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It’s the weekend, and I’m continuing my ongoing quest to explore the rich culture of Germany. I have a one hour train ride ahead of me. I've got my music and a book to read but what the hell, let's see if there’s actually anything to what I’ve read so much about. I’m going to create my wonderland.

The train rumbling through the rural countryside all but drowns out the quiet conversations and makes for a non-distracting background. I get into a comfortable position and close my eyes, imagining myself flying through a white void. I arrive at a simple one room log cabin and step through the door, shaking myself off as if coming in from the cold. I focus on my new surroundings.

 

It looks just how I've been imagining it over the past few days. To my left is a wall with a window with its shades drawn and a white refrigerator in the near corner. The wall to my right is bare save for a window with shades drawn, like its twin on the opposite wall. In front of me sit two leather chairs on a brown circular rug facing a stone fireplace.

I go clockwise around the room, looking closely at every object and surface and focus on the minute details. I run my hands over everything, trying to get as accurate a picture of my wonderland as possible. Some of the objects feel like things from my past, such as the chairs feeling just like my grandfather's old thinking chair, and the fireplace feeling like the one in the home I grew up in. I point at the fireplace and snap my fingers, and a fire roars to life. I decide the crackling fire will be distracting, so I pour a bucket of water on it, extinguishing it with a sputtering hiss.

 

Suddenly, distracting thoughts pop into my head. I need to concentrate, so I imagine physically dragging the thoughts out of my head, and find it's very effective at clearing my mind. I look down at the floor and am surprised to see what looks like a crumpled bed sheet at my feet. It's covered by a disjointed shifting image, as if the distracting thought had been projected onto a cloth screen and somebody had crumpled it up while somehow keeping the projected image intact. Well I can't have this cluttering up my wonderland; I need a way to get rid of it. I briefly consider sweeping it under the rug, but decide against it after imagining the consequences of distractions building up under my feet. I will a stainless steel trash can into existence next to my refrigerator and sweep the crumpled thought neatly into it. I continue to build the world around me.

 

Eventually, I'm flooded with another wave of distracting thoughts, these mostly about work. I drag the thoughts out onto the floor like before, except this time one of my co-workers is standing among the crumpled thoughts, staring blankly at me. An interaction with her at work had been one of the thoughts that sneaked into my head.

"You don't belong in here; I need you need to leave," I tell her firmly. She replies with more staring. I walk past her to the door and open it for her, gesturing to the white void beyond. I turn away and hear her footsteps as she leaves.

 

I close the door behind her after she leaves and face the room, and see the fireplace is lit again. More than that, the fire is more intense this time, filling the rough stone enclosure completely. I snap my fingers at it and imagine it being extinguished. If anything, the fire looks bigger. Confused, I repeat the process a few more times.

*SNAP SNAP SNAP*

The flames have definitely breached the fireplace now, spreading up the wall and along the floor threatening to reach the rug. I throw a bucket of water onto it fruitlessly and back up towards the door. The flames are now lapping at the ceiling and side walls. By the time my back hits the door, more than half the room has disappeared in the inferno.

 

Without warning, the blaze intensifies tenfold in the blink of an eye and completely consumes me. I can't even see my own arms through the raging orange glow as I raise them to shield myself, and say the only rational thing that comes to mind.

 

HOLY SHIIIIIIIIT!!!

 

I wheel around frantically, practically clawing at the door searching blindly for the doorknob. My scrambling fingers find their target, and I fling open the door with enough ferocity to rip it from its hinges.

 

My eyes snap open. My heart is pounding as I look quickly around at my surroundings. I'm still on the train. The conversations are still going. The train is still rumbling across the German countryside. One thing is different, though. The train has been steadily turning towards the midmorning sun, which is now spilling through the window and directly into my face.

 

The inferno ignited by the real-world sun didn’t even feel warm, let alone painful. It was, thankfully, a purely visual effect. I was still shaking for some time after I left the train, and not only from the violent destruction of my wonderland. Up until now I’ve regarded the concepts discussed here with open minded skepticism. I didn’t dismiss the ideas, but I wasn’t ready to outright accept them as truth either. I now have proof that what I’ve discovered is not only possible, but something I can do.

 

In short, I became a believer today. And all it took was creating and accidently destroying my wonderland over a train ride.

Hahahaha I never understood how people don't have control of their own minds but that's one wacky wonderland.

Scarlet - anime, 8/15/2012

Hahahaha I never understood how people don't have control of their own minds but that's one wacky wonderland.

 

Surely things happen in your dreams that you aren't in control of. I think this just indicates that he's visualizing in a somewhat dreamlike state. Happens to me sometimes.

Lyra: human female, ~17

Evan: boy, ~14, was an Eevee

Anera: anime-style girl, ~12; Lyra made her

My blog :: Time expectations are bad (forcing time targets are good though)

 

Surely things happen in your dreams that you aren't in control of. I think this just indicates that he's visualizing in a somewhat dreamlike state. Happens to me sometimes.

 

Yes, I'm positive I slipped into a lucid dream at some point. Changes in lighting and some sounds I hear when I'm dreaming (like my cellphone, alarm clock, etc.) sometimes manifest in my dream.

I think it was just intrusive thoughts. You can't try to deal with intrusive thoughts like that, if you focus on them they will just get worse. I think that's what happened with the fire, and why they kept popping up over and over.

Tulpa's name: April

Form: Human female

Working on: Stuff

My Progress Log

 

"A belief is not merely an idea the mind possesses; it is an idea that possesses the mind." ~ Robert Oxton Bolton

I'm not gonna lie, that's pretty intense. I'm with Frosty on this one, focusing on the fire like that just gave it the attention it needed to grow. Then again, if it was the sun intruding, there can't be anything done about that.

An abstract, all-encompassing love is still a love, nonetheless.

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