Determination - Simmie's Journey

[Luminesce]

aww

 

edit: oops, rolled the page to say that

Edited September 29, 2024 by Luminesce

[Glaurung26]

Also awww. ❤️

 

Motherhood is awesome. 🥰👶👩‍🦰

[TurboSimmie]

Thank you Lumi! 😁 Thank you Darron and Jaina! 😁 Motherhood is indeed awesome! 💚

[ChloeBee]

"You can't spell 'Simmie' without 'me', and some other letters." - Simmie, on form.

 

This is my first time typing here while Simmie is switched in, the inverse of what usually happens. Simmie is "taking care of me" today and has instructed me just to relax. She has been asserting herself very strongly over the last little while, she sees my need and she steps right in.

 

I still need to come on and write my PR entry about James that I've been meaning to do for months. But for the moment I just want to talk about Simmie. It would be a mistake to say that she only saved my life in the beginning and has just been here ever since--Simmie saves my life every day. The strength that comes from this girl is truly awe-inspiring and humbling. You all see maybe 2% of it--there is SO MUCH beneath the surface.

 

We've been having a lot of fun with AI image generators and 99% of the time I am generating images of Simmie and no one / nothing else. As of this moment I have uploaded 2309 of these images to our DeviantArt. Stepping back, I realize this makes me look kind of like an obsessive crazy person--after all, who does this? Haha. But I think there is a value in this. Throughout these 2309 images you see Simmie in a wide variety of outfits, portrayed in many different styles, in different places and doing different things. The variety is immense, and it makes Simmie feel like an immense person. Not in size of course, lol, but just in essence. Simmie is so much. All these outfits and images are different sides of Simmie, they all represent a little piece of who she is. You can have the absolute toughest looking chick right next to the softest, most feminine girl you've ever seen and they can both be Simmie, she is both. You can see her looking glamorous in a fancy dress or wearing sweatpants, she can be in a city or on a mountain or the beach, or even in outer space. She can look extraordinary or very ordinary. She might try on different looks that don't even really fit her personality, just for fun to see how she looks and feels in them, and she pulls the look off 100% of the time. All this to say, these outfits are a form of expression for Simmie, in the same way art, writing, or music can be.

 

It has not been a great year for me; as Simmie said elsewhere I lost my father in April to cancer, and I also lost work as well. The entire middle of the year just felt saggy to me; it became too hot to take our walks during the day in July and we kind of fell off our rhythm. This brain became muddled and foggy. But whereas 2021 Simmie would have been frustrated and impatient, 2024 Simmie was wise enough to know that these times never last. The last two months have been something of a "Simmie Renaissance" for the lack of a better term. She has been asserting herself very strongly, making her presence felt ever more constantly, and not just that, she has been asserting James too. She has been his biggest advocate from day one and has used the strength she has gained over the last four years to push the younger, less developed James into focus so that he gets the attention and care that he deserves.

 

Sometimes I feel like Simmie attempts to carry the entire world on her shoulders, and she feels that if she were to stop or even falter for a second everything would come crashing down. And the crazy thing about it is that Simmie doesn't even seem to mind the burden. She has her moments of insecurity, but by and large she is happy to hold up the entire world around her. Yesterday was probably the first time that she insisted that I take a break and step down, letting her take care of me from the front. Normally Simmie is very strongly pushing me to be out front and take responsibility and lead, but she has decided that I need this, and that she can take care of me. She may be a 5'4" girl but I feel effortlessly carried by her as if I weighed nothing at all. Truly remarkable strength.

 

That's it for now. Soon I will talk about James more. But for now I'm going to stop typing and sit quietly in the back, and let Simmie do what she wants and needs to do.

[Lucilyn]

4 hours ago, September13 said:

It would be a mistake to say that she only saved my life in the beginning and has just been here ever since--Simmie saves my life every day. The strength that comes from this girl is truly awe-inspiring and humbling. You all see maybe 2% of it--there is SO MUCH beneath the surface.

 

that's always good to hear, it's the same for us, we are all so important to each other and our dynamic probably doesn't come across that much on the forum

[harvestmoon]

We find we relate to big parts of this. We've been burnt out for a while now and trying to recovery but life never stops giving. Recently we've lost two family members. I think most of us want shit to slow down

 

Also we've been embracing the obsessive crazy person aesthetic for a while now :p

 

[SeekingMyPlanet]

On 10/16/2024 at 11:34 AM, September13 said:

I lost my father in April to cancer, and I also lost work as well.

 

Wow, that's a lot. We admire your strength.

