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Why do some tulpas want to deal with real life issues?


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I'm too boring to only exist in the mind, life without the occasional shopping trip or cooking or walking the dogs through possession is incredibly boring for me. I don't like doing a lot of things in wonderland, I just want to be lazy and cuddle and fuck and complain about trivial shit but that's about all I ever do. I need responsibilities, real life contact and friendships to maintain. I'm just one out of 4 tulpas and the rest are just fine with what they've got without fronting experiences or outside contact, and if it works for them it works for them. They don't have an interest in the body at all. It's not like that for me anymore. Hasn't been for a long time.

"Chores" sounds like such a negative word, but doing chores doesn't have to be a negative experience. I enjoy the freedom. I enjoy helping host do her things. I like being useful and I like feeling that I exist. I'm pretty much just a loser seeking validation and living in host's skin doing boring real life stuff gives me just that.

Iro - He/they - 30th April 1997 - Host of the system

Desmond - He/him - 21st April 2014

L - He/him - 5th May 2014

Nevira - She/her - 14th December 2014

Misa - She/her - 5th December 2015

Roska - He/him - 22nd July 2019

Danyla - They/them - 13th July 2020

Asha - He/him - 13th June 2022 

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Thank you for the responses so far! I am glad I made this thread. The experiences, goals and needs people, both tulpas and tulpamancers, have are so vastly different from one another it is fascinating. Tulpa.info folks could write their own book about it!


Vesper's response about the body was particularly interesting to me. Melian doesn't like my body and wants nothing to do with it. That might be a huge factor. It couldn't be a worse fit unless I were an obese sumo wrestler or something.


(Melian just piped up in my head that being a sumo wrestler would be better. I think she is only partially kidding. "At least I would get to squish peoples and make money for it.")

Skeptical and unconvinced about independent sentience.  


Living Imagination  New Topic Index  Melian's Deviantart  Mistgod's Deviantart

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Guest Reilyn-Alley

I'm gonna assume our experiences are extremely atypical for tulpas. It doesn't make us "special" or outcasts, just different. In our case, co-fronting all the time means I don't have much of a choice. I'm up front and experiencing everything all the time anyway, so may as well pull my weight around here and pitch in when I can. Lance and I are a team and sometimes I just like driving the body around and doing stuff firsthand. We are pretty equal in this body, that, or I'm actually more in control than he is. It's a long story but there's no "host" or "original" either, so, just us in here running things. I've said it before but to us, the body just just a shared resource for whoever needs to use, to use.


Unfortunately, all this has come at the expense of wonderland/headspace/etc. Things that go on in there are pretty unimpressive to us, and come off as a vaguely vivid puppet show we put on, where I'm controlling a puppet of me and he is controlling a puppet of him. We can faintly see things going on but it's pretty typical that there's few to no sounds, smells, tastes, or tactile senses. Emotions, on the other hand, we can pull off exceptionally well for some reason and since it's pretty much all we have, we try to do thrilling things so we can "feel" something, but that comes at a cost of the brain getting bored of the same things and demanding new thrills or we just struggle to maintain focus on any of it.

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The reason as to why I like to deal with real-life issues on occasion is to fully understand what is good. Light does not exist without darkness, and so how would you know that this is good if you cannot realise what is bad. You could play games all day, but that is not as rewarding as doing a hard day's work in your job, and then the next day playing games. it will be a lot more enjoyable as the fun you have is contrasted with the shittiness of your job.


And dealing with real-life issues, and then doing other things is effectively the same thing. Experience the bad so you can experience the good.

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Well, B actually has a couple of fun jobs believe it or not. One of them is really cerebral and mind intensive, the other is really laid back and sometimes just outright unfairly fun, though sometimes it's also stressful as heck, so it would be unfair to do just the fun parts, and not everyone can stare at 20 year old research for hours and apply it, so, yeah, he can have both so I don't have to go down the rabbit hole for a week straight trying to model a possibly bogus process from insufficient data and explanation, lol. Honestly I don't know how he does it and stay sane.


