstable about a lot of things. Involved People tend to not be aware of how real something is, the things they see react in extreme manners, often viciously, too. It is out of their control, and the things they see might change over time. It kind of depends about the way your buddy started to exist aswell. Do you remember that? Did you imagined him to escape your situation, or did he just appeared out of nowhere and you just got used to it? Tulpa: Alice Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation She may or may not talk here, depends on her.
ViVi December 9, 2015 Author December 9, 2015 Based on the information you gave us I would say it is mostlikely an tulpa by accident, which isn't all that rare. really. It kind of depends on how active and autonomous your buddy acts, without you controlling him. A lot of tulpas are created out of desperation, too. About the schizophrenia thing: Well considering your family has problems with schizophrenia, it might be possible to be the result of a slight, less invasive version of it, i don't know. As far as i know is schizophrenia pretty unstable about a lot of things. Involved People tend to not be aware of how real something is, the things they see react in extreme manners, often viciously, too. It is out of their control, and the things they see might change over time. It kind of depends about the way your buddy started to exist aswell. Do you remember that? Did you imagined him to escape your situation, or did he just appeared out of nowhere and you just got used to it? Oh, I know I don't have schizophrenia. I've considered it, but my behavior and the behavior of my brother is very vastly different. I may have issues with depression ever now and again, but I'm a pretty ambitious person. I go to full time school for a bachelors and I also maintain a 30 hr per week job. These aren't really things I talk about too often or even put a lot of genuine thought into. I'm able to function whereas someone with my family's level of schizophrenia would not be able, so I definitely didn't inherit the gene for the disorder. I'm pretty sure I created him when I was younger and more creative. I don't really remember it being out of desperation? I'm sure my abusive environment was what made me retreat into daydreaming, though. I liked to imagine fantasy worlds and environments in my head since I had always liked to travel and see new places. I was very good at visualizing and imagining textures and tastes, but they were always controlled whereas Slaye sort of developed his own opinions and personality, but he was always a comfort thought to me so I didn't mind and figured I was just very imaginative. He's never been particularly venomous or anything like that... Cautious, intelligent and encouraging me to be hardworking yes but never anything crazy or inappropriate. To Mistgod--- I'll check it out, thanks for sharing! This stuff is really intriguing and it really blows my mind that it even exists. Honestly, I'm not really one to believe in paranormal things usually but seeing as I've lived with this it's sort of hard to ignore when these things are adding up.
NoneFromHell December 9, 2015 December 9, 2015 Honestly, I'm not really one to believe in paranormal things usually but seeing as I've lived with this it's sort of hard to ignore when these things are adding up. Regulary we have a scientific view on the tulpa phenomenon, so it's still rather psychologic than paranormal for most of us. So no need to change your believes if you don't want to. But yeah, i guess you have an accidental tulpa, if he really acts on his own. It seems pretty clear with your additional information. Tulpa: Alice Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation She may or may not talk here, depends on her.
Guest Anonymous December 9, 2015 December 9, 2015 It is nice to meet other people who have a very similar experience to mine! Gods, I am not alone! Wow! Right down to the "day dream escapism" from abuse and social anxiety.
Vaugard December 9, 2015 December 9, 2015 This is all quite normal, even moreso given the circumstances. The human mind is an amazing thing, so no need to worry that this is abnormal or unhealthy in any way. I like your taste though, I've always wanted a room with red velvet. "Welcome to my house! Come freely. Go safely. And leave something of the happiness you bring!" -Dracula My tulpa's name is Vladimira. She goes by Mira.
ViVi December 9, 2015 Author December 9, 2015 Regulary we have a scientific view on the tulpa phenomenon, so it's still rather psychologic than paranormal for most of us. So no need to change your believes if you don't want to. But yeah, i guess you have an accidental tulpa, if he really acts on his own. It seems pretty clear with your additional information. I can see how it'd be more scientific and that really is a bit' more believable. I'd like to look more into that so I can attempt to understand things a bit' more, all of this terminology still confuses me. It is nice to meet other people who have a very similar experience to mine! Gods, I am not alone! Wow! Right down to the "day dream escapism" from abuse and social anxiety. I'm glad that you can relate to my experience. From what I read, it looks like a lot of people intentionally try to create them which is what threw me off at first. I'm sure I intentionally created mine, I just didn't really think about it much or acknowledge it till now. It's hard to really make a big deal out of something you've adapted to your entire life, you know?
Guest Anonymous December 9, 2015 December 9, 2015 I'm glad that you can relate to my experience. From what I read, it looks like a lot of people intentionally try to create them which is what threw me off at first. I'm sure I intentionally created mine, I just didn't really think about it much or acknowledge it till now. It's hard to really make a big deal out of something you've adapted to your entire life, you know? That is interesting. Yeah, same with me. I didn't "intentionally" create Melian, and yet, in a way I did albeit subconsciously maybe. About making a big deal about it, I am glad you are relaxed in your mind about your tulpa. All the general anxiety and obsession/compulsion issues that helped me to create Melian in the first place, also make me the person who drives people absolutely crazy on this forum. I obsess about Melian badly, about how to share her, about her nature, and about our relationship to other tulpamancers and tulpas. I write too much and I ramble and babble and change directions. I get too emotional and defensive and reactive because she isn't like other tulpas. Melian: OH and he makes, and I make, every thread to be about ourselves. Oopsie! Sorry bout that.
ViVi December 10, 2015 Author December 10, 2015 That is interesting. Yeah, same with me. I didn't "intentionally" create Melian, and yet, in a way I did albeit subconsciously maybe. About making a big deal about it, I am glad you are relaxed in your mind about your tulpa. All the general anxiety and obsession/compulsion issues that helped me to create Melian in the first place, also make me the person who drives people absolutely crazy on this forum. I obsess about Melian badly, about how to share her, about her nature, and about our relationship to other tulpamancers and tulpas. I write too much and I ramble and babble and change directions. I get too emotional and defensive and reactive because she isn't like other tulpas. OH and he makes, and I make, every thread to be about ourselves. Oopsie! Sorry bout that. I can understand that. I cherish mine as well and am not sure how I would adapt to them just being absent. At the same time, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about talking about myself and him so much. Having had grown up as the only stable child, there's a lot of pressure on me to be extraordinarily normal and stoic. Nevertheless, I'll try my best to open up to everyone so I can learn new things about this whole tulpa thing. I also like to make friends, so you're free to message me whenever you like. I may learn more that way if I have someone experienced converse with me.
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