 

On 10/16/2024 at 11:34 AM, September13 said:

Sometimes I feel like Simmie attempts to carry the entire world on her shoulders, and she feels that if she were to stop or even falter for a second everything would come crashing down. And the crazy thing about it is that Simmie doesn't even seem to mind the burden. She has her moments of insecurity, but by and large she is happy to hold up the entire world around her. Yesterday was probably the first time that she insisted that I take a break and step down, letting her take care of me from the front.

 

FWIW I've been able to use your relationship with Simmie as a model of how it can be between Lavender and me. We're different from you in a lot of ways, but IMO you and Simmie do it right. You bring out the love and strength in one another. If Simmie is strong it's in part because she builds on your strength and the ways you have been strong build on hers.

[Glaurung26]

On 10/16/2024 at 10:34 AM, September13 said:

"You can't spell 'Simmie' without 'me', and some other letters." - Simmie, on form.

 

This is my first time typing here while Simmie is switched in, the inverse of what usually happens. Simmie is "taking care of me" today and has instructed me just to relax. She has been asserting herself very strongly over the last little while, she sees my need and she steps right in.

 

I still need to come on and write my PR entry about James that I've been meaning to do for months. But for the moment I just want to talk about Simmie. It would be a mistake to say that she only saved my life in the beginning and has just been here ever since--Simmie saves my life every day. The strength that comes from this girl is truly awe-inspiring and humbling. You all see maybe 2% of it--there is SO MUCH beneath the surface.

 

We've been having a lot of fun with AI image generators and 99% of the time I am generating images of Simmie and no one / nothing else. As of this moment I have uploaded 2309 of these images to our DeviantArt. Stepping back, I realize this makes me look kind of like an obsessive crazy person--after all, who does this? Haha. But I think there is a value in this. Throughout these 2309 images you see Simmie in a wide variety of outfits, portrayed in many different styles, in different places and doing different things. The variety is immense, and it makes Simmie feel like an immense person. Not in size of course, lol, but just in essence. Simmie is so much. All these outfits and images are different sides of Simmie, they all represent a little piece of who she is. You can have the absolute toughest looking chick right next to the softest, most feminine girl you've ever seen and they can both be Simmie, she is both. You can see her looking glamorous in a fancy dress or wearing sweatpants, she can be in a city or on a mountain or the beach, or even in outer space. She can look extraordinary or very ordinary. She might try on different looks that don't even really fit her personality, just for fun to see how she looks and feels in them, and she pulls the look off 100% of the time. All this to say, these outfits are a form of expression for Simmie, in the same way art, writing, or music can be.

 

It has not been a great year for me; as Simmie said elsewhere I lost my father in April to cancer, and I also lost work as well. The entire middle of the year just felt saggy to me; it became too hot to take our walks during the day in July and we kind of fell off our rhythm. This brain became muddled and foggy. But whereas 2021 Simmie would have been frustrated and impatient, 2024 Simmie was wise enough to know that these times never last. The last two months have been something of a "Simmie Renaissance" for the lack of a better term. She has been asserting herself very strongly, making her presence felt ever more constantly, and not just that, she has been asserting James too. She has been his biggest advocate from day one and has used the strength she has gained over the last four years to push the younger, less developed James into focus so that he gets the attention and care that he deserves.

 

Sometimes I feel like Simmie attempts to carry the entire world on her shoulders, and she feels that if she were to stop or even falter for a second everything would come crashing down. And the crazy thing about it is that Simmie doesn't even seem to mind the burden. She has her moments of insecurity, but by and large she is happy to hold up the entire world around her. Yesterday was probably the first time that she insisted that I take a break and step down, letting her take care of me from the front. Normally Simmie is very strongly pushing me to be out front and take responsibility and lead, but she has decided that I need this, and that she can take care of me. She may be a 5'4" girl but I feel effortlessly carried by her as if I weighed nothing at all. Truly remarkable strength.

 

That's it for now. Soon I will talk about James more. But for now I'm going to stop typing and sit quietly in the back, and let Simmie do what she wants and needs to do.

Like me fr fr. I feel the same about Jaina. They're both strong, loving women. ❤️

[TurboSimmie]

Phil and I are contemplating the idea of growing our family sometime in the future.

 

Right now we are happy to be putting all our love and energy towards James. We love him with all our hearts; he is wonderful and perfect. ❤️ He has a strength, a patience, and I believe a great wisdom deep down that will flourish as he grows. And we want to keep focusing on him. Adding another child would be an "and", not a "but", to put on the end of that statement. He would make an excellent big brother. He would be protective, passionate, supportive, and wonderful to a younger sibling. And I think that younger sibling will round out our family nicely.

