Planting a Tulpa Seed and How to Listen to It

[Ayre]

I. Foreword

 

__This guide mainly touches on the initial personality creation step of creating a full tulpa. The later sections fall more onto first contact and how I overcame doubts in regards to communication with my tulpa. Now, It's important to note that this guide comes from and builds upon the idea of a host producing an accidental tulpa from a created character from their own fiction writing, or role-playing character. This established identity isn't the fully formed tulpa, but the basis of were the real tulpa comes from. With this method, personality forcing is the foundation for a tulpa to grow into a full separate consciousness. The stronger the personality forcing, the stronger foundation. Know that others have reported successes without any personality forcing, but these people have used other methods entirely. I would like to encourage you to find the process that best suits you. I would recommend my guide to anyone that is better with words than they are with visual representation. This approach favors writing out and listing things over closing one's eyes and visualizing.

 

II. Personality

 

noun per·son·al·i·ty |pər-sə-ˈna-lə-tē

1. Psychology

____a.the sum total of the physical, mental, emotional, and social characteristics of an individual.

____b.the organized pattern of behavioral characteristics of the individual.

2. the quality of being a person; existence as a self-conscious human being; personal identity.

 

__Given this definition, personality is probably the most important step in the creation process, because essentially the personality is your tulpa. Just like you, a tulpa will have their own personal identity. All you are doing here is planting a seed and nourishing it. You may not be able to control how many flowers are bloomed, or how big the apples are, but you have the choice of planting a tulip seed or an apple seed. This is where deviations come into play (for more on this refer to Section III-A-ii near the end of this guide). Essentially, you don't have control of the end product, but you can help steer it in a positive direction. With time, this starting personality will evolve into much more, but for now all we can do is create the seed and pour our love and attention into it so that it will grow into something amazing.

 

__It's probably a good idea to give your tulpa the best head-start that you can by being as thorough as possible when creating a foundational personality, or a tulpa seed. In fiction writing, without a well-developed personality a character is flat and uninspired. In fiction, round characters tend to be more fully developed and described than flat, or static, characters. If you think of the characters you most love in fiction, they probably seem as real to you as people you know in real life. Now, obviously a tulpa is not just a character in a script, they seem to have a mind of their own, so you should strive for a round tulpa seed and not a flat one.

 

__A. Internal Personality

 

__Start off by brainstorming basic personality traits by either writing them out on a sheet of paper, or typing them out on a word document. Here is a very simple video on personality traits to give you some ideas, and a big list of personality traits. Something to consider is the overall mood of your tulpa seed. Many people have default states that they always seem to jump back into. I’m sure you know some people that always seem to find something to be mad about, or the perpetual victims, or the really happy, cup-is-half-full people. What is your tulpa’s default mood? This will affect their world views and personal philosophies. Some examples that I can think of include: cheery/sad, logical/emotional, determined/lazy, outgoing/shy, formal/laidback, patient/impatient.

is a good video on this (in terms of fiction writing) by Cy Porter.

 

____i. Intentions and Motivations

 

__The next thing to consider is your tulpa seed’s intentions, and motivations. Write out the answers to the following questions. Why do they do what they do? What do they strive for and/or want? Maybe they always want to do the right thing. Maybe they want people to think that they are smart/insightful. They could just want to have a good time and relax. Perhaps they want to make people laugh. They could just want to be accepted, or fit in. Maybe something selfish or even sinister. Who knows? It’s up to you to figure this out.

 

____ii. Persona

 

__This next step takes your tulpa seed to a new level, and makes it even more realistic. The answer to this question will probably take time, but it is worth considering in detail. How do they intentionally present themselves, and how would you expect others to view them versus how they want to be viewed? Everyone has a social mask or persona that they intentionally present to others. It doesn’t have to be a drastic difference from how they really are (they don’t have to be a sociopath), but it’s an important consideration to make.

is another video from Cy Porter on this subject.

