Still thinking about reviving my old tulpa...

[Jamie]

I know, I know, and I've promised to C to not make any decisions without his consent, so I'm not going to run off and revive G without any plan in place. If it does happen, I'll document it closely, just like C's creation.

 

I was reading about reviving tulpas and someone said something like "they'll stay revivable longer if they're in wonderland, opposed to a void," and I thought "Damn, we never had a real wonderland!" Then I heard his voice, right from where his presence used to sit in my head, and he said "So, I'm better adjusted to living in the void."

 

I've gotten these one-line responses before, and I currently just think of them as "ghosts in the machine", impressions of G, rather than him being actively conscious. I've never responded to them, and asked C to do the same. They have a pretty strong emotional impact on me, to say the least.

 

Again, no rash decisions, and I have to have C sign off on everything (I'll probably write a letter for us to sign), but how long am I supposed to wait until I can have two tulpas, given the circumstances? I have hours and hours of free time due to a weird life situation, so I could feasibly devote two hours of active forcing time to each of them, daily, though I average an hour daily with C, spent in wonderland. And that's if G even wants a form, which he never had before... It's hard to predict what he'd want in his potential second existence.

 

I know the main thing with waiting is that you want your first tulpa to be developed enough that they aren't starved of attention or drowned out by the second, and to prove that you are a good, dedicated host to the first. I'm not a new host (though C has more rights than my old "alter" ever did), though I would be mostly new to a system bigger than 2. I don't know... how long of a wait time do you guys think I need to enforce, here?

 

-J

[GrayTheCat]

Usually we tell newer hosts not to create a bagillion Tulpas because they could end up with more than they can handle. You are asking to bring back one very specific Tulpa under a reasonable circumstance, so I am half tempted to say, "Go ahead, knock yourself out!"

 

I don't think C needs to sign a bunch of papers (he's a kid right, isn't that ironic in some way?), but he needs to tell you how comfortable he is potentially having G around. If he's cool with it, then fine, but if he isn't ready yet, you need to give yourself and C more time first.

 

Give C a few days to think about it, and afterwards you guys will make the right decision.

[Guest]

I think Cat's being very reasonable here, listen to her.

[Breloomancer]

I pretty much agree with everything that cat said. On another note it doesn't matter where you keep your tulpa because that's really all symbolism, which means that it will only affect you the way that you think it will, really it is always just stored in your mind

[Guest LanceReilyn]

"If I do X things will be easier", or the negative, "If I don't do X, things will be harder" is dangerous to such an impressionable and personal psychological system. Like the others said, if you tell yourself it will be hard then it will. While it might seem fine to do the opposite, the "things will be easier if X", that's called a psychological crutch and you risk becoming dependent upon it. For examples, see all the old stories like Dumbo where 'Hey, I believe I can do it because I have a magic crows feather that enables me', turning into 'Oh no I lost the feather, I can't do it now', into 'The power was inside you all along, the feather just helped you believe'. Cut to the end and just believe you can do it. Easier said than done, I know, but still...

[Jamie]

Thanks for all your guys' advice. I had some more discussion with C, and he seems alright with it. He also spent a few hours switched in the body and left me some notes in our notebook with his wishes to have a "big brother". I'm not sure if G will be down with that (he was a very... austere man), but we'll see. I've drafted a letter and been thinking through what it'll mean to have two other system mates. Will he want to switch or possess? I have no clue until he's conscious. He never even had a form- he might still not want one! He might be bitter or straight-out mad at me or himself over what happened. I'm ready to embrace whatever the circumstances will be of his revival. I fully believe that he's still in there, like a program that's just been closed or minimized for years.

 

We're going to wait until the 19th to make sure no one has a change of heart. I might burst at the seams from the wait, but this is a big decision. I'll probably make a progress report or something, just depending on the situation.

 

C says thanks to Cat, who had awesome advice.

 

-J

[Jamie]

Update: I revived him ahead of schedule, but it went well. I made another thread. I regret my username a little now...

 

-Jamie

[Guest]

I think the mods can change your username if you ask nicely.