Confessions of a Poorly Trained Tulpa

[Guest Anonymous]

I just watched Ruby Sparks. My god, that just opened a imaginary can of morality worms to think about.

 

Hah hah hah! That is why I insist my thoughtform Melian is not sentient. Some sentient-tulpa people may view it to be selfish beyond belief, but it excuses me from any of the ethical considerations. I am an egoist after all. Ruby Sparks would probably have been badly used by me I am afraid. It was a cute movie though and thought provoking.

[King]

Hey man, whatever works for you. I personally fall under the camp that Tulpa are sentient (Unless you meant that Melian herself is not sentient?), but whatever floats ya boat! It's definitely got some cute scenes, but really makes you question the morality aspect of Tulpas.

[Guest Anonymous]

I pretty much hold the view that all tulpas are non-sentient and that Melian is also non-sentient. You are right, if tulpas are sentient, morality questions certainly do arise don't they?

[Guest Anonymous]

Autonomous Thoughtforms Created as a Result or Aspect of Emotional Disturbance

I wanted to address some of the things people are beginning to see in my writing recently. Anderson recently uses me as an example of something that I think needs to be discussed on the forum and not ignored or brushed away. Can a tulpa or thoughtform be created as a result or aspect of emotional disturbance?

 

As much as I hate to say this, and as much as it's not pleasant to hear, having a tulpa since childhood, well, having a tulpa without your will at all might have something to do with mental illness, or something with your mind. When I think of people who made tulpas at youth, Mistgod comes to mind; He daydreamed a lot which is how; I made my own tulpa via extreme obsession, and a call of despair to my own brain, so that's that, but having a literally sentient tulpa, and not an imaginary friend can be food for thought.

 

In the past couple of years I have touched on this subject a bit in my posts on deviantart. Much of it is deeply personal, so I did avoid talking about it directly for a long time here. I haven't touched on it a lot on Tulpa Info, but recently I have begun to bring up things related to general and social anxiety and emotional disturbance in relation to my creation of Melian.

 

In short, as a teenager, I suffered from low self esteem, excessive worry and anxiety and was shy, and socially awkward and withdrawn. I used my natural talent to imagine to create elaborate fantasy worlds to escape into and dissociate from reality. The star of these super day dreams was my Melian, and over time she became an autonomous thoughtform.

 

I wrote about my excessive day dreaming, which goes on to this day, a bit in this post. https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-unhealthy-tulpa-obsession-and-day-dream-idealized-perception

 

Recently Stevie posted something that just rocked my world. It was a thread about something psychologists are calling "Maladaptive Day Dreaming." I truly believe I have or had something like this. It was an addictive, obsessive escapism and inability to deal with the real world in a normal way. https://community.tulpa.info/thread-maladaptive-daydreaming

 

I am not saying that all tulpas are mental illness or the result of mental illness. But, I do think it is possible that some autonomous thoughtforms can be created by accident as a result of emotional disturbance.

 

Even though my excessive day dreaming, general anxiety and social anxiety were a factor in Melian's creation, she has been nothing but positive for me. She was a useful coping mechanism that allowed me to survive and to grow to adulthood. She is still a source of happiness and fulfillment for me. Melian wasn't the problem, she was the cure or the help for my problem. Melian was designed to give me strength, to counter my loneliness, to be that soothing voice in my mind and to give me encouragement. She was my muse and my inspiration.

[Guest Anonymous]

First off I'd like to say that I didn't mean to quote you and give a negative image, or a misinterpretation of what I originally had in mind. And I did not mean that tulpas are mental illness, I'd never say such a thing, there was a lot of incoherence from both sides in that other thread.

 

But to address your post and to remain on-topic, I think that it's really just... great to have that as a natural talent, Mistgod. Even if it was a straight door to escapism, I find it baffling everytime we read about the Melian Show, how you daydreamed so much in your youth, so much that it resulted in... Melian!

 

Now, if a tulpa comes from that, I mean, that emotional disturbance (and I can say that my tulpa was the greatest thing in my life that ever helped me psychologically, thanks little lady), I wouldn't regard it as something negative at all. Nor would I regard a tulpa like that as a mistake. And it's amazing to hear, once again, that from all of those negative things, something so positive could be born, which is really, really against the odds once you come to think of it. Way to go, Mistgod, I think you guys became a bit cooler in our eyes, specifically in mine.

[Guest Anonymous]

Thanks!

 

No worries. I am glad we are talking about these things on the forum. You were right about one thing, an accidental tulpa might be a sign that it may have been generated by something like mental disturbance. Certainly it is a possibility. They have to come from somewhere. These accidental thoughtforms require a great deal of energy and focus to create. So where does the energy and focus come from? There has to be a catalyst in every case. That just seems logical to me.

 

EDIT: However, I would point out that someone who has never been mentally disturbed has nothing to be concerned about. The very fact that you have an accidental tulpa should not cause anyone to question his or her sanity. LOL If you have had mental problems that lead to a thoughtform/tulpa, you would probably know that already, just like I do about myself.

[RaveCrazedDave]

I am not saying that all tulpas are mental illness or the result of mental illness. But, I do think it is possible that some autonomous thoughtforms can be created by accident as a result of emotional disturbance.

 

Oh, most definetely. I don't think there's any doubt in anyone's mind about this. And please, do not get me wrong, I understand very well how a tulpa or a sentient being residing on an unstable person's mind can really really affect them bad. It's as much of a dangerous concept as letting your kid hang out with people who do drugs or something like that (good job on the analogy department huh?) But I still don't think we should look at tulpas with that negative conotation. We could by the same coin say that someone who wrote a lot when they were little did so because they were shut-ins, but that isn't really bad is it? I mean, maybe I'm getting it wrong, and I'm the only one thinking people look at it negatively, but really, I think it's a pretty cool thing that happens. It's another defense mechanism almost, one that isn't studied all that much, and a very fascinating one as well.

[Guest Anonymous]

This is exactly why I avoided talking a lot about it in the past. My emotional well being as a teen is almost totally irrelevant when it concerns my thoughtform Melian today. It was a factor in her appearance yes, but that doesn't mean Melian is negative in any way. In fact, it is just the contrary. I don't want to overemphasize anxiety and emotional problems, just mention them as a factor that is important to note.

[AracnidsGrip/Rick]

The first video L saw about tulpae was about the bad ones. You know that silly creepypastas about bad tulpae. I didn't knew there were videos that talked good about us!!!

~Vriska Aranea Serket Targaryen. ♦️

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Thanks for letting us know about this videos Melian! :D

~L. ♠️

[Guest Anonymous]

The first video L saw about tulpae was about the bad ones. You know that silly creepypastas about bad tulpae. I didn't knew there were videos that talked good about us!!!

~Vriska Aranea Serket Targaryen. ♦️

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Thanks for letting us know about this videos Melian! :D

~L. ♠️

 

Yer welcome! I am hoping that over time, we will see many more positive, well researched and respectful videos. That would be nice!