 

____iii. Flaws

 

__This step in personality development may be a difficult one to create, if you choose to include it. Creating flaws is not necessarily essential, but worth considering. Everyone has flaws, whether they admit it or not. This is what makes people real and relatable. I don’t have a ton on this, but consider creating some character flaws in your tulpa seed. These don’t have to be huge, but they might make them seem more realistic and relateable off the bat. They can vary from being a little self-centered or inconsiderate to hating puppies. Try to think of a few and write these down, and make sure these traits are things that you can live with. After all, you will be around this person constantly and for a long time to come, so use your best judgment.

 

__B. External Personality

 

____i. Physical Form

 

__Now that the internal part of your tulpa seed’s personality has been solidified, you should consider the physical expressions of its personality. Try to answer this simple question in as much detail as you can: What would people notice first about your tulpa if they could see them? Write a list of everything you can think of. Think of their species, their build, height, weight, complexion, Hair style/color, etc. What style of clothes do they prefer to wear? Formal, casual, all black or pink, maybe even extravagant like Lady Gaga or Gene Simmons, or possibly none at all. How do they walk or stand? Maybe they walk tall/stand straight, slumped over, they could have a limp, or walk bow legged. Your imagination is the limit.

 

____ii. Voice

 

__So you know what your tulpa seed acts like and looks like, but how do they sound? Voice is an important part of anyone’s personality. How does their voice sound exactly? Think of the pitch, timbre, inflection, and volume. If you need help deciding feel free to take ideas from television, radio, or even real life. If your tulpa has an accent that is foreign for you, youtube has plenty of guides for knowing how other cultures speak. This link may help you if you decide to go down this path. It’s also important to think about how much they talk. Are they talkative, or do they only speak when they feel that they need to. Also, think of the word choice they would likely make. A tulpa that is very proper and desires to seem intelligent would most likely not cuss like a sailor or make racial slurs. Just use common sense here, and it should come fairly easily.

 

III. Interaction

 

__After you have figured out the previous information about your tulpa you are finally ready for the fun part, interacting with them. Have you have ever planned out a conversation, or argument in your head with someone that you know very well? Then you have already had a very similar experience to having a tulpa. Where does the other person’s words come from? Well, from you, but not exactly. You know this person and their personality. The words will likely be how you imagine they would react to something that is going on, or something that you have said. You know them so well that you don’t have to think about what to make them say, they just talk. Tulpas interact with their host in much the same way. After you know your tulpa’s basic personality, temperament, and overall character traits, everything else becomes easier. Once you have this down, the next part should be somewhat simple. Although, this is what trips most people up the most.

 

__A. Contact

 

__How do you talk to them? How do you know it’s really them? Over time I have learned what it's like when she talks, but this is abstract and makes sense only to her and me, eventually you will find what works through trial and error. However, the following may help you in the early stages if you don't mind walking off the beaten path for a bit.

 

__You should know your tulpa's starting personality exceptionally well at this point. When attempting to get a response think about what has been said and if it fits into what you already know about your tulpa seed. If it fits, then there is a high likelihood that it is your tulpa, but even so it might be a good idea to ask for clarification at first to be sure. If the response does not fit, then ask for clarification to be sure. Always be mindful of deviations. In essence, you should treat your tulpa like you would treat anyone in life that you are having a hard time understanding. Shaking your head yes constantly will get you nowhere, and just saying "what" over and over could get tiresome. Guessing what they have said based on context and what you know about them, then checking to see if you understood them correctly would be a good middle ground. Essentially, you are sensing the intent of your tulpa and the personality that you have been cultivating, not forcing them to respond to you or just ignoring them. You are talking to your tulpa and waiting for a response, and checking at first to see if you got it right.

