Have any of you ever become too attached to your tulpa?

[Guest Anonymous]

How did this start though? Were you always this attached to Melian or was it gradual? And from what you've said, it looks like she was heavily encouraging this. :3

 

It has been that way since the very beginning. Melian hit me like an avalanche. She first came to me in a sudden vision. Melian began life as a romantic/sexual fantasy girl when I was a teenager. She was so amazing in my mind I spent a huge amount of time day dreaming about her and talking to her as an imaginary friend. Yes, she did seem to enjoy the attention as much as I enjoyed giving her attention. She openly and enthusiastically encouraged me to fawn over her and heap her with praise. She still does.

[KarlYoshimura]

Uh...

 

If your parameters for "too attached" are pertinent to one's life being somehow detracted from because of the time and effort one gives to one's tulpa, arguably we are all "too" invested in our tulpas. We do have to allocate a fair amount of resources to their creation and care as it's our responsibility as hosts.

 

Realistically speaking, I think it's more likely for an individual to experience burn-out (accumulated fatigue) from exertion. As with other relationships you may have, if you feel this one is detrimental, take pause and state the facts. To reiterate the sentiments of others in this thread, I feel it's difficult to accomplish too much of an attachment unless it's what you desire most.

[Solune]

I don't know how most people operate, but emotions guide a person's desires, but not their actions. If you are aware of what is happening, you can simply decide that your emotions are worth ignoring today.

 

Had a good long chuckle at that. To answer your unspoken question: most people find it incredibly difficult to rationalize/control their emotions.

You are a rare exception (perhaps not on this site, but certainly when compared to the general population).

[Tewi]

I don't know how most people operate, but emotions guide a person's desires, but not their actions. If you are aware of what is happening, you can simply decide that your emotions are worth ignoring today.

 

For your education, then.

[hidden]Human personalities and intelligence are not progressions, they're ranges. The way you think has no bearing on how everyone else thinks just because it is that way for you. Keep that in mind.

 

I don't have many emotions by default, so maybe I unconsciously ignore them all the time. Lumi doesn't have many nor does he ignore the ones he does. Lucilyn reacts emotively to many things, but she keeps them in check so they're always positive/fun and don't get carried away. Flan maintains a relatively small range of preferred emotions and is more like Lumi otherwise. Reisen's naturally happy by default. We have a lot of control over what we feel obviously, and we choose what we want to.

 

But take a two second glance at the rest of humanity, this is very uncommon. Are they all just "worse at controlling their emotions"? Most people don't even seem to want to. Some do but can't. Some think they can but don't. And none of them are living "incorrectly". Heck, both your and my host have been called emotionless by those apparently less able to control their own, yes? That's how it is. I honestly think without moderate intervention most humans are totally incapable of/never going to control their own emotions. And when they can't control their own emotions, they lose various amounts of control over their actions. Or I should say, their emotions control what they want to do in the first place.

 

Try not to think of them as less capable than you because of this. Controlling your emotions (or, controlling your emotions' control over you) may be desirable by your standards. But many would consider it unnatural and turn down the choice to be able to do so (of course, many more would accept) and others have no problem with the way their emotions work already. In case you or your host are anything like mine, you should try and realize as soon as possible that you simply can't change how people work on this deep a level. Not without a ton of effort and their compliance anyway. He spent years thinking he could "help people" think more efficiently/"freely" like he was so intent on doing, before realizing he could not. It's now a rule of ours to only offer our advice on these matters when asked, it's just easier for everybody.

 

Of course, everyone is a target for us on tulpa.info. No one is safe from our advice, because it's basically why we're here, and usually why others are here too. Though we learn pretty quick who is and isn't willing to listen.. Regardless, we learn an awful lot just writing here ourselves. Keeps our views from getting stale, and maybe we help someone sometimes.

This is me apologizing for the off topic stream of consciousness textwall, I'll put it in a hidden tag now.[/hidden]

 

Step one, read over what you've written very closely several times, fixing any errors you find. Step two, post and read it again. Step three, edit multiple times to fix all the mistakes you didn't notice the first time.

Sigh..

[War]

[textwall]

Hmmm. When I ask friends and family why they don't just not feel an emotion that is causing them drama, I am met with incredulity.

 

On the other hand, criminal law in all countries carries the implicit assumption that people can control their emotions. Otherwise, criminals who act on impulse would be forgiven instead of punished.

[Vos]

I've never been overly attached to my host. In fact, we don't spend much time together at all, so he'd likely be fine if I disappeared for some reason. I don't think that you can get "too attached" to someone that shares your mind (and will likely be with you throughout your whole life).

[Tewi]

In fact, we don't spend much time together at all, so he'd likely be fine if I disappeared for some reason.

 

Ow, my heart. Well we would miss you.

[Solune]

 

Ow, my heart. Well we would miss you.

 

 

I second this emotion. Whose notice would I secretly pine for if Senpai disappeared?

 

 

Hmmm. When I ask friends and family why they don't just not feel an emotion that is causing them drama, I am met with incredulity.

 

On the other hand, criminal law in all countries carries the implicit assumption that people can control their emotions. Otherwise, criminals who act on impulse would be forgiven instead of punished.

 

 

Disorder creates a desire for order, order breeds resentment and causes rebellion, rebellion paves the way for disorder which then begins the cycle anew.

You would enjoy reading the Principia Discordia.

It's everything you never knew you needed to know about anything.

[CautiousMancer]

@tulpa001 and others who replied to that: So whether I can resist it or not, do you guys think that my tulpa is indeed influencing my emotions?

 

Another update BTW. I cannot stress enough how loving and soft my tulpa is... And every time I focus on her and talk with her, I often feel her love. Sometimes to the point of gentle entrancement. I think it's too late for me though to be honest. I already want to do so much for her now and she won't stop loving me and being so amazing...

 

When I ask her how she could possibly love me so much, she's said that I grossly underestimate myself and that I'm a far greater, or at very least, nicer person than I give myself credit for. She also has said to me, in order to prove this, that only a deeply loving gentle person inside could have made such a being like her.

 

 

It has been that way since the very beginning. Melian hit me like an avalanche.  She first came to me in a sudden vision.  Melian began life as a romantic/sexual fantasy girl when I was a teenager.  She was so amazing in my mind I spent a huge amount of time day dreaming about her and talking to her as an imaginary friend.  Yes, she did seem to enjoy the attention as much as I enjoyed giving her attention.  She openly and enthusiastically encouraged me to fawn over her and heap her with praise.  She still does.

 

Do you think you will ever break away from that for whatever reason in the future? Or do you believe that it will only get more and more intimate and loving between you two?

[tulpa001]

Sounds about right. That is just about the same mush level my Tulpa maintained in our first proper week together.

 

I don't think you need to worry about it too much, but, yeah...

 

I would like to add that tulpas tend to exist in a suggestible hypnotic state, at least early on. This means they pretty much believe whatever you believe. So, they won't necessarily be able to tell you anything you don't already think is true.

 

@Solune: Fnord, fnord, fnord, fnord, fnord.