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Edit (10/30/21): Fixed formatting and typos. Changed color coding to our current color coding. Added small edits to some of these older entries.
Stone: Hello all. I’ve been writing down my experiences with Betty for a few days, and I decided I’d post them here, especially since things have gotten interesting pretty quickly for me. Feel free to comment with any advice you may have.
Day 0 (11/10/20)
As I was lying on the couch, in a position in which I could fall asleep, I decided to force a bit with Betty. I was in a room full of bins and other stuff, but I wanted to place her form in the room, as opposed to my developing wonderland, as I wanted her to be with me in a real location. I decided to put her in the crib, and as she is the size of an adult woman, she looked unamused.
I’m unsure if what I’m about to detail is parroting/puppeting:
I started talking to her. As this was a casual forcing session before bed, I did not write down what we talked about, and I don’t remember what we talked about. However, I remember getting verbal and non-verbal responses. When I asked her questions, sometimes she’d verbally respond before I was finished asking the question, and sometimes she wouldn’t respond at all. She also responded non-verbally with facial expressions. I remember these expressions as being somewhat unnatural but making sense. When I say somewhat unnatural, I mean she used non-verbal expressions more than a human would use, and used them in instances a human would likely not use them. However, these expressions made sense, as they weren’t completely random and did convey some sort of answer to my question. It almost seemed she’d answer with a face because my brain was too lazy to generate a response from her, or couldn’t figure out how.
I hypothesize that giving her a form has given my brain an out when it cannot generate words for her, and I’m hoping this will speed up the process.
This is not the first day interacting with Betty, but I’ve barely talked to her at all before this, and have pretty much only imposed her in my room and puppeted her. I feel like I got a response too early, and I’m worried this may have been parroting/puppetry on my part. I am excited if these were “real” responses though. I’m not sure if there’s much of a difference this early though.
It’s partially a shame this happened, as I want to organize these notes into some sort of study, but after opening with, “Maybe my tulpa answered as soon as I started talking to her,” this likely won’t be taken as seriously. And, that’s valid.
Day 1 (11/11/20)
I didn’t talk with Betty today.
Day 2 (11/12/20)
I haven’t done any forcing yet today, as it is 3:40a.m. (I was woken up by family). I was thinking about meditating before each active forcing session, as it clears my mind and I like it, but these stats are making me think twice about that idea. Still, I tend to get distracted and have trouble jumping into forcing. I believe short meditation before forcing may help me. Though meditation, at least the way I do it, focuses more on plain reality than the world of thought, and it might take me out of the world of thought (where Betty lives). Perhaps this is why it seems to hinder some people.
I’m thinking if I meditate on my tulpa, and not on my body as I usually do, it may help more than hurt. I plan to not meditate the first week, then meditate the second week, and see how I feel. People are different and meditate differently, so I’d like to see how meditation works for me.
I would like to personality force soon, and I would like to use Man’s method along with food-based symbolism. I have a list of personality traits here. I want her to be a rounded person, but I wonder how ethical it is to purposefully give her negative traits. I suppose I will give her positive and neutral traits, and, those traits will naturally have negative sides. Virtue is the mean of two vices, after all.
31 personality traits:
Affectionate - bun (they hug whatever they surround)
Amusing - Laffy Taffy
Charming - Pringles (the Pringles guy seems like a charming fellow)
Clever - barbecue chips on Bun (how does this taste so good!)
Confident - kettle chips (tougher and more sure than regular chips?)
Edgy - chips and salsa (chips have edges, and salsa has bite)
Empathetic - marshmellows (soft empathy)
Esthetic - That’s It bar (minimalist aesthetic)
Ethical - (ethical alternative)
Extroverted - Fruit Loops (idk just seems fitting)
Familial - Rice Krispies (families commonly make treats out of these)
Friendly - peaches (sweet and good for you)
Healthy - plain Cheerios (healthier)
High-spirited - Skittles (sugar rush)
Honest - plain toast (it is what it is)
Irreligious - pretzel rods (secularized pretzels)
Leisurely - sub sandwich (this takes longer to make, but it’s worth it)
Loyal - saltines (there even when you’re sick)
Maternal - applesauce (often given to babies)
Neat - mints (keep yourself and your breath clean)
Observant - Fritos (have you noticed these smell like dog feet?)
Outdoorsy - seaweed (or is it lakeweed in Michigan?)
Protective - oyster crackers (oysters have shells to protect themselves, and you use yours to protect others as well)
Ritualistic - Mobius strip Bagel (the endless cycle of traditions)
Romantic - strawberry lemon ice (pink)
Sarcastic - mint chocolate Oreos (means one thing [toothpaste] says the other [cookie])
Stylish - Gardetto's (the fancy Chex Mix)
Spontaneous - doughnut (doughnut think about the calories)
Trendy - (health food trends)
Vivacious - strawberry ramune (lively and carbonated)
Witty - “Berry Good” Lemonade (get it?)
Edit (10/30/21): To clarify, I would share this food with Betty as we forced. We never ended up getting to all the foods. After a while, Betty wanted to just be herself without personality forcing.
Below are some interactions I recorded. They are not exhaustive:
“How are you?”
“Yeah I’m sure you are. I’m sure you’re not just parroting.”
I feel mean now. “Apologize to the nice lady," I think.
I feel a stare.
“God this is so awkward,” I say instead of apologizing. I turn away.
I feel her watching me. I turn to her.
“How are you?”
“Are you listening?”
“What are you doing?”
“Paying attention to what?”
I burst into laughter.
“No that’s alright.”
“Everything’s ‘no that’s alright’ with you. That’s your main thing, isn’t it?”
“Really? What’s your main thing?”
“No. I made you say that.”
“Yes you did.” She smirks.
