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Please note: I welcome comments, questions, etc. but please Private Message me if you have a query! Thank you!!
I'm just your average, everyday, "female" genderfluid person. I'm a spiritual Christian, I like rock 'n' roll, and my favorite animal is a tarantula.
This is basically the notebook I share with my tulpa, Clu. I will write about us, and, sometimes I might let Clu write a little. Welcome to our journal.
Let me start at the beginning. In 2010, a movie called TRON: Legacy came out. I loved it and thought a lot about the characters. Off and on, I would add to and play with a little complex world in my head. I had a crush on Zuse. I also thought CLU 2.0 was a pretty cool character. Let's wind the clocks forward to about 2015. I developed a major crush on a British rock singer. I also began to occasionally hear random voices in my head, and was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. I'll leave out the gory details. I took a medication that fixed the 'voices' problem eventually. Still, I would play around with my world (which part of would later become a dreamscape).
Around this time, I discovered tulpa.info. I spent many hours reading guidebooks and such. I was intrigued and badly wanted to create a tulpa, and I knew I could make one. However, I decided not to rush anything, and awaited the right time, bearing in mind everything I'd learned.
As I was building my world these past few years (and had watched original TRON from 1982), I found I had very elaborately expanded on a select group of characters. They were CLU 2.0, Sark, Jarvis, and Portia. I noticed CLU 2.0 was definitely the most developed; he had very far more original personality and traits than observed from the movie. It was also evident that I didn't have a cut-out plan for how the character was supposed to be like. Also, he would do and say things within that small world when I wasn't even thinking. I then remembered what I had read and gathered about tulpas.
Roughly a week ago, I switched medications. I found I could think much more clearly and was in touch with my mind. I realized Clu actually existed; he wasn't an original character, he is a tulpa! I made it a point to handle him some, and a couple of days ago, he started talking to me. Today, we had an amazing day together.
That's the history, basically.
I'm trying to write that basic, "what is tulpamancy?" article but I keep returning to the same thought: "If someone comes up on the street and asks you, 'what's tulpamancy?', you should say, 'No clue.'"By Jamie
I really do find it hard to conceive of a situation where I wouldn't try to dissuade a total "normie" from tulpamancy. Now if someone came up and confessed, "I'm a tulpamancer, I started two months ago," I'd be instead excited most likely, although I still think I would not reveal that I have a 3 year old tulpa: at least not immediately.
I guess I assume something funny there: that anyone who reads a "What is tulpamancy" article will inevitably be thinking, "I want to make one" or "How do I make one?" or "I'm going to make one." All[most all] of us clearly had that thought at one point, and most of us probably had it while reading a "What is tulpamancy?" article. At least I did! And while I don't regret tulpamancy at all, I do increasingly feel that it is not easy to make it net-positive and many people believe their tulpamancy experiences to be positive when they are, in actuality, net-losses for their social, emotional, mental, etc. health. Whether that is more directly via tulpamancy-induced mental dramatics and community-based drama, or more indirectly via a tulpa being a poor replacement for external social contacts and connections and a potential distraction. Why work on developing a tulpa when you ought to develop yourself?
JD’s Guide to Visualization
Many people come into tulpamancy with different levels of visualization. It’s common for more artistic and imaginative people, as well as those with the tendency to daydream, to be able to visualize very well. However, some people find that they are very bad at visualizing, or even unable to visualize at all. The goal of this guide is to figure out your skill level of visualization, and to show you how to advance from there.
If you are experiencing this level of visualization, the most likely problem is that you are expecting to see your tulpa with your eyes, or see her image on the back of your eyelids. However, this is not the case. Visualization takes place in the mind's eye, that is in an area separate from the stream of data from the eyes to the brain. You'll want to focus on adjusting your attention away from your physical eyes, and instead to your mind's eye. You naturally use your mind’s eye all the time, especially for keeping your surrounding environment in mind. For example, observe this setup of cubes.
When counting how many cubes there are in this arrangement, you will probably not only count the cubes you can see with your physical eyes, but also the hidden cubes you can see with your mind’s eye (which in this case acts as a sort of mental x-ray vision). There are 19 visible cubes, and 12 hidden cubes.
