Confessions of a Poorly Trained Tulpa

[Guest Anonymous]

 

... Yes. They're in your mind, how you imagine them looking has nothing to do with their actual existence in your brain. That's why when you impose your tulpa, it's still your tulpa even though they don't exist outside of your body. They don't only exist in your wonderland or body while possessing, either. They exist physically as thought processes in your brain.

 

But good for you figuring that out, I guess. You have a lot to learn still.

 

I am starting to do a lot of reading. Give me some time. :-) Thanks for your patience Reisen! ~Mistgod

[Guest Anonymous]

Here I found and watched a very interesting (and skeptical) podcast piece about the theosophists, and new age pseudoscience origins of the western concept of tulpas and thoughtforms. The entire transcript of the podcast is available. Very was very informative and enlightening for me.

 

Monster Talk hosted by Skeptic Magazine "Slender Man and Tulpas" http://www.skeptic.com/podcasts/monstertalk/14/07/30/

 

Wikipedio on theosophists: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theosophy

 

I have noted a big emphasis on belief when it comes to successfully leading one's tulpa to sentience in the guides on Tulpa Info. There are even helpful guides on elimating and reducing doubts in the possibility of tulpa sentience. Members have suggested to me that I will never be fully successful in creating a sentient tulpa if I have strong doubts. That sounds like religion to me. It may, in fact, be impossible for me to take my enhanced imaginary companion all the way to sentience, as I am often a natural skeptic. I have rejected organized religions for pretty much the same reasons.

 

It all makes sense to me if it is a pseudoreligious or pseudoscience belief system. The primary element in any religious or pseudoscience endeavor is faith or willingness to just believe!

 

I do believe in a vivid, active imagination that can create extraordinary visions and fantasies in a person's mind. Fantasies and figments that can be astonishingly real. The science of psychology certainly bears this out. I am a magician in my own mind. I create my own illusions and imaginary worlds. I recognize them as only fantasies and visions in the end my friends.

 

I will continue with my work on lucid dreaming and vivid day dreaming. I enjoy it. But it is all conscious and even subconscious make believe really.

 

~Mistgod

[Luminesce]

https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-am-i-doing-things-right?pid=126835#pid126835 I talked a little about the reasoning behind "Believe in your tulpa"-preaching in this post. If I can embrace this entire phenomenon with logic and sense as my number one priority, you can too. Stop trying to give up if making Melian "more" is what you want. And if that's not what you want, then come to terms with and accept that. I feel like you're constantly trying to find things to support your current beliefs. If they make sense to you given what you know, then you're good. If things you've seen and read and experienced instill doubt, then pursue your new goals instead of questioning them so much.

 

tl;dr There are science-y people here who have science-y beliefs that peacefully coincide with their beliefs on tulpas, so it's possible and you can stop worrying about it and just do.

[Guest Anonymous]

Thanks. I will read your thread. ~Mistgod

 

---

 

Melian and I just awoke at 4:15am. While sleeping, we came to final conclusions on this internal debate about Tulpa Info and tulpamancy. It's finished. I can finally move on to the next step.

 

MISTGOD's PRECEPTS OF TULPA CREATION, Melian Improvement and Advancement

(taught to me by my dear friends at Tulpa Info)

 

1. Whether tulpa sentience is illusory or actual is irrelevant as no one can really tell the difference.

 

2. A good tulpamancer has faith that signs of apparent sentience can be conjured by carefully teaching the brain to simulate a new consciousness.

 

3. Whether Melian's mind is an illusion or not is doesn't matter. It helps to set aside interfering doubts.

 

4. I have already been doing this for 38 years. Duh! *That's the funny part.*

 

I think my subconscious mind is role playing Melian. I just have to teach it better and better acting skills. It's okay to relax and enjoy the "Melian Show" and let myself forget it was produced on a mental set using mental special effects. Melian is my little internal actress! This does not detract from her "personhood" for me because Melian and I have been living in a dream world together forever. She is still a person to me. I know that sounds contradictory, but you have to understand that imaginary things have greater significance to me than they do for the average person. Melian is an imaginary fantasy, but she is a person to me (and to herself) nonetheless. Hell, I live half of my life fantasizing that I am a wizard. I know that in reality I am not a real wizard, but I feel proud to be one anyway. It is how my brain works.