[bear] Sane? What's that? Maybe I could try, 'a tulpa does my job' for a day and put it up in my PR. Up for that 14 hour day Dashie?


[Dashie] he also goofs off a lot and exercises for like an hour and a half, so it's not all work. I'll think about it.

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Why do tulpamancers want more than one personality in their body, each dealing with all the CRAP life throws at them?  I just don't see the appeal there.  To be honest, serious and sober "adult" tulpas seem boring and unappealing to me.


man, you read and read and deny and deny, and then you're absolutely baffled as to why we do and think differently from you as if none of what you read was actually the case at all... Are you sure you're actually trying to get us? y'know just because you don't believe something we say doesn't mean we don't believe it, right?


We're PEOPLE, at least to us and our hosts (and normally other tulpamancers...) if not to you. LOTS of us (not all of course, but a lot) want to experience more "life" than just talking to our host all the time, and it seems pretty hit or miss whether people are satisfied at all with their wonderland/visualization (we are very not).


but anyways, aside from the FUN parts of life, I guess I'd have to talk about Tewi to really answer your question right? I mean me or Flan or Reisen just deal with life when we front because it's our responsibility when Lumi can't do it, but Tewi literally switches JUST to take care of "real life issues", so you might have asked this question just because of her for all I know!


It's real simple! Tewi loves all of us, and she's also really good at taking care of problems and making sure our life goes smoothly. In fact she made her primary value some years ago all of our well-being! She sounds all super serious, and... she is, but, that sounds an awful lot like love to me! I mean, she's got her own ways of showing it (a couple days ago Tewi was imposing Lumi and he hugged her really quick and she didn't even hug him back xD) since she doesn't really express (or even totally feel to begin with) strong emotions, but she definitely cares about us more than anything, she's said and proved a bajillion times she would do anything for us and then done it. She helped Lumi a lot with school (only some college and a little late because we didn't know how to switch/do it for long back then) because she doesn't have the motivation issues he has (they "present themselves" and she ignores them), and she's done countless other things like going shopping to find healthier foods for us to eat, or I dunno.. just "things" she's better at than us!



So, why do we "want" to deal with real life issues for our host? Because, he's generally not here when we're switched, so we take responsibility for the life of the body for that time (even if I'm just here to have fun V: ), it's only fair not to push everything on him if we're gonna take up time he otherwise coulda been using.


And why does Tewi specifically switch with us just to take care of "life issues"? Because she loves us! And is better at taking care of a lot of things than us. Whether you believe it or not, she actually does think very differently from Lumi, her mind automatically sorts things out, thinks of the best way to do them, aaand is automatically motivated by what she believes is the thing she "should be doing" for our sakes, whereas Lumi has always had issues doing anything even if he wanted to do it, if it required any "effort" at all.

Hi, I'm one of Lumi's tulpas! I like rain and dancing and dancing in the rain and if there's frogs there too that's bonus points.

I think being happy and having fun makes life worth living, so spreading happiness is my number one goal!

Talk to us? https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Thanks Lucilyn. Please no one be insulted or hurt by what I am going to write next. I don't mean it to be insulting. It's just honest. Perhaps I like tulpamancers and tulpas for misguided reasons, not the reasons that they should be gaining my attention and dedication for.


Although I am absolutely fascinated by tulpamancers, I don't think I will ever really fully understand them. It's been years now and I still don't get it. I experience something close to what you are talking about, but I cannot get my head around why people want to take it farther than an "advanced day dream on auto pilot and extremely immersive role paying/channeling an imaginary persona." You guys tell me why, but my mind and instincts have trouble taking you at face value. It's too wacky and too close to multiple personality disorder or dissociative identity disorder. The switching and possession especially is really out there. To me it's up there with astral projection, ESP, remote viewing of civilizations on other planets, alien abduction, spirit channeling, Atlantis, and Bigfoot. I love all of the pseudo-sciences, but don't fully believe in any of them. That tells you something about me.