 

__How do you check this? Head pressures seemed to work well for us. These feel almost like non-painful headaches, or a strange compression inside your head. You can ask them to send this signal if you understood them correctly, we even got to the point of her sending them to different parts of the head for yes and no answers. At first, It does take some time and concentration to feel these, but you should know it when it does happen. Others have used transferred emotions/feelings, or even imagined pictures to communicate outside of mind voice, or simple thoughts. You'll find what works best for you eventually.

 

____i. Individuality

 

__This method assumes that because you already have an idea of the character (or personal identity) of your tulpa, that you will be able to sense and infer what they are trying to say. This will start out feeling just like having that imaginary conversation I described in the introduction to this section (III. Interaction), only with the ability to stop and check if you understood. Eventually this form of communication becomes easier and clearer the less you worry about parroting or puppeting. Please keep in mind that what I have mentioned here is not a very commonly held practice in this community at this time, and many hosts seek out other means of early communications. This is just one path you have to choose from, and what ended up working for me in the end. In my personal experience, the only reason I could not talk to my tulpa sooner was because I was too worried, and blocked out everything that I thought might have been me. My tulpa was able to talk from pretty early on, I was just too naive to simply relax and listen.

 

____ii. Deviations

 

__Deviations do happen to most tulpas to some extent; I’ve had a complete 180 on how I thought my tulpa looked, and even a change in her gender. You might ask yourself, why put all of this effort and time into personality forcing if they might just decide to change parts of it later on? Personality forcing is also about feeding your tulpa with as much attention as possible. Tulpas thrive off of attention, and grow stronger the more you give them, and the more you interact with them. These thoughts are not wasted if deviations happen, it's just part of the long and complex journey of tulpa creation. All of your twists and turns along the way accumulate into the vibrant and unique life-form that we know as a tulpa, and bring you two closer together. Just be flexible and prepared for change.

 

____iii. Doubts

 

__These are inevitable, and important to face head on. I have given you some ways that I have rationalized and dealt with my doubts. I've realized that doubts about what a tulpa is, or if I really could hear mine, are pointless in the end. They separate a tulpa and host, and that is the opposite of what we are all trying to accomplish. I take the road of just enjoying the time that I have with my tulpa, and knowing that not everything in life is knowable; I chalk this up as one of the unanswerable aspects of life. This reasoning may not work for you, and that is understandable. It wouldn't have worked for me at first, I let doubts cripple my connection with my tulpa, and through that I have gained my own perspective on it. You will have doubts, it will not be easy to overcome them. New doubts will rise and you will have to work on them, too. This is the cycle that tends to happen. In the end, I think this is what separates a successful host/tulpa relationship and the ones who walk away forever; learning to keep going even through uncertainty.

 

IV. Closing

 

__I would like to say that you should not take anything too seriously in life, even tulpa creation. Have fun with this, and follow what you think is right. Find your own path, your own method, and enjoy the process as much as you enjoy the end product. And please do not use a tulpa as a replacement for a social life, friends, or lovers. A tulpa is a tulpa, not like anything or anyone else you’ve experienced. They are their own special beings that are always there for you. They can help you through your worst problems and share your greatest joys. Hell, maybe I’m just bat-shit crazy, maybe we all are. All I know for sure is that I wouldn’t trade my tulpa for the world. So if you are new to creating a tulpa, hang in there. It will get easier, maybe even a little too easy. You’ll get there, you both will.

[Guest Anonymous]

Groovy, don't let anyone tell you what you do or do not have. You're just as valid as any other tulpa.

 

I gotta leave for a while. We are getting the Mistgod-Melian crazies again. We need a lot of time to calm down and sort it out. Ayre, you keep writing wonderful stuff on the forum my friend. I do like the guide a lot. Thanks AGGuy for the PM that knocked my head.

---

Thanks mods for deleting my useless stuff on this thread.