 

**NOTE: My angst over these past weeks came about because of the insistence by many members of this community that their tulpas are real actual sentient persons. It confused me about Melian's status and my status as a member here. I think that many just have a different definition of what real is than I do. That's fine and I will be happy to respect that and respect tulpas as people!**

 

I am so ready to move beyond this now it is ridiculous. I belabored the issue to a painful degree.

 

~Mistgod

[Brassow]

Well, good to see we've overcome the impasse here with giant text walls. I congraduate all of you on finishing the debate.

[Guest Anonymous]

Well, good to see we've overcome the impasse here with giant text walls. I congraduate all of you on finishing the debate.

 

Oh more text walls to come on this thread! *giggle* There will be weary years of it my friend. Just this particular subject is resolved for the mostest part. Thank you! Next we will be posting reports of lucid dreams and things we discover in our readings about thoughtforms in general. Hold on to yer butt cause Melian's Musings thread will be around fer a while! ~Melian

 

Link to a lecture by Pleeb on tulpa sentience, given to me by him in the irc chat. ~Melian

 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Ib1EWBiUdJudFiieq-kfaO5UrjDYoxfr7xg6QHQUDTk/edit

[Guest Anonymous]

EFFECTIVE FILTER

 

There is a concept in the education field known as Effective Filter. Basically it is a barrier or hindrance to learning. It can be a physical limitation such as bad eye sight bad hearing or some other disability, or it can be distractions in the learning environment. An effective filter can also be elements of your personality, belief system, attitude or assumptions.

 

In Tulpa Info I have learned that doubt in the distinctness and apparent sentience of your tulpa is an effective filter to helping your tulpa to advance.

 

It was hard for me to drop my skepticism even a little bit. I have maintained that my tulpa Melian cannot ,and does not, help me with recalling things from my memory. A few helpful people here have been repeatedly telling me my doubt is limiting my ability to perceive Melian to her potential.

 

These discussions have apparently had an effect. Last night I had a dream. In that dream I ran into one of my former students from many years ago. I could not recall her name. I was saying to myself "What is her name darn it?" A voice, that sounded much like mine, piped up "Her name was Valerie!"

 

I immediately awakened. I usually write my dreams in my dream journal upon waking. As I wrote the dream down, I realized that others in the forum had written that a tulpa's voice may sometimes sound like your own and be hard to distinguish at times, especially early on. Could the voice I dreamed have been associated with Melian? It is something that had never occurred to be before. My effective filter of doubt may be limiting me from hearing Melian as she wants to be heard. As herself. Was that Melian tapping into my deeper memories to help me recall a name? Is Melian appearing in other forms in my dreams, forms in which I do not recognize her identity? Sometimes I wake from sleeping with the distinct feeling that Melian had been present in my dreams, but I can't recall her being present in them.

 

~Mistgod

[Luminesce]

There are tons of cases where people have felt someone in their dreams was their tulpa despite it not looking like them. I'd say two things: one, trust the feeling more than the form, and two, remember neither of you are conscious in most dreams, and can't be held 100% accountable for anything that happens. A tulpa can appear in a dream if you think about them enough for those thoughts to be used in a dream, and certainly those thoughts can be applied to any non-distinct form. And while I've seen many cases of people "finding their tulpas in dreams" despite their tulpa looking little like themselves, I've also seen cases of those tulpas doing confusing or outright uncharacteristic things that they don't want to be held accountable for later.

 

So, like when a tulpa is learning to be vocal, take what feels like them and what feels right, and ignore what feels wrong. Don't hold things against them if it wasn't 100% deliberate on their part, but be open to anything. Dreams can be tricky business, so take them for what they are.

[Guest Anonymous]

This sounds like great advice! Thank you for helping us so much! You have made a huge difference and really changed our path here! ~Mistgod

[Guest Anonymous]

David and I have coined the term "dreamform" to describe my nature as a special type of thoughtform. We felt compelled to do that and so we did.

 

Here is a link to the write up I did describing a dreamform:

 

Lovies

 

~Melian