Ringgggg's somewhat-comprehensive foxgirl imposition log

[ringgggg]

Alright, things are starting to pick up here! I'm seeing things, brah.

 

I did what I like to call an imposition marathon the other day; that’s a circuit involving 30 minutes of imposition and 10 minutes break time in between, during which I meditate, use the bathroom, or surf the web. I ran through around three of those until, unexpectedly, the visual noise started to group up around where A3’s boundaries were, and I could breifly catch a glimpse of her form in the real world.

 

Expectedly, she was still completely transparent, but the "boundaries" of where her form ended were pronounced with a visual noise similar to a what a video recorded in the dark with an old iPhone would look like. Very faint grains of RGB color and gray noise wrapping around the form in the specific area I was forcing in. My heart was pounding out of my chest, and I doubted if this was even possible (even this far in, lol). Within the short amount of time that it was there before it disappeared, I checked from multiple perspectives ever-so-slightly to make sure it wasn’t some kind of mix-up. Lo and behold, when I went to see, they held. That’s enough confirmation for me to know that this shit works. 

 

My next goal would have to be to try and have the sensation come back stronger and more vivid, but I know that trying to replicate it in its entirety can prove to be a lost cause, since it’s out of my control. I suppose trying to frequent the things I did in that marathon, like closed-eye imposition and meditation, could prove to be at least a catalyst to better results. Obviously, this sensation was just a one-time thing. I didn’t encounter it in yesterday’s session, and I doubt that it’ll become a regular occurrence until I practice a lot more. We’ll get there when we get there.

 

I’ve also noticed that A3 seems to be talking more and feeling more separate than when we first started, which is also pretty good proof that what I’m doing counts as active forcing, as hypothesized by giants like Purlox before. It's cool to see.

 

Onward ho!

[Reisen]

Sounds good, probably! It's hard to be fully "Yep this is all 100% a good thing" with inducing hallucinations lol, but more practice for more results is generally how it should go. And of course imposition counts as forcing! Imposing is 50% of our activity, the other half being switching.

[ringgggg]

3 minutes ago, Reisen said:

Sounds good, probably! It's hard to be fully "Yep this is all 100% a good thing" with inducing hallucinations lol, but more practice for more results is generally how it should go.

You can never tell how much second guessing is necessary. Practice practice practice

 

Going on a trip in Feb, so I hope I can finish up with at least vis imp before then

[ringgggg]

A3 chilling on my bed whilst I meticulously clean my room

[ringgggg]

Things are steadily easing up for me

 

I think it was Bre who mentioned in her progress report that lines are the easiest things to impose, purple is the easiest color to impose, and low light is optimal for practicing visual imposition.

 

On 11/2/2018 at 10:01 AM, Breloomancer said:

I've also learned that some shapes, colors, and ways of movement are easier to impose than others. Violet and indego are the easiest colors, skinny things like snakes are the easiest shapes, and things that are moving quickly and that don't have much movement to or away from my vision are the easiest to impose.

 

Taking all this into account, I've been able to impose things under these circumstances, albeit veery slightly. The best I could manage is a small, purplish-green line in between my fingers. Sometimes I do multiple with more fingers and can stretch them against each other like two rubber bands.

 

I tried my best to edit a visual of what that looks like: 

Spoiler

 

Like I said, this feels a lot like lifting weights in your mind. Only a small range of visuals can be easily maintained before practice, like a weight the average person can lift with no problem. By consistently practicing, studying what's optimal, and sticking to the process, you'll be sure to hit threshold after threshold week after week. Fully functional visual imposition is a threshold that can best be represented by a 225 or 315-pound barbell. Absolutely no chance of being able to bench that weight at the start, and will only give way to you after a good couple months to a year of commitment.

 

I can only put so much concentration into imposition before things start to lose cohesion. Bringing myself to the mental limit over and over is what will push the needle forward, and I'll start to see more and more with less effort.

 

In other news, I've been trying to break free from my socials and spend more time with A3. I haven't spoken publicly about my relationship with her that much on here because we're real tight-knit about stuff. However, I feel like this subject in particular is one that's important enough to be shared on here

 

A3's been describing to me how she's going through a revelation, how she's becoming an "evolved" version of herself and divulging from what she was in the past. Thus, I'm trying my best to help facilitate that by finding ways for me to be a better friend. For me, that starts with making more promises I can keep, as well as trying to stop talking about myself and my own issues. It helps to keep the conversations we have down to earth. Typing up this PR makes that really tempting, though, lol

 

That's about as much as I'm willing to disclose. Hopefully I can say a lot more about things in the future.

Edited September 5, 2023 by ringgggg

[ringgggg]

It’s been a total of two months since I seriously started, so it’s probably best for me to share my current situation before it all goes untracked.

 

General attention to practice has declined in the past few weeks (probably around the 8th up to yesterday), and for a time it looked like I was gonna break down, but we’re back again. School is hard man, but accepting my situation helps to keep the funk down. I'm rolling with it.

 

You know what barber shops and visual imposition have in common? You go to get the thing done, but there’s a lot of potential for talking to happen in between. It made every session lively and easy to look forward to, and it definitely benefited the quality of passive imposition throughout the day. That used to be every session, but now most sessions we go without speaking a word. Maybe I’m all out of conversation juice after barely forcing or talking for almost two weeks.

 

I have hope we can bounce back, but it’s only been a day since my last proper imposition session. It may take a while to get back to where we were. I’m never backing down, and I’m never giving up.

 

As for visuals, things have been the same for the most part since my last report, but I can’t really put that in a negative light because of how unpredictable imposition is. It could also very well be a result of a decline in the quality of the average session due to the reasons above. Being conscious in the actions I’m taking to further development makes me more constructive on myself. It helps to set properly-guided intentions regardless of if they’re ever done or not. As I like to think of it, It’s the thought that counts.

 

Imposing feels different than what it felt like last 21st. Maybe that’s trace of something. 

 

Hair update: A3 has gone back to the OG hair tufts instead of a whole ponytail because she felt it resonated with her better and that the ponytail threw off her vibe when she had it. People feel so different to talk to after they get their hair cut. Hair is weird like that. 

 

I digress. I can’t really say anything further because of the fact that I’m bald and therefore I can’t relate

 

Here's some doodle art

Spoiler

 

Edited September 20, 2023 by ringgggg

[ringgggg]

You ever see those videos of people not putting their retainer on for two weeks and the teeth move back out of alignment so it hurts the next time they put it on? That's me.

 

Visual clarity was preserved, thank goodness, but what I'm calling Box (closed-eye) imposition* quality had deteriorated quite a bit. I suspect it's because knowing the precise shape and dimensions of the form is attributed to memory, while visuals work a different process independent from having to remember things.

 

Oh yeah, we're talking again! Granted, it's only been a single day, but recent life happenings made for pretty good conversation. I just needed a kicker to get the habit back up and running.

 

I didn't intend for this thread to go in such a general direction. It is what it is, I guess. I'm mostly a shuttered person when it comes to talking about personal stuff between the two of us, but when it needs to get out there it will. I'll keep it updated.

 

*Consult the quote below for the explanation to my terminology, from the Aug 22 entry↓

Spoiler

On 8/22/2023 at 1:09 PM, ringgggg said:

I tried imposing in zero light while being aided by tactile imposition. There's a pitfall I had to avoid when doing that, one that I missed in my first few moments practicing. Because of the noticeable lack of visuals, I instantly turned to visualizing A3 in the mind's eye by pure force of habit; basically turning to visualization instead of projecting her onto a 3D plane.

 

After I realized my mistake, I brought in the tactile imposition (which, mind you, I have only a small amount of experience with) to better get a sense of what part of the form I'm working on. Let me tell you, it was pretty impossible to go back from there. It feels like you're feeling around in the dark for something; you gradually get a sense of where things are through the foundation that touch provides. If you touch a box in the dark, you gain a sense of where each edge is, how wide the faces are, and the texture of the corrugated cardboard. With this info, you know exactly where to place your hands in order to pick it up!

 

Edited September 21, 2023 by ringgggg

[ringgggg]

On 9/21/2023 at 1:00 PM, Miri said:

I miss the promise of 'create a tulpa and you'll be able to do all this cool things like hallucinating on command, lucid dream while your body lives on its own AND solve multiple math problems at the same time'. Too bad

 

(referring to imposition, wonderland-switching and parallel processing)

 

Yes I know imposition is possible and that it has nothing to do with having a tulpa. Try out new things and go beyond 'having a mental companion who sometimes takes control of the body' -because that feels like what every system does nowadays, myself included so I'm not one to talk- maybe document it like you're already doing in your imposition PR

 

On 9/21/2023 at 2:17 PM, ringgggg said:

On 9/21/2023 at 1:45 PM, Miri said:

Let them come to tulpamancy, have them find it on their own and decide if they want to get into it. Don't ''preach'' it to people who most certainly don't care, unless you're like super sure they're going to be receptive of it. It weirds people out if they're not used with those things, I've tried telling people about it and it only makes things uncomfortable even when you get 'wow, cool' reactions

Whoa, that wasn’t what I was implying at all! I was talking about improving the quality of the current community, not trying to indoctrinate new people or researchers into it (though the latter would be nice). There isn’t a problem with everyone right now, but the community could use some leverage toward the common initiative of trying something new

 

On 9/21/2023 at 2:38 PM, ringgggg said:

On 9/21/2023 at 2:23 PM, Miri said:

Yeah, agreed. Maybe getting people more engaged through Progress Reports where people document new stuff. Kinda disappointing when people are like 'yeah we can do all these things!' but you don't know how they got there. PRs are nice, for the person writing it and for everyone else who's interested

Yeah, that’s the pattern I see in the PR’s here. Even Bre’s old one that I sometimes pull up for motivation was kind of like that. It was a shame she couldn’t tell me how to get there in that report, but her advice on Discord makes up for that

I’m trying my best to fix that problem with my own PR, reporting every step in detail so I don’t just go “wow guys, I mastered visual imposition after months of not reporting anything!!!!”

 

The only other person of note that really went in-depth in an imposition PR was Yaya, and now even he (and his PR) is gone.

 

On 9/21/2023 at 4:52 PM, ringgggg said:

On 9/21/2023 at 2:49 PM, Miri said:

Never read yaya's PR because it well.. looked kinda confusing, might have read some of the last posts but that's all

Yeah, kinda confusing is the right phrase to describe it.

 

That’s also one of the goals for me in my PR, to dump it down and save from typing excessively so people actually understand what’s going on. I want the PR to be worth reading if anyone uses it as a jumping-off point.

 

 

Edited September 22, 2023 by ringgggg

[ringgggg]

I pasted these an hour ago without any context, so I might as well provide it to better clarify.

A couple forum members and I were chatting about the issues with PRs and the community's mindset when it comes to tulpas. Right now, there isn't much push towards trying to look past pre-established goals, or trying anything unheard of or undocumented in tulpamancy. The usual well-trod route of forcing usually caps off when people get to a point where their tulpa either seems independent or has satisfied their pre-determined expectations. 

I will say right now that that isn’t inherently bad, but it is pretty noticeable when not much work is being done otherwise. I can understand that it might not be a feasible for everyone (because of potential schedule conflictions), but, generally speaking, the boundaries of what's possible with a tulpa can be pushed further if the community has a proclivity towards following through with that notion.

This is more of my personal thoughts, but I worry that if we’re not occasionally keeping Tulpa.info fresh with new perspectives, things will gradually and inevitably start to stagnate and more people will just start moving over to talking about pizza machines or something.

Yeah, yeah, something something coulda woulda shoulda. I can hear people from here. I want to affirm that I’m fine with how things are right now. Truly. Everyone’s getting along great, even with the little setbacks happening every now and again. This is just my vision of what things have the potential to be if we all join hands as a community and work towards a common initiative.

I know I can’t force people to do things, but I hope I can be of motivation to anyone reading this. You and your tulpa have the capability to do great things outside of the realm of the discovered. Be a groundbreaker. Look forward beyond what’s already expected of tulpamancy. Right now things have kind of stagnated, at least innovation-wise. Most people just follow the instructions, but I want you, the reader, to feel like you have the power to make the instructions and share them with the world.

For Science, team. 

Edited September 22, 2023 by ringgggg

[ringgggg]

I'm fine with this PR moving in a more general direction, but I don't want it to be a "a3 and i went to the beach today it was super fun!!!!" situation, so stuff will only be said if I feel like they need to be. My mission statement for the PR is to keep things as surface-level and as comprehensible as possible, so that's what I'm gonna do.

 

Unhinged ramblings? Yes, please.

Edited September 22, 2023 by ringgggg