[J.Iscariot]

"J.Iscariot, I cannot write a guide that works for everyone. I'm writing about what I know, and what I have seen. If I tried to write about a method that I have not done, or had experience with it would help no one. If this guide does not work for someone, then there is nothing I can do about that. Other methods did not work for me, it wasn't the guide's fault. Also, I never meant to imply that tulpas should not be considered people. My views on what I think they are, is a point for another thread. "

 

That, I understand. Even then, if we had to bring together the people who parroted and it worked out for them just fine, we'd go towards other communities and types of thoughtforms (soulbonding systems headmates etc etc), which is fine if we want to widen the spectrum of the tulpa phenomenon online, but that's not up to me. With that being said, thing is that you write a guide, and a beginner reads it. If they try it out and it doesn't work, with your guide being the only thing related to parroting aside from Fede's method (the thread itself isn't bumped, I talked to Fede a few times, he's a smart guy but not in tulpamancy), you're kind of responsible for them losing out on a while of efforts. Not trying to play any guilt cards here, of course, but if parroting doesn't work and your method is the only thing put 'in motion', then that poses a problem. There is a very large success rate for FAQ and Irish_ methods, I know people who tried out parroting and ended up abandoning (and I found even worse displays of tulpamancy that I won't discuss because censor censor drama), it's just not a very accepted technique. I didn't write my post with the thought 'oh i am going to show them how good of a tulpamancer i am, yay all against parroting', if people want to parrot that's their own thing really, they can do what they want, but with what I said regarding the success rate, and the difficulties one would face in identifying whether it truly is their tulpa or just them fooling themselves (and there have been such cases due to parroting, my bias against it comes from the fact that I know it's not my tulpa and that in my own case it would be self-deception, people have serious, serious issues with doubt in this community), it would be and excuse the term shitty overall if it really came into motion, not for me or for the sake of me being a good tulpamancer or coming off as an elitist.

 

Tell me, out of curiosity, why should I follow your guide and not FAQ's guide or any other guide? Of course this isn't related to anything on-topic, it's just something intriguing to me, because the other methods look more promising. To any outsider, your guide could come off as straight up self-deception with due respect, I apologize if I came off as a dick, that's an issue I'm trying to work on.

[Ayre]

J.Iscariot, I'll PM you and we can talk there.

 

This guide is supposed to just be about personality how I got over thinking that I was parroting and my own doubts, not necessarily the full creation of a tulpa. It's supplemental, and that's all I wanted it to be. I might state this explicitly at the start of the guide.

[J.Iscariot]

Sure thing

 

I'm not GAT or anything so in the end the approval of your guide relies on their general vote or something if I got this correctly, what I posted was just my own opinion over stuff. Excuse me if I don't reply to your PM today because I'm pretty busy and stuff

[Sands]

I see nothing that's really wrong with this method, you do make a note that personality isn't necessary even if it's the most important step in your eyes, so that's pretty much the biggest issue out of the way. This is for those who do want to focus on personality. I am a bit worried about all the off-site links that have some useful information, but I don't think we can really ask you to go and write something about them yourself as it's an entirely different beast to go writing about what makes a good character compared to like, some tulpa-making guide.

 

The part about parroting confuses me slightly. I read that what you do here is parroting and puppeting, but you say that it isn't that in your guide. Is this you trying to tell people that parroting isn't parroting so they stop worrying about it, or did I miss something? While it can be a good idea to try to fool others into thinking one way so they don't doubt all that much, I suggest against it as it all falls apart when they do question it.

 

I guess you're saying "don't worry about it", but you might want to be a bit more clear about it. This is a parroting guide as far as I know, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's a method. But I think you shouldn't try to hide it.

 

Brings me to the last point in the contact section about parroting and such: saying everything is your tulpa. This is probably one of the biggest tulpa-killers, because it creates a doubt spiral after they stop blindly believing and start questioning everything. By then the "proof" they require is so much that it's impossible to get, so it's extremely hard to recover. I know, for many of us, it's as simple as accepting that something might not be us and then in the end we feel so stupid that we ever doubted those things that clearly weren't us. But for newcomers, this isn't the best idea. It really is a journey and by trying to skip right to the end, you lose the foundation that was required to realize what you should believe in.

