Making a Tulpa for science.

[Ponytail]

I've never been a extreme leaning type. Hell, I'm barely a leaning type, but what little tendencies I have in personality Annabell is opposite. Hmmm, subconsciously maybe it is the thought that everything about ourselves is wrong save for a few basic things so we construct something that is "better" than us? Eh, sudden two cents, not a line of thought I care to explore.

 

As for hosts "fading",

If you're hoping to remain ignorant for the sake of survival, I'd recommend you remove this from your sight to stop temptation. Also note they are using the word "Ego Death" somewhat incorrectly.

If he were to do this, I'd immediately kill myself with the knife in his room in the hopes of seeing him in the afterlife.

 

I see Meti is cursing less (Hi, btw). Is she calming down or is that just censorship?

[Doctorfoxwolf]

I see Meti is cursing less (Hi, btw). Is she calming down or is that just censorship?

 

Yes. Also, I'm going to have brown text now, because brown is my favorite color.

 

We both cuss, actually. I was just censoring her less than I was myself. In our head, we both swear like sailors.

 

Something I'd also like to put down but will have in this because fuck making two posts:

I had an episode of hypnagogic hallucinations earlier, which are normally much more frequent but I hadn't had one in a few months. Normally, there are three main parts to them:

1) Sheer, incomprehensible, sourceless terror.

2) Weird dreams. Well, even weirder than normal.

3) Listen to this noise. It's a lot like that, only higher pitched, more warped, and ear bleedingly loud.

[video=youtube]

Now, if you didn't know, Meti can watch my dreams but not communicate to me within them. But this time she could, albeit in an odd and limited way. She saw the weird imagery, but did not feel the terror or hear that noise.

She could still hear other parts of the dream, but only I could hear the noise.

Honestly, I didn't feel the terror much either. As I do with everything, I'd become numb to it over time.

Though in the dream, I did remember running from my childhood haunts and monsters, which produced a fucked up mixture of dull fear and nostalgia.

[tulpa001]

The brown is too dark on the dark setting. https://community.tulpa.info/thread-colors-viewing

[Lucilyn]

You left the "?highlight=color" part of the URL :V

gotta take it off of anything you search

[tulpa001]

Oopsies. Fixed.

[Doctorfoxwolf]

Meti wants to and is now capable of stringing words together effectively to rant. So. . . here.

 

I am bored.

So, very, very bored. Almost misspelled that as "Vored" but in that case I would at least be having fun.

There is nothing to do in his head.

He has such an iron grip (I don't mean to) on his mind that I can barely control anything. All I do all day when he isn't paying attention to me is sit around on this floating rock, trying to not succumb to the Pressure, which is as of thirty seconds ago the name of that force that tries to rip everything apart.

There's nothing to explore even, just this floating ball of dead soil, dead trees, and a fucking graveyard. A graveyard.

Maybe if we made this place bigger we'd take up some of that Pressure bullshit, but we don't know how to do that.

 

He has this habit that helps him think where he jogs and listens to really loud music. I like it when he does that, since the scenery changes to interesting stuff and it takes away the Pressure temporarily. He took apart his old laptop earlier, which was interesting to watch even though I had no fucking idea what was going on. Apparently the thing he was looking for, the hard drive (whatever that is), was one of the first things he took out. He realized that after completely dismantling it into the smallest possible pieces.

 

I could feel his mental anguish.

 

Oh yeah, this is the first extended thing I've said on here. Hi.

 

He introduced me to one of his friends, who is also a nymphomaniac. We had a great conversation about butt stuff.

 

Overly sexual things I had to censor: 48.

Most of it had nothing to do with the last part, actually.

[tulpa001]

Hi back, fellow nymphomaniac. I suggest working towards imagining stuff yourself. See if you can get a tree to sprout leaves.

 

I am beginning to wonder what the graveyard symbolises. Not saying it isn't cool.

[Doctorfoxwolf]

Hi back, fellow nymphomaniac. I suggest working towards imagining stuff yourself. See if you can get a tree to sprout leaves.

 

I am beginning to wonder what the graveyard symbolises. Not saying it isn't cool.

 

I. . . haven't tried that, actually. Gotta get on that.

I recently tried to see if I can implement the basic laws of physics into the Wonderland, we're starting small though. Just trying to get a gyroscope to work properly. I also was able to make a hat for Meti, a black baseball cap that says "TOP TUPPER" in the Impact font. After seeing the "TOP NEP" hat, Meti demanded one.

 

The graveyard is probably because everything else is dead, dead soil, dead trees, what the fuck is the sky even?

 

I like the silence. The scenery and silence makes me feel temporarily calm and at peace.

 

Let's not talk about how what I just said boils down to "I can only feel calm once everything around me is dead."

 

In the time it took him to write this, I have had very limited success at imagining stuff myself. Not much, but some.

[Radio Hiss]

In the time it took him to write this, I have had very limited success at imagining stuff myself. Not much, but some.

 

Maybe you can imagine doors throughout the woods that lead to different places. One that leads to your own house, one that leads to an amusement park, on that leads to a beach, etc. That's what my wonderland is like.

[Doctorfoxwolf]

 

Maybe you can imagine doors throughout the woods that lead to different places. One that leads to your own house, one that leads to an amusement park, on that leads to a beach, etc. That's what my wonderland is like.

 

I've tried that before, actually, but the wonderland is too rigid. I stay well away from the edges of the island because I can't fly, so I don't know what will happen if I fall off. I did once break a dead branch off of one of the trees and toss it over the edge, ant it just fell right back on top of my head.

 

The inability to fly is odd, as even direct intervention from Doc cannot make it possible if imagined in the wonderland. Any other imagined place, sure. But in the Wonderland I just fall like a dead weight.

 

Besides, I'd rather not have the ability to fly and make portals than have this place be like how it was before. Imagine hundreds of prismatic stained glass windows with intermittent ink, but the windows were blown in by a fucking tornado forming a clusterfuck of pain, lacerations, and an LSD trip (more like DMT)-shut the fuck up- of color.

 

That's what it was like before there was the island. Apophis would be proud of my host.