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Shadow System

Why did I wake up tired?

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[Duck] I'm upset that I woke up tired. I was tired last night and this morning, but I don't know why. I'm mad because I want to play.

 

Duck didn't spend a whole lot of time being active lately. I checked on him last night and he was too tired to talk. When I went to check on him again, he was feeling a little bit down. After I cheered him up some, he wanted to play with Fish (another systemmate) but didn't because he felt too tired.

 

In general, the Grays will stay active for about an hour at a time and then they will want a break.


Spirit, Gerodious, Dark Gray, Fernardo, Jasper, Hope, Moltosha, Blue, Evergreen, Fish, Red Gray, Chrome, Bune, Exabier, Duck

Gray/Cat_ShadowGriffin- host, Ranger- basically host
[Click Here!] [We have an ask thread now!]

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If it's just you and not the body/system as a whole, then it seems like it's a mindset thing. Perhaps you view yourself as weaker or less developed than the rest? Do you expect yourself to have less energy? 


I'm Apollo Fire, the "Sun God" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa created December 2016. My systemmates are RadioPiano, & Indigo. Form images: 1 2

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{Wait, like without fronting? That's.. weird, and this part I wrote isn't relevant}

[hidden]Well, during the initial period of time when my tulpas would get tired after switching for a while, they also couldn't stay fronting while asleep. I suppose if they somehow managed to in that time, they may have still been tired, maybe? But by the time they could sleep and wake up fronting, they also were able to front the whole day with no problem, hence making it infinitely doable.[/hidden]

 

If you're not used to being active for very long at a time, and are suddenly more active than you're used to being, it's possible to be tired because of that. But it should go away after being inactive (or the body being asleep) for a while at the very least, so I don't know. Normally in-mind stuff like this is self-induced, imagined or otherwise without a logical "reason" to it, so..


Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.

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[Duck] After taking a break I realized I was overwhelmed, and that made me demotivated. I guess I get tired when I'm feeling that way. I feel better now, thank you.


Spirit, Gerodious, Dark Gray, Fernardo, Jasper, Hope, Moltosha, Blue, Evergreen, Fish, Red Gray, Chrome, Bune, Exabier, Duck

Gray/Cat_ShadowGriffin- host, Ranger- basically host
[Click Here!] [We have an ask thread now!]

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DID alters become fatigued rapidly if they rarely front. The conjecture I made about this years ago was that less active alters have fewer and weaker neural pathways associated specifically with them, so those are used harder and build up toxins faster, requiring those pathways to be taken offline for maintenance sooner. Brain maintenance is, of course, one of the most important purposes of sleep.

 

My ex-wife's rage alter could never front more than an hour at a time, thank God. Her joy alter lost a lot of endurance after having being actively suppressed for two years, having previously had near equal endurance to her despair alter. (DID systems typically don't have clean neat emotional segregation, but hers did.)

 

Differential fatigue has practical applications. One of my ex's other partners would switch again and again on long drives to keep the body functional and alert longer. If I'm on the verge of falling asleep on the road, Iris steps in, always completely alert. And when I return later, I may not be fully rested, but I'm much better off than I was.

 

I know I was surprised when my system started displaying the same differential fatigue issues I had seen in several DID systems. I had been assuming at the time that what I was experiencing was more different from DID/OSDD than I've subsequently come to believe. So I'm reasonably sure the phenomenon is natural and not greatly shaped by expectations.

 

I'm only familiar with fatigue issues with regard to fronting, but I could see the same concept applying to some degree to headmates that are rarely active inside. In terms of advice, it would be the same -- build up endurance by staying active longer, building up the relevant neural pathways. And obviously, believe you can be alert, rested, and strong, which is a good policy even versus problems with definite physiological explanations.

 

-Ember


Ember - Soulbonder, Female, 39 years old, from Georgia, USA . . . . [Our Progress Report] . . . . [How We Switch]

Vesper Dowrin - Insourced Soulbond from London, UK, Not a Tulpa, Female, born 9 Sep 1964, bonded ~12 May 2017

Iris Ravenlock - Insourced Soulbond from the Unseelie Court, Not a Tulpa, Female, born 6 Jun 1982, bonded ~5 Dec 2015

 

'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit

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Perhaps you were tired from splicing single frames of pornography into family films at your night projectionist job?

 

Joke.

 

One, Duck likes to identify and behave like a child, and second, he doesn't possess much if at all. I think it's pretty unlikely he would be handling pornography of any kind, much less making family films out of them.


Pretty much my main wonderland form minus the cat parts, that's a separate form. I'm not a hippo, I promise.

I sometimes speak in pink and Ranger sometimes speaks in blue (if it's unmarked and colored assume it's Ranger). He loves to chat.

 

My other Tulpas have their own account now.

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I agree with Ember, and as a comment to that, I can personally attest to some of it, at least. One of my system mates is kinda a container for our outrage, self-confidence and overall personal strength and presence (and much more, they are our primary protector and a great person, even if a bit of an arrogant jerk). When they front, our body surges with adrenaline and brims with confidence. I dunno how the others see it, but the feelings that bleed over from that protector are just so amazing.. Raw power, absolute confidence, not willing to lay down and be walked on or bossed around by anyone. It's really something that a meek or downtrodden person could get drunk off of experiencing.

 

Aaaaaand when they stop fronting, our body is shaking and exhausted, feeling completely burnt out as the adrenaline rush fades away. As a result, they intentionally avoid fronting as best they can. They firmly and loudly direct us away from any kind of positive triggers that seem to excite them or draw them out, for the sake of everyone else in here.

 

Other then that, let's see... I don't suppose your body has sleep apnea? Do you have an irregular sleep schedule, in general? It could be many reasons. You should only be concerned if it happens regularly, as we can all have low-energy days.

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