 

 

Kind of off-topic but I want to make a note about the flaws too! When it comes to your guide, I don't think the flaw section is bad: it makes a note of how it's not necessary to intentionally create them and everyone has them whether they want them or not. But I'll say that a well-rounded character has flaws, yes. A character that is flawless is boring and unrealistic. But a well-rounded person is probably someone who tries to get over their major flaws, because there is no person who doesn't have any flaws.

 

Should go without saying that there is no tulpa who is flawless.

[Ayre]

You do make a note that personality isn't necessary even if it's the most important step in your eyes, so that's pretty much the biggest issue out of the way.

 

To me it is the most important, but I did want people to know that others in this community may not think that way. I guess the point of saying it was to inform new people of the other side of thinking as well as reiterating the subjectivity of my guide and guides in general. (EDIT: I rewrote most of the foreword to better reflect this.)

 

I am a bit worried about all the off-site links that have some useful information, but I don't think we can really ask you to go and write something about them yourself as it's an entirely different beast to go writing about what makes a good character compared to like, some tulpa-making guide.

 

My rational here is that the early stages of creating another consciousness starts, in essence, with just making a fictional character. It then forms more depth and automation on its own until it finally becomes a true tulpa. This rational comes from the side of writers and role players that end up forming a tulpa by accident. (EDIT: I have now stated this more clearly and expand upon it throughout the guide.)

 

The part about parroting confuses me slightly. I read that what you do here is parroting and puppeting, but you say that it isn't that in your guide.

 

Well, this is something that I've had a hard time communicating throughout my drafts. I'll attempt it here. See, you are not actively and forcefully controlling what your tulpa says, which is the difference (to me) of parroting and not parroting. You are sensing the intent of your tulpa and the personality that you have been cultivating. You are talking to your tulpa and waiting for a response. But, I'm attempting to take this a step deeper and trying to explain what I think is happening when the tulpa responds (in the early stages) if you have done extensive personality forcing (which I did in my tulpa's creation). When a new tulpa responds, all it knows (and all you know about it) is the identity you have given it. I think that if new people understand this early on that it may help in actually hearing the tulpa when it does speak (and not just writing it off as I did for months) at the start. I think that when you begin, your preconceived notions about your tulpa is your tulpa. And that is how you begin to actually understand who and what you have created. (EDIT: I have now included this explanation into the guide.)

 

aying everything is your tulpa. This is probably one of the biggest tulpa-killers, because it creates a doubt spiral after they stop blindly believing and start questioning everything.

 

Is there anything further reading on this, or examples that you can link me? I would love to read more on this understanding as this seemed to be conventional knowledge, for the most part, when I was a part of the community about a year ago. Things may have changed, and conventions may have changed. I would love to bridge this gap if i can.

 

It really is a journey and by trying to skip right to the end, you lose the foundation that was required to realize what you should believe in.

 

I guess I am trying to impart the knowledge that I have gained from my own experiences, and trying to help new people avoid the pitfalls I have fallen into. Maybe those pitfalls are part of the learning experience, but I see no real harm in telling people what has worked for me. I don't think that simply reading this will let people skip to the end, but maybe they will consider what my own experiences has taught me.

 

Kind of off-topic but I want to make a note about the flaws too! When it comes to your guide, I don't think the flaw section is bad: it makes a note of how it's not necessary to intentionally create them and everyone has them whether they want them or not. But I'll say that a well-rounded character has flaws, yes. A character that is flawless is boring and unrealistic. But a well-rounded person is probably someone who tries to get over their major flaws, because there is no person who doesn't have any flaws.

 

Should go without saying that there is no tulpa who is flawless.

 

This falls back to what I said earlier that a tulpa in the very early stages is essentially a character that the host had created. It's up to the host and the tulpa to make this character a real person.

