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How to make my thoughts (those that I don't want my systemmates to hear) separated from the thoughts I want them to hear?


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It's been always like this, my Tulpas could always hear each word I think and see everything I picture, and see what I'm dreaming about when I sleep, and feel each of my emotions, and they both receive whatever my senses receive, but I never got to hear their thoughts unless they said what they thought "out loud". I want to separate my train of thoughts from the thoughts I want them to hear but if I don't direct my thoughts at them for a while, I always get lost in my train of thoughts and forget to keep talking to them, and that makes me forget to impose. And not to mention, it affects their parallel processing abilities. I don't mind the other previously mentioned things to be obvious to them,  but I want to have a bit of privacy in my mind... But is it really possible for me to keep to myself what I want to keep to myself and share what I want to share without forgetting about them in the process?

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[Evergreen] We can't parallel process, but Gray (host) sorta keeps memories away from me, especially the gross stuff. If I tried hard enough, I can remember or access it, but before that Gray not wanting me to see something makes it really hard for me to see it. I also don't possess much, so the brain isn't telling me everything Gray and Ranger get and I don't always immediately know what's going on.

 

6 minutes ago, Irisé said:

But is it really possible for me to keep to myself what I want to keep to myself and share what I want to share without forgetting about them in the process?

 

I don't know how parallel processing works, but I'm not sure why you can't get privacy because that's different from what we have heard as a system. Have you tried switching? If your headmates were okay with it, would it be more private for you if you could go to the back?

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One of my Tulpas tried to control the body quite a few times, but he never got to control more of the body than one of the arms all at once or one or two fingers at once or all of one foot's toes at once or one of the legs at once and one time when I really zoned out after relaxing all the muscles and was feeling kinda sleepy so I wasn't noticing almost anything, he was convinced he was in control of the entire body but then my mom (who, luckily for us, knows about my Tulpas and is supportive of my system) walked in my room and asked if I wanted her to buy me something and he said "possession" out loud with the body's mouth and she didn't understand what it was supposed to mean at first so she asked for an explanation and then either he lost control unwillingly or he gave it back to me, I'm not sure but I had to explain everything myself. We weren't able to switch properly with me dissociating and entering our Wonderland yet. 

The other Tulpa has no interest in controlling the body and he never told me if he ever wants to be imposed,  he's really passive for his age and stage of development.

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