I will try my hardest to politely accept that you believe it, even if I don't fully believe in it. But I will never really get it.


I won't be making any more threads asking why you all do it. I won't be able to process the answers. I do appreciate everyone who wrote on this thread to answer me in sincerity. I am absolutely captivated by the community and what you guys write to one another and to Melian and I. I will try as best I can, within my own limits, to be respectful.

Skeptical and unconvinced about independent sentience.  


Living Imagination  New Topic Index  Melian's Deviantart  Mistgod's Deviantart

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At the end of the day, my needs as a person can't be met in the wonderland. I like to hang out and chat with other people, and Cat isn't exactly the most social person around... I don't like talking to the Grays unless I feel like I have to. Otherwise, having a conversation with them can put a strain on brain resources really quickly.


I also like fronting because it gives me something to do. I don't mind doing things, and even though I don't find myself getting too lost in thought, I still use our imagination for activities I enjoy such as writing and storytelling. I'm not all that interested in school right at the moment, but one time I was desperate enough for the front I ended up doing Cat's homework anyway.


While Cat and I could potentially spend more time in the wonderland, I just don't want too. One issue is time- a wonderland trip can take anywhere from 45 minutes to 3 hours (not including Cat's anxiety spirals), and school doesn't allow for us to sit around and do that all the time. Since neither Cat or I have major interest in spending time in the wonderland / mind's eye, we prefer to do other things by fronting. If I wanted more of a wonderland life, I think it's possible Cat could give me one, however I doubt I would be as developed as a person as I am now.

I'm Ranger, GrayTheCat's cobud (tulpa), and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff. I go by Rosalin or Ronan sometimes. You can call me Roz but please don't call me Ron.

My other headmates have their own account now.


If I missed seeing your art, please PM/DM me!

Blog | Not So Temporary Log | Switching Log | Yay! | Bre Translator | Art Thread

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[Misha] Our wonderland adventures are usually about 20-30 minutes at a time, and we do an lot of fun stuff. I don't think I ever fully switched, but I like it best inside anyway, maybe it's just who I am.

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Vesper's response about the body was particularly interesting to me. Melian doesn't like my body and wants nothing to do with it.


Vesper:I don't much care for the body myself, even though it doesn't hold me back socially. For sixteen months, I insisted I wasn't interested in it. Then Ember pleaded with me to just talk to her wife instead of relying on her to speak on my behalf. One taste of actual control and I was hooked. (Which initially took Ember very much aback.)


The takeaway there is to not give any thoughtform who doesn't already want to control of the body the experience of controlling it unless you're prepared for the possibility that they might start liking it.


It's too wacky and too close to multiple personality disorder or dissociative identity disorder.


Ember: I'm pretty sure it is a self-induced and less-disordered version of OSDD-1b. It doesn't meet the diagnostic criteria if it doesn't cause "clinically significant distress or impairment", but it may be neurologically indistinguishable. The upcoming fMRI studies may clarify the matter, given that method actors and fantasy prone individuals have already been shown to be neurologically distinguishable from DID alters:




Vesper: Veering wildly off-topic, the use of trauma-related cues in that particular study may mean it would distinguish even between traumagenic and endogenic alters.

I'm not having fun here anymore, so we've decided to take a bit of a break, starting February 27, 2020. - Ember


Ember - Soulbonder, Female, 39 years old, from Georgia, USA . . . . [Our Progress Report] . . . . [How We Switch]

Vesper Dowrin - Insourced Soulbond from London, UK, World of Darkness, Female, born 9 Sep 1964, bonded ~12 May 2017

Iris Ravenlock - Insourced Soulbond from the Winter Court of Faerie, Dresdenverse, Female, born 6 Jun 1982, bonded ~5 Dec 2015


'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit

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