Beginner Questions General

[Guest]

Sure, anything. Some say it helps with immersion if there's a rational wonderland explanation for it.

---

You could reword it, I'm not sure anyone else will answer that as ut is, i could be wrong. The simple answer is imposition i suppose, but I wouldn't know more than that.

[Guest]

Here's something new.

 

Does anyone have a harder time remembering what your tulpa did or said while switched in?

 

Ashley just posted a word wall, it's pretty rare for her, and through no fault of our own, I don't maintain front while she's thinking for long periods. In this case i was watching what she wrote, I hear her mindvoice, and I could still feel the body shiver in my cold office, yet I was completely thoughtless.

 

Regardless if that was co-fronting, full possession, or a switch (since there was no emotional liability with that subject, it didn't matter), i am only getting a vague sort of, 'yeah we did that' for her post, and little else. Usually I can quote you at least parts of what I wrote with good accuracy. I can't remember much of anything specifically about hers. When I re-read it, it's only in recognition that, indeed she wrote that, but it a little odd to explain further.

 

I know this is an odd question for beginners, but we're beginners at switching. It's also pretty vague, so forgive me.

[CM]

Oh yes. Desmond keeps putting my things in odd places and I can never remember where they are when I need them. And when he goes shopping and I let him get stuff outside a specific list I often forget that I have those items and end up finding them later in my fridge and being really surprised for a second. I've also had Desmond play a lot of Fallout 3 that I have recorded and made into videos for our friends to watch, and editing them always feels super weird because I'm watching the footage for the second time and I know it was my hands that made the things happen in the game, but because it was Desmond it all feels so foreign and distant, almost dream-like sometimes, and I can't make a connection to myself and some parts feel almost like I'm seeing them for the first time.

 

So the short answer is yes. Definitely.

[Breloomancer]

The majority of tulpamancy systems share memories easily and have great difficulty not doing so. A significant minority is the opposite, having difficulty sharing memories. You probably just fall into that minority

[Guest]

Maybe it's a sliding scale?

[Breloomancer]

Of course, but it's not an even distribution, it's more of an inverse bell curve where most people are on one extreme or the other, and especially most people are on the "sharing all memories" extreme

[CM]

We share memories sure, everything I know, my tulpas know. Everything I don't remember is also missing from my tulpas' heads. Desmond doesn't know where he puts my stuff either once I forget it, he just knows it's his doing. I think in our case it's just a matter of me paying different kind of attention to what he's doing and it doesn't stick with me the same way.

[Guest]

I feel my experience was close to what CM is saying.

[Lucilyn]

our memories feel "tinted" with the view/feelings/way of thinking of whoever was fronting (switched) at the time, so like if Tewi did something and I recall it it immediately feels like Tewi (as a sweet bonus we actually see ourselves in the memories and not just Lumi's body), with the "context of the thoughts" also feeling like how they thought (even some systems who switch might not understand this - we think REALLY differently between us lol). So we remember what others did just fine, but the memories feel super obviously theirs. And I hear mine feel lighter or more optimistic to think through than say Lumi's, while Tewi's are usually more.. conscious? She pays more attention to the world going on around us I guess, plus she's super logical so..

[Jamie]

It really depends, but short answer, yes. I don't think there's a dichotomy as strong as Bre might have suggested. I think it's all about priming. If you are super stoked to go see a movie's sequel, you've been waiting to see it all week, you're going to remember what happened in the first movie. If you haven't played a video game in month and you finally pick it up to start grinding again, you might have one of those "Uh... what I was doing? What am I in the middle of?" moments. The same with switching: if you weren't there firsthand (in front), you probably aren't primed for it like the person who was in front. It's nothing to be worried about, and if you do worry about it, you can always ask your tulpas to make a note or two, write it on the planner, whatever.

 

In its stronger forms, there are quite a few memories that only Gavin seems to think about easily. I still have them- I just never, ever think of them, but Gavin can easily recall them. And then, Cassidy has all these memories of my childhood. Cassidy used to spend a day or two a week switched in at school, and when I looked at his pages of notes the next day, it would sometimes take me a while to remember what he had taken notes on, or what "remember the hat" meant, etc. There are definitely times I've found writing of his or Gavin's and gone "What, I don't remember this!" When I read it, I get the vague sense of "oh, yeah." It's just not like reading my own writing.

 

So, I don't think you fall into any minority, not off the bell curve. I think falling off the bell curve, in regards to memory sharing and plurality, is where DID sits- and not everyone with alters experiences large bouts of memory loss, either. (Also, take this as a good, very strong sign that you're switching.)

 

-J

 

Edit: Also if Cassidy moves something, 50% of the time I won't remember he's moved it, and will first look where I left it, then remember that's it's been moved. Stuff like my water bottle, a book, whatever. I don't misplace things like that, otherwise.