Stupid Jokes Thread

[Guest Anonymous]

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.

[Guest Anonymous]

I went to a cosmetic brain surgeon.

 

He made me look smarter.

[jean-luc]

I went through a brain-enhancement program. It was really horrible and I think I actually left dumber.

 

They called it "highschool"

[Guest Anonymous]

Could a teacher be considered a "cosmetic brain surgeon" and could you sue for malpractice?

[Guest Anonymous]

A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, ''Is this some kind of joke?''

[Guest Anonymous]

Three blondes walk into a building. You'd think one of them would've seen it.....

[Guest Anonymous]

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

[Brassow]

A police officer is on duty, watching the cars pass by on the road. While he sits there, he notices a strange car going by.

The car isn't speeding, but along with the driver, it has a DOZEN penguins inside it. The officer pulls the man over and asks,

"Sir! Why do you have twelve penguins in the car?"

The man replies,

"I dunno."

The officer tells him,

"You need to take these penguins to the zoo!"

The man nods and drives off. Several hours later, the officer is still on traffic duty, and sees the same car driving by.

In the car, he can see that the twelve penguins are STILL in there. He pulls the man over again, and says to him,

"SIR! I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo!"

The man looks at the officer and replies,

"I did! Now we're going to the movies!"

[ThreeSevens]

What do call a rich and cheritable werewolf?

 

A philycanthropist.

 

What do you call a great fisherman?

 

A master baiter.

 

What do you call a great fishermans lover?

 

A hooker.

[jean-luc]

Very lewd joke warning:

 

[hidden]

How do you know if your roommate is gay?

 

 

They get a boner when you fuck them in the ass.

 

[/hidden]