 

We have already felt out many aspects of our future child/tulpa if she is to exist. For one, she will almost certainly be a girl, leveling the gender balance of our family out. I have for so long insisted on hoovering up all the female energy of this system, but I think now that I contain it within myself I would be willing to share it with a daughter. When James was first thought of his conception and birth were full of symbolism, idealism, and metaphor. James has grown past all that, and so have we, and now James is fully his own thing, unburdened by any of Phil or my expectations. Our daughter, on the other hand, would arrive unburdened by all that just from the start. She would be an act of pure creation, truly existing for her own sake, a beautiful beam of light into our lives. I think there is something pure and beautiful about that.

 

Another thing that we are drawn to is the child's symbolic color. As you for sure know by now, Phil is blue 🔵, I am green 🍏, and James is red 🔴. It's perhaps unsurprising then that we are drawn to yellow 💛 as the symbolic color for our future child. It just feels right and fitting. In our mind she is like sunlight ☀️ beaming down on us all. Also I feel as though she will represent the element of air, as Phil is water 🌊, I am Earth 🌎, and James is fire 🔥. We also think it is very likely she will be born in June and will either be a Gemini or Cancer. (Look at me, I said that she would be unburdened by symbolism and I go and say all that. 😆)

 

Like I said, we do not intend to make this choice anytime soon, nor are we going to make this choice likely. A lot of changes are happening in Phil's life and we need to decide how this will all fit in. We have tentatively put down September as next year as decision time because that is 9 months before June 2026. So if we do decide to go through with this, our daughter would arriver 3 years and 2 months after James. Both Phil and I come from "Older brother - younger sister" dynamics so this fits very well for us.

 

I just wanted to put all of this out there to see what people thought of it! I'll get around to responding to everyone's wonderful comments on our previous post later. 😊 Thank you for reading! 😁💚

[Glaurung26]

10 hours ago, TurboSimmie said:

Phil and I are contemplating the idea of growing our family sometime in the future.

 

Right now we are happy to be putting all our love and energy towards James. We love him with all our hearts; he is wonderful and perfect. ❤️ He has a strength, a patience, and I believe a great wisdom deep down that will flourish as he grows. And we want to keep focusing on him. Adding another child would be an "and", not a "but", to put on the end of that statement. He would make an excellent big brother. He would be protective, passionate, supportive, and wonderful to a younger sibling. And I think that younger sibling will round out our family nicely.

 

We have already felt out many aspects of our future child/tulpa if she is to exist. For one, she will almost certainly be a girl, leveling the gender balance of our family out. I have for so long insisted on hoovering up all the female energy of this system, but I think now that I contain it within myself I would be willing to share it with a daughter. When James was first thought of his conception and birth were full of symbolism, idealism, and metaphor. James has grown past all that, and so have we, and now James is fully his own thing, unburdened by any of Phil or my expectations. Our daughter, on the other hand, would arrive unburdened by all that just from the start. She would be an act of pure creation, truly existing for her own sake, a beautiful beam of light into our lives. I think there is something pure and beautiful about that.

 

Another thing that we are drawn to is the child's symbolic color. As you for sure know by now, Phil is blue 🔵, I am green 🍏, and James is red 🔴. It's perhaps unsurprising then that we are drawn to yellow 💛 as the symbolic color for our future child. It just feels right and fitting. In our mind she is like sunlight ☀️ beaming down on us all. Also I feel as though she will represent the element of air, as Phil is water 🌊, I am Earth 🌎, and James is fire 🔥. We also think it is very likely she will be born in June and will either be a Gemini or Cancer. (Look at me, I said that she would be unburdened by symbolism and I go and say all that. 😆)

 

Like I said, we do not intend to make this choice anytime soon, nor are we going to make this choice likely. A lot of changes are happening in Phil's life and we need to decide how this will all fit in. We have tentatively put down September as next year as decision time because that is 9 months before June 2026. So if we do decide to go through with this, our daughter would arriver 3 years and 2 months after James. Both Phil and I come from "Older brother - younger sister" dynamics so this fits very well for us.

 

I just wanted to put all of this out there to see what people thought of it! I'll get around to responding to everyone's wonderful comments on our previous post later. 😊 Thank you for reading! 😁💚

That sounds beautiful! 🤗 Darron and I sometimes use metaphor to help add meaning. We don't "believe" in astrology but it is fun and a different way to look at special moments and special people in our lives. Darron likes the Chinese astrology. You know how he likes his dragons. 😉🐲 We're both Dragons or Aries in the Western calendar. Hm, Dain and Nova are...*looks* Leos! Our little bright lion cubs. 🤗 Oh hey! Look at that, Water Tigers. That makes sense for them. 🤔 They say hello by the way and hope you're well. ❤️