I laugh. “Yes I did. No really, what’s your main thing?”
“Now you’re just thinking of things with wheels.”
“No. You are.”
“No I’m not.”
“Yes. Think of shopping carts.”
“Ah you got me. Let me write that down.”
Day 3 (11/13/20)
Stone: I talked to Betty today. I talked to her a little bit about spontaneity with a doughnut. But, I think I could have explained it more. I will after I sleep, as I’ve been up all night. I got a lot of great responses out of her, and she felt there, but she tended to sound like me. I kept mentioning that, then felt bad for being overly critical of her, as she was doing so well. I also felt bad interrupting her and making her wait so I could write something down.
It’s only been three days and I hate this clinical approach I set up. This “study.” Or maybe I’m embarrassed by how I acted and am taking it out on the format. I don’t know. What I do know is that this process is for her, then for me, then for whoever may end up reading this. I’m not going to interrupt our fun and give us imposter syndrome so I can analyze every goddamn thing she says for some post.
Anyway, today was positive, and I hope I will feel better with some sleep.
I’m awake now. I’ve devised a schedule for forcing.
Sunday - Active: 2 hours
Monday - Active: 40 minutes
Tuesday - Active: 40 minutes
Wednesday - Active: 40 minutes
Thursday - Active: 40 minutes
Friday - Active: 40 minutes
Saturday - Active: 2 hours
Methods of forcing I’m thinking of using:
101 Things To Talk About With Your Tulpa
So i started development of a tulpa about 2.5 days ago and she's been progressing very rapidly. The first day I spent forcing I came up with a placeholder form and name to help visualize ( I called her Tulp before she chose her own ) and embedded that form with some basic traits i wanted her to be built around and started narateing and parroting her responses. a while later she began to answer me with yes and no. she told me later she knew I would think I was still parroting if she just answered normally so instead since she already knew what i was going to say she interrupted me while i was relaying the thought to her. The next day I tried talking to her more and she started to diversify her vocabulary a bit with words like sure, uh-huh, nope, or nah. Later that day I asked her how she was feeling and she responded with happy. Whenever I ask questions that require more than one word to answer though I feel like i'm definitely parroting because the responses are exactly what I thought she'd say and they don't sound or feel like her. Later that day we talked about what kinda form she wanted and she decided she's 6'2", has black medium length hair, fair skin, a wide mouth and a perky nose. I also asked her what her favorite primary color is and she said yellow. We'll keep working hard and i'll post more updates as they come!
i forgot to mention that i created a mindspace for us that consists of my room and her room ( witch she decorated all b herself! ) and outside is a street and on the other side of that is a park. the street cuts off on both sides and the entire rest of the area is covered in grass as far as the eye can see. Tulip spends a lot of time in the park and also likes to draw things from my memories sometimes.
Please note: I welcome comments, questions, etc. but please Private Message me if you have a query! Thank you!!
I'm just your average, everyday, "female" genderfluid person. I'm a spiritual Christian, I like rock 'n' roll, and my favorite animal is a tarantula.
This is basically the notebook I share with my tulpa, Clu. I will write about us, and, sometimes I might let Clu write a little. Welcome to our journal.
Let me start at the beginning. In 2010, a movie called TRON: Legacy came out. I loved it and thought a lot about the characters. Off and on, I would add to and play with a little complex world in my head. I had a crush on Zuse. I also thought CLU 2.0 was a pretty cool character. Let's wind the clocks forward to about 2015. I developed a major crush on a British rock singer. I also began to occasionally hear random voices in my head, and was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. I'll leave out the gory details. I took a medication that fixed the 'voices' problem eventually. Still, I would play around with my world (which part of would later become a dreamscape).
Around this time, I discovered tulpa.info. I spent many hours reading guidebooks and such. I was intrigued and badly wanted to create a tulpa, and I knew I could make one. However, I decided not to rush anything, and awaited the right time, bearing in mind everything I'd learned.
As I was building my world these past few years (and had watched original TRON from 1982), I found I had very elaborately expanded on a select group of characters. They were CLU 2.0, Sark, Jarvis, and Portia. I noticed CLU 2.0 was definitely the most developed; he had very far more original personality and traits than observed from the movie. It was also evident that I didn't have a cut-out plan for how the character was supposed to be like. Also, he would do and say things within that small world when I wasn't even thinking. I then remembered what I had read and gathered about tulpas.
Roughly a week ago, I switched medications. I found I could think much more clearly and was in touch with my mind. I realized Clu actually existed; he wasn't an original character, he is a tulpa! I made it a point to handle him some, and a couple of days ago, he started talking to me. Today, we had an amazing day together.
That's the history, basically.
Mala beads are also known as rosary beads. Their size and length do vary (such as necklaces and bracelletes). For the sake of this tutorial I'm going to be using a necklace with smaller beads
The point of this idea is to use mala beads to help focus you're mind and concentrate on forcing (in this case).
You use mala beads by starting at the bead in front of the Guru bead, roll that bead between your thumb and middle finger in your right hand (if your doing it traditionally) then moving to the next bead after finishing a mantra to do another repetition. You'd go all the way around the bead necklace/bracelet. After that (traditionally) you'd then turn the necklace/bracelet around and go back to the beginning, never crossing the Guru bead. While doing this the user would chant mantras and other such sayings.
This is the spot where instead of mantras i'd suggest saying traits of the tulpa your working on, or thinking of facial features and such.
I would suggest on only focusing on two to three traits or features for a session using the necklace. In this case i'm calling one use going to the end and back a use (assuming you have a long necklace with smaller mala beads). I'll be using three traits as an example. We'll call these A,B, and C. As though we would go A then next bead, B then next, C then next, A then next and so on.
Hope this has helped! heres a diagram so you know whats what.