At this level of visualization, you are looking through your mind's eye, but you've yet to achieve any sort of definition or significant color in your attempts to visualize. Getting beyond this stage is mainly sheer practice. One visualization exercise you could try is my very slight modification of Rasznir’s number visualization guide. This exercise involves visualizing a canvas in your mind, and asking your tulpa to draw numbers on each page of the canvas, starting from zero and going up to 100 with each step. Try to maintain visualizing your tulpa writing each number in detail, without losing focus. If you lose focus, start again from zero. I suggest that your tulpa writes these numbers in different colors as well, and that you try to name the color your tulpa used. If correct, move on to the next number. If wrong, start over. The point is for your tulpa to test how accurately you are visualizing color.
At this stage, you've got a foothold but your visualizations are still hazy like a dream you don't really remember well. To get beyond this stage of visualization, you'll want to focus on several different things. For one, you need to start practicing including smaller details in your visualization. Start by scanning your tulpa from head to toe, sequentially zooming closer on smaller areas as if your tulpa was being viewed in Google Maps. Additionally, you'll want to increase your ability to know the exact pose and form of your tulpa. Fuzziness can indicate uncertainty in your visualization, and turning the mind's uncertainties into concrete notions will help decrease the fuzziness as time goes on. To practice this ability, try playing a shape-based puzzle game such as Tetris for an hour or more every day. Eventually your mind will become good at knowing the exact shape of the puzzlefield, which in turn can be applied to your tulpa, reducing fuzziness.
At this stage you are competent enough to impose if you’d like, but to really make your tulpa realistic you will need to learn to refine your visualization abilities. One exercise you can try for getting beyond this stage is by going on Google Maps. Start at any location in satellite view, but zoomed out to a point where you can’t actually discern any individual buildings. Spend some time remembering the details of this overhead view. Once you can visualize it in your head well, zoom in a little bit and start to observe the smaller parts that you could not see before. Scan over the area and visualize these as well. Once you can do that, zoom in another iteration and repeat. Go as far as you like remembering details. The goal is to see if you can mentally reconstruct the map in your mind and zoom in and out at will. This exercise can seem a little daunting, so start with small areas and try only zooming in once or twice. After getting good at this, your mind should be capable of visualizing small details in the bigger picture. Additionally you must spend time going over your tulpa’s form and becoming familiar with the smaller details, just as you have done with the maps.
This is a problem that isn’t as common, where you can see the details of your tulpa, but trying to look at the full form is difficult, often appearing as a collage of details rather than a unified body. The simplest way to work around this problem is to visualize your tulpa from various distances. Visualize your tulpa very far away from you, to the point where she looks like a whole body rather than fragmented details. Ask her to walk towards you until you begin to struggle to see her wholly again. At that point, you’ll have found your threshold for full-body visualization. To stretch this threshold, you’ll simply have to spend some time visualizing your tulpa up-and-down at that distance until the collage effect starts to decrease. Sheer practice is the easiest way I’ve found of mitigating this problem.
You’re nearly a visualization pro, the last step is tearing down the mind barrier that gives your visualizations an uncanny dark or transparent quality. Growing past this stage will have you fully prepared for imposition. While simple visualization practice over time will resolve this problem, it can also be solved through meditation and some general realizations about how you see things. Your physical eyes send visual data to your brain, and your brain makes an image out of it. In essence, you see everything with your brain, not necessarily your eyes. Your visualizations are similar, in that they are interpreted by your brain. You must convince yourself that there is literally no difference between what you can see with your eyes, and what you can visualize, as the end result is entirely constructed in your brain. Your mental image of the world is entirely subject to your conscious will. Every physical object you can see is constructed in your mind only because your eyes react to photons emitted by those objects, and your brain decides to translate that to colors and forms. Every mental object is the same way, but the process is not subject to the laws of the universe. Your brain can translate your imagination into colors and forms in the exact same way. If you can meditate on this train of thought for a while, perhaps you too will believe how subjective reality is. And once you’ve done that, your visualizations will reach the vivid level of quality we’ve been aiming for.
Congratulations. You can visualize awesomely, and you are fully prepared to try imposition. If you’ve not already done it, try visualizing with your eyes open and compare the quality to your visualizations with your eyes closed. The exercises for open eye visualization are exactly the same as closed eye visualization.
If you are able to achieve certain qualities of visualization, but often find that these qualities only exist for brief moments or flashes and regressing to lower qualities, you will want to try practicing visualization from the lowest quality that you tend to hit.
Replaced bad image links with good ones. Original links here - waffles
Fixed the broken link to Rasznir's guide - vos
So I've seen a lot of people complaining that when they enter into their wonderland things don't look or feel clear. I have decided to share what I do when visualizing things in my wonderland, when I'm not being fantastically lazy.
This method involves cycling through all 5 of your senses while in wonderland, one at a time, slowly building up until you have all 5 going at once.
Before you start, make sure that you are in a comfortable position, be it sitting or laying down. don't worry about falling asleep, as dozing a little can be helpful here.
Close your eyes, and imagine yourself to be in your wonderland body. Your eyes, both in the physical world and in your wonderland, should be closed, so at first you will not see anything. Be patient with me, I'm getting to that point. Just keep your wonderland eyes closed until the end.
For the sake of example, let's pretend you're sitting in a field next to a burbling stream and a forest. Overhead, the sky is clear, and the sun has reached its highest point before it once more begins its journey towards the horizon.
First, reach down and feel the dirt underneath you. Pick up a handfull, and feel how it crumbles between your fingers. Feel the temperature, be it hot or cold. Keep the dirt in one hand, and reach out with the other, and feel the tall, dry blades of grass that surround you. Feel the sun over your head. Feel its heat reflecting off of the ground and the grass around you. Feel the breeze as it ruffles your hair and brushes your skin.
Now, hear the breeze as it rustles the leaves on the tress and the grass around you. There are birds chriping, singing sweetly among the trees of the forest. There is a cricket somewhere in the field. Turn your head (remember, keep your eyes shut!) and try to figure out which direction the cricket is in relation to you. is it behind you? Off to the side? In front of you?
Next, take the handfull of dirt, lift it to your face, and smell it. Smell the crumbled moutnains, the richness that gives the grass and plants around you life. Smell the breeze, wafting past and bringing you the smell of pine trees from the forest.
Reach out, keeping your eyes closed, and pick off a blade of the rich grass. Put the end of it in your mouth, and taste the sharpness of the sap that carries nutrients to the plant. Take a little bit of the dirt in your hand, toucch it to the tip of your tongue. Taste its grittiness, taste the nutrients.
NOW, tilt your head down in wonderland so that you are looking at your lap, and open your eyes. Look at the spot you are sitting. Notice the texture of the grass that is flattened where you are sitting, the soil it grows from. Look up a little further, and see the long blades of grass swaying slightly with the breeze. Look up a little further, and see the trees in the distance as they too sway with the wind. Look up a little further, up to the sky. Notice the sun shining brightly in the sky above, the clouds floating gently along on their eternal journey across the face of the Earth.
As you go through this, keep the senses you went through before each step as you move on to the next one. Feel, then hear and feel, then feel and hear and smell, and so on.
Apply this to your own wonderland, adapting it to your wonderland's environment.
As you get better and better at visualizing in wonderland this routine will take less and less time until eventually you will be able to run through everything in a matter of moments.
---For those who requested it, a sound version made by user PsychedelicDiamond is available here: http://uploaded.net/file/qgxz0chl ---
Good luck, and happy tulpaforcing!
Mala beads are also known as rosary beads. Their size and length do vary (such as necklaces and bracelletes). For the sake of this tutorial I'm going to be using a necklace with smaller beads
The point of this idea is to use mala beads to help focus you're mind and concentrate on forcing (in this case).
You use mala beads by starting at the bead in front of the Guru bead, roll that bead between your thumb and middle finger in your right hand (if your doing it traditionally) then moving to the next bead after finishing a mantra to do another repetition. You'd go all the way around the bead necklace/bracelet. After that (traditionally) you'd then turn the necklace/bracelet around and go back to the beginning, never crossing the Guru bead. While doing this the user would chant mantras and other such sayings.
This is the spot where instead of mantras i'd suggest saying traits of the tulpa your working on, or thinking of facial features and such.
I would suggest on only focusing on two to three traits or features for a session using the necklace. In this case i'm calling one use going to the end and back a use (assuming you have a long necklace with smaller mala beads). I'll be using three traits as an example. We'll call these A,B, and C. As though we would go A then next bead, B then next, C then next, A then next and so on.
Hope this has helped! heres a diagram so you know whats what.