Romantic Relationships with Your Tulpa

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Guest amber5885

Romantic or otherwise neglecting human relationships for a tulpa is dangerouse behavior. But the relationship is personal for the tulpa and the host. Some people don't do manogamy. Some people are polyamory and some tulpas will enter a romantic relationship with the insistence that the host not reject an offer on their behalf.


Some people have also claimed that having a ranting relationship with a human and a tulpa at the same time has actually enhanced both relationships so it's very unique to the people involved.

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You should treat your tulpa with as much respect as anyone else, and that does include staying faithful to them if you are in a relationship with them.


Excuse me, that was technically personal bias on my part leaking through. I'll explain more in-depth, hopefully well enough no further debate is required, just friendly discussion.


"Faithful relationships" and the entire concept of marriage were created because, as humans, we value intimacy and personal, emotional closeness. When a human is dedicated to their partner, all of their attention in that area is focused on one person, which maximizes intimacy. Normally, when that attention is split in some way between more than one partner, the intimacy is also split - it takes a lot of conscious effort to remain faithful to two+ people at once to the same degree as you would one. With a more-than-50%-divorce-rate(in the US? I forget), I'd say the general populous is not mature enough to do this.


Open relationships are when you and your partner both explicitly agree that you are okay with each other being involved with another at the same time. With the established immaturity in society's average relationships, it's no wonder this isn't widespread, though in its own 'community' I know of many very successful open relationships.


With relation to tulpas, there are a couple of things at play here. First, the answer to this question varies by person, there is no single moralistic "right". As with open relationships between humans, it's up to your tulpa and you to decide whether or not you're both comfortable with actively being with another. If either you or your tulpa doesn't accept it, it's then considered being "unfaithful".


But the second was already mentioned - tulpas are not humans. This applies to those who are more open to different morals here; if you firmly believe in closed relationships, then that's your answer. To those less sure, the thing to think about is what Upper said before me. Does your tulpa take the place of a physical person? Can you give fair attention to both your tulpa and another human, neither relationship hurting the other? In my case, beyond a doubt yes. Like I said before, Reisen fully encourages me to find someone whom I love and loves me back. This wouldn't "hurt" our relationship at all. But if your and your tulpa's relationship is different, so should be your answer. It's up to you and your tulpa, not popular opinion.



That being said, none of my tulpas and I are in a "serious relationship". We show each other affection however feels appropriate. "Share the love." I'm sure many people do consider their relationship with their tulpa serious though, and those are the people that most need to discuss this further with their tulpas.


Thanks for pointing this out, though, it needed clarification.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.

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So recently I've learned that some people get into romantic relationships with their tulpa ... What's it like?


I have merged the thread Romantic relationships and tulpae with the new thread as they are very similar. If I my humbly suggest, perhaps try the Search function before creating a new thread?


See also :


One topic that no one has brought up in this thread that I think bears mentioning: the situation of a tulpa wanting to pursue a relationship with someone in another physical body


Kevin and I are different [from most] in that we are married but, not to each other. Kevin has his wife of 28+ years and, I'm technically married to his wife's tulpa. I don't think it ethical for me to be romantically involved with anyone outside that marriage. That's just my ethics though. I know of some people who have successful multiple romances, but that is not for me.

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One topic that no one has brought up in this thread that I think bears mentioning: the situation of a tulpa wanting to pursue a relationship with someone in another physical body, who could be a singlet (only consciousness in the body) or a member of a plural system (a body with more than one consciousness in it). I bring this up since T is very very interested in someone in another body. For us, I told all of my tulpas that with regards to relationships outside of the body (we don't do relationships with each other because we consider each other siblings, or mother-daughter, depending on which members of the system we are talking about), if they can control the body well enough to pursue it, then we are on an equal footing. That means that we don't prioritize my interests over theirs or vice versa. That of course means, in a monogamous situation, whoever finds someone first gets first priority. Of course, we kind of have a consensus that we prefer to get involved with other plural systems so there are other people to match up with or with singlets who more than one of us can be in a relationship with (they would know and have to be interested in each party involved) or have some other poly arrangement.


- Hail

Tri = {V, O, G}, Ice and Frostbite and Breach (all formerly Hail), and others

System Name: Fall Family

Former Username: hail_fall

Contributor and administrator on a supplementary tulpamancy resource and associated forum, Tulpa.io and Tulpa.io/discuss/.

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I tried to build a relationship with a girl a few years back, because "man dates and marries woman he has things in common with" seemed the norm to me. I think that it'll be the same in the future, just for a different reason ("I don't want to "cheat" on Rainbow Dash, even though she's said she wouldn't consider it cheating" instead of "it's the norm").

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