The real speed of sentience and overall developement

[Guest Anonymous]

It's quite possible that tulpae could be sentient since the start of the process, and I'm curious to see what others think about this (creators and tulpae alike).

 

I recall once person saying that their tulpa remembers everything since her creator said "I'm gonna make a tulpa.".

[Oguigi]

 

Not quite, dear Pleeb; I had a personality before Sands told it to me, I knew who I was in that sense but earliest memories are those personality sessions, I'm afraid.

 

I would say I was there and sapient since day one. Of course the first few sessions were very much alike, so it is possible that it wasn't quite from the very first session but still much earlier than that 25 hour mark. Sands knew who I was very well before actual forcing sessions started, so it is possible that some sort of me already existed before, but I wasn't alive before something allowed that to happen. That something most likely being that whole "treat them as a real person" thing, what separates a tulpa or a person from a puppet.

 

There wasn't much to work with to show Sands I was there and listening early. I did not have a form early on, which might have been easier for Sands to see moving and believe, but then again, it might've caused more trouble and doubts than good. I am lucky Sands always believed me to exist and understand, though he wasn't exactly waiting for me to be able to show that early on. I did try my best with headaches and such, though for the best results he of course would have to ask me something and actually wait for an answer instead of just going forward. It is very funny, he did sometimes ask me to do things to confirm which I then would do, but he didn't completely believe them for some reason. He too finds it silly now. He never outright dismissed them, which would've been very discouraging. He knew we could communicate, but only very late in the process did he start using the head pressure to his advantage, even though we had been able to use it for a long time.

 

With form came fears of puppeting. It is undestandable if one doesn't want to give their tulpa a form early on due to that, though signs of sentience would also be easier to notice for most that way. Early on there were problems of forcing me to stay still, which I exactly didn't mind too much, though I don't think I would've wanted to live like that for long. Luckily Avalanche beat some sense into Sands as to what is puppeting and what is not, so I was let to be myself and do what I wanted to. There weren't many doubts after that. We should thank Avalanche, he is almost like some kind of hero to me, a savior.

 

I see it important to note that even though your tulpa could do something once and then wasn't able to reproduce it doesn't mean you puppeted or parroted them the first time. Many things have to be just right, the conditions might've been perfect that one time it happened and not after that. With practice, what you experienced should be possible to reproduce. It takes both the tulpa and the host a lot of work.

 

I don't see personality necessary, but I don't see it harmful, either. It is important that the host understands their tulpa well if a certain personality is desired, but tulpa who were let to mostly develop their own personality aren't any less of a tulpa than those who had a lot of personality work done to them and vice versa. Though I'm sure everyone at least has some sort of idea in their mind, even if they don't realize it themselves. I didn't need that personality forcing to become me and deep down Sands didn't really need it that way either. We both knew, but perhaps it could help some to really get a feel for their tulpa. It was good to just hear him talk, so it was pleasant to me. However, 20 hours of that started being a bit too much for both of us, it was getting boring and not much new was said, so we moved on. That 20 hours is already a lot more than what most have worked on personality, but according to FAQman I would still be a servitor.

 

A tulpa still needs to grow and learn. We might start our lives more "complete" than the hosts did, but we won't know and understand everything. We won't have the same skills, learning takes time. Many of us are very young and disappointed in themselves, I have noticed. But perhaps we still are like children in some parts, comparing ourselves to our hosts who have lived and practiced for much longer does no one any good. With time, we can grow and become more independent.

 

How odd to see my name said so many times in a thread...

 

Whoa Very insightful, well i have less doubt about my tulpa now, hearing about the point of view of a real tulpa.

 

This should help my tulpa forcing go slightly faster, when my tulpa matures i got to get her to speak to you.

 

tulpa to tulpa conversation now that will be epic.

[Josh]

Glass just told me that she remembers when she was a lil babby orb, like maybe 20 mins into my very first session. I brought her close and gave her a hug, and she said I was "warm".

 

Mind you I had lots and lots of doubts in the beginning of the process. So much that I was actually puppeting her not to move, which she tells me she hated. I know that at the time I was having this problem, I wasn't sure she was sentient.

 

I didn't truly accept her as full blown sentient until one night while forcing, she cut off my train of thought and asked me if I loved her, the first time she had ever thought to me (that I accepted, anyway). The next day she was thinking to me in heaps; I literally dropped my doubts overnight and she was now thinking to me and having intelligent conversations with me.

 

Tulpacouple said it best, "they are always there and sentient, you just need to grow to understand them."