[Sands]

I think I liked the first introduction better (or well, the last one at least, I think you have made many changes!), but I think I'll have to give this one some time. I don't think you are really addressing any doubt problems though, because "just believe!" is not a proper response to doubt problems.

 

About the doubt and why "just believe" ended up being the thing people told others is pretty simple. In the beginning we had those crazy hour counts and you just could not have a tulpa before 100 hours had passed or something, and the first time they spoke would be totally alien and in an imposed voice. That's not the case, as we know now. But the people back in the day made their tulpas work really hard to be noticed, and some never did even if they probably had a vocal tulpa at that time. So, with more knowledge, these older hosts felt pretty stupid. If only I had believed earlier, you know?

 

So that's what they told people. Just believe, that's what got us here in the end. But every thought that comes into your head is not a tulpa, and some people need more time trying to figure out where the line between tulpa and not tulpa goes. This creates a lot of confusion and questions, and when there's nothing to fall back on because everything they built their foundation of a tulpa on was built on blind belief alone. All it takes is a mind that prefers proof before it believes or a person who feels cheated because the whole tulpa thing now feels like a delusion and everyone else just "believes" everything is a tulpa when it probably isn't.

 

I did write about a mindset here that touches up on why blind belief isn't the best way to go in maybe more detail? Thing is, this is one of the more common tulpa problems I run into, and the success rate of getting over the doubt spiral is very low compared to those who just give up because it just doesn't feel the same anymore.

 

 

Re: flaws: I know that you are kind of going for the "build a character" angle and that's fine, I guess. But if you take it to the end, you're stuck with a person with flaws anyway!

[waffles]

I think you've addressed all the issues I had with this. With what Sands said about the doubt; maybe. I'm not sure that what's written says, "Believe everything," but maybe it's ambiguous. I don't feel strongly about it. I guess you can follow Sands' advice about it. In the meantime I'll approve.

[Sock]

# The Contact and Interaction sections seem to butt heads from my view. In the Interaction section, there's an implication that the host is still making up responses consciously to a degree, based on how the figure is programmed and the expectations of the host. Contact then says that the host isn't making things up for the tulpa to say based on the figures programming and the host's expectations. Is it that between Interaction and Contact, the host stopped assuming responses? Or is it that because the figure is so defined and detailed, the responses they give are in-line with the host's expectations, even though the host isn't actually trying to think stuff for them?

 

# I think the issue here is that the guide is very focused on trying to mitigate unconscious puppeting fears. Reading to the Contact section makes it very clear why the proceeding steps concerning definition are so incredibly detailed: it's a fail safe. While I do think a proper viewpoint about things can help mitigate them, ultimately overcoming fears of unconscious puppeting is something the host will have to do on their own to some degree. The trouble with focussing too much on an idea to take away parroting fears is that the fears will try to shake even that. After all, some people will doubt if they even exist, or are even breathing, no idea is invincible against strong enough doubt. What's needed in this case is to develop enough mental strength to either wrestle off, ignore, or discredit the doubts, even doubting the doubts themselves may be necessary. So the host taking time to strengthen their own will power may be necessary for them to go forward, while developing their tulpa in tandem.

 

# I wrote a little something about my own mindset here. It's not quite as detailed and full-bodied as Sands', but it may be useful for you.

 

I feel you have something solid up to the Interaction and Contact sections. The previous steps look to me as a nice, solid way to build a foundation for a tulpa to be made with. It's just that the interaction bits need to be cleaned up and clarified. I'll be keeping my eye out.

 

Peace

[Ayre]

Changes in this draft (most likely the final draft):

 

1. "A. Contact" has been edited quite extensively. After thinking about it, I have actually changed my mind on this point. It does happen sometimes. Assuming you know everything about a new tulpa could hinder any deviations it is attempting to show. This was a fault that needed to be changed.

 

2. Added a